Shopped till i dropped bitches!

I’m back from my shopperoo and boy am i exhausted! I actually need a lie down, from indulging in litle luxuries, trinkets, heels, wedges, dresses and bras. I think i might even have bought sunglasses….even though it seems to be pouring outside, from my upstairs study window.

You name it, i got it. If it was kitten like…it was MINE! My feet actually kill! I had to buy shoes for resting in afterwards! Armed with my family, we had the best time ever. I really only got ‘TTYN’ ed’ about 4 times today and no pictrues were had. I was greeted and embraced with warm smiles and love for the little Glamour Puss and well i’ve never felt better. Pregasaurus has definitely left the building..for now.

I haven’t talked to Loverboy much today, because i’ve been busy delighting in girly goodies, with a *wink* and a *wiggle* and a ‘Yeah, i’ll take two…in glitter please.’ I talked to strangers, mulled over yummy mango flavoured frappacinos and discussed my future with my loved ones. I got spotted a lot and loved it. With someone like me, you either really know who i am, or you have no clue whatsoever. I like that! I’m like a little naughty secret people keep. Young, old, rich, poor, girl, boy, gay straight….there’s part of me for all of you. I fill this weridly large field of interest and luckily now, i have the right mentors to push the pieces all together (hopefully) to make the magic happen.  I want to inspire. I want to make my mark. I’m doing it with swagger, boobs, a giggle, a drink and in heels. For me, it’s the only way forward!

On my journey today, i met a homeless woman, who was cleverly disguised as a poor lady, who looked like she shopped at Marks & Spencers. She had at least 12 carrier bags of supermarket shopping in her hands and in the sunlight, she struggled to lift it, whilst huffing, puffing and wiping her brow,. I looked over and immediately, (being the Superhero that i am) noticed her strain, and thought i better go help. Not that i thought helping would do any good? I mean where the hell would i carry her shopping to?

When i got to her…i tottered over, faster than normal, with my boobies and eyelashes, she put down all her shopping, looked exhausted, then asked me for money! She was actually a homesless lasy and that was her trick! her little sneaky ploy to get money! The bags were filled with empty ceareal boxes and weren’t even heavy! OMG! What a cheeky…bitch! Now, i give money to the homeless all the time…HOWEVER the fact that she tried to TRICK me and made me totter faster than normal, in my fur heeled boots, pissed me RIGHT off.

I shook my head at her and pouted, almost as if she was a disappointment. i enjoy doing that to people. Allt he way through my life, i laughed would always laugh when peopel did that to me. it nade me feel like my jiggery pokery was all worth it! I mean, I do that ‘ooh my bags are too heavy’ trick to make big, strong men carry my bags at airports and train stations. It’s been done for centuries and by glamour pusses all over the land.

Doing it with grocery bags is so ‘EWW.’ If you’re gonna pull a stunt, pull it with the correct ‘ooh laa’ and the correct lighting. I mean, she does get poitns for looking like a Marks & Spencer’s mum.Yet when you got up close and saw she had no teeth and was all sweary and money grabby..the illusion kind of lost it luster. I no longer felt sorry for her.

I didn’t even give her a single penny and no not because i’m selfish…(I can be at times though and usually in the bedroom. Purr…) I just didn’t hand over the moola, simply because her act was SHIT! (That’s never gonna winner a pair of Gina heels from Scott Mills and Paris Hilton, now is it?’) Expert much! Most talented BBF much!

My kitten (Gucci) is currently being an attention whore, which is terribly annoying. Attention whores despise other Attention whores, which must mean, i still am one deep down…somewhere? I’ve trained her to be a Diva. I mean i didn’t call her Gucci for nothing. She’s like Posh Spice (who i adore) but less frigid. (I don’t know if Victoria is frigid? But she does look it right?)

Anyway Gucci has decided to destroy everything around her until i look at her and want to stroke her. She’s destroyed pictures of my ancestors and everything. Pissed all over them! What a bitch,. I ‘ve created a monster and now i can’t handle her! It’s a lesson to be learnt. I can’t be a rubbish mum. I’m gonna have to be stricter! (And yes, i am having a baby and not having kittens. *Wink-Pout.*

I think people grow into their names. I named her Gucci and now she’s all high maintenance. It’s true. If you constantly label someone as something ..and a name is definitely a direct form of labelling. They will eventually grow into that ‘something’ that you stated they were. Whether you call them Veronica, sexy, smart, dumb or a bad boy? Watch how they turn into the character that you labelled them with! it’s insane. i don’t know why that happens..but it does!

Anyway,i must go and tend to making a cheese & tomato sandwich before a quick ‘1,2,3’ groomage. Loverboys picking me up in 20 minutes, so i have to look like i effortlessly just happened to look this marvellous. I will use every moment of the 20 mintues to juice some kind of ooh laa out of me! I don’t know whether to go with casual but could be slutty girl next door? Or summer time dress..even though it’s raining? Like i’m so amazing, i don’t fell the rain!

He sent me a text earlier, when i was telling him how exhausted I was from shopping reading, ‘Just got home from taking a walk with my dad and thinking about you. Don’t get too tired! ;)’

I’m terrified! Does the *wink* suggest he’s going to attempt to *hump* me all over again and ferociously after our little bleeding problemo! I hope not! But he can’t keep his grubby little hands off me right now! I can’t kill me baby glamour puss, just because he’s horny! I’m gonna have to riffle through my drawers and find myself a chastitybelt. Infact no…it’s Pete. I’m probably gonna have to take a knife! 🙂

Now, i only have 15 mintues, get ready time. UGH!

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