Woke up this morning feeling half full, completely stressed and like everyone was doing better than me. (Don’t you just hate those days.) My head ached, with ‘yadda-yadda’s’ and i had so many ‘to do’s’ that it all just seemed to be eating away at my kitty cat being. I laid in my white sheets and stared at my ceiling. Then i leapt out of bed, had two Weetabix and with far too much fibre in my system, attempted to do a poo, whilst singing Michael Jacksons, ‘Billie Jean.’ Have you ever tried that? It’s almost impossible.
I have book drama, (i’m wanting to keep it in diary form and not in written out book form.) Top that off with La love life drama, people booking me.. but not confirming the dates and well i just don’t know whether i’m coming or going. Plus i have shoots to tend to and preferably before i get heafty! I need dates! It’s just too much for me to handle and well it’s the stray ends that i’m finding hard to knot together.
Just when i thought all was about to crumble…Wazza has a banter with me and perks me back to my normal kitten like self. We’ve got a massive project to try and sort out and i just can’t do it without him. Other are proving to be no help and well without him, i’d go insane! (He hasn’t actually abused me this morning? Hmm…he must be hungover?)
I’m enjoying the fact that just because i’m up early the FB pervs feel as though they have special *one on one* time with me. NO! If i’m up this early, it’s obviously because i have to work, so you can save your ‘pussy’ and ‘i want it’ banter for a afr less stressed Doll of Glamour! I’e also had Hot Matty in LA ask me to alias him as the ‘Big dicked italian.’ Erm..why? Surely ‘Hot Matty’ would suffice? He claims that if i don’t he has ‘big dicked attorneys’...I just *yawned* at his behaviour…like attorney’s don’t love me and all of this at 9.41am? Well in LA it’s more like 11.41am or something…so i’ll let himoff for being drunk. (God, i’m sooo need the toilet AGAIN!!)
Last night, Harriet & I decided we were going to figure out life and in the process destory things. I can’t really tell you what we were talking about, (coz everyone will know that we’re bitches) but we do want to save the Barbie’s of the world or simply question them?
Not sure what happened but we got onto killing people with poisoned apples or spindle needle pricks? (She wanted ot keep it fairytale.) I don’t like people bleeding, and informed her of my concern. She therefore questioned my priorites in life, claiming that she enjoys how i could poison someone to DEATH, but simply can’t give them a little pin prick. (I’ve had too many pricks in my life, to enjoy them anymore.) I pointed out that she would rather poison apple someone than actually just do a simple drink with them. Lol. (Oh and note: I went with ‘apple’ simply because it kinda sounded like a healthy option.)
My Wunnarettes are getting their G.C.S.E resulys today. I thought that everyone had already got them? However anyhow, i guess my kittens, are getting theirs fashionably late! They reminded me that i told them that ‘you don’t need G.C.S.E’s in Hollywood.’ Oopsie! But really honestly…if you go…you don’t! (Just for the record, i got ace G.C.S.E’s. I don’t know why you swines find that so hard ot believe? But i like really actually did much!)
I’m having a bit of a ‘can’t be arsed’ day, yet it’s fine as i’ll just take it out of Pete. My tan looks amazing…everyone get a Fake Bake spray tan…they are delicious. For some reason, i’m hormonal bad at Loverboy, but i don’t quite know why? And i’m just finding all my book stuff…stressful. It’s hard when you can’t actually run away from something. I mean that’s my usual form of attack. *Mess it up, then run for the hills.* (That’s a half lie… don’t run.)
I think, i’m just having a bit of a low day and i need gifts in order to cheer me up. Expensive ones. I’m refusing to wear tartan shoes. I eahc and every Wunan fan of this world. Men are asking to ‘tuck me in’ and I’m never going into ‘The Broken Bridge’ in Ponty again…with sight.
‘Lashes’ is texting. ‘Latin lover’ is trying to re-love and i’m happily pregnant to Loverboy in Pontefract. Welcome to my life! *grabs poisoned appled-licks it.*
On a merrier note…i’m getting so many lovely lovely messages from you girls of the world. I LOVE YOU!!!