So, I got in from work at around 7pm, after a little rush ‘get my errands done’ rush around, after a little chat with work mate Adam, about our love lives behind Christmas trees (I love Adam, we get on well, and we seem to have these awesome conversation about life, that people wouldn’t ever think we would tango with) ….left work shattered but smiling…bought sushi, then as soon as I flung my house door open, (Ruby had been picked up by my Mother, who was venturing her way to my place with my loin fruit numero uno) and I simply must have got changed in a haze, poured myself a glass of vino and just PASSED OUT ASLEEP on my own uncomfortable leather sofa.
That was me done. I was out like a light. The rest of the evening seemed to be little ‘blurs’ of life, where Ruby or my Mum kept nudging me up, to do things, really normal mundane things, that my glamourous little body contemplated tending to, yet decided to go with with ‘can’t be arsed.’ I noticed that I hadn’t even DRANK MY WINE. It just sat there, all lonely, with no one to love. It sat there all night..like the last pull in a nightclub, who has their sad fingers crossed, that someone will desire them before ‘lights up.’ I enjoy how i couldn’t seem to move my body (out of pure work shatteredness…plus, the fact that for the past couple nights the babies have rummaged into my bed all night, making sleep time not so easy.) But yes, I couldn’t move to do things like switch a lamp on, but i could wake up in a dream like state and shout at people to ‘NOT SPILL MY WINE.’ 🙂 The wine sat there alone and is still there now. 🙂 It didn’t get spilled once. Even my children are so cleverly educated to know that ‘spilling the wine’ is a no go. They play around it. HAHA.
Work was great. I love that it’s turning into Christmas. It makes me feel excited. My body took a beat down and well Ben and I have been having the most wonderful time together…however, we’re waking up in a bed, with little Asian babies wedged between us…asking for ‘MORE’ of everything, kicking, chattering and taking up all the room. (‘Welcome to family life sir?’)
Ben and i went out for drinks the other night, after i quickly cooked tea…and when we go home, and because I can’t handle laying on his pec without falling asleep, I passed out tired again and i think that he had to carry me up to bed? I kinda wished that he would’ve nudged me up…because we were having this awesome conversation about our future…homes…togetherness…and everything in between….which always puts me in the mood for a bit of ‘loving.’ 😉 When it comes to ‘the bedroom,’ were great! I’m heavily attracted to Ben, which is always a really good thing, because I always feel as though balance in relationships is essential. Friendship, loyalty, future building, family life, fun, love and sex, should all take part in a tick box when thinking about life partners. If you don’t have them all, then you are making do….which causes fighting…and fighting gets long after a while, as i know some guys who have ‘wackadoodee’ girlfriends and some girls who have hideously inattentive boyfriends..and all i think is that, it must be the most tiring thing ever! I know, i’ve been there previously and well, your ‘heart’, your ‘girl,’…your ‘boy’ should always be your happy place, your peace, your fun, you station of support. If you’re going home to constant drama, or on the other end of phone line drama…to the point where you can remember ‘happy times’ individually…then there’s more fighting than good times…and that is not a healthy kind of love. I’ve learnt a lot through my past relationships, and i’ve never let it get me down, i’ve adjusted appropriately and taking each new love, which really is only Ben in 2 entire years of being single…with fresh eyes and a whole heart. If you don’t give something your all…it will always end up being fucked.
Well…we’re coming into our fall season. I enjoy my fall wardrobe, yet don’t enjoy the season itself, as I find it ‘grey’ and not ‘black or ‘white.’ I was explaining this to Dodge, who loves a bit of ‘grey.’ (Not Christian.) And well, i like the idea and the romantic view of Autumn…sweaters…warm cups of cocoa, gentle rinses of rain….cosy fires…crisp air…Yet to me, it’s really just a shitty intro to an absolutely exciting CHRISTMAS. It’s the ‘not knowing where you’re going’ dating before you get to the big ‘finally in a relationship’ finish. But i’ll still rock my Autumn knee high boots and fur rimmed, posh coats, diamantes in the lot. I’m not a hater and certainly a glamour puss. Plus, Danielle showed me boots. (She needs to be my PA.) If you can’t BEAT the season. JOIN IT..with faux fur.
At least Summer is pretty much over now. We can all knuckle down, couple up and get down to business. Working is much easier in the Winter. There’s no beer gardens, sun, booty shorts or fun. So, during these months i demand that we all get productive without distraction. Make some MONEY and join my Operation ‘it’s cold so accumulate.’ If you’re skint work hard, accumulate your funds and start it now. You’ll feel so much better for it. And ‘having a bit of dosh’ it’s not that hard to achieve. All you have to do is make it, and then choose to have more, than you SPEND. 🙂 Wacky concept. But it really works. That way you’ll always be rich and you’ll never have to wait until your card declines before you know you’re broke. YIpppeee! 🙂 Accumulate lots…and then you’ll be able to get whatever you want, whenever you want. As humans, who adore the high life, or to splurge on nights out and nice things…it’s kinda hard for us to refrain from making excuses, as to why we can’t seem to accumulate. BUT WE CAN! LET’S DO IT! WITH BELLS ON! Think about what you’re spending your dollars on and try and balance life out a bit.
Then splash it all on Christmas and start all over again in ‘Broke January.’ HAHAHA.
Santa loves us!
Right, other than that! I’ve had lots of conversations with folk, all different folk (be it randoms, Adam by Christmas trees, Ben on the sofa…chicks by bacon) all sorts of people…about love and marriage. Now, i either know a lot about marriage, know nothing about marriage or i’m just a chick that men like to marry? Who knows? But i like being a wife in general. Like I was explaining to Ben the other evening, how it’s so weird that i’m so loosely moralled and so opened minded about literally EVERYTHING in life. Yet when it comes to that, I weirdly possess these hardcore traditional views that stem from my inner romance and how i see my future pretty much. Plus, how i’ve been raised. I mean my parents have been together for EVER and i love that deeply. I’m not a ‘it’s just a piece of paper’ girl. But thoroughly respect the couples that don’t feel the need to ‘paper up.’ Lol
But Adam and I…as were Gemma and I, talking about marriage and how you know when it’s right, yesterday. And even though i’m traditional on such a matter, I actually don’t think there’s any rules. See! Weird right! You’ll know, when you know and you’ll know because your heart and head will tell you it’s right. It’ll be a pull and feeling that seals over you, magically and you’ll look at the person who has your heart and know that you couldn’t or wouldn’t want to be with anyone else but that person for the rest of ‘doing life,’ because you know that life without that ‘other’ would be a bit shittier. Until you have that feeling and you have felt it for some time…then you know it’s right. You should marry your best friend. Those relationships, if solid, are the only ones that last a lifetime. I’ve never done that before. I’ve never ever married my best friend. Hence why i’m 3 husbands down. But you can’t marry someone after a couples weeks or a day, can you. 🙂 Learning the hard way! Oh shut up, i’m a hopeless romantic.
(I’m currently getting a ‘Flash Back’ of Rich at TGI’s. He’s a funny little eater, because he gets really excited about what he’s ordered and he KNOWS exactly WHAT he’s going to order before you’ve even hit the joint…which i like. Knowing what you want is always good. At the time, Katty picked well and fast. She picked the best meal at the speed of light. I will always pick the exact same thing. I’m a creature of habit because i like things to be EASY. Meals, boys, puzzles, life…anything. 🙂 Ben seemed to scour the whole entire menu, which was like a NOVEL and because he loved everything didn’t know what to pick. He picked wrong. But learnt from it. HAHA.
Katty ate her salad, I bought what she called the ‘show meal,’ which i would, wouldn’t I! Ben devours his because he’s hungry, but RICH has a technique to eating his meal, his burger, his sauce, his everything, There’s an specific method and everything as to what gets dipped with what and when, is a particular process and he appreciates it if everyone follows his technique and will even give you pointers on how to eat your meal, if you look like you need help! HAHAHA. It ace! It’s funny! And he does it with this face of glee, like he has found complete satisfaction in life because he has found the best way to eat his burger. HAHAH. Not sure why marriage made me think of that? But fuck it. Welcome to my mind!