Life’s okay. I’ve been working on my monologue & scripts all morning, on my own, in my bedroom, as a tortoise crawled around my floor, weeing on things.
I’m lying. Life isn’t JUST okay, it’s actually amazing. I’m feeling great, after having a couple of stressy days. Shit days, where you commit to feeling sorry for yourself. Those days that never seem to flipping end. Haha. They just keeeeep ooooon going.
Luckily, they did end…and thankfully it all perked up after a meet up with Miss. Murphy by Christmas trees & fairy lights, with WhatsApp messages from Meli & her love life, black ‘because I’m vegan’ tea, diet chats, kids with cake, doing life and then red wine at Rogerthorpe Manor, under the night sky, to close off.
It just felt really late. But it wasn’t. When I got home my mum was at mine, beaming with smiles…I’m lucky like that. She always catches on when I’m having a shit time…and makes it better, with all sorts of jiggers pokery. (I love that my predictive text tried to make me type ‘pink eye’ instead of ‘pokery.’)
I still haven’t got around to telling you about all the wonderful things that I got up to over half term. But I guess, I’ll just write about them when I’m ready? They’re coming. They are. My mind just isn’t going there right now. It’s playing over here and they’re over there. Lol
Saturday was great! It was SUCH a great day! I checked into YAFTA. I LOVE checking into YAFTA on Saturday. We’re such an ace group of actors. All different. All hard working. All close. But we all get each other. There’s a love. There’s a trust. There’s a magic. We’re smashing it now. We’re working together.
We’re almost like lunatics who cry, laugh, and shout at each other in a grey carpeted room… whilst pretending we’re stranded on a raft? Haha.
But we love it. It’s the best time. Saturday was AMAZING.
Ben (our tutor) got us to ‘play.’ He’s an amazing actor. He looks like ‘Louis Tomlinson.’ He got us to FEEL. He got us to evoke our imaginations again, without any bit of fear.
He took us back to the simple ‘basics’ of it all. He got us to REMEMBER WHY we were there. He opened us up. He PLAYED with us. We were helped and guided us to warmer shores.
That was one of the first times we ALL worked as ‘one’ and created. It was WONDERFUL.
I love Ben, he’s ace. I mean, anytime you’re stood at the top of a dark stairway, about to make an entrance into a scene at around 4pm…literally PISSING YOURSELF with your tutor, is bliss.
We were laughing so hard, that we couldn’t even get our words out! It was all in the name of creation, playing, acting and fun!
It was a moment. A moment that he had created for us all.
Ben: ‘Right…Lol…Play ya Dad….You’ve been lost in the woods FOR DAYS and you have NO CLUE what’s going on? But you’ve ended up on THEIR campsite…..Hahaha. Your objective IS to…Lol….You don’t need an objective. Take a moment, then make your entrance. Lol’
The entire top floor of that building was just FILLED with light & life!!!! It swirled around each of us!!! The rest of the world didn’t matter at that time! It was OUR world!
…it’s always the people that create these moments, that keep everything magical. I love people who have that ability!!! It’s one of the finest abilities, you could ever admire.
I mean, I know tons of people doing jobs they HATE. I’m so happy and so lucky to be around and to be doing the one thing that I LOVE! I always count my blessings…
Like I said…it was a moment!
We all had SO many of these moments, that Saturday. They’re the kinda moments that get *paused* in time and remembered forever. They’re treasured and gathered aren’t they?
I LOVE remembering.
What a great day!
Then ‘Bill’ (who’s real name is Michelle) ruined my career by fixing her ‘Goblin’ dance in my head! She’s like an old school, rockstar, ‘back in the day,’ party girl,’ now grown woman, who loves a vape, thinks men are ‘WEAK’ & collects SKULLS for kicks. She’s wonderful. Haha. I swear she ‘heel clicked’ in the air, yet didn’t know her body could do that!
Geordie Ben: ‘I will admit….that is such a strange *go to* dance.’
Me: ‘The heel/toe has tipped me over the edge. I AM dying! Why am I finding it so funny?’
I was literally crying with laughter. I couldn’t stop. She was SO excited because she’d just bought a creepy puppet for £165, that she had wanted for 3 entire years? (Lord fucking knows? Haha)
Someone told her to dance. I think it was ‘Really good at dabbing’ Monica? I dunno? But she did.
‘Bill’ went for it.
She performed her dance, with her heart on her sleeve, like she was an overly happy, pissed up Goblin, under a dirty, crooked bridge, who had just won the creepy puppet, Goblin lottery.
I was in tears!! I even had to re-glue my eyelashes back on.
Then unfortunately for me, the dance planted in my memory forever….right before I was to do a scene with a lovely, 12year old named ‘Joe’…where in which I was to play his ‘mum’ & be devastated because I had given him up for adoption, when he was 2!!
‘Ffs! All I have is your Goblin dance in my head!!! I can’t stop!’
Saturday was great!
Then all my trains got cancelled, so I had to drink red wine, out of paper cups for a couple hours in a train station. It was actually lovely. Two ‘Northern Rail’ dudes started doing Ballet, cuddling each other and then asked me what I thought?
‘Yeah. Yeah. A bit odd. But of course…beeeautiful!’
I think they’d had enough because every human on Earth (BUT I) was complaining at them. Haha.
Then life went on…