Happy Birthday Mum & Back Ache

Morning all! Ready for work. (Totally working a ‘pinny.‘) And actually managed to rise from my boudoir at some ridiculously early hour, in order to give me more time to groom. (Oh how i adore the grooming process.) I’ve had the worst kind of backache. The kind that’s all throbby and delicious. Infact, sooo delicious that you intend to rip your spine out, even if it does mean you’ll never get to *strut* again! All the way through ‘My Gypsy Wedding’…(which i loved by the way) it was all fine and dandy. My baby must like gypos, or belly dancer bridesmaids? Then as soon as i trolloped to bed, in grey and white leopard print, the achey back thang began….and all through the night dolls! ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT! I’m now at the 8 month pregnant stage, where you’re just waiting. Although i’m patient…this waiting with achey things sucks hairy balls. (Which got me into this fine mess to begin with. Beware of what you nosh on. It will tell you you have beautiful eyes, want to marry you, award you with diamonds…then give you a human inside you belly for almost a year!) I can now even FEEL my little girl all upside down in my belly. I can feel her fingers, toes, head and attitude. I’m already terrified…Yet bizarrely Pete’s not. He’s been merrily gloating and pushing our Mama & Papa’s baby stroller, pram and egg like car seat thingy, (that i fell into, whilst trying to assemble…Mother of the year much,) ALL over the appartment. I don’t think he can possibly wait? I feel like this boobied fleshy parcel of *chub fest,* with pouty lips and whore eyelashes, that’s carrying his Ultimate glory. He’d kick me in the googlies and *shake* me to Ricky Martin, if he thought she would come out faster! (Aww, his kitten is sat in my new Julien Mc’D handbag, posing, with my bronzer brush.)

Anyway, i have another full day at work. I’m actually excited as i have a great deal to tend to and a whole lot of other marlarky to agree to. I have a normal job and a showbizzle job and it really is helping me find that good old Wunna fire once more. I love my ‘fire.’

Today, i’ve decided to hate suck ups. I’ve witnessness a lot in my life and i find it ‘hids.’ There is nothing worst to me than a sucker upper…who’s foolish enough to believe no-one can sight their shame. You do not get anywhere in life, via the fine art of ‘suck up,’ and because it blantantly shows that you do not trust your OWN tremendous ability alone, in order to get where you want to be in life. It shows how much you do not even like yourself and with me being the QUEEN of encouarging others to love, enjoy and celebrate who they are… bruises and all. Good or bad, it doesn’t matter to me. The only thing i enjoy is a raw honesty, dipped in glitter glue. I find ‘fakery’ sooo (taught to me by Paris Hilton)  ‘Hungry Tiger’ and rather hilariously devastating and i due to me growing up in Hollywood…i can see and smell it a mile off! (However, i do enjoy suck ups, if you’re sucking up to ME. 🙂 Therefore please do. I’m an egomaniac. God help me. Even though i’ll know what you’re up to, i’ll hear it anyway because it’s funny…and we all know i enjoy a bit of the old funny bone for lunch.) What i’m saying is, if you GENUINELY admire a being, then that’s perfectly wonderful. If you DON’T, but yet you decide that to ‘brown nose’ for the sake of your own benefit…then you’re a dork. 🙂

Today is my Mummy’s BIRTHDAY!!! I’ve early morning gifted her with choccies, pink bouquets and full body massages. I think it’s the purrfect ‘mummy’ gift. I have one of those mums, that you grow up to really appreciate and well how else can i tell her that i love her. We all need an oily *rub down.* I guess, diamonds would’ve been good to. But she gets that every year…for herself. I’ve been taught to treat myself to the things that i can afford and look after the ones that i love. I personally think it’s ‘hot’ to buy yourself a little blingtastic on your b-day! Delicious! Gimme ice! On the whole, i’m terribly glad that my mum’s survived another year unscathed. The Wunna’s are a hard family to be in charge of, therefore my mama of ‘hoochie’ is quite possibly the best ‘Mama’ in the ENTIRE world. (Loverboy has only just decided to wake up to take me to work…giving him exactly 2 minutes to groom and zero minutes for me to eat. He’s apparently really tired. Hmm..? Yeah it must be really knackering NOT having a human in your BELLY and doing nothing all day. 🙂 )

Anyway, i better go because he’s reading this over my shoulder. I’m expecting some really great phone calls today. My belly hurts! 🙁 Can’t wait for my book!!

Ps/ I’m reading all of your messages and dollies i LOVE YOU TOOO!

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