Good morning my Charlies! Well summer’s definitely over now, isn’t it. I woke up to mist and grey, calm and well grey, but for some reason i’m kind of liking it? It reminds me of having to wake up at the crack of dawn, drag my school uniform off a random radiator, whilst ‘umping and arring’ with glee to the ‘Big Breakfast.’ Great morning telly. I once met a guy in LA who worked on the, ‘Get your knobbley Nuts out,’ part of the show. I think he was over-joyed that someone actually knew what he was on about. They couldn’t repeat the show in America..they just don’t share the same sense of ‘poke and tickle’ as we do. Imagine, taking a camera crew down to some dodgey part of downtown LA, at 7 am, then getting ‘poor fools’ to run down the street bombarding each door with ‘policemen’ knocks, until everyone in the neighbourhood had risen from their bedroom chamber (or pee smelling slum), then convincing some ‘thug like gangsta’ to take off every piece of clothing, and replace it with a pound of bacon, that is to be hung from his genitals, whilst having to run a weaved obstacle course, made up of his fellow neigbours, (homeless tramps) …only to win a ….(hahaha) i can’t even remember?? You know if you can’t even remember what the prize was, it was either a pretty shite prize, or just the ‘amazingly awesomeness,’ outshone the crap ‘holiday for two in Amsterdam,’ or whatever? Yeah, just wouldn’t work over there. Keith Chegwin would get shot in the head, or anally raped…and all before noon. They really would’nt find it funny at all. God, i wish i was a Star!!