So, I finally made it to my weekend off and i’m loving every second of it! 🙂 I’ve worked my pretty booty off, which will make payday bring more than just a smirk of ‘ooh i can get shoes’ on my miserable little facey. Life is dandy. I’m happy because i’m surrounded by a swirl of love, support, babies and just good old luck. (I’ve always been a lucky bleeder, so to speak. I’m one of those kittens that you can launch off a cliff in anger, yet i’ll always land on the only feathery soft spot available, whilst you have to rock climb it down with no rope. 🙂 )
My week has mainly been going to work, loving it…working on my beauty line…loving it…being hit on…(used to it 😉 )….and the babies…(OH HOW I LOVE, THE BABIES.)
Junior’s ace because he’s so giggly and inncoent, yet really growing up fast. His new thing is to wave madly and say ‘HIYA’ at everything and eat giant handfuls of pork fried rice before bed? It’s weird because i don’t think I have ever known or seen a happier baby. He literally finds everything hilarious and has a good time no matter what. As Mummy, it’s super satisfying to see that, especially because he’s unaware of all the drama attached to him that you all sort of know is going on behind the scenes. I’ve tossed all the drama over my shoulder and ‘hit’ positive, simply because I can and well at the end of the day all will be revealed. I have nothing to be concerned about, as so far it’s all gone in favour of Wunnaland.
Keiran had sent me on a mediation in order to gain access to Junior. (I think he’s going around telling a very sorry tale, that makes him look like a victim, or a unrealistic story that makes me look like a bizarre spiteful ex, who wants to hurt him by withholding access.) Not true. I’m not that way inclined. Pete and I have a very smooth and very happy relationship when it comes to Ruby, which proves that I’m not of that manner. He’d even vouch for that. This is all a lot more serious that he had even mentioned to his close ones, to the point where his request for Junior was THROWN OUT of mediation by the family law specialists themselves, in favour of Wunna land and my concerns. (He gets the letter next week.) They even told me that i didn’t even have to attend mediation if I didn’t wish to, as he would have to appeal to court now in order to get what he wants. It’s a long and pricey process for him. Yet, this is what he wanted, as he couldn’t’ find it in himself to actually swallow his pride, do a lunch and discuss it all out appropriately. And i know that he’ll be worried, concerned and scared, as it’s all gone a lot further than he expected it too, as before he was all ‘cocky-cocky’ and almost laughing at me, whilst verbally abusing me because he thought that i would be terrified by the whole mediation/court thing. Now that he’s losing and the authorities aren’t probably going to work in his favour…he’s not so cocky anymore, which stresses him out, especially after what he’s probably told everyone because once in court…it will ALL COME OUT and that must be a bit scary for him. 🙂 I mean, on my Facebook page the other day, when I had placed a status up, stating that he wished not to attend Junior’s first birthday celebrations. (I find that annoying because he used to moan on about how much he misses him, yet when he is invited to see him, he doesn’t want to. In fact, for the first months of Junior’s existance, when he had full access, he couldn’t be bothered to spend time with him, because partying was so much more important. Now that he can’t…he wants it more than ever. Very telling. But yes, about the Facebook status, a couple of people had a a few bits to say…and everyone’s entitled to their ‘few bits’ in my mind. Yet i did notice that a couple of his younger sisters made comments, one at me and the other at a close school friend of mine…and it was sort of quite upsetting, because he had made them look so silly without them even knowing and all because they didn’t know the truth. That in my family…counts as bad form. All the people on my end who know about everything that happened during the relationship, sort of cringed at it with a empathy , with a ‘poor things…:(…he hasn’t even told them the truth has he?’ I’d never let my brother stick up for me, if he didn’t know the full story and it could end up embarrassing him in any way.
Yet, just so you all do know…right now he has no contact with Junior (his request was even denied via the mediators) and i don’t know why he’s moaning because he actually agreed on that with a ‘Perfect..thanks’ text, where in which it was stated that until mediation and court was over, he wouldn’t be able to do much about it. He was okay with that. I knew Junior had a milestone birthday coming up. I didn’t think he’d want to miss it, as I knew that the dates wouldn’t coincide with his contact, so I invited him, as that would be the most Honorable approach. Pointless effort to bridge build really, as he he turned it down and it’s things like that that are upsetting simply because he can make it to piss up’s with friends, boys holidays….more getting trashed with friends…but not his son’s birthday. That he ever so ‘misses more than anything.’ He doesn’t even have a full no contact rule forced upon him. As he is entitled to supervised access if he simply commits to three things..not difficult things either…it’s only random drug testing…counselling….and paying child maintenance, which he didn’t think to do for 8 months. However, now that things have got a bit more serious,) he’s willing to give Junior £100 a month…so i’m waiting on that, which is at least one positive step forward. (Even though it’s quite basic. I mean Junior’s monthly fee alone is £835 and that’s before anything else that is categorized as normal living maintenance,nappies, milk, clothing, home…etc) So as you can see, its makes no difference, but like I said, once i get it i’ll be grateful that he has shown some kind of commitment to the welfare of his child. £100 is nothing to me, i mean that gets spent alone on dinner! Lol. Yet, It’s a good thing because it’s a step closer to showing commitment and stability and it makes me a a third of the way happier. Just two more things on the list, if that comes through as promised. SO THERE! It’s not anything to do with the whole spiteful wife thing, wanting to hurt him(i’m not chav) and more about giving my son what he DESERVES in and from a father. (I’m a great mummy.) When he spent his nights partying away, I spent those exact same nights nurturing, loving, guiding, caring, cuddling and teaching my children love and life. My parents did that with me. I do the same for my babies. This has gone quite far and well i guess you don’t mess with the a mother, when the love of her child is the motive of the whole war. He wasn’t even around after 3 months of Junior being born. He doesn’t get trophies for parenting. I mean if i told you what the first thing he said to Junior, still in the labour room when he had just been born, you’d be disgusted. They were the first words that left his mouth onto my son’s ears and I’ll never forget them. He needs to clear up his childhood issues and after that, he’ll be a good father, rather than just a ‘good father’ for show. Anyone can be a good father for a couple hours a week in front of people. The funny thing is that all this could’ve been easily diluted and worked out amicably, if he simply apologised, met over a lunch and discussed appropriately, without being aggressive or verbally abusive. I mean LOOK AT PETE AND I. We do this whole situation AMAZINGLY. But he’s going to have to back down his pride soon, as court isn’t going to be fun for him nor it is going to work in his favour. In his heart…he knows that.
However, on a more chipper note, I’m calm. I’m happy. And loving every minute of being with my little baby family. I’m the luckiest girl ever! 🙂 🙂 🙂 Work is good, family life is good, everything else has slotted into place nicely.
Like I said, I’ve had phone numbers left on coffee cups for me, i’ve had suited gents purchase my grocery shopping for me, as a gesture of good will? I have friends wishing to set me up with their friends, and a guy who left a note on my car windscreen asking me on a date. I’ve had a gentleman deciding to watch me mop? Some rich, some poor, some flashy, some down to earth. I’ve always stated that i’m rubbish when there’s a lot of choices and i tend to pay no attention to them and just smile. I’m flattered by it all because it picks you up and plonks that extra skip in your strut, doesn’t it?
I’m working super hard and well the right things just come to you. Good things happen to good people. 🙂 I say it a lot and well..it’s true. 😉