Feed me to the Lions

Okay so it’s Friday, so much has happened since my last blog. I’ve been far too ‘funned’ up and tragic to beable to report my news,but i’m going to deliciously attempt to now…hungover…and well because that’s what i do! (I just got a inbox truck load of fan mail…that oodly was all GREAT, but there’s always one little ‘party pooper’-which is what i’m going to refer to my lovely ‘haters’ as from now on… who just needs a cuddle, i’nt there! Haha.. He wants to know why i feel the need to blog every single little thing about my life, because no-one is bothered. The answer to that: Because i’m an awful, infact dreadful human being, who needs to get fed to the lions, then beaten with tickle sticks and taught right from wrong.) Lets all not fight. Lets be shirtless and dance to ‘s club 7’ until we finally see the good in all criminal activity.

Okay, so the good thing about being Chrissie Wunna and saying you like boys, with a bit of banter a float, is that immediately, you will meet a series of boys, all starry eyed, with their hearts thumping through their chest, and their willies all  ‘a throb’ and upright…who will attempt to ‘BANTER’ you into submission. Not last night, but the night before, i had the most delicious amount of sarcastic evil banter, with all kinds of males trying to score a wink with the Wunna. I’m impressed! Yet then they always fail, as their ‘trouser snake’ gets the better of them, and before you know it, the banter has vanished and we’re back onto a dirty conversation about my tits! One guy told me (quite cockily) that ‘Beauty fades after about 10 mins,’ so i might be externally hot, but it’s what’s on the inside that matters. However, he said, it in a way that was almost like HE was the hot one with the boobies, and I was some poor ‘all talk’ young gentleman. Therefore i merely replied with a ‘My inside is horrid! And your initials don’t seem to begin with A.A’ (Facebook- oh Facebook-  had told me, that my new crushe’s initials would be ‘A.A.’ which i believed was simply Gods way of saying…’Fuck the love quiz you bitch, and get yourself to Alcoholics Anonymous!’ I love meetings! Do they drink there? Anyway, long story short..he ended up wanting to give me his number. (I roll my eyes.) I told him he didn’t have to…i’d guess the numbers!! (HAHAHAHA.)

I then got a stream of text messages from the darling Billi Bhatti, in the hours of ‘Booty,’ who simply claimed to be ‘confused by me,’ at 1.24am. Lol. I can’t tell you why, and i really can’t remember why? But yeah, he’s a great guy, when drunk. Very smart..speaks his mind. I like that in people. I don’t enjoy the company of a coward, or someone who can’t seem to find an opinion. No-one can tell you your opinion is wrong, because you’re allowed to think anything, of anyone, at anytime. I’m creating monsters around the world! But i’m loving it, as i’m encouraging people to have more fun, be daring, and bold. Live their life the way they always wanted to, regardless as to what others may think. The odder you are, the better. Do not conform to structure. Make your own rules. Play! Be happy.

Everyone always asks me why, i’m so happy all the time? How do i stay so positive and have the strength to forgive? Well let me tell you. Life ain’t as bad as you all think really is it?? You all have the ‘HAPPY’ in you…I’m just here to remind you of it. I said this to a fan in Canada…who is LOVELY, might i add…and has great taste in people. I think she suggested i become a ‘Life Coach.’ Now lets not get carried away…hahahha…i’m not that great at ‘Life.’ LOL. I cried last night, at myself in a mirror because I was drunk and missed ‘Mikey.’ Woohoo!

I’m doing a blogathon today, as a catch up…expect 3 after each other!!

Random Wunna story: Christina Wunna once almost got arrested in Manchester for running up to a chinese lady, and her heated egg roll cart at 2am whilst drunk, screaming ‘Mama, Mama- love me, love me.’ Wunna then decides to aid her new found Mother, by standing by her side and handing out egg rolls to beings, whilst stating they could enjoy an ‘Egg roll & a Happy Ending.’ The police were called.


4 thoughts on “Feed me to the Lions”

  1. god ure jst one amazing person and i adore u to bits,,, jst the way u r makes one fall in love with ya,,, keeeep it up hope u do well in life n get where u want,,,
    xxxx ure number one fan,,

  2. Wat can I say Hun, love Reading your blogs and following ya… All ya fans I’ve spoken to love you too bits, u sure are a special woman,,,, god can’t wait to meet u one day my self,,,


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