False Start

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What a morning!! I’ve been mentally busy, meaning that I haven’t had time to sitty down and blog. Napping changing, schedules, love, mummy hood and work seem to be my current juggle and well i’ve never been one to really appreciate the art of juggling. In my mind it’s for clowns. 🙂 And i’m a clown with boobs, meaning people do things for me. 🙂 *Wiggle-Giggle-Shoots custard pies out of her nipples.*

But yes. Lots going on! Lots to be delighted about and lots to be concerned about. Woke up at 5.03am this morning, after being up for most of the night with Baby Junior. (He didn’t fancy snoozing last night. He just wasn’t feeling it.)  Got up at 5am. Got ready. Whopped on a pinstriped shirt. Did my face. curled my hair. Chattered about the events of the day with ‘now awake’ husband, giggled at Junior, woke Ruby up early, got her dressed for nursery, We all set off. Exchanged children from my car to Husbands van. They waited with him until the day turned 7.45am. I had already dashed off to make a very important meeting, in a ‘bit of a distance’ town. Drive all the way there. Beat all the morning  traffic. Swore at dodgy dangerous drivers. (At one point there were headlights that had chosen to drive in the incorrect direction and on the incorrect side of the road headed straight towards me.) Felt over the moon at the fact that I had simply made good time, even though I could’ve got killed. Pull up. Make a phone call. Get t the appointment. Rush in, so that I’m not late and *BOOM* it gets postponed until next week. 🙂

That’s just my luck!

It’s just classic ‘What happens to Wunna’ stuff. I mean, you can’t really help it when things of that sort occur. I laughed it off with a ‘see you next week.’ I really didn’t mind too much. What can you do? It’s funny. However, I cannot believe that I actually woke up at 5am!

The going there was much easier then the going back. On the way back and hit that early morning work rush and boy was that shitty. On the positive…good calf workout though. They fricking killed by the end of it. In fact I was soo stuck in traffic that I even had time to ponder through a Heat magazine and read up about Paris and her Ibiza residency and Khloe Kardashian and her now druggie Lamar. It’s sad when you sort of see or know of someone who is portrayed in such a positive light…like ‘Lamar’ is on the show. I mean, he’s meant to be a good kid, who’s done well, without a father, or good upbringing..he knows how to love, he’s kind, he’s honorable. Then you find out that that’s only in the ‘fairytale telly’ version.’The real version has a cocaine addiction, a party addiction and a sleeping with other women addition. It’s crazy really innit. I don’t like it when people portray themselves as squeaky clean, when they’re not. However, I seem to not mind people who do it the other way around, y’know actually be a really great person, yet portray themselves as an idiot. Yet that’s obviously because their core is of goodness. Poor Khloe Kardash. I mean, she seemed so obsessed with him tooo. However, now i guess they’ll be headed to the divorce courts. Who’d a thought Scott Disick would’ve turned out to be the good guy, the daddy, the obedient husband and Lamar would be the loser? Role reversals! Yee haa!

However, i’m not going to be too harsh on ‘Lamar’ as of course, what I know about Losers, is the simple fact that their usual mistake making stems from something much deeper, that once caused them pain. So yeah, he’s fucking up, grew up in the ‘most best’ environment, now in a flurry of party and drug taking, letting his good wife down and everything in between…but I’ve just read his Twitter and this is what the poor man said out loud..

‘Won’t continue 2 speak on this but I have got 2 let this out real quick. I have let this man and many others get away with a lot of shit. He wasn’t there 2 raise me. He was absent ALL of my life due to his own demons. My mother and grandmother raised me. Queens raised me. For the first time since they left, came a blessing of a FAMILY that I married into. FAMILY. That man wasn’t even invited to my wedding. He has never met my mother in law and some of my other family. How can a man who has NOT once called me to check on my well being have the nerve to talk so recklessly about his own “son”. He is my downfall! His own demons may be the ONLY thing he gave 2 me. He disrespecting the ONLY FAMILY that has loved me without expecting anything in return. They are the ONLY ones that have been here consistently 4 me during this dark time. Only person 2 blame is myself. Say what you want about me but leave the ones who have done nothing but protect and love me out of this! This goes to out to everyone!’

So, I guess the absence of his father has truly affected him and the comfort of his new family in law has been a blessing and a joy. He’s ventured on a bender due to the pain of all that is going on and also the ‘trying to have a baby’ and the ‘oh my Dads decided to make an appearance’ thing has  re-triggered off a bounty of not very fun memories, which we all try and deal with in our very own special way.

…………………………….

Enough of that!

I’m back home now because Junior has his injections later on today. 🙁 Poor thing. I’m still in work clothes, but with an updo and a much needed coffee. I’ve managed to tidy around and get things back to normal before Ruby gets home and destroys it al. 🙂 I adore my little girl because she’s my number 1 chica.

Saying that, last night my mum and dad pooped around for a ‘hello,’ and to see the children. I don’t know what happened, but after I had redyed my highlights (i got these awful highlights yesterday I just wanted little bits of brown streaks, underneath here and there. Ended up with the whole top of my head BLOND. It was awful and I looked like I did Asian blow job porn. I immediately dyed it back to classic black and I feel so much more darling for it. I don’t know what possessed me to do such a thing. But you all need to start telling me how amazing my hair actually is so I never ever do it again! When people think they’re beautiful, they don’t really ‘play’ with their look. I must’ve been having an insecure hair day. 🙂 I’m back to me now though and i’m loving it.

But yes, made steak for tea…all the blah, blahs. My mum, dad, hubby and the children were home and at around 8pm my mum gets mad at a comment that’s been made, (well I assume it was a comment) and storms out, with my little Burmese daddy in tow.

In our family, we adore the children. ADORE THEM. However, I always believe Junior will be alright and that Ruby has been put through far too many transitions for a 2 year already. So my heart always over protects her, which is also mirrored through my mum. We’re great mums. We’re always poking out our wings of protection. Ruby is only two, yet extremely bright for her age and especially when it comes to knowing what’s going on around her and it’s often foolish of adults to believe otherwise. I mean, you hear so many grownups say ‘oh he/she won’t know…she’ s only two,’ but how wrong…they DO KNOW! It’s crazy how much they observe. Even nursery explains that to me all the time.

All is well, but today hasn’t quite gone to plan. I’m exhausted i’ll tell you that and i still have  luncheons, nursery runs, injections and all sorts to champion and all of it in heels and pinstripes.

Nap needed.

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