Face on/Face off

Morning my delicious munches of moo-factory. I’m groomed. I’m rocking my Hollywood maine of ‘ooh laa’ and i’m in red, moderately prepped and ready for a long day at work. I think i’ve also lost my voice a little, due to the utter shittness of our weather. Hot/Cold. Hot/Cold. It’s like a twisted heart-breaking relationship. If i miss anything about my Hollywood years, it really is the weather. Kinda made sinning, heart ache and laughter…more ‘Disney.’ Yet probably because I was in better lighting. (I’m randomly reading a ‘in blue biro’ sign, written by Loverboy claiming that others must ‘NOT PARK’ in his space. Aww…even his handwritten notes are angry. Already this morning he’s attemtpted to make me work out, when i pondered for sympathy with a ‘oooh my back hurts, i’m an oldie.‘ Instead of a romantic, ‘i’ll make everything better’ approach. He went with…‘Well you should WORK OUT more.’ Eww! I mean, it’s not as if i complaining about his poor afro comb-over attempt, to the masses…online…for the entire world to read. 🙂 He’s now doomed. *Wiggle-giggle* I think he’s looking forward to Friday where he may get a bit of sweet loving. However, i’m totterting off to my friends bit of birthday. Therefore, his willy will have to wait. Ah-dee-dums. I swear my hair smells like cats?)

I’ve been up all night with Ruby. For some reason she’s really not enjoying bad dreams right now. I think she sleeps peacefully than remembers that i’m her mother, which brings her to tears and makes her need to yank my weave out aggressively. I think she’s also confused by ‘Mummy with her face on’ and ‘Mummy with her face off.’ It’s like a whorey ‘Karate Kid’ technique. Ruby really does think we’re two different people and quite aptly, doesn’t like ‘Face off’ Mummy. That Mummy gets the word ‘Oh?’ Before the tears! Woohoo! (This is all sounding quite mentally ill now. lol.)

Whatelse? (Apart from needing coffee and being over my diet because broedom got the better of me. Life is about living and yeah that is what loesrs like me say, when we can’t lose the weight. :)) Oh yeah, ‘Latin Lover’ is moaning at me from Hungary, via email. I thought i had gotten rid of his moaning. However, it seems you never really ever do, when exes come into play. I can’t even think about it. I had to sleep in the back of a Ford Taurus, with a pitbull and some cheap vodka because of him. 🙂  I cannot at all believe my fairytale.

I’ve got a banging headache today and i think i really just need another massage. I’ve become addicted to them and well in my mind that is my workout. I also need to find a good psychic? I’m in the mood for a bit of spirtiual guidance. Then i can blame my life on the stars and keep my fingers crosesd for a happy ending.

Have a WUNNAFUL day dollies.

I love you. x

[Me on the telly…looking like i really could attempt to dress Paris Hilton.]

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