Look how not very excited a bunch of people are an hour before they intend to see me. It’s brilliant. They’re all just twiddling their thumbs and pulling faces like they’ve been literally FORCED to be there! I LOVE IT!! I actually took this picture myself via the fine art of bobbing down behind a crowd of people facing those people… incognito, sticking my arm up and quickly taking a ‘snippety snap.’ I mean you could crack a bloody smile, you miserable little sods. LOL
Had a busy day today. I made a guest appearance (as you can see…they did brighten up, mulitply like gremlins and go a little insane…which i adore because i’m a whore for attention.) I held almost 3 meetings over the phone for the other ‘stuffs’ i’m dabbling with and i wrote a bit of my book. I also had a lady talk to me like i was 5 years old today. She had some random cheesy ‘Childrens TV presenter’ voice and kept explaining things to me with over animated jaw movements and very big eyes. I simply looked at her like she was ‘weird’ and swore a lot in order to upset her. There was no upsetting her. She’s one of those ‘pretends to be overly happy’ people who goes home and cries into the palms of her lonely hands. She honestly looked and sounded like she had just snorted 10 mounds of cocaine and she was in charge of introducing Me. I asked for a ‘Drunk’…not a ‘Druggie’ disguised as a school teacher. I’ve always wanted some homeless drunk bum of an embarrassment (who i would think was amazing) to stumble onto the platform, scratch his balls, piss all over everything and do a massive ‘Intro’ for Me!! They NEVER let that happen. Selfish Bastards! Lol. Life is good. I just want things to be MY WAY goddamit! At least i get away with being bad. I even get applauded for it. IN YOUR FACE!
Other than that nothing else happened but the salsa dance remix version of ‘Vindaloo’ playing outside a 99p store, which made me shimmie around the ‘giving out lollipops for free’ guy. I contemplated fake fainting in a packed Post office simply to get attention. I was a wanker by a banker. I did a pre-recorded interview for Burma. I bought a computer for no reason other than the sales guy was sooo fucking dreamy. I stocked up on fake tan and eyelashes and i couldn’t find a Glamour Puss/Trucker cap ANYWHERE!!! Boring really…
This Hoochie is on her way to the top or the very bottom. Keep it sexy bitches.