Wow! Well, let me tell you what really happened! (And this is gonna be a bit shit, because as i’m writing this, i’m totally listenning to ‘Soldier’ by Destiny’s child…so i’m half thinking about penis.)
I mean the episode was good, fluffy-ish, and well about as normal as ITV could make it, in regards to what was really going on in the house! We all looked DOG ROUGH though!! I mean honestly, every single one of us looked like we had weight problems and faces like bulldogs arses. We looked like fat lesbians…and not the good kind. (Is there a good kind??) I’m gonna blame the lighting, as it’s the easiest thing to blame, but really i just remember being extremely EXHAUSTED!! We we’re working (filming) almost 16-20 hour days, on 4 hours sleep. My body was basically running on champers, my mind was fucked and i really don’t know how i was even managing to get up and function, let alone flirt with Callum Best. It was a difficult time in the house, and well…although still fun…lots and lots of it was deliberately thrown on the cutting room floor.
So Kat and Emma. They fought like bitches on crack! And i mean fought to the point where, we were all seperated into different rooms, (i was in a room with Sam and Flic, playing Connect 4) filming had to come to a stop, appointments with shrinks had to be made and our serious opinions on matters had to be analysed for judgement. I was on Team Kat!! Even though you would never have thought it from what u saw. And let me tell you, Emma is not some little innocent ‘why doesn’t anyone like me’ girly…she can be EVIL!! She spent the whole night making some big weepy deal about Kat going on about how she didn’t like her, (which isn’t a big deal to me…as we were encouraged not to like each other) and was refusing to be a part of the house (or something like that, i dunno? I stayed out of it) unless Kat was removed, because she apparently feared for her life….and sewing scissors!! LOL
I’m not quite sure how someone telling you they don’t like you, would make you fear for your own tragic life, but ‘Miss.Beard’ played it well, knew fighting with Kat would get her some extra attention and was terrfied of Kat. When i say ‘terrifed of Kat’ i don’t mean ‘ooh she’s going to kill me’ terrified (even though she kinda insinuated that)…it was more ‘terrifed’ over the fact that Kat could see straight through her and openly outted her on her desperation and fame hungryness. Emma, is great at turning it on and off for the cameras. She’s one to use the correct people at the correct time, stab them in the back if she has too, and do whatever it takes to become famous and spends most of her time with her head wedged up the right peoples arses!! Now, don’t get me wrong, i don’t think theres too much wrong with her or anyone wanting to be successful, famous, or whatever else. I like that about her. She’s very driven and knows what she wants and how to get it!! Thats sexy. Yet, it was just the way she was soooo transparent, and sooo obvious, soooo sucky uppy and sooo adamant that she wasn’t in it to promote her music career (when no-one was even asking her about it or even cared)…that made me want to gip up a little…well a lot really and maybe a bit into her own mouth!! It’s hard to describe. You had to really be in the house to feel everyones pain. LOL. Basically, she played very nicey nicey, when underneath it all she was evil and in my mind, hid behind Carrie. Kinda used her as a front. Everyone else played who they really were.
However, luckily for EM’s, she’s not portrayed in that light…i mean in the show she’s quite sweet and boring, right? Not really an ‘impact’ characater. A snooze fest. But believe me, she drove EVERYONE in the house INSANE, with her constantly every other second going on about her annoying ‘Girls Aloud story’…blah, blah, blah. (We we’re all like, yes we know already, you want to sing…now SHUT UP. You’re NOT Cheryl Cole and obviously auditioned for the WRONG show!!) It became a running joke in the house and exhausting. It became soo obvious she was using the show and i guess Kat (who can be a bitch at times, yet honest and not afraid to speak her mind) couldn’t take it anymore so OUTTED her, infront of everyone!! Making Emma feel exposed, insecure and having to pretend that Kat was a ‘crazy’ and threatenning her and all sorts of other lovely rubbish, in order to get herself further along the in the competition.. I don’t know what went on?? I just know, none of it was shown and i’m not sure why, as it sure as hell was all that was going on at that time, and i kinda felt it wasn’t fair on the rest of us, as to me, it felt like the whole show, the fun, the experience, had come to an END. We all had to spend the majoirty of the time sitting around, sorting out their personal problems. ..which is definitely not what i was there to do. HAHAHAH.
On a good note, my boobs looked ace in that ‘couldn’t breathe to save my life in it’ Devils outfit.