I’ve got a banging headache, after a Tropical VK, a double Baileys, a pint that i surprisingly got soooo drunk on and a quiz at the Counting House last night! (I didn’t really drink too much, but the combination of the pint and Snoops ‘Drop it like it’s hot’ song just seemed to slip me into a bit of a tipseroo!) I loved it! I was so bored all day, therefore decided to make my own fun, which is what i suggest you guys do. You know when you just can’t be arse…BE ARSED, don’t let ur life slip away from you. Before you know it you’ll be a used up old hag of a minger. You’ve got to create your own fun in times when watching paint dry is the only thing on the menu. …even if you have to resort to stealing, bullying or being a basic nuisance. I did a quiz, i tragically hip/hop danced around, i saw Hulk (Pat Donaldson) Hogan, watched drunks take part in a Frazzles/Cadbury creme egg eating competition, (it was disgusting) talked about shagging minors, learnt a bit of cockney rhyming slang and got called a ‘Dirty Slag.’ Good night on the whole! Beer under the stars with good friends…who are racist!
When i got home, i felt quite drunky…this is dangerous as i’m usually quite adventurous sober, therefore when drunk i foolishly believe i’m 6 feet tall and the funniest person on the planet. I remember being in my kitchen, wiggling around like a drunk Pussycat Doll to the tunes playing in my head, tripping into a stool, stuffing a mini chocolate muffin in my face, then pulling down my top, getting out my (looked really big) boobies, taking a picture of them twice (like ya do) and text message sending them to a boy (who had in that time BBM’ed me from Spain telling me how much he wanted me.) Oh my god!! At the time i thought it was funny…(Note: The nudie tit picture wasn’t about being a slag, or dirty. It was more for random comedic value.) This doesn’t ever work when sending them to a boy. Boys see boobies and it’s all about sex…regardless. I woke up this morning, hair a mess, randomly staring at my phone with a face of sheer horror and a ‘oh no i didn’t, did i?’ But yeah i did, so i text the boy this morning, who is now in love with me…and his response quite luckily was ‘Hahahahaa!’ Then i accused him of taking advantage of my sweet yet rather drunken nature. I thought i’d commited to growing up…yet i guess not so much, hah? I’ve forgiven myself for last night, so you should too. It’s filed under ‘Good Times.’ Thank God i stopped at the boobies pix, as really if i wasn’t so tired from all the beer it would’ve gone a lot further! I always take things too far. I put my arse on the line all the time, just to see how far i can push something. Don’t know why i bother really? It’s so ‘rebel without a cause’….yet i’m sure there’s a cause in there somewhere? God i’m a slut! Grow up Wunna!!! I love my boobies! They’re really doing me proud! They’re turning men into soppy messes. Worth every penny! (I currently have some disgusting pig of a human, eating a kebab in my ear! I hate people who make ‘slop’ noises when they eat!)