I’m wanting to move back onto northern soil and after a few chitty chats with people who are able to chat with the Ultimate ‘Puss of Glamour What What’ in an open and honest manner…i’ve decided that i want to make the move. I can pretty much work from anywhere really, especially now. I can move around freely. If i look back at every location i’ve ever lived in, the only two soils i can feel at *peace* at, are in the North and in Los Angeles. I love London..more to work in and to visit. Yet it’s like New York for Me…not my dream, not a place where i want to stay forever. I feel like i’ve done most of it and in a very short space of time. The best of it, the worst of it…been treated like a Queen…i have, i have. I’ve loved it and i do find it beneficial, there’s jiggery pokery around every corner. However at the same time, it drives me insane. I find it cold and depressing at times and funnily enough, i don’t like that feeling. Infact, it even makes me feel lonely…which is weird because i’m always always surrounded by people and even when i’m not, i have pretty great conversations with myself?? I’m the girl that the good good people of ‘ooh laa’ want to hang out with all of the time for fun and frolocks. Yet that is what London is to Me. Fun and Frolocks…which although marvellous….isn’t a home. It’s a party and when i have *pauses* in London…i’m bored….which gets me into trouble.
I don’t even find it a big career place. I mean people always say: ‘What about work? What about work?‘ But really i got on the ‘Hilton’ show from my Mothers living room in Pontefract. Growing up in Hollywood, (the entertainment capital,) is the only real place worth moving to to make the big time for Me now. (And i’ll get to back to that!) I’ve seen it all and experienced it all to a large degree. However, right now i’m ready for a new chapter of my life, therefore i’m sorting it out. I’ve spoken to all the people i need to and well i’m excited! I wanna make a northern move to Leeds and come play and work in London whenever duty calls. Easy! I mean, i’m gonna eventually start flying out to LA for work whenever i need to, therefore i can do ‘work’ from anywhere. I need stability, a HOME-like feeling and Leeds is a GREAT city. Hot boys, good party scene, northern spirit….It’s the best of both worlds for Me! I can sort of do the ‘fun fun’ and settle down!!!
I did actually have a ‘someone’ stop me today and say ‘whenever you make a hasty decision, or move somewhere new, it’s usually because you’re feeling low, or you’re cutting away from something…is anything the matter?’ I just kinda looked and thought, ‘it’s not that deep and completely about what i want in life right now.’ I’m happy. I’ve moved around a lot. It’s a great way to experience life! It’s part of being Chrissie Wunna. I can go to any city and find the ‘fun’ in it. I just did London too quickly, and in the best heels, to the point where i’m now like ‘Whats left for me to smear a little Wunna on??’
On a different note, i do enjoy the idea of moving to different cities, towns, worlds, and blogging my ‘new’ life from the core of them. I’ve done it all over and it humours me. I’ve blogged from my place in Hollywood. I’ve blogged from my appartment in Camden. I’ve blogged from basements in New York and i’ve blogged from hotel rooms ALL over the world. It’s magical. I’ve told my story of love, life and career. The ups, the downs, the fun and the fight. However, although i’m young at heart and the most sexiest of nuisances…i’m growing up and i’ve watched my priorities, choices, tastes and emotions change over time and inconjucntion with my environment. I’m loving it. I’m loving the story of my life. Yet, now i’m needing stability! It’s a complete change for me!
My reason for this is also because i’m once again London bound on Tuesday night, in order to be at a 10.45am meeting in Victoria. The meeting i’m excited about. I can’t actually wait. I love London for the meetings and the bustle when it comes to getting down to business. However, the sheer thought of having to return to London was making me feel literally sick (i’m sick now and for no reason.) I’m sort of sad, a bit stressed but more importantly UNHAPPY. Now, i’m a happy girl and it’s so important for me to block out negativity and having experienced this ‘living’ thing, i’ve noticed that you can only GET AHEAD in life, when you are 100% happy and in a home environment where you feel nothing but pure content. I’ve lived both. The good and the bad..so i know what’s right for me and i’m a determind girl. I have a one track mind. If i want it. I want it. If i’m doing it. I’m doing it!! I’m unstoppable.
But yeah, i’ll bet back in London late Tuesday night. I’ll have an early night, where i’ll feel alone. I’ll get up early to go to my meeting and NAIL it. (*wink-pout*) Then i have the rest of the whole day for fun, frolock, drinking, play and catch up. (I might even clean my appartment.) I hate going back to my appartment, if i’ve left it a mess. It reminds me of a rather drunken ‘last time i was out.’ It’s like looking at your past and sighing! Haha. Anyway, Wednesday evening, i’ll be leaving to come back up north. I could actually stay…i mean i would for work..yet people haven’t really confirmed in due time, so i can just shoot up north. I’ll be in London for a day. Lol. I’m even dreading Tuesday night. I don’t even know why?? I’m really dreading it. But i’ll be fine, i have an eye test that i have to do sober at 2.45pm, then i’ll have wine, get on the train and jolly on down to London a bit pissed. 🙂 Once i’m there i’ll be fine!
Nothing i can do right now but wait, because i am contracted to be in London. However, something tells me, with a bit of jiggery pokery…i’ll be in Leeds in no time. 😉 I will tell you something that ‘Lashes’ (Oh ‘Lashes’) noticed. Firstly know that ‘Lashes’ is the only boy to have regularly stayed at my appartment, until we decided to do the ‘not talking ever again’ thing. Anyway, he noticed from DAY 1 (and he was there Day 1) that i NEVER unpacked my suitcases. He claimed it was because i subconciously knew i did not truely want to call it ‘home.‘ Infact, two of them are still not unpacked. He would always try and make me unpack the lot, even time he swaggered over. I love London. I love it. It’s just not my ‘home.’ There’s more for me yet….