Y’see, the good thing about me is that i’m ‘Sheerah.’ Even when I think that I can’t handle a bit of ‘boomerang,’ I always make the right choices, waddle back up on that pony and YEEHAA my way to victory. (It may take me a moment…and yeah, maybe i’ll be a little bruised,) but i’ll always find my inner lioness and the turnover time that it takes me to grow tall is now MINUTES! (You can clap here if you want.) The fact that i can do it in minutes doesn’t mean I’m Rainbow Bright and more means, i’ve been through some ‘times.’ 🙂
On the whole, I know that I have it much greater than a lot of other people, who may not be so fortunate on this disco earth ball of fun time.. My support system, my family, my children, my zest for life, my will to win, my own jolly little heart of fire make me see straight and get up every time, in heels, and with a smile that can hide a mild attitude problem, but not anything rum can’t fix. This makes me a great human and in times like this…be you a girl or a guy, more of you need to adopt this manner and GALLOP WITH ME. There’s a goal I need to get to by the end of this life and i’m on route…in heels, often hiccuping…but with ‘Sheerah’ strength.
So, as I was moaning last night about how all things seemed to be going wrong for me this year…I threw my pity party, i laughed it off, I had a baby sized weep, I pulled a few faces, took it out on my Mother (like ya do 🙂 )…told the people closes to me and as I woke up this morning….there was a dodgy few moments, where I still felt a bit sorry for myself and THEN IT HAPPENED…i scooped up my suit of Gladiator armour and plonked it right on with a ‘gun show.’
It’s only February…and 2014 has been shit to be so far. 🙂 So rubbish that it is now making me laugh. Duvet this year my arse. I’m whipping 2014 right back with glitter bricks and a smile. It’s not the fact that i’ll fight it from getting me down..it’s the simple fact that I know my worth, my talent, my strength and what matters and with a wiggle-giggle, because i am filled with love…i’m going to champion it. It;s been eye opening because last night I learnt a lot. I GOT why people maybe surrender to ‘party’ mode, sulk mode, anger mode, weep mode, wine mode, credit card mode…whichever mode you care to pick off the Butlers’ tray, to maybe forget your merry problems and feel a bit less lost for a second. I get it now. Yet i’m not that. Positive action is what makes things go right. Pity parties or a swirl of escapism, whilst you take it out on everyone else…(usually the people who care) doesn’t work, does it? I’m not weak. I’m grabbing my faux fur…yeah after a moan and a weep..that’s allowed to happen…as long as you snap out of it and start working your strut.
I’m emotionally on top of things, a great deal more than people think, with trophies and everything. That’s what makes me lucky. (Still lost my voice and can’t turn my neck though. Yippee.) So, i’m going to tell you a story and it’s my 2014 so flipping FAR…
Okay, so lets play ‘real.’ 2014 turned in…The great thing was that I was with my family and children. Junior’s first bringing in of the New Year.
The bad thing was that I was pregnant and didn’t know. So skipping over all that…
I came into 2014 pregnant…with heavy marital problems…and 2013 literally spitting me out. I had..well still have, GREAT things happening, like the beauty line, I did The Clothes Show live, I delighted Christmas in the luxury forest log cabin….
But my parents flew away to Burma for 3 weeks…there I was on my own with the two children…with all this great opportunity that I was so happy about, as I had gone through such a rollercoaster of a time in my personal life…
Yet I was miscarrying. (You don’t need to ‘aww’ here. I’m just streaming you the facts of Wunna land, so you et it and don’t think i’m a crazy.)
So we’re only in Feb…fair enough it’s almost March and i’m alone with the babies, with a break down of love and romance…i’m having a fighty time…and a miscarriage…at the same time as working hard on my eyelash line and being excited…waving my flag of positivity..and then i’m in and out of hospital with my own sorry self and my poorly son…to THEN all of a sudden find out that i’m having to have my neck cut open, to have some giant lump removed from it immediately, so that i don’t die early. UGH! Surgery happened. Didn’t it.
Inbetween all this is humour, weddings, children’s birthday parties, fights, moments of love, good friends and…well you might as well have called the Circus and told them to come and watch MY LIFE instead. Lol
Okay, so just as I was telling you how all was now well…i’m recovering and things were getting back into order, meaning I could now CONCENTRATE on the money making passion that is my LASH LINE and not have to put up with basic Wunna ongoings…y’know the surprises. I don’t like surprises. I don’t like to be shocked. I’m one who enjoys stability and well whenever i’m shocked, it’s never usually something good, so now i obviously fear it with all of my life. Hahaha. I want to *whack* it with kippers and run away. Once i’m over the *shock* phase, the next phase is weepy…once i’m over the weepy phase…i’m tough….and way more than a cookie would be.
All was well…excited about the future…then last night, I open a letter and find ANOTHER WUNNA SURPRISE. UGH! It’s not too bad a surprise. But not fun for me, as it now again, takes me away from focusing on my business, the thing that will make me happy and do victory dances, make the money,…which every girl has a RIGHT TO DO..and enjoy…as for the next two months, I’m having to house hunt. This is okay and normal if you’re a free living individual, who can pack a bag and swan off…yet when you are a MUM, this is a big task. Things have to be right.
I JUST WANT TO DO MY EYELASH LINE!!!!!!!!
We’re not even IN MARCH yet..hahahaha…I can’t believe all this is happening. Lmao! By the end of 2014, i’m either going to be a massive success…or just dead or something, glittery, but officially conked out by life.
But right now, you’d think i’d be moping around, pulling more faces, with a morning gin.
NO!!! That’s not my nature. You’d be so proud, i’m already sorting my act out and getting it together. I’ve worked REALLY HARD, double hard this morning and weirdly moved another step up the ladder, if not forward.
I have a smile on my face. Literally. I can do this. I will do this. I’m Sheerah…but hotter. 🙂
The Circus around me is still happening, but I weirdly feel at peace. That’s the secret to success. Where you don’t give in to the swirl of escapism and you army forward with the whole of your heart, doing all the right things to make it work. My life goes GREAT and I can see it. This morning, i’m happy that i’m ME. You can’t get a good kitty down!
I have a wonderful life, such great opportunities…support, magnificent children. (Junior is the biggest cuddle bunny ever fight now. he just wants to take time out of life to cuddle up to Mama and smile. I LOVE THAT. It gives me power. He’ll even say ‘Mama’ (unknowingly) and ask for a cuddle.) Ruby snuggled him all morning after huge massive cries through the night. I don’t know if she’s having her ‘after party’ blues or whether she’s currently suffering from abandonment issues. It’s a big thing for her. I mean, in public she can be as quiet as a mouse, but at home she’s super open and very expressive. She was really upset and has been since her birthday came to an end…and i’m talking nonstop weeping and nightmares…without telling me why? But what I love about her, is that even in her most ‘ouchy’ heart moments, she still looked to her right, saw her baby brother awake and went to cuddle him…and to tell him how much she loved him. She spent her entire morning loving him and trying to make him smile, through her own tears! Junior’s face lit up when he saw her and giggled right back(they get along so well) and just like that, I knew I had am AMAZING FAMILY filled with love…and that every inch of me was going to fight to make sure they were MORE THAN okay.
Rubes did cry more after she realized that she had to go to nursery, because for some reason she just wants to either stay at home with mum or see the world. She doesn’t love going as much now. But I produced one of her birthday presents that Keiran had bought for her…(Keiran and Rubes have this grand and mighty love connection…it is CRAZY. I mean she has a very real connection with ME, it’s a proper ‘Mummy/daughter/tell each other everything/best friendy’ connection and a young, fresh, loving ‘little girl with daddy’ connection with Pete…and she adores her grandparents etc…but with Keiran, well..I don’t know, their connection runs beyond anything describable…it runs deep. ) Anyway…so he’s bought her a bumblebee dress…and within seconds of me showing it to her and telling her who purchased it, her world lit up, her tears seemed to vanish at the speed of light, as she SHRIEKED with joy, snatched it out my hands, rushed it own and for 20 minutes straight, twirled and swirled and giggle an laughed. She danced and loved and almost felt whole again? She even let me picture take and she NEVER lets me do that! What matters is that in that moment…she was happy!
But then Junior (who is the KING of picture taking) decided he wasn’t happy with how I had allotted the attention…Hahaha. So he crawled on in, in a mild huff to be part of the *swirling*…and SEE the first thing she did, was bend down and give him a love. 🙂 I have ACE kids! Between us all, we’ve actually raised them well! Who’ da thought!
Life is good and even when ti’s tough…i know that in the end I have the BRIGHTEST FUTURE READY FOR ME TO WIGGLE INTO! Hard work, whole heart, commitment. Love. (Keep at peace as the circus dizzies around you. Like for example, as I’m currently blogging this, I have a video sent to me via some boy (Lord knows who he is??) but all he has done is taken a brief video of himself seductively and rather bizarrely… softly swirling..a thick wad of cash at me, whilst he’s in his bathroom?? Lol. EWW! (Not on the loo, but honestly WHO DOES THAT!!) I mean, it’s a bit better than genitals, however, isn’t it odd how people who don’t know you, believe you are as a person. It says a lot about his opinion of me (which *urks* me out) and well a lot about how he sees himself. But men do. Men are to money, as women are to beauty. I guess?