Woke up this morning and pretended I was still asleep as i had an old lady pottering around me and trying to grab my attention before I could grab my own attention. I’m not so keen on such behaviour. It seems that yeah I’m an attention whore, yet i dislike that trait in others. (lol.) I think it was more the way she was commiting to the art of ‘Look at Me.‘ I like beings to tend to such business, in a light hearted, almost silly, ‘i can make fun of myself’ way. And not to attempt to ‘Attention whore’ it, in a ‘I need sympathy-poor poor me’ kind of way. It reminded me of Carrie in the BBF house. I used to hate how she would cry and make everyone gather and be forced to ‘aww…poor thing’ around her for a bit of attention. It’s not my style. I cry when my heart actually hurts or i need to release tension. But you know what, i’m a lot less of an attention whore nowadays. I’m growing up and growing out of it. It seems it just happens to find me now, rather than me having to ‘whore’ for it. Lucky really.
Anyway, so lots of you may know that i’m moving to London for a little bit, and i’ve currently found my perfect appartment. I found 2 in a day and both are delicious. They’re brand new, gorgeous Bachelorette pads, all lovely and ME and well hopefully i’ll be moving in one by the beginning of next month. Woo-hoo! One is massive, and i mean ginormous, with an island kitchen..( i always try and imagine where i would be drinking cocktails in it) like i could honestly do my version of cribs in it and it’s in south kensington. The other is smaller, yet AMAZING…already equipped with everything your heart could desire, deliciously put together, wonderfully decorated, like almost designer. Yet i’m just waiting for the guy to give me the nod of approval, as i guess he’s a little jaded, due to past tenants not giving him rent or something? I love the place, but his skeptical ways are putting me off. Either way, the ’Good Time’ gods will direct me to the right one.
Oh god, i’m currently addicted to couselling. Isn’t that awful. I’m craving it all day everyday now and can’t settle for a once a week thing. I mean a lot of ‘jiggery’ happens in my life on a daily basis, and i need to let it out. My blog use to help me do that, however now there’s a whole ‘life’ behind the blog that you all don’t know about. Therefore i’m only 1/4 cleansed by typing out of my ‘tragicness,’ I thought therapy was meant to cure me, not make me addicted to things. Maybe i just enjoy the sound of my own voice. I said that to her…and all I got was a sarcastic, ‘Who…you? Noooo way…’ But it could be worse. At least i’m addicted to getting better and not to crunchy drugs , poking prozzies or stealing lamps. My addiction is far less sexy. But saying that it is about Me, and well that makes it sizzle. (OOh laaa!)
Oh fuck, had an awful Irish man yell at Me this morning. I love the Irish, cos you can steal their wallets when they’re drunk and blame it on some ‘beefcake,’ who’ll they’ll decide to ‘head first’ beat up, to really feel better about their manhood. Anyway, i’m at a coffee shop, having a tall latte. A man comes up to me, who is making it obvious that he may want to ‘sausage’ me. (Eww…) I hate that. It grosses me out when they’ve got faces like bulldogs & go on about how big their cock is. He asks m whether he can sit down. I say ‘No.’ Then he decides to anyway and quite cockily tries to mind game me, by pre-judging my personality. I didn’t say one word and waited for him to delightfully hang himself. He came up to me all, ‘You’d be doing whatever i said, you don’t know yourself, your lost, you live for others.’ (Note to all girls, when men do this to you, when they don’t actually know you…it’s just a line, to try and get to shag you.They try the ‘i’m the only one who understands you’ line…which i actually think is manipulative and disgusting!!) If you have to trick someone into dating you, then you have no self worth. He didn’t know me at all. Don’t let men bully you. He had pre thought, ‘insecure bimbo’ and tried to line his way into my knickers. I’M NOT THAT AT ALL. Infact more than ever, i feel confident, powerful and completely together right now. Hence why i let him say his piece…let him pathetically wither infront of Me. I waited…caused a 7 second silence, then WENT TO TOWN ON HIM.
I’m not gonna tell you what i said…it was only 4 lines. It was sharp, it was sexy. He was shocked, he was hurt. It was clever, it was honest and well let me say when you have a gang of coffee drinking boys cheering at you, and doing ‘oh no way’ faces at the poor unfortunate soul of a man..then you know you’ve earnt your ‘Va Voom.’ I got into my Beamer and zoomed off into the distance, leaving a trail of ‘ooh laa’ behind me.
Last night, i got the most heartfelt letter from a Mother of a lovely girl that reads the blog and it really moved me…she’s going through an awful lot and i’m going to reply to her and help her through things. (I’ve just had a disgusting girl, go on at me on Twitter about how i’m a ‘nobody’ and shouldn’t get off on ‘fan mail.’ And you know what that’s the ‘beauty’ of Chrissie Wunna…just this girl that lives & writes about her life. ‘Fan mail’ is great because it means you are inspiring souls. ‘Hate mail’ means there are still awful beings in the world, who don’t like to see others doing well. But still means ya popular. lol) I get a lot of people opening up to me about their deep rooted issues and I love it as i feel like i’m helping people through life….that isn’t ‘fan mail’ that’s a true life ‘openning up,’ to someone. There’s girls with secret eating problems, men with sexual problems, people with drug problems, girls who are now inspired to do well in life and follow their dreams who write to Me and people never know that i get these letters on a daily. I’m not just a party princess…i’m actually changing lives.
I’m in the mood for love. My heart is a flutter… You know i’m a great deal more ‘love bunny’ than you all think. I believe in fairytale ‘love’ and that sheets are to be shared. But I think i’ve already met the person that I would enjoy spending the rest of my life with and who would make a great father to my ‘not yet had’ children. I always know who i like. I think i’m just going to cuddle people all day, then make them mine forever. (Hahah…that’s a bit sick really.) I’m a commitment girl, a wonderful girl and although fun…i’m a hopeless romantic..and i’m ready to find my ‘Knight.’ Join Me…