Right. So yesterday, before my ‘House Of Solo’ magazine catch up, I was sat writing blog notes, the old fashions way because my phone was on 6% charge. I had a pineapple juice as my only companion. My eyes were red raw and stinging. I don’t know why? Maybe I have a cold? Before you all start…it’s NOT ‘pink eye.’
(Everyone always thinks I’m like this over sexed floozy. I’m just drawn this way…I have my moments. I have too much eye liner on. I have had ‘pink eye’ before. But today is not one of those sexy days. I’m simply have the boring ‘almost flu.’)
Anyway, I got distracted from blog notes, because I was watching a nearby Tinder Date occur before my very eyes. I love watching dates. I hate Tinder. I wouldn’t do Tinder ever. But it does work for some. A friend of mine got married from a ‘Tinder Match.’ If you think you have seen me on Tinder. It isn’t me? I once had a guy spot me and bring me a ‘Baby Powder’ Yankee candle after thinking he had been speaking to me on Tinder for weeks? He let me have the candle anyway! Haha. But obviously be careful.
But yes, watching the awkwardness of others on dates is always delightful! We all love, love. We’re hooked on it. We root for a happy ending…
Sometimes…it’s just shit.
I’m not being awful, before everyone gets their knickers in a twist! Let’s face it. We all know I’m rubbish at dating. Especially first dates. In my defence (lol) I chose to go on a flipping blind date, on the telly, as millions of humans watched on and therefore watched me make a glorious donkey out of myself, in the name of love and entertainment. I loved it! I’d do it again.
They only had ME watching. So, basically. I’m saying…they totally had it easy.
So, they’re sat there. It was strange. They had nothing to really say to one another than the awkward pleasantries and they seemed uncomfortable. Both a bit fidgety, yet hopeful. (It was beautiful.)
They took it in turns to buy each other juice. (I never do juice on a date. I hate juice on a date. I once got given a bottle of water…it was annoying lol.)
It was all ‘So…yeah….I like music…and….erm….I have a dog…’ weirdness.
It was a fumble of sorts and the girl kept talking about how she wanted to lose weight and start an exercise class. She was certainly curvy. They both were. Yet she wasn’t ready to OWN her body and sass it about.
They’re insecurities were almost sweet. There was a delicate uncomfortable, oddness. It was awful to watch the distinct lack of confidence displayed by both parties. Lol.
I wanted to save them…but instead I opted for telling everyone on my Instagram story. 🙂 I needed to tell someone, it was just too much to hold in!! So I told you lot! Be grateful! I was rooting for them!
Anyway, then she pops to the loo. It’s been going downhill. This is why she shouldn’t have had ‘heavy bladder’ juice and instead chose ‘electrify your entire system’ Prosecco. Haha.
He sat alone looking like a lost part. So he picks up his phone…and does that ‘scroll for comfort and no reason’ thing. It seemed to last ages…
It was definitely going shit. His t-shirt was also too small. But that’s fine. It’s life. My egos often too big. I never apologise for it. 😉
Then when she returns…his eyes light up! My heart flutters!!! He doesn’t know what to say though (Noooooooooo) and goes for ..
‘Look at all these girls messaging me on Tinder right now!!!! Some are weird. But some are alright! I mean look at this one….She’s….’
His date: ‘Oh? You’re on Tinder right now?’
Dude: ‘No….erm…no! No….not right now…. I mean…’
His date: ‘I turned my notifications off. Where was it you lived? It’s quite far from
Me isn’t it?’
And just like that he messed up his shot at love!!!
As Dave my acting tutor says…
‘Know how to get out of your own way!!!’
I properly felt for him. I mean we’ve all fumbled. He just looked like he really wanted love. Why he went with ‘look at all these girls..’ I’ll never know? He definitely didn’t mean to! He didn’t realise what he was doing? He panicked!! I’ve done shit like that before….and you honestly cringe afterward.
They didn’t seem to speak for the rest of the date…by then ‘House of Solo’ magazine had walked in and sat down in front of me.
HOS: ‘What you doing?’
Me: ‘Nothing. Blog notes. How are you?’
And just like that life went on…
But I don’t want to leave it glum!
Later than evening… I witnessed blushing and cuteness by fresh cream strawberry scones and signing in forms.
‘She’s on a date tonight?’
…it was with a golf adoring, expensive gin loving potential suitor.
I LOVE seeing a quiet excitement in people’s eyes, when they’re about to go on a date! It’s magical isn’t it?
Of course, being Yorkshire…if such a gleam is witnessed we immediately have to take the playful piss out of them…lovingly.
But I liked it…There was all this love and hope a swirling!!!
So, what I’m gonna say is it’s ‘coupling up’ season as the evenings get a little chillier.
Please do enjoy it!
Ps/ I’ve obviously done a lot over the last few weeks…I’ve been to so many places, met so many people…So all my upcoming blog posts, will be telling you of those adventures. I just needed to general chit chat to get back into the swing of things. Lol