‘Things Not To Say To…

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The amazing thing about life, is that in a second you can sort of ‘blink’ and find yourself in a completely different place, a completely different world, a completely different position, or a completely different chapter. It’s at the point, (after you’ve *blinked* and looked around) that you’re kinda expected to just ‘get on with it.’

Some of us will choose to panic and fill our hearts with fear, as we place on a party hat, that reads nothing but ‘PITY.’ Some will just ride the wave of ‘the unknown,’ keeping everything crossed, as they tinker through a ‘haze.’ Some will lose the plot. Y’know, just go bonkers. Haha.  Others will fight, stand tall and come up with a solution or a method of life survival.

Which one are you? You can be more than one?

But that’s not the point, i’ve *blinked* loads, all over the world and found myself in a ZILLION different positions, chapters, places or situations. Some so wonderful, that I couldn’t even believe my luck. Some so terrifying…that I couldn’t even believe I was stupid enough to sacrifice myself THAT MUCH. Y’know, get myself into that much trouble.

My *blinks* have been extreme.

I’ve *blinked* and found myself walking a red carpet in LA, at a movie premiere. I’ve *blinked* and found myself walking into my home, as a bundle of half dressed, drunk drag queens cried and guzzled cocktails on my West Hollywood sofa… in pyjamas. I’ve *blinked* and found myself at an audition for a million popular tv shows. I’ve *blinked* and found myself waking up next to a stranger, who I didn’t really know, or even really like that much. I’ve *blinked* and found myself giving birth twice. (The first time I had a camera in my face. The second time happened so quickly, I almost seemed like a ‘rush.’) I’ve *blinked* and found myself playing phone roulette, on an orange, office swizzle chair.

I’ve *blinked* and found myself waking up, on my own, in a dark hotel room. That’s happened many times, across the world, over and over again. I’ve *blinked* and found myself crowded by people, as I strut onto a stage, to an applauding audience, whilst accepting some award, for some achievement. I’ve *blinked*and found myself on a blind date, at the ‘First Dates’ restaurant, as millions of people watched on. I’ve *blinked* and found myself serving coffee’s to the locals, in a blue shirt, with a smile. I’ve *blinked* and found myself shooting for Playboy, in NO shirt (haha,) but STILL with the same old smile. I’ve *blinked* and read good things about me. I’ve *blinked* and read bad things about me. I’ve *blinked* and found myself at my OWN wedding THREE different times. Lol. (Infact no…FOUR. I married the first guy twice. We had two ceremonies, because we had secretly got married before our BIG wedding, yet didn’t want to tell anyone.)

I’ve *blinked* and found myself in a ‘tu tu’ as a ballerina on a UK stage. I’ve *blinked* and found myself in a US jail cell, with 14 other women, in blue.

I’ve *blinked* and found myself the happiest I could ever be! So happy, that I happy danced and squealed, as I jumped up and down in my bedroom with excitement.

 I’ve *blinked* and found myself…homeless….in New York…Times Square.

A couple months ago I travelled down to London, to film a little something for the BBC. The day before I had actually been in Surrey, to see ‘DBear.’ I travelled home (back up north) late that day to make sure I managed to see Ruby & Junior and tuck them into bed, with love and laughter. But then after a couple hours sleep, I was up and changed and on a train back to London, to film a little piece about homelessness.

I met some of the most wonderful guys and had the most wonderful cheeky life conversations with them in the ‘green room’ before it was my turn to film. A young guy, filled with ambition, who loved horses, idolised his father, loved Guinness and wanted to own a funeral parlour one day. Another guy, who was my actual filming partner who once had everything, then… lost everything. He also once got arrested for destroying a cardboard box and was kind enough to walk me, all the way to my train, to make sure I was safe.

We were three EXTREMELY different people, waiting to film…(Some were in the studio filming, whilst we chatted.) We were three extremely different people, from three really different walks of life.

We had one thing in common…

..and that was…the simple fact, that at some point in our life….we had ALL been homeless.

The funny thing about it, is that NOT ONE OF US, actually felt sorry for ourselves. There’s wasn’t a single soul there, who whopped out the old ‘violin’ and started milking a story of torture. Lol. Infact,  there was a warm giggle of laughter to the air. So much laughter, the producer kept having to come out and tell us to ‘SSShhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.’

 It was almost like we had a funny story to tell, of a really hard time. It was so hard, that we managed to find the humour in it all. (I call that strength.)

There was a difference though…because I guess luck had given me a *wink* and shined its magical stars upon me…I had a different kind of destiny. One that put me here… to THIS *blink*, where i’m now sitting in the lap of ‘self made’ luxury…yet still hoping to inspire.

The guys had MORE strength, because some of them, were STILL ACTUALLY HOMELESS. (I know Paul, the guy I filmed with CERTAINLY was.)

It was the greatest time. We shared so many stories. There was just so much light and happiness in the room, because we all just ‘got it.’ We all just understood one another.

So i’d like to say, how grateful I was to firstly join the ‘Things Not To Say To..’ team. The crew and production were phenomenal. (If I can do anything it’s banter! I’m much more than a Pepperami stick with eyelashes and tits. They got that! Thank you. 😉 ) Secondly, I made some great friends. I’m so happy I met them. I have all the time in the world for these guys. What beautiful souls. They had the funniest tales. It was just the best time. (And Paul, you are HILARIOUS!!!! Who thought we’d have the same sense of humour!) THIRDLY, I love to break down JUDGEMENTS, don’t I! But I like to do it a light hearted, comedic way. I’m not a sob story…I’m not an aggressive person. I’m a cheeky, northern, exotic looking… DIVA. (Goldilocks had three bears. I had three gins.)

Here’s a little PEEK, of some ‘THINGS NOT TO SAY TO THE HOMELESS…’

(Hit ‘Play.’ I think we’re currently on around 22,000 views. If it hits 100,000 views, I’ll do some kind of sexy forfeit on Insta.)

Park Plaza Moments…

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If you do anything, you should take a ‘staycation.’ It’s one of the healthiest things a human can do. I mean, what could be better, than opening your eyes to the wonder and magic,  that you ALREADY have around you. A wonder and magic that you not ONLY FORGET… is around you. But a wonder and magic that is sort of swept under the carpet, or not seen as a true adventure.

I am the Kitty Queen of Adventure. I have a life diary, documenting the last 10 years of it. (I didn’t need to bungee jump or fly out of a plane to prove ‘adventure.’ That’s cool too. However, just not me. I’m not an adrenalin junkie. I like safety. Plus, I prefer to gaze down and see a pair of Jimmy Choos on the end of my legs, over sports socks any day.) No.  I went on an emotional adventure. It kinda lasted a bit longer ;). It kinda painted a more colourful soul. It kinda made impact. I saw life. I learnt a lot. I’m glad I wrote it down…because most of it is a blur, or flashback now.

That doesn’t make my life any BETTER than anyone else’s.  We all have our own stories. No matter how different, we still have the same problems. If anything, it made life a little more tricky. However, …the trickiness alone, created Wunna Land, which moved on to create opportunity, which shimmied forward to create  ‘mini’ popularity…and turned this little Burmese girl from Doncaster…into ‘Chrissie Wunna.’

So, I’m telling you, that a ‘staycation,’ not only gives you a sense of relaxation & peace, simply because they’re zero stress. There isn’t really anything to organize,  other than packing a bag and showing up, with a smile. Yet at the same time it enables you to appreciate the little pieces of ‘luxury’ that we often (as normal people) disregard.

I love to travel and jump on a plane, just as much as anyone. I love to enjoy the world. Yet it’s not ‘immediate’ enough for me…as I have the babies, work and barely any free time. Sometimes, you just need a quick break, a moment to refuel,  be it yourself, family, friendship or love life.

I wrote the kids a note at 7am, April 8th, Monday morning…

Dear Ruby & Junior. Pack an overnight bag. We’re going on a STAYCATION.’

They were a little confused, yet because they trusted me with all of their hearts, within minutes 2 little bags were packed…and we were sat at a train station, ready to venture into the city.

They were so excited. They couldn’t believe their eyes. They beamed and radiated a giddy glow of life…and when I saw them leaping around with joy, I just knew it was the best thing I could’ve ever done. It made me feel so happy to see them so…I can’t even describe how excited they were? (That excitement lasted, from beginning to end.)

I chose Park Plaza, Leeds. I stay there all the time. I do regular ‘staycations,’ if I’m honest. This was the first time I took the babies. (They’ve obviously stayed in hotels before, many a time. This time was different, because this time it was a treat, an adventure and a ‘surprise.’)

I also chose Park Plaza because it’s a 1 minute walk away from the train station. I like things to be easy and ‘no hassle’ when I have the children. Infact, no…even in general. It’s perfectly located directly in the heart of the city. It’s ‘bouji.’ Service is always great. They have the most giant beds. The rooms are spacious. (I like SPACE.) Plus, THE VIEWS of the city are remarkable. They make you feel so free. They also make you feel so powerful. 😉

Ofcourse, this is Wunna Land, so we enjoyed a giant, executive suite on the top floor. (Well, the 19th floor…but who’s counting? 😉 ) When the children checked in, they were greeted like kiddie ‘royalty,’ and given their own Park Plaza rucksacks, filled with goodies, activities and Park Plaza money, that they could use within the hotel for drinks and snacks etc… (Aww.) They felt so grown up. They loved it.

Junior looked after the room key, with his life…and as we shot up to the 19th Floor, in the elevator and I showed them how to open the door to suite. (I took them for fun. However, I also took them to teach them life, love and independence. In restaurants, I never order for them, I make them order their food and drinks themselves. In toy stores, they are each given pocket money and they have to calculate their money, pick a toy, go to the cashier and pay themselves. If they have a problem in the store…or restaurant. Like, If they can’t find something…or something isn’t right? I make them ask a member of staff…themselves. Haha. Harsh, I know.)

They pushed the door to our executive suite open cautiously…and as they did, their mouths dropped to the floor, almost like they had paused for a moment…Then after a breath and a little bit of ‘shock,’ they dashed in screaming with joy and excitement. They flung their bags down, kicked their shoes off, turned all the lights and every piece of electronic equipment in the room ON…and ran around with utter amazement, opening doors, cupboards, running baths, putting on movies, picking things from the 24 hr ‘room service’ menu for dinner and finally dancing on our huge 19th floor, executive ‘family suite’ window sill. It was corner suite, so two walls were windows.

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It was amazing. Just watching them was amazing. They looked over the city, with wonder, as they towered above it. They never knew Leeds was so big. They never realised it was so magical. They appreciated where they were from and where they were.

I kinda swung in, threw my bag down on the bed, poured a fresh white wine and smiled….because I do it all the time. Haha. I just loved watching them. It filled my heart with joy and what better feeling than making people you care about THAT EXCITED. That happy. It’s something I love.

We did everything on offer at Park Plaza. They had ‘room service.’ (Junior got the pizza. Ruby ordered sushi from the restaurant. It was brought up to her. ) They bought drinks at the bar with their Park Plaza money. (If you have children Under 12, they eat and drink for free during their Park Plaza stay.) They took extra long showers, after warm, evening city walks, chatted to guests, played, chilled and sang at the top of their voices.

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I pictured and videoed everything, because I never wanted them to forget how happy they were. They didn’t even want to leave.  Their eyes were filled with adventure. They’re hearts were filled with love. They chatted to ‘Grandma’ (my Mum) to tell her ALL about their suite. They’re adventure. I sent ‘DBear’ (my love) messages and videos…and he smiled at how cute the kids were.

So my ‘staycation’ was about filling their hearts with adventure, joy, independence and happiness. There were people on dates. Married couples on weekday breaks. There were Business men. There were others who just found themselves in Leeds and wanted to enjoy the city. There were people who just needed to refuel, but didn’t want to go far. There were families who didn’t want to break the bank, but wanted to treat themselves to fun. There were people who had enjoyed an evening of cocktails and didn’t want to taxi home.

No matter what walk of life we all came from, as we entered the revolving glass doors, into the modern, ‘clean cut’ hotel, from the busy city streets of Leeds….we all had one thing in common and that was the fact that we had treated ourselves, for all different reason, to a bit of safe,  city luxury, where everything was just made easier.

Leave your worries behind. Take a ‘Staycation.’ It’s worth it. There’s magic right on your doorstep.  

Park Plaza, you were WONDERFUL. Thank you SO MUCH.

The fun that the children had is posted on their Instagram page @rubyandjunior (Check it out. Give them a follow.)

And…all my fun will be REPOSTED on my Insta story, this weekend…@chrissiewunna

Have your Park Plaza moment…. You might see me there.

True Love, Family & Vagina Eczema…

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So, there I was, with a large white wine, burdened with ice, in the corner of ‘Ego Mediterranean,’ in Ackworth. (I place I always go to work, chill or dine. I love it there and I love the staff dearly.) ‘Fly Me To The Moon’ was my background noise. It was actually  being sang, by a live jazz singer, with a limp. (He was amazing.) Ruby & Junior had finished a three course meal, that ended with a crème brulee & a fresh ginger, Eton Mess , before they danced together, to old school jazz songs…with spins. Ruby wanted to go after a few hours and Junior wanted to party all night. We even bumped into KatyP and Golfer Jonny, who I haven’t bumped into in months!

KatyP: ‘It’s Wunna!’

Me: ‘Oh shit! It’s you!! I’ve missed you.’

Then just as I thought life was bliss…because it really did feel like bliss. I felt free, alive and filled with love and family….

 I read a group Whatsapp message, with informed me that my chick friend ‘Double B,’  had now been blessed with ‘vagina eczema.’ (He boyfriend ‘Big J,’ looked at it and apparently ‘made a noise.’ HE made the noise. Not her vagina…Which surprises me, because she’s been sat on some dodgy Mickey Mouse cushion, to ease the pain. Surely that means her Vagina is magically ‘Disney’ now. Soooo surely, it can talk, or skip or cast happy spells of forgiveness and shit, right?

Firmonnell: ‘A noise? Haha. What noise did he make?’

Double B: ‘It was a mixture of nice and surprised?? Haha.’

Hustle Barbie: ‘What? Like he liked the vag, but not the scabs??’

Mel: ‘Have you actually got scabs on your vagina??’

Double B: ‘Haha…No scabs. Just dry sadness.’

THEN I SEE A FUCKING PHOTO HAS COME THROUGH…whilst i’m at a bar, trying to enjoy wine, whilst watching my children dance to jazz songs, by a talented gentleman, with a limp.

Like i’m not about a SURPRISE PHOTO of a scabby vagina, right now!!! However hurrah, she nly sent through a boring picture of a bunch of ointments from her Doctor.

Double B: ‘..for the vagina and the neck area only.’

Hustle Barbie: ‘Haha.Why would you want to put it anywhere else??’

I definitely miss the girls…But I don’t want to hang out with anyone with vagina eczema, just yet. I’m headed for a ‘Happy Ever After.’  I can’t catch shit like that. Haha. I look after my public area, ( these days…) with ultimate love..I promise it gently glows and gracefully throbs, whilst it awaits the love of my ‘DBear.’ Lol. (It doesn’t at all swear…Honest!)

When her ‘stress’ has cleared up…Then we can talk. Hahaha.

But right now, I have shit to do, like take over the world and get my weave cut out.

Anyway, I have a lot planned.

The Babies are now off school, for Easter & there’s lot of fun in store. The fun began as school as they clocked out of school and from that point on it’s been wonderful. We’ve laughed, lived, shopped, dined and celebrated being Burmese, with stage shows ALREADY and we’re only a couple days in. They’re really excited. I’m really excited AND we have a little trip away, shortly. Stuff is great. We’re writing books and filming.

I’m back to my old self again now and i’m filled with confidence and that thing called joy.

On the love front….(The part everyone is always dying to know about…)

I’m still madly in love. We do have a lil’ distance between us, right now. However it hasn’t changed a thing. I’m brimming with the happiness and that’s what life and love is about.

Firmonnell: ‘You love a whirlwind.’

And that is true. HOWEVER, this time, i’m not in a tizzy, or a swirl like madness of ‘being a girl.’ It feels really different, because it feels really stable, without the smoke, mirrors and glittery spins. It feels honest, pure and solid. It kinda feels ‘ forever.’ It kinda feels ‘family.’

 Honestly, (I did really good…for once.) ‘DBear’ is amazing. He’s one of the most beautiful men, I’ve ever met. He’s a really good guy. Yes, he has a story to tell. But don’t we all. But he’s sexy, supportive, thoughtful, loving and all about family. He stands by me no matter what and smiles with his eyes, when we giggle. He’s like my teddy bear.

 I could’ve found my actual soul mate. I think? I mean, I’m over the moon. He makes me really happy. I feel really lucky. Plus, I seem to make him more than smile…I seem to make his heart feel happy…and that, to me… is everything. 😉

I hope I get to keep him forever.

DBear: ‘You have me.’

Other than that, it’s babies, babies, work, work, glamming it up and babies for me. I’ve got a few events, lots of shoots, cocktails and business to tend to. But my priority is the bambinos. I couldn’t love them anymore. They’re a dream.

What we’re concentrating on this Easter is building confidence in EACH OTHER, because all three of us have our moments….

Ruby: ‘ I wish I had a Dad that lives with us.’

Junior: Noooo, Mum! I daren’t ask. I’m too scared.

Me: ‘I just NEED to see some proper success now mum, cos it’s…’

I’ve done well. I’m doing well, but i’m ready to step this up a notch now…Let’s burst into flames and smash this ABOUT!

‘Wet Through Inside’ Liquors, Gift Shops & Botox…

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Last night, I dreamt of rice, in abundance, being gracefully poured… out of a sack towards me. Now, I don’t know whether, I dreamt of rice because i’m Asian (*wink*) or because i’m about to be blessed with ‘…. prosperity, luck, success, joy and happiness?’ (That’s what it means. I looked it up at 4.42am, this morning. I missed out the word ‘fertility’ because, let’s face it, I’ve got my mitts pretty full.)

Then I dreamt that I was merrily drinking red wine. Again, I don’t know if that’s because I could be classed as an alcoholic (*wink*) OR because i’ve about to have a ‘…powerful patron/support that will help me receive honours and riches?’

Either way! The omen is good. Haha. Now I can uncross my fingers and start walking over cracks.

But anyway, on March 23rd, I arrived at Selby train station, after missing my connection by six minutes, to Howden. It was a really quiet station and everyone looked moderately frightened of my existence. Yet, my faux fur and lip liner didn’t seem to mind and therefore tottered about filled with life, love and excitement. No one wanted to chat to me, so I plugged my phone into a wall, to give it some ‘juice’ and Snapchatted ‘DBear,’ who was in the process of calling me a ‘Superstar.’

Tom: ‘HeeeY!’

Boom! Just like that, Tom (@shoptomloves) appeared out of nowhere, kinda like a Fairy God Mother to greet me. (Liz @virtueskinclinic) and Tom came to pick me up from Selby station, because my next train was an hours wait…) I heard another voice. I thought it was Liz. It wasn’t. Haha…

Me: ‘I can HEAR yooooou….’

It was just some grumpy lady, on a bicycle, who didn’t want me to talk to her. J (If you’re gonna cycle through town, you might as well smile because honestly what could be worse than cycling ANYWHERE…sober.)

I once got on a bike in Amsterdam, in a mini skirt, magenta heels and a GIANT WHITE faux fur, with diamonds in my ears…and hair that could suggest that my next stop was ‘Tea with Ru Paul.’ As soon as I got on it, my friends just looked and politely said…

‘GET OFF THAT NOW, WUNNA. YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE A FUCKING IDIOT.’

Anyway, I jumped into Liz’s car. (Liz  is extremely attractive. She’s sexy. I’d say dipped in deliciousness.) Then almost without a BLINK, I found myself in the beautiful Yorkshire village of Howden. (It’s actually remarkably stunning.) There was a beautiful huddle of children waiting for me, when I arrived, who’d been watching my Insta Story. They knew I was showing up in their town and were excited to ‘selfie’ with me. I really really loved that, because it always makes me feel so alive. It’s like they added a ‘sparkle’ to my sassy lil’ appearance in Howden. I appreciated it, dearly.

But yes, I tend to waffle, so i’m gonna hit the bullet points instead.

Let’s go….

I took trip to Tom’s gift shop ‘Tom Loves.’ It’s the most amazing place of utter fun, glamourous, sassy, naughty gifting. It’s one of my favourite gift shops, filled with the most unique treasure and let’s say anytime you walk out of a store with a baby pink sign reading ‘Boss Lady, a lilac candle, with the word ‘FUCK’ engraved in it, a pink feathered quill pen and an oven mitt reading ‘Fuck this shit,’ after glammy chatter, under a bright pink neon sign…YOU KNOW LIFE IS GOOD. I love Tom. I’ve known him for years and years and he’s really special to me, because he’s always a wonderful delight….and drinks like a fish. Haha. Every single time I bump into him, my face just beams. When that happens, I know my heart feels good. He’s my new gay bestie.  

Straight after that is was time for what we called ‘Botox & Bubbles’ at the Virtue Skin Clinic, via the Goddess that is Liz. She’s a glamour puss. I want to BE Liz. She kinda looked at my face lovingly, like it was a work of art..with a big needle in her hand. (Haha.) Weirdly I wasn’t scared, because she was so comforting, in a humorously sassy way.  (It’s like we have the same personality.)

Basically she was divine. I never once had to explain myself or state what I may need, because she was already way ahead of me and had it all ready and prepared. Lol. She’s really smart. She’s one of the most hard working women I know. The Botox session was over in a painless jiffy and as she handed me a goody bag and a contour pallet, we ventured to a glamourous dining table for the finest prosecco and ‘wet through inside’ liquors, with Tom.

Me: ‘I’m trying to do a fucking Insta story & whenever I do, someone says something inappropriate in the background. Haha.’

Drinks, laughter, fun, banter, last minute gifts and lamps were discussed, before knickers were changed, (‘they’re a bit too tight on my…,) faces were contoured (‘…as if that only took me five fucking minutes. I went from leprosy to glamourous,) and Tom, Liz & I headed to ‘Bishops Bistro,’ for 7pm dinner…’Flourish and Prosper’ for vino with a wine merchant and the best Espresso Martini in all the land, at ‘Coffee & Wine By Tommy.’ (Howden is filled with the most beautiful secret bistro’s and bars. The people are great. The lifestyle is wonderful.)

Tom: ‘You should move here, Queen.’

I had the Thai Green Curry at ‘Bishops Bistro’ and it was DIVINE. Tom managed to accumulate free wine and Liz is literally a hit, with everyone in town.

WE DRANK. WE ENJOYED OUR TIME WITH WINE, AS OUR STAPLE.

It was just a wonder. A glorious ‘blur’ of magic, good friendship, new faces and life. I’d just tinkered off the most emotionally draining week, that it just felt so so marvellous, to cut away, be with these amazing souls and feel appreciated for the day, without stress. They both treated me so incredibly well. My heart adored them for it. It’s just what I needed. I appreciated it madly.

Anyway….

Tom definitely gave me an espresso martini to take on the road, as Liz had a driver arrive, to travel me home… to my doorstep, in one sassy piece. I definitely puked in one of my gift bags, on the way home J…and the driver confiscated my martini with laughter.

‘I enjoy that you did not get it anywhere in the car. Haha. Well done. I’ve never seen anyone look so glamourous when puking.’

I was home and safe really really quickly…

I cannot WAIT to revisit in May.

Warming it up…

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I’m sorry I haven’t blogged in ages. I’ve just been doing life & having fun. I haven’t wanted to blog, even though i’d take my pink laptop everywhere with the sheer intentions of goodness. I’ve done so much. I’ve lived. I’ve loved. No. Infact, i’ve prioritised. If you could feel how insane the last month has felt on my heart, you’d get it. It’s been filled with success, but emotional torment. True love, yet family stress. Great friendships, yet horrific USERS…An utter sense of worth and identity, but at the same a literal loss of ‘this is me.’

Everything happens for a reason…I’m not one to dwell. You get over everything with a better gust of swiftness, when you just sit and feel it. I’ve done that. I smashed that. Haha. I’m now fresh of daisies.

I came out of the last month, knowing the people who I  loved and knowing the people who I hated.

(And I don’t mean ‘disliked,’ I mean hated.)

Don’t be afraid to tell the people who need to fuck off out of your life TO ‘fuck off.’ The shit that they carry internally, should never be burdened upon you. Let them do their worse, because in the end a good heart, good soul, and the faith in that alone… always wins. The glory that they get from their momentary bit of ‘Yippee’ from being a dick, doesn’t remotely compare to the actual long term success that you achieve. A success that they will never have, simply because of their manner.

But also…

Don’t be afraid to tell the people that you love, that you LOVE & appreciate them. I say it ALL the time, but hear it back very little. Haha. Being an attention whore, this doesn’t suit me well. So please do say it more. 😉 Learn from me, say it all the time, even when you don’t hear it back. Something in the air around you changes and a good kinda magic happens.

But yes, i’ve been meaning to blog, yet left my laptop unopened. It didn’t matter where I took it, with good intentions. But I figured, If I just got on with ‘getting a blog out the way’…the flow & essential, glittery discipline would just naturally ooze from my kitten soul? Right??? Then, i’d be ready to go.

So this is kinda my warm up…

I will say that I’ve had the most remarkable weekend with the babies. Junior is filled with love and confidence. He’s a really sensible boy, with a heart of gold. Ruby is ME, is every single way. So you can literally imagine, what she will be like. However, when it comes to love…both are like this….

Ruby: ‘Mum, the love that I have, in my heart for you… is insane.’

Junior: ‘I love you soooo much Mum…I have a *M* on my heart….’

 There were moments through the weekend where in which I saw how filled with glee they were and every inch of me filled with utter happiness. It made a change from the wine top ups.. Lol. My brain sort of hit *pause* and their faces went into slow motion…as we sat on top of a ferris wheel, in the sky, above the world below. I looked at Junior as he was in a state of euphoric happiness. I looked at Ruby and she giggled out loud, at the top of her voice. That alone, alongside time with my own Mum (who is my idol), painted our weekend adventure in nothing short of diamonds.

Baby Daddy: ‘I don’t know why they love Chrissie SO much. But they live for her. They are her. Which makes it hard as a Dad, to either of them, to even get a look in, when it comes to the love department…and that can be really hard.’

(I’ll tell ya why! It’s because I show them how much I love them. How much they matter to me, EVERY DAY. I’m honest with them. I trust them. I let them BE THEMSELVES. I never wanted them to feel at a loss, so I put everything into their world of love. I don’t judge them and I’ve always put both of them BEFORE, I put myself. *JUSTSAYINBOO*)

But anyway…

The family ARE all filming a show right now (it was meant to be an IG series, but it managed to get ‘picked up’) and it’s been great. It’s actually been fun meeting you all, whilst filming….and it’s just been wonderful to have such a flipping opportunity! I didn’t actual realise how many ‘showmen’ we had in the family. Lol

What I need to do is I tell you all about my time in Howden…(because I had THE BEST TIME EVER, with Tom & Liz, who are two of the most brilliant people, I’ve ever met.) I’ve known Tom (@shoptomloves) for years…and Liz (@virtueskinclinic) has been the most perfect addition to Wunna Land.

But before I go into my time in Howden, I’ll tell you, i’m still in love. ‘DBear’ is a marvel. He’s just wonderful. He’s the most supportive soul. I tell you that he’s away right now. But it’s kinda made me love him more dearly.

DBear: ‘We’re in this together. You can do this…I believe in you baby.’

..and although he’s feeling a little shocked and surprised (in a good way)…everything is accidentally fitting into place. I feel really lucky. We’re both really happy. (I know ‘AS IF!)

But anyway on the 23rd of March (because we’ve now hit April 1st) I ventured to the beautiful village of Howden to see Liz and Tom. This blog was meant to be about that…Yet,  used it as a warm up to the ‘bonanza.’

Liz is one of the most thoughtful and beautiful Queens of utter panache, that I have ever met. (And i’ve met a lot of people.) The way she made me feel was divine, on every level. On the love and service scale of ‘utter divinity,’ she’s up there at ‘1.’ So Liz, knows my dear friend Tom (it’s how it works)  and owns the Virtue Skin Clinic, In Howden.

 After my experience…I pretty much made Liz in charge of my entire face, simply because she’s a dream come true. I went to her for Botox and fillers…I’m in my late 30’s, heading into my 40’s soon and wanted my face to look delicious. I found @virtueskinclinic. I found Liz.

Me: ‘Stop laughing… when you have a needle in your hand.’

… and the results have been MARVELLOUS. I can’t wait to show you.

 Yet away from that, as a human being, she is everything. There’s something about her that’s so incredibly inspirational, with a sassy, witty, fun twist of glamour. She looks after everyone. She’s First Class. But her eyes tell a story. I don’t know that story..but I know that there IS one.

Tom: ‘You’re both SO alike. I had to make you hangout.’

Me: ‘I love her.’

She works so hard and has everything she wants. There’s an actual apartment inside her home and a Italian marble stoned, bar of HUGENESS…. I was impressed…YET, again, away from all that, her soul is just exciting, glamourous yet pure. She’s fun.

Liz: ‘I’m gonna have to change my knickers because these are too tight, on the…’

There’s a lot i’m gonna tell you about my time in Howden…and it all started when I rocked into Selby train station…