Things are great. I’m back from my mini travels. I’m really busy. I’m on shoot after shoot and it feels great. I’m working hard. I’m trying to get my game back on and strong. I feel really lucky and I truly appreciate the support i’m getting.
The reason why it feels so good, is because i’m just minding my own business and getting on with my version of life, with a joy in my heart. I don’t tangle in other peoples drama. I don’t tinker where I’m not meant to tinker. I don’t measure myself up against others. Nor do I shoot others down…unless they cross a certain line of respect.
I’m keeping myself to myself. I’m doing what I love. I’m sharing my life story and i’m hopefully inspiring others.
Always do what you love. Always cherish the people who, NO MATTER WHAT, have your back.
Don’t waste time on things that hurt you, bore you…y’know the things that don’t make you feel whole or happy.
Good things happen to good people…Always, ALWAYS remember that!
I didn’t think that I’d be doing all these shoots at 38. I’m nearly 40 and still reaching for my stockings or bikini. I’m happy I am, because now I feel as though i’m truly representing something. I’m fighting a worthy fight. When I feel like I have a purpose, I feel mighty. It makes me work harder.
It kinda took that girl ‘hating on me’ on Jan 1st, to motivate me. Never let anyone tell you, you’re too old…or that you CAN’T do something. You’re always gonna be rusty at first. You’re always gonna mess up. But when you work hard. When you do all that you can, but with a sincere peace in your heart, you’ll smash it and you’ll feel proud.
That pride will radiate lovingly from you and that kinda love is contagious. It’s inspiring. I love to feel inspired by others. I love to see that glow. I love to fall down a couple ‘strength rungs,’ yet be able to look up with hope…
I’ll tell you the truth. I do feel old. Yet, i’m not trying to be young. I’m trying to be me. So is it a ‘comeback?’ Yeah, I’d say so…and I guess a lot of people are doing the same. I think it’s because when you grow older, and you’ve kind of career, that has involved a bit of ‘glitz.’ You want to be able to prove TO YOURSELF that you can do it AGAIN. It’s twisted, but fun, all at the same time. Lol.
I wanna blow my OWN mind, without putting my back out. Haha.
So, yeah i’m really excited for my next shoot… I’m having fun. I’m enjoying it.
Chick friend: ‘You’re like this weird never ageing woman?’
Me: ‘Must be all the cocktails. It kept my soul hydrated. Haha.’
‘No. But honestly. You look better now, than you did before. You look better in person, than you did on tv.’
‘Thanks. That’s sweet. My body feels old though. Anyone can throw money at themselves and LOOK a certain way. I’m trying my best.’
Anyway, i’ve got to wrap this up because I have an 11.30am meet up with ‘Big A’ from House of Solo Magazine.
I cried last night and Ruby cuddled me. I’m going through such a wonderful time in my career and with the kids. My love life isn’t even rubbish. I’m talking to someone and I like them.
Keiran, who is my ex husband…My son’s Father…. is causing all kinds of problems in Wunna Land, to the point where everyone’s had enough. (It’s only because i’m doing really well and he can’t control any of us.) Anyway, he’s got his religious ‘judgemental’ knickers in a twist and trying to be all threatening. (Which really isn’t very Godly of him? It’s more ‘gangsta’ but less juicy.) It’s kinda got to the point where the children have had enough. When that happens….I sort it.
But y’know when you just have a moment, where you just need a big shout or a big cry, when no ones looking. I opted for a secret cry. Haha. Now, I actually feel fine. I feel all Girl Power! 😉
Ruby (Last night)…as she cuddled me: ‘Don’t cry mum…You look like a frog.’
Don’t give energy to people or things that litter your world with their own negativity….They do not deserve a reaction…
Good things happen, to good people….