Friends, Wine, Gingers & *C* Bombs

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Morning! Gosh! It’s such a busy time. I’m running around like a topless ๐Ÿ˜‰ chicken, trying to get everything dished, dashed and sorted. It’s absolute mayhem. But, what can I say, I’m loving it. (I never take for granted how lucky I am.)

There’s a lot going on right now and yeah, it can feel stressy and yeah, yesterday I felt like I didn’t have the positive support that I needed…But today’s a new day…I’m breathing, I’m smiling and i’m sat blogging this in a giant faux fur, knee high boots, diamante danglers and with heated rollers in my hair!

THAT MY BITCHES…IS GLAMOUR PUSSING. We’ll call it *EXTRA.* ๐Ÿ˜‰

Anyway, that last Sunday, I ended up meeting ‘Poggy’ at The Carleton for a couple drinks…without my bank card. (I have it now. Life is bliss.) The guy she wanted to maybe go on a date with was busy, yet instead, a different guy had waited all night until his guy friends had each left, then approached her with a…

‘I was waiting for them to leave, so I could get to chat to you….’

They ended up on a ‘date.’ So, even though it’s ‘early days,’ I guess everything happens for a reason. You get what you’re meant to get…and life sort of times things correctly for you. You’ll be surprised at how many things do actually fall into place. It’s magical and like I always say, it’s a ‘magic’ we can’t control.

I never use timing as an excuse. You meet people because you’re meant to meet them..even if right away that second, you have no clue why? It’s always for a reason, a season or a lifetime. You’re paths will keep crossing, until all life elements are correctly in place, and you’ve figured out your connection.

Barmaid to Poggy: ‘He’s the kinda man who will kiss you when you need to be kissed and slap you when you need to be slapped.’

That Sunday night ended up being wilder than I thought? So much fun. Good friends, new memories and all around a table…as day turned to night.

There was laughter, wine and sarcasm as it’s finest…and as always, we definitely got carried away. You can’t get us started with banter, in the name of wit and ‘Being Yorkshire’ we go for it.

I went to school with ‘Poggy’ and she’s been a good friend of mine for years. We were actually laughing over the fact that our ‘careers teacher,’ stated that she would become a marine and that I would become a florist, after we answered a couple of personality questions. Lol.

Poggy: ‘How the F*** did they come up with that!!’

Me: ‘I must have just said I like flowers and pretty things and you must have said that you…’

Pet Laura: ‘Like to kill things…Lol. It’s like The Hunter & The Vajazzle.’

(‘Pet Laura’ is a Dog Groomer. She found herself at our table, wishing she was in Africa, bottle feeding tigers, or something? Then she had gin.)ย 

One gin down and she was naming our vagina’s after ‘Harry Potter’ spells. I distinctly remember looking up and for some reason ‘Poggy’ and ‘Pet Laura’ were doing these weird hand actions and refering to their ‘lady parts’ as..

HUNTER.

(Mine’s not a ‘Hunter,’ mines just tired. Hi, True love! Where are you? Please find me.)

Poggy: ‘I think that because you have such a busy life and a busy life online, you would always need a man who is chilled. Someone who gets on with it and takes that stress away…’

Me: ‘Yeah, I don’t like a stressy man. I don’t like them to come with a bundle of emotional issues… I don’t like things to be complicated. I don’t have time to unfold, mend or cry into wine anymore.’

Y’know, everyone always thinks i’m picky when it comes to love and I’m not picky as in ‘fussy,’ i’m just happy and when you’re happy….you sometimes wonder whether you need to invite another human in? But then I think, I’m gonna need someone to carry heavy bags and do the bins, aren’t I? ๐Ÿ˜‰

So, yeah, I should probably team up with a fella and do ‘lifetime’ sometime shortly.

I just don’t want to invest in a ‘fling’ at 37. I can’t be arsed. I’m not excited by them. I’m too old for that I’ve ‘flung’ all the way through my 20’s, hoping that it would always be forever. Each time I got it wrong. Even after ‘I doing it’ three whole times!

What I’ve learnt, is that I don’t need to worry about it. YOU don’t need to worry about it either. Girls always worry about it. I never do.ย  I have absolute faith, that no matter what, the man who truly loves me, because he can’t help it, (banter, winks, diva strops and all)….will come get me. (I shouldn’t have used the word ‘get’ it makes it sound like he’s gonna kidnap me and throw me in the back of a van.)

But you get what I mean….innit! ๐Ÿ™‚

All I have to do, is ‘sit pretty,’ get on with life…and wait. Cupid an I are mates now. He doesn’t mess with me. I don’t mess with him. It’s simples. Plus, Girls shouldn’t chase boys. We shouldn’t have to. I enjoy the traditional art of the ‘dude coming forward.’

Annnnnyway… (I totally got distracted…)

That Sunday…day turned to night and the bright blue skies, were slowly blanketed with a navy sheet, that almost swirled in a grey mist, littered with stars. (I don’t actually know if there were stars out?? Lol. I’ve made that bit up.)

‘Pet Laura’ had left and just as she did, the outside door swung open and out popped ‘Parsons.’ (She’s a friend of a friend, who is ace, because whenever she’s drunk, she gets really gobby and starts doing hand stands and rollie pollies everywhere.)

The tempo changed to that good old, loud, cracking, fast Northern, naughty, foul mouthed, BANTER.

IT WAS GREAT! (I cannot even repeat what was said.)

‘Parsons’ enjoys to use the *C* bomb, which I always find hilarious. She’s such a free spirit. Such a wild, loud, laugh! In fact, she loves the *C* bomb so much, that she even delivers it in melody.

Everything at this point turned into a blurry, fun, wine drenched haze. And a red ‘outside heater’ glow, surrounded us. It nurtured us. It kept us safe. It obided to he rules of The Wine Gods.

Now, ‘Poggy’ and ‘Parsons’ got on really well…They have swimming in common. They want to swim everywhere together. They want to travel the world and swim through valleys.

It was like one of those moments when you first meet someone in a bar, but you’re both pissed, think you’re best friends and plan holidays together! ๐Ÿ™‚

Me: ‘You’re definitely not going to swim together.’

Parsons: ‘Everyone thinks i’m fat. But i’m actually a really good swimmer.’

(Then she did ‘swimming arm’ demonstrations at me.)

Me: ‘I only do breast stroke with my face above the water, so it doesn’t ruin my face.’

Anyway, they had some unique ‘hoe’mance’ going on. They loved each other and mocked ‘Parsons’ ginger husband, who was definitely stood, pressing the ‘heater on’ button every 10 seconds.

Poggy: ‘He’s like The King of The Gingers.’

Me: ‘But he’s not even ginger? You can’t be The Ginger King…when you’ve got brown hair? Surely that’s not a title you can take?’

Parsons: ‘He IS ginger. I’ve got a ginger kid and i’m a brunette. I love you *Poggy,* you’re like a blond version of me… in a polo neck.’

(Now, i’ve just looked at my blog notes from that evening and I’ve typed ‘Fast pass to brown hair,’ after that piece of ‘polo neck’ statement. However, I have no clue, what that means now? Lol. All I remember was looking up and seeing the girls bickering over who had said the ‘funniest’ thing..)

‘Why have you put that down. I said something WAAAY MORE FUNNIER THAN HER and that SHOULD MAKE THE BLOG.’

All got really drunk. All had a lot of fun. I got stopped a couple times, that evening by the occasional Geordie and people who love my ‘Blog/Influencey’ stuffs.

I absolutely bantered with you all. But I was far too drunk to dish out advice, which is what everyone was asking me for. ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ve received your DM’s though…So, i’ll try and swizzle in some time to meet and inspire. (I appreciate the love.)

Message me again, in case I forgot. There’s not such thing and reminding me TOO MUCH. I love ‘people reminders’ as I often get lost in work load and jiggery pokery.

Right, I’m off. I’ve got the babies and a lot to try and organize. Things have been so jam packed, that it’s been hectic. I fly to Spain in 7 days. Thursday morning.

I’m kinda really looking forward to getting away for a few days by myself, just to relax and finally get that ‘chill’ time in,ย  that I never seem to prioritize.

It’s been a busy first part of the year…and sometimes I feel like i’m running as fast as I can, but on the spot. Lol.

What I need right now, is to relax…a wine….and a result.

(Things are never that easy though, are they?)

Kisses,

Chrissie,

 

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Girls Nights, Cocktails & A Random Brave Message..

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Morning!!! So sorry, I couldn’t whizzle out a little bit of ‘diary’ yesterday. I don’t know what happened?ย  I just decided toย  surrender to ‘knackeredness’ after the weekend. I felt tired and hungover and both my babies are currently off school, so I found myself having to slide through tunnels in the sunshine, whilst having a picnic. Even though that sounds delightful to some….the park is NOT a place to be hungover. Bottom line…Ruby & Junior LOVED it and I guess, when it comes to life and parenting…that’s all that matters.

I now, NEVER blog when I’m shattered, as my story always lacks the essential ‘gusto.’ And I also try to refrain from blogging when drunk (these days)…as like tipsy texting…the blog is very rarely written by me and often should be credited to vodka. (Yet, I do adore a Wunna drunk blog. The last one ended in me being sick.)ย 

Okay, so Saturday evening, I worked, I mummied and with a *wink* and a *shimmie,* I managed to FIT INTO my ‘diet dress‘ deliciously designed by The Kardashians, glam up, damn up and venture over to The Electric Theatre for ‘Fairytales’ 30th birthday. (I don’t do weight loss via scales and tape measures…I do it via goal dresses.)

Right, I haven’t seen all the girls, apart from ‘Firmonnell’ (who is my chick best friend,) in a really long while. My life tinkered me in a completely different direction….a far less bumpy road, filled with magic and selfie taking ๐Ÿ˜‰ . Work & passion took my hand, things got busy, dreams came true and I sort of had to look behind me and *wave* them off, as I focused, on doing me, happiness and everything i’ve always wanted to.

(I told you, this is the chapter of my life, where I am being a shit friend…down to work.)

So, regardless, it was really good to bump into everyone, even though we couldn’t really ‘catch up.’ We dedicated the night to ‘Fairytale,’ who looked divine, tipsy and not even nearly 30! And we were there to make sure she knew that we adored her….via booze.

I was there first, even though the girls has NAGGED ME to make sure I turned up. I sent them a snapchat, after seeing they still had rollers in their hair and a boozy ‘ring of fire’ going on around a dining table. Lol.

‘You dicks. Don’t rush me here, when you’re not even fucking ready, let alone nearly HERE! Hustle’s still got rollers in! You’re shit friends. I’m here first. Lol’

They arrived…Pissed…and began hugging ans lip smooching me.

Firmonnell: ‘I feel really discombobulated from you right now!’

Me: ‘I feel like I have so much to say, but I can’t say it. I think it’s shocked my system being around everyone.’

(It was sort of like going back in time….glamourously, of course. We’re ‘dress up’ gals by nature, so we don’t like to look shit. There was one on the stage, one at the bar, two on the sofa and one squatted outside by a barrel and a play area with her hands over her mouth in shock. Lol But we all still looked fabulous.)ย 

WE DON’T PLAY.

I got to chitter with Mel, eye talk with ‘Firmonnell,’ have a dance with ‘Hustle Barbie’ and private convo with ‘Double B.’ (Who still fucking cracks me up.)

What I DID notice is how much my life has actually changed. I didn’t really notice until that night. Lol. I also realized that even though I don’t miss that part of 2017 at all, I do value my individual relationships with them. I prefer meeting them individually. I’ve actually met ‘Firmonnell’ a lot. We actually each have really different relationships with each other.

I also noticed that since my merry absence….they’ve all got skinnier and they’ve all got naughtier…

I absolutely LOVE IT.

These girls areย  living FOR THEM, right now and nothing makes me *sizzle* more!

LIFE IS ABOUT CELEBRATING YOU, YOUR CHOICES, OWNING YOUR PATH AND GETTING HAPPY.

People waste so much time ‘thumb twiddling’ and being concerned over what others think.ย These girls are hilarious. The amount of times I heard…

‘I can do what I want’

…almost made my spine tingle. Lol. I’m a ‘do what I want’ kinda kitten. That’s why we adore each other.ย  I love listening to all their drama. It’s my favourite. And they’d listen to mine, all day, every day! But, right now….my life just seems so easy and peaceful.

Their drama trumps mine ‘errday.’

There was a moment when ‘Hustle’ (who looked beautiful) was perched on the edge of the sofa, that I was sat on, wondering whether the drink, she was drinking, was hers and said…

‘So, how IS everything you? What’s going on?’

And I didn’t know what to say….? And I don’t know why I didn’t know what to say? I just didn’t? Everything’s kinda really great right now and i think I daren’t say it out loud, in case ‘The Gods’ hear and fuck me over.

I’m doing what I love….and it’s accidentally going really well. I think, I’m still safe with that.

I didn’t really do much that night, I just chilled and chatted, because i’d rolled off a hectic week. I ‘caught up’ and stood with wine….But it was great to see everyone, and celebrate ‘Fairytale’ turning 30.

I have some great chick friends. I’m lucky. We make our own choices…Laugh about them. Cry about them…But value each others ways…

Then Sunday morning…

I woke up….

I rolled over in my sheets, grabbed my phone and scrolled through my emails. (I love naked, bed sheeted, kitten rolls, in the morning…as it means, if you have time to do them…. you’re not in a rush…)

Found a random one with ‘Noticed you at Electric Theatre ..Proposal’ย asย the subject title….

So, I clicked on it…and it read…

‘Chrissie

Tonight I noticed you at the electric theatre on a number of occasions at the birthday party.

I crossed eyes with you at the bar, while I was on a break between sets with the band – hope you had a good night out?

Little did I realize until now, that I was looking at a model/blogger from round the corner.

Your blogs are a really good read at first glance …….it says in your blogs that you believe in love at first sight ……well…….?

As they say in Yorkshire , if ya don’t ask ya don’t get…….so I’d be intrigued to know if you noticed me or just wondered why the hell was a guy staring at you…..but I guess you are used to that when you stand out like a sore thumb!

X’

Now, I’ll be honest…and say that I don’t really recall ‘catching eyes’ at the bar, with anyone? All I remember at the bar, where the girls going on about ‘shots per text.’ But I do remember, looking at one of the guys who played in the band, whilst I was on the dance floor, because I was sure that I knew him from somewhere, but couldn’t figure out where?

However, I do love that you sent me that message, as that took a great deal of Goolies….and it’s romantic, it’s sweet. Now, I don’t know whether you read the blog or not? But if you are reading this today…whizz me another email…and we can absolutely go for a drink…ย  a ‘friendly’ as I like to call them. That took loads of balls, and probably a few drinks…and even though I can’t remember the moment…I do actually appreciate your message.

Then as all girls do….the ‘morning after’ group ‘Whatsapp’ was going mental.

First Mel thanked ‘Fairytale’ for inviting her…After moderately bollocking me for ‘sloping off’ without saying bye. ( I love sloping off.) We all told ‘Fairytale’ how great she was and hoped she had a lovely time….Then I plonked in the above email….

…and it all went down hill from there?

‘Who was that?’

Me: ‘I don’t know? I fell in love and didn’t even realise?’

Hustle: ‘I can actually remember most of my night for a change.’

(I had stated that night, that it hasn’t started until ‘Hustle’ has skidded across the floor on her arse.)ย 

‘It was good. I have no beer fear! Lol’

Fairytale: ‘I’m sweating worse than an otters pocket.. and I can’t stop thinking about your bum hole Chrissie.’

Hustle: ‘Chrissie’s bum hole? What did I miss?’

Me: ‘Was I not in the same place as everyone last night? I don’t remember falling in love or my bum hole?’

Fairytale: ‘I’ll say one word…Jonny.’

(Jonny is Fairytale’s boyfriend.)ย 

Me: ‘Jonny, did me up the bum? This just gets worse…’

Double B: ‘Hahaha, I honestly have no idea what’s going on here?’

Fairytale: ‘Jonny pinched my phone…Lol’

Me: ‘It’s too early for this shit…What is going on???’

Then I got saved, because as soon as I placed my phone down on my bed side table, it *pinged* again….

(Whatsapp…Other friends….)

Kate: ‘SO!!! No date happened last night. Lol. BUT I ended up having a date with a different guy in the end by accident!!

Me: ‘Omg! As If. I need to know everything…’

Kate: ‘Lol…What you up too? Meet you at The Carelton in 10…?

What Chu’ Know ‘Bout Me…..???

Morning! Morning! Morning! It’s really busy times in Wunna Land and everything is going delightfully. I’m really happy. Things are great. Yeah…I lost my flipping purse and bank cards…But they’re all cancelled off, new ones are headed my way and just like that….life went back to normal. (Even though my Mum did have to take the children and I out to dinner, because I had no access to funds. ๐Ÿ™‚ ) We Pizza Expressed it and I had actually forgot how great the food is there. I only got the Caesar Salad, however it was remarkable! I could have it everyday!

BUT NOT WITHOUT A BANK CARD!

Yippppppeeeee!

Yes! I’m in a great mood. I’m tinkered over in a magical swirl of happiness. I still feel like the luckiest girl alive….and today, my cheeky little swines…You have a…

‘WHAT CHU’ KNOW BOUT ME’ BLOG!

(I do the ‘What Chu’ Know’ blog every so often, when things are a little too busy with work….You inbox me questions…I give you my honest answers…You get to know me better, (maybe on a more personal level…) and we all slip on our stilettos and sing nursery rhymes, to the beat of utter happiness.

You cool? Get it?

Cue SONG:

What is your real name?

Christina Wunna. People are always shocked that my name is actually ‘Christina’ and I have no clue why?

What part of Asian are you from?

I was born in Yorkshire, but both of my parents are Burmese. Making me 100 percent Burmese through blood.

Have you ever got with a girl?

I’ve kissed a girl…Haven’t we all…and maybe messed around with one, once…..back in my Hollywood days….Yet only because I had a weird ‘swinger’ boyfriend. I actually didn’t enjoy it….But being young, I sort of just experimented with the whole thing…for him. I wouldn’t do that now…. I’m far too sassy…. I know what I want….Yet, I don’t judge people on their sexual preferences….Ours just didn’t match…. Lol.

Did you actually go to Private school?

Yeah I did. Hard to believe I know…Lol I went to Hill House in Doncaster, then Ackworth School in Pontefract. I have Doctor parents, so I ended up there. However, both my children actually go to that school there now. Which is lovely.

Weren’t you scared moving to Hollywood when you were young?

No. I was so excited. I wasn’t even scared of the bad things that happen in Hollywood. As soon as I got into my taxi at LAX, after literally just arriving, the taxi driver turned around and said, ‘I’ll give you $100 for a blow job.’ I just looked at him, laughed, said, ‘Don’t be a dick…no’ and he drove me safely to my hotel, without uttering another word. He was more terrified of me. I hate ‘ugly’ humans. Good try. But you lose.

Would you let your daughter be a glamour model?ย 

Not at all. ๐Ÿ™‚ One rule for me….One rule for her… Lol

Would you ever get married again?

Yes. Fourth time lucky. I’ll get it right this time around. I’m just a slow learner when it comes to love. I wear my heart on my sleeve…and it’s shit. Lol

How long have you been single for?

I don’t know….? I don’t really count the minutes, seconds and years of ‘single’ or ‘together‘ life….I just get on with it…

What is you favourite cocktail?

Too vague a question. I love all cocktails. I can literally drink ANYTHING. So it depends on my mood. But I’m a creature of habit, so when I’m hungover, I will find a Bloody Mary. Or at Ego, I’ll always order a ‘Salted Rimmed Margarita,’ When I’m Ginos…I’ll always have an Espresso Martini….When I’m at Tattu i’ll always order the ‘Skull Candy.’ That’s just the way it goes…I attached drinks to memories…They remind me of men, friends or past dates….

Are you completely different to how you were in your 20’s?

Yeah, I’m completely different. You are or will be too. In my 20’s. I loved the 20 year old version of me. I didn’t care what anyone thought. I just LIVED FREELY AND HAPPILY. I was a wild one….I’m not as WILD now…I’m cheeky, but balanced. I just love fun…It’s in my soul…

What do you hate about yourself he most?

Such a nice question? Lol. I hate my wonky bottom tooth, which I never seem to get fixed and I hate that I can’t ever conquer my love life….It’s like i’m on a slow moving merry go around, just doing the same thing over and over again….without learning…

Saw that you just watched Fifty Shades Darker….When it comes to sex, or you Submissive or Dominant, and also when it comes to your regular personality?

I’m sassy. I’m both. Well, I can ‘play’ both. and get off on both. I love to ‘play’ in the bedroom. I’m naughty but fun. It’s good clean filth. Lol. I’m just feel really confident in the bedroom. Yet, I’m not remotely promiscuous. Loyalty is HUGE TO ME. I wouldn’t like to sleep with lots of different people….When you’re in your 30s, you can’t be arsed with the ‘no hopers.’ I have a one track mind and heart…So when I love someone, I love them madly. But only them…

Personality wise…I’m dominant. Really dominant. I’m a ‘Diva. I might play or try and be submissive at times….But I’m not….By nature….I’m bossy. I know what I want…and hate not getting what I want. ๐Ÿ™‚

Your pics are getting hotter and hotter, do you feel under pressure now that your 37 to look good?

Yes! All the time. It’s stressy. Lol. I have a shoot coming up in a couple weeks in swimwear and looking good for that, has sent me moderately bonkers. But I am vain by nature. I don’t find it a chore to primp. I actually love it.

What are your thoughts on long distance romantic relationships?ย 

I’m fine with long distance relationships. I’m actually really used to them. Most of the guys that i’ve dated have had busy careers, that take them away a lot and my career too, is quite busy…so It’s kinda just the norm. Plus, romantically, i don’t think geography is an issue when you truly love someone…You’d still make it work….if you could be arsed to, or if it was meant to be…

Will you marry me?

Where’s the rock?

Will you marry me…have more kids, cook…clean and be my bed slave, then take me to male chauvinism classes??

No. Simples. Lol

Dinner, what are we eating, where and when?

Lol. Everyone wants to feed me…. I get this question almost 4 times a day, by strangers…

Can I be your slave…?

Noooooo. I’m not a Dom. I don’t get off on humiliating strange men. I once had a guy follow me around G.A.Y in London, begging to be my slave…He literally wouldn’t go away and kept doing everything I told him too…It was so dull….It couldn’t have annoyed me more! My friends were pissing themselves because they said, ‘You’re the only person I know, to go to the bar and come back with a slave.’ย 

Can I spoil you?

No. I hate it when guys say that. Surely real men just spoil you anyway, without having to ask because they want to. If you have to ask a girl that, it means you will never ever do it. I buy my own things. ๐Ÿ™‚

You said you’re back on the tv soon, which show?

Can’t tell you…

Being Asian/Oriental did you find it hard breaking into the glamour modelling industry?

No. I started out in LA and out there, you’re actually at an advantage, because everyone is blond, tanned and beautiful, or brunette tanned and ‘girl next door,‘ meaning they have it a lot tougher, because there’s so much competition. ‘Types’ (as in being ‘asian’) work ALL THE TIME, because there’s really just a handful of you in the entire city and they have to put you in the magazine. Lol.

Do you reckon you’ve met the man of your dreams…?

There is definitely someone who I really fancy right now. In fact, more than fancy….

Do you think you’re a good or bad role model for girls?

I’m not trying to be role model. I just write the diary of my life….The good bits and the bad bits….Sometimes i’m preachy and ‘role model’ like, other times i’m a swine. But that’s what makes me real. That’s what makes me human.

Do you make up the stories on your blog?

Noooooo. Not one piece of it is fabricated. Absolutely every single little bit has truthfully happened….to the point where I even MISS things out, because they’re too inappropriate, or because I don’t want anyone to know. All the people are real…They’ve just been given ‘nicknames’ because then they still have their own sense of privacy, yet can enjoy reading and reliving their piece of the blog without you knowing, who they are.

Over the years, are some of the ‘characters’ you’ve labelled with ‘other names’ and wrote about famous?

Oh God yeah….A lot more than you think.

How do you think your blog has become successful?

Word of mouth. It’s like Chinese Whispers…Someone tells someone, who tells someone else….I’ve met a lot of people in my time…So I guess, a lot of people have accidentally read the blog and just told someone else about it….It’s like a cheeky discovery.

What the most important thing to you?

Ruby & Junior. I don’t value anything more than their journey through life…..I’m a soft mum, so they literally walk all over me….

Love or Money?

Both. I like balance. Lol.

If i were to meet you in person, would I be shocked?

No. ‘Shocked’ isn’t the right word? You might feel awkward at first, But everyone feels a little bit weird, until the first five minutes of ‘pleasantries’ are over…I am SUPER DOOPER GOOD WITH PEOPLE.

Would you have another child?

Yes. I’d have one more…Yet, It’s not something that I NEED to do, as I already have Ruby & Junior. I have my hands kinda full, as a lone parent. So, if I knew that the guy was gonna stick around and we were a whole family and utterly committed…Then ofcourse…yeah. I’m sure parenting is much easier with two of you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When you totally lose ya purse….

Today’s meant to be a ‘What Chu’ Know ‘Bout Me’ blog, where I answer your questions…But it’s not because i’m stressed. Lol.

I’VE LOST MY PURSE!!!!!

I can’t find it anywhere? One minute i’m watching children in Easter bonnets….The next minute, I’m travelling to my first meeting of the day….I’m messaging ‘Miss Murphy’ about ‘Challenge Winning‘….I finally arrive at my destination, unzip my handbag, have a quick reach in….

PURSE ISN’T IN THERE.

*WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*

There’s a positive to all this, I’m sure. I just haven’t found that jolly bit of ‘silver lining’ yet. If you find it, Uber it to me, cos i’m reeeeeaching….

FUCKS SAKE!!!!

I’ve called everywhere, looked most places…I have no one other human to blame it on…Lol..So i’ve decided to be stressed. ๐Ÿ™‚

HURRAH!

How can a day that started off with happy Easter Bonnet watching, turn into ‘Missy No Purse???’ย 

The good thing is that I still have my phone. That’s good, right?? If in doubt, SELFIE IT OUT. AND, i’ve ordered a water….which is also a merry positive, right? No extra calories for meeee.

*WOW. RUN OUT OF SILVER LININGS.*

I have a truck load of meetings today, Ruby has a ‘Play Date’ over after school and later on this evening, I meant to have quick chick drinks…With my imaginary money… ๐Ÿ™‚

Why is life being shit to me?? Lol.

Weirdly, I feel okay now that i’ve had a VENT. I just keep thinking that i’m going to look in my handbag and it’s going to magically appear…because that’s how things happen, right? People keep trying to help me look for my purse, (lol) which I do truly appreciate…

Yet, it’s like when someone asks you for a pen and you know you don’t have one at all, but you pat yourself down anyway….to pretend that you’re attempting to find one. ๐Ÿ™‚

But, I’ll live….(with my water…) I’ve been in worse situations….(Read yesterday’s blog. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

However, I’m off. This was just a quickie. Busy day. Thank you for all your questions. Lots of you have asked me the same thing and it’s always always about my love life….

Keep them coming, I’ll pick through them and answer as many as I can…and i’ll do it absolutely honestly…Unless, I feel like i need to lie. ๐Ÿ™‚ Well, I won’t lie, I’ll just dance around it.

I was actually at an audition last year for a show, (THAT I GOT BTW..;) It just hasn’t aired yet… ) and as I was sat there, the director asked me a string of personal questions, which I’m usually really good at. I’m open. I’m chatty.

However, I think i must not find it easy to answer emotional questions, because whenever he posed a question, he stopped me, after I had confidently rambled on about all sorts, for about 20 minutes. I laughed. I joked. I was open and I dipped it in wit and charm…

Then he *paused* with his clipboard and said,

‘You’ve completely avoided the question…I’ve noticed that you’re really good at doing that….REALLY good at dancing away from answering the things that make you feel uncomfy. You do it so well…But like I said you didn’t answer my question, so i’m going to ask it you again….’

Then I did…

I cried. He cried….and then we pissed ourselves laughing because managed to get ourselves into such an emotional state.

See! Told you it was smarter to AVOID those bits at all costs. ๐Ÿ™‚

Right, i’ve godda go…

Please send me ‘good vibes’ or a purse with all my stuff in it.

Keep sending me your questions…Tomorrow, I’ll answer them in a morning blog…

Kisses,

Chrissie x

 

 

 

 

Spring Cleans, Hollywood & Really Dodgy Fetish Parties ;)

I’m feeling all boated and knackered today, but i’ve got in the bag. My ‘Va Vooms’ on fire and because I feel like the busiest bee in all of the beautiful land…(Bee’s never look that busy to me, they just look like they try and SOUND busy, yet really they just fly around stinging people, whilst being stripey…) However, yes…I am busy with ‘the niggly bits’ the bits I despise. The bits where it comes in really handy, if OTHER PEOPLE do them for you. ๐Ÿ™‚

*PLEASE HELP! HELP AWAY!*

And because I hate all things ‘niggly’ and it’s not wine o clock yet….I stayed really focused and distracted myself ๐Ÿ™‚ by not concentrating, Googling bikinis and instead cleaned three rooms of my home from top to bottom, listening to ‘Little Mix’ in pyjama bottoms and a bra, and making work calls.

If I ever decide to clean my home that intensely from top to bottom…You know that I must be trying to bury my head in the glittery sand. I once threw out a pan and bought a new one simply because I couldn’t be arsed to clean it. ๐Ÿ™‚

It’s like the most boring distraction in the world ever. It’s lame. Don’t do it. Sleeping with Greek men in togas is a good distratcion…Seeing what Michelle Keegan looks like in a bikini is a distraction…Cocktails…Friends, Banter….ANYTHING.

However, Scrubbing and hoovering is NOT! It’s shit. I only did it to burn extra ‘cos i’m bloated’ calories. But now i feel like I need 20 wines…

I have a really busy next 2 weeks…maybe 3 weeks…It’s jammed and at the same time i’m armed with The Wunna Babies. (Ruby squeezed all my Johnsons Baby Lotion of the pink bottle and and filled it up with water. That was fun. That was great! What a beautiful child. Didn’t at all make me want to RIP MY **&&*&*$$ยฃ”””” hair out. ๐Ÿ™‚

Like the time when my LA guy roommate kept trying my clothes on in secret, when I was younger. I’d lay them all out, ready for a night on the razzle. I’d come back, after skipping off to buy wine, to find them inside out, worn…and smelling of sweaty boy. Lol. But much better than the time, I walked back in after late night Hollywood drinks…and found 7 grown up males, in pretend NAPPIES/DIAPERS, drinking beer and dancing in the living room….

I walked in with my best friend, who’s now a really successful film producer..(Good switch from ‘Party Boy’) and all I could hear was them panicking and shouting…

‘FUCK!!! DUDE!!!!! SHE’S FUCKING BACK ALREADY! DON’T LET HER GO UPSTAIRS.’

But me being Me…It weirdly didn’t bother me. Lol. I found it really funny..Plus, nothing is WORSE than having a secret fetish party and having a human, (who’s not part of the fun) *surprise* walk in…Let alone ‘surprise walk in’ and ALSO make you feel SHITTY… (Yet they were in diapers? Lol. I’m ridiculously laid back , when it comes to ‘taboo’ behaviour. I’ve seen so much…that that wasn’t anything really.

Me: ‘My feet hurt, are there anymore drinks…Why are you pretending to be an octopus? I’m going upstairs…’

Random Nappy Dude: ‘That’s Chrissie W’…’

Roomie: ‘Wunna…Yeah. She’s my roommate.’

Random Nappy Dude: ‘AW! FUCKSAKE DUDE!!!’

Roomie: ‘Don’t let her go upstairs! Oh! Hi, Matt!”

(That was my bestie.)

‘Chrissie, you’ve got some mail and that dude you went on a date with…that weird Bodyguard one…dropped your stuff back… Like a belt?’

Me: ‘Does it say *DIRT* on it? Is it that diamante one? He hasn’t even fixed the *Y* on it, has it…What an idiot. I hate dates… I’m just not gonna speak to him..’

And this was all when i was in my mid 20’s, and whilst my roommate was in a pretend diaper…and he was a lawyer. ๐Ÿ™‚

HAHAHA. (Sorry, I’m just pissing myself….. My friend Matt & I did so much better for ourselves…Lol)

Upstairs was awful. Lol. Even I was shocked. I’ve told the story before and it IS embedded in this website…

But yeah…Lol…What I was actually going to say, is that now i’ve told the story…I noticed that the whole random fetish party didn’t bother me at all, yet the guy who decided to try on my clothes, whilst I was out, behind my back, BEFORE I HAD EVEN WORN THEM……

PISSED ME OFF.

So, it must be the little things that wind me up.

But anyway, thank you everyone for reading my blog! I’ve received so many inbox messages from literally all over the world, from ladies, men, girls, guys and saying that they’re loving it, hooked or have just had a first time ‘peek.’

Like ‘Trigg’ had a first time peek yesterday, because he couldn’t follow quite obvious instructions. Lol.

Trigg: ‘I didn’t know I could swipe up?’

Me: ‘What? Even though it says SWIPE UP??’

And a guy from Vienna messaged me this morning saying that he read yesterdays blog and loved it and that HE actually used to work right by me in LA, by The Grove. He has this wonderful Youtube channel about his travels, so I’m gonna check that out today.

Plus, I love that all Ladies, love a ‘school mums’ blog. Unfortunately, I went with diaper ridden fetish party today…But hey…It’s all about balance, right? ๐Ÿ˜‰

I had a moment yesterday, where I stopped a second after being rushed out of a meeting and into a car, where I *paused* and got to chill for a moment….

I sent this message…

‘Missing ya.’

They replied with a..

‘Miss u to xx’

Then life scuttled us along…..

I’ve got lots going on, shoots, influencey things, I’ve got to fit in the time to commit to filming, flights to Spain, meetings, Motherhood…and my friends….

In this Chapter, my newest one…I am being a really shit friend. I went from having all the time in the world, to having no time…Or having to prioritse my time. Plus, I have ‘powers above’ who make me hinder to sacrifices. But I just have to do it. It’s work and i’m building…

But this weekend, it’s my chick friend ‘Fairytales’ birthday drinks…So I’ll be celebrating it with her at The Electric Theatre….

I actually almost forgot, because I had fittings and flights and all sorts of busy mayhem…But Mel reminded me on Monday….I love ‘People Reminders.’ And just like that…I’ll be there!

The Career’s going really well. I’m feeling really confident right now…

I’m gonna SMASH IT.

Cue: FIRE

Mums Night, Wine & Get Me Stepping…

 

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How beautiful is the weather today!!! It’s gorgeous! The suns out, I’m feeling a glimpse of Springtime and well Life just feels dandier, doesn’t it, when we are treated to a jolly bit of ‘shine.’

In fact, i’m kinda glad it was sunny, because I bumped into Keiran (Juniors Dad) during the school run this morning. He was dropping Junior off and for some reason today (it’s his birthday today, but he’s a Jehovahs Witness now and therefore doesn’t celebrate it anymore.. I just didn’t mention birthday anything.)

But he just needed to talk to me today. Not even about anything….He just wanted to chat, talk life, the kids and weirdly reminisce in a carpark…as I waved at other mums.

Keiran: ‘Junior said that you’d been crying. Are you okay?’

Me: ‘When? I’m completely fine. He totally made that up. I haven’t cried at all. Anyway, i’ve got to go..’

Keiran: ‘No..wait….’

I don’t know? I think he must’ve just missed me today, or felt a bit lonely. However, even though i’m happy that we ‘co parent’ Junior, the best way we know how…To me…he’s my EX husband..and it’s done. Years and years ago, there were so many opportunities where he could’ve made it right…but he couldn’t be arsed to.

Luckily that was just how life was supposed to play out for me….

Years flew by, I loved being a single mum, I felt the happiest I had ever been…My career went from strength to strength..and NEVER in a million, trillion, gzillion, years… even if it was drenched in wine and came with kittens, cold hard cash, with a cherry on top, would I ever even consider getting back with Keiran.

It’s done. I like that we only ‘co parent’ now. But I’m polite…So I took in the sunshine and chatted for 30 minutes before zooming off…

I’m in a good mood today. Yesterday ended up being fabulous. I bumped into my friends Kate and Hairdresser Claire. It was kinda did that I did, because they had wine and I had managed to accidentally get myself wedged into a funeral party.

Don’t ask.

I just sorted of looked up all ‘dolly eyed‘ and found a funeral around by accident…

20 minutes later…Kate & Hairdresser Claire rock up and sweep me to one side, as they contemplated the ‘Hunters Chicken.’

Me: ‘I’m off to Spain soon and I have to look good in a flipping bikini.’

Kate: ‘You always post selfies in no clothes…You already look good.’

Me: ‘No. I mean I have to look really good.’

Claire: ‘Well you’re doing really well with that Peroni in front of you. Lol.’

Then we chatted about glamourously trashing hotels, how Claire should’ve been my ‘in Spain’ hairdresser, how all parties should have tattooists and how Kate still needs cigs even though she’s vaping. Lol

I learnt a bit more about Kate yesterday. I learnt that under her tough sassy banter…She is VERY MUCH a girl.. (I’m the same way. That’s why I could spot it.)

Then we talked about stalking people and ran off to do school runs…

I love being a girl.

Rushing, gathering children, sushi and madness occurred then. Yet, I still felt like the happiest human in the world? I just got on with it and loved it.

I was excited yesterday because that evening, a group of Mum’s (our children are all in the same class at school,) I think there were about 10 of us? (I’m shit at counting. It takes too long.) Anyway, we had all arranged to meet at Ego for 7.30pm for dinner and a couple drinks.

I LOVE MEETING NEW PEOPLE. I’m highly social. I find it fun. And like I said, we see each other daily, yet just in passing, with a child in tow or a dash to work sprint on…We’ve always made ‘pleasantries’ but we’ve never really created an opportunity to get to know one another.

Rupert’s Mum did last night…and with what felt like a single *Blink* ….Day had now turned to Night, it was around 7.11pm…and I found myself with ‘Miss Murphy’ squatted down, outside Ego rummaging through handbags like savages, to see if we could AT ALL, in ALL OF THEย  ENTIRE LAND… find a lighter. Lol.

YOU CAN NEVER FIND ONE WHEN YOU ACTUALLY NEED ONE.

‘Can you find yours?’

‘No.’

‘Wait, I think I have one in the car…’

‘No…Hang on…i’ve found one…’

Plus, I ruined her phone conversation too…even though she very politely told me I didn’t.

It was already a fun night and it hadn’t even begun…

Unfortunately for me, I thought I was early, but by the time i walked in…everyone was already there, sat comfortably, with drinks….. waiting!

Me: ‘Oh! Sorry! I thought I was early. Lol’

Miss.Murphy: ‘Have you all been waiting a really long time?

‘Nooooo….’

Miss. Murphy: ‘So, you have then…Lol.’

We were all shown to our table and just like that, these ladies who I see every single day, yet never really find chance to speak to, all did dinner and that means a lot because we’re all busy women, some career women, some who dash around holding the family together. We’re all ages, all sorts, all types, from all different walks of lives.

Our children go to a nearby Private school (infact the school I went to as a child) and well, there’s only 10 children in their entire year…Meaning our kids are gonna grow up to be really close….So we might as well have white wine spritzers and get to know one another…As we have YEARS of our babies growing…

It was such fun, yet civilized, evening and great banter, chitter chatter, laid back life talk and a great night of just opening up and letting other ladies, at the table peek into YOUR life a bit more…because it’s always ‘steady’ at first, isn’t it?

Karen: ‘Do your kids do any out of school activites…’

Me: ‘No. Ruby asked if she could join Brownies and I just said *NO* lol.’

Miss.Murphy: ‘They eat out a lot…. That’s what they do. Lol.ย  I said No to Beavers.

There were talks about work, bald pigs, camper vans, wood worm, beavers, money, horses, great places to dine, ice skating, boat hotels, botox, boarding school and late teas…

(Unless you have a child in the school, you will not understand the JOY of the schools ‘Late tea’.)

Me: ‘By the time they’re get to the first year of Senior school, they’ll all be boarders, even though we all only live up the road. Lol.’

We’re all really lucky! And our babies are really lucky. We’re all really different. But a great set of mums!

I like a group of successful women. It makes me smile. So it was actually wonderful to sit, banter and sip white wine spritzers with them…

It was actually a breath of fresh air. Everyone was really honest. Everyone laughed. Some were loud. Some were quiet. Other’s wished for more wine and as I scanned the table, I was really happy that we all, for a moment, valued each other enough to take the time to do dinner. ( I mean, today I have a stack of work to get through. Another Mum has three different teas to arrange. Another Mum has a flight to catch for work this morning..)ย 

Yet, we made it to dinner… (Probably because we knew there was wine.)

I can’t wait to do it again….

Great night!

I’ve got to dash because i’m doing my Sport Relief steps today throughout work, and i’ve been sat on my arse for the last 30 minutes…instead of stepping. (You need to Download the Sport Relief App today and start having each step you take count towards the nations ‘Billion Step ‘Challenge,’ to help change lives. Joe Wicks is doing it. Davina’s doing it. Man U are doing…Everyone’s doing it. I’ve only taken 712 steps today. Lol.

Godda Go! Godda Go! I’ve got to arrange my flights and bikinis for Spain. (Business…Not just pleasure.)

Lots of love,

Chrissie (I always look moody on my ‘no clothes’ pics.)

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When guys are like…………

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I’m in such a GOOD MOOD today!!! I’m like a juicy little bubble berriedย  with excitement. You could justย *squeeze* me and I’d *POP* confetti, with *squeaks* of laughter and shrieks and ‘ooh laa.‘ Then champagne showers would simply start roaring out of nowhere, as let’s face it it’s Wunna Land. Glasses would be poured.ย  ‘Handsomes‘ would be winking…. and I would just strut forward, knowing that my version of life just seems to be getting better!

To be fair, after that really shit 2013…or was it 2014? I’ve blanked out deliberately. Lol. One of those years was SHOCKING. After that point…MY LIFE, just changed and I became the luckiest chick ever.

Then at the beginning of 2017 my mentality changed…new people entered Wunna Land. I became closer to people who I never knew I would be so close to….Then my life changed again…and Right now,because I whopped out that sassy Wunna ‘Gusto’ and decided to justย  do the things that made me happy, without fear…2018 has ended up (so far) being one of the best years of my life….

YIPPPPPPPPeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEE!

I’m in the most wonderful mood, for no real reason and it’s fantastic because I feel ALIVE! I’m ‘happy go lucky’ by nature. I’m the frill in ya twisters. The *pop* of that champers spray. I’m giddy…I’m great. I’m like a little girl, that’s filled with charm….I’m celebrating life and no one can stop me. And the most wonderous thing about my Tuesday, is the simple the fact that today…I have NO PRESSURE! I’m freeeeeeeeeeee!

So, I’m feeling like a Winner! ( Chicken! Chicken! Dinner!)

To me ‘balance’ย is one of the most important things that I measure when it comes to success. (I nearly typed ‘ ‘when it comes to sex‘ then. Lol. How ‘Cougar‘ of me. I can’t wait until my ‘Cougar’ days kick in. I CAN REALLY. I’D HATE IT. After financially and emotionally looking after every single man in the entire world, that Cupid has FORCED me to date…or Life has MADE me cross paths with….A little lost boy, with no job, is not gonna make my wish list. Ever. And I don’t even care. Lol. I can like what or who I want….

At this point in my life, I very much want to be taken care of emotionally, mentally, physically and by a grown up man that I don’t have to pay for. That’s always good, isn’t it! And i’ve noticed that the more successful I’ve become, the more ‘lost little boys, with no job‘ come a knocking.

‘Meal tickets are the other way…Nope…No…Wait…Turn around…A bit to the left…Oh yeah and keep on walking darling…Don’t look back now, you cheeky little thing. Wunna land’s door is FUCKING SLAMMED….beautifully shut. ๐Ÿ˜‰ย  Oh the kids are swearing at you, from the rosy tinted windows.’

What has happened to men?

I mean, the ‘Little Lost Boy’ aside….It doesn’t take much to value your girl, guy, wife, partner or fancy piece and treat her with both respect…AND like a Princess! ๐Ÿ˜‰

ITS NOT THAT HARD!

I mean my guy friend, the other day was moaning about howย  we chicks are all ‘trying to be independent’ now….(He took a chick out on a date, made her pay for THEIR meal and then ‘boned’ her in the back of a car.)

Romance is alive….Shakespeare couldn’t have written it better himself.

We girls have always been independent. Not only have some of us wanted to be. But we’ve also HAD to be.

I’m adventurous and fun by nature. I moved to LA by myself as a kid to chase dreams. That’s my ‘WANTING to be’ independent streak. But my ‘HAVING to be‘ independent streak is still utterly alive, because i’m a lone parent of two little babies…I’m Mum, I’m Dad, I’m Love, I’m Money. I’m everything!

At first that wasn’t by choice. Yet now….It’s great and it’s made me feel powerful… and if I love anything, I love feeling powerful. Lol.

It’s a turn on. (Sick I know.) But I go for that in guys also? I have no clue why, other than sickness? However, yes, I’m totally turned on by it….BUT ONLY IF THEY HAVE A BEAUTIFUL SOUL AND RESEMBLE A DELICIOUS PIECE OF EYE CANDY. ๐Ÿ™‚ (Meaning not some big grizzle, ancient years older than me, evil pervert, with 22 beer bellies and a boner.)

I like a well rounded, fun, loyal, loving man. The ‘power’ things is only a sexual turn on. I don’t want you to get it twisted. Lol. It’s not an essential trait that they need. Lol. In the bedroom…I’d find that REALLY SEXY. But like I said, they have to be of the ‘handsome’ variety…You can call me ‘shallow’ for that….and…well..I won’t care. Lol. It’s what I fancy.

Everyone loves eye candy. Some people just like to look at eye candy. I like to find eye candy, with an amazing personality, that would make a good hubbster …and just make him MINE. ๐Ÿ™‚

Italiano: (My LA Friend..) ‘She pretty much grew up in Hollywood around a bunch of guys. We were all roomates. Models, actors, lawyers, agents… But it was definitely ALL guys and Chrissie…So she kinda picked up a Hollywood dudes mentality when it comes to dating… And it’s fucking awesome. She was the best roomie I ever had!’

(We all just had so much fun. I cannot even beginย to TELL you the stories. But they’re scattered throughout my blog… through the years….I loved that at 20, we could just show up to an audition, do really bad at it and then simply say ‘Fuck it’ go to The Standard, order 4 poolside strawberry margaritas and make ourselves feel better, before our next audition.)

I’ve gone on a flipping tangent!

What was I even on about? Balance? Or things I like i guys? I forgot about it all, because I was too busy *bobbing* away with cocktails at ‘The Standard.’

When it comes to men…their spirit needs to play well with mine. I want them to be my best friend. They have to be a family man. I have kids. They are part of my package. I love a laugh. I love a thoughtful person. I love sexy. I LOVE SEXY. Smart. Vain. I love ‘good times.’ But I love to chill and even if I fancy treating myself to utter glamour pussy, dressed ‘to the nines’ luxury, (which I adore,) I also love to just slum it and banter in my comfies…with a takeout.

When it comes to ‘balance’ true success to me, is when someone has everything…Happiness, health, wealth, a career they love, their dream partner, maybe even a family…and it’s all easy and all beautiful.

When I see a man who has that…I see him as ‘Successful.’

(I mean, what’s the point at winning at ONE thing, if during that time, you managed to lose everything else….?)

I learnt that early on in life in LA, when I was about 23. It was a very hard ‘learn.’ Hahaha. I cried a lot for a while…then cried over useless wilies….;)

Throwback convo….Do it in your best American accent….

Christine: ‘What the fuck is up with her…?’

Theo: ‘It’s fine, leave it. She’s crying over a penis…’

I can’t be bothered to write anymore…I need an afternoon tipple…Or an adventure with friends! I met my good friend ‘House of Solo’ Magazines, ‘Big A’ yesterday. He’s on a diet and with an orange juice, showed me all the people he was booking for the front cover of his magazine. This was at Ego…(which is like my local bar.)

BUT…

I’m excited, because I’m actually at Ego this evening for dinner and drinks, with all the Mum’s of Ruby’s class/year…whatever you want to call it. It’s great because we’ve never really hung out with each other before. We only ever see one another in passing…So, it will be really lovely, to just sit down, eat, drink and be merry, and get to know some faces that I pretty much see everyday!

That’s tonight!

Kisses,

Chrissie. x

 

Flashbacks, Fifty Shades & My Flipping Love Life

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I keep doing this thing where I wake up at around 3am in the morning, because I can’t sleep? I sleep naked and so I’ll moan that i’m chilly, step out of bed, not remember to grab a tshirt and instead unplug my phone (priorities)ย  and just get back into bed. Then i’ll start to Google everything. Literally anything. Lol. Before I get back into bed, I’ll look in the mirror to see if I look okay, whilst it’s still dark, yet turning into morning??? Why do I do that!!?! No one’s there but ME!!!???!! I’ll Google search until I’m tired. Am I a lunatic? That seems a pretty safe option. ๐Ÿ˜‰

I did watch ‘Fifty Shades Darker’ before I went to bed….which probably didn’t help, as I have to psycho analyse everything that torments me…:) I dreamt about it all night and then found myself Googling ‘Sadists’ incase I knew any? Lol. Everyone I know is now a sadist or a psychopath. That’s what I came up with ๐Ÿ™‚ and then Iย  just fell asleep, until my kitten woke me at six clock, via the fine art of paw tapping, to make sure I was up to do get Ruby ready for school.

All the way to the school run, life moments kept flashbacking at me, during my drive. My mind went back almost 10 years and for a second, it shot to a time, where I was dating Boyband Jonny, it was late afternoon, we were having a difficult time in our relationships, yet I didn’t know why? He was expressive because he was a creative. Yet, closed off emotionally, because…I’m gonna go with….he was an Aquarian? Lol. (Aquarian’s always find me.)

Anyway, (and this was almost a decade ago) i stepped into a black cab in the middle of Camden, where he was living, which would take me back to Kings Cross, so I could shimmie back onto Northern Soil…and before my cab left, he came running down the street, in his skinny jeans, up to the window and passed me a note. I smiled, waved and the car drove away.

During my journey, I opened the folded hand written note and it read…

‘Dear Chrissie,

I know I never show it…and i’m sorry for that. But I want you to know that whenever i’m with you, my heart lights up.’

(It’s strange that he could never tell me, and had to write it. But I appreciated that anyway, because any expression is good expression, right?)

Then my *flashback* stopped… I was still en route to Ruby’s school drop off. (Boyband Jonny is actually gay now and exceedingly happy and settled. He may not have become the Boyband Superstar that he always wanted…But he openly found his happy place, which not only is MORE important…Yet also makes me beam.)ย 

But anyway, I was driving away, ‘Happy as Larry,’ chatting to Ruby in the car…I get to the big Ackworth roundabout and my mind begins to race again and this time it takes me to this time last year….

‘The Swirl.’ย 

It took me to a moment where we were both laid in a bed…his bed, everything was peaceful and it was probably around 11pmish. We’d just watched ‘Britains Got Talent’ and then a round of ‘Celeb Juice,’ before showers in separate bathrooms and night time. I remember him looking at me, saying ‘Things with you are just easy… and after I agreed, we fell asleep that night holding hands.

Then my mind *WHIZZED* me back, almost like it didn’t want me to settle upon that thought. It took me to earlier that day, where ‘The Swirl’ and I were sat on a pale lemon sofa…(which he kept assuring me he didn’t pick..)

‘It was already here when I moved in…’

It made me notice how particular & creative he actually was. (He’s an Aquarian also! They find me.) I noticed a lot of things about him that afternoon…and I loved that, because I adore nothing more than learning about people….simply by observing them… merrily. I’m like a sponge. I’ll take in EVERYTHING.

But anyway, my mind took me to us being sat on this sofa together. We were chilling and watching tv. I made fun of something. He made fun of it also and almost innocently we both burst into this silly banter of laughter. I remember looking at him when he laughed, which made me smile.ย  I also remember him looking at me when I was laughing, yet when I turned to face him, (as I could feel his eyes on me,) he turned his head away quickly.

Then my *Flashbacks* stopped.

Just like that i was at Ruby’s school…and my normal day had begun.

What is going on with my mind, right now? Both happy moments. Both loving memories.

Yet, I have noticed in love, that I am always in the same place.

I achieve everything work wise. I’m a great mum…I’ve developed with Ruby & Junior threefold. I adore being Mum.It’s not always easy, but I can do it on m own and it has been my greatest gift…my life saver. I dance to New Chapters always because i’m not scared of them. I’m not scared of anything. I’m irrepressible. (My Geography teacher used to always say that about me at school. Lol.)

I’m a life warrior and probably one of the most emotionally together chicks I know! It’s almost like nothing can sort of break me down, because i’ve grown so much, after failing at shit, winning at shit, being broken, yet getting back up each time, with a SMILE ON MY FACE. I feel unbreakable. It’s powerful. It radiates from me…and in a way, i wish every woman felt like that. ( My close chick friends are actually all like that…Well, most of them anyway. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

During my time in Hollywood, I went through SO much. I had the best time definitely, but. I was in my 20’s growing up in LA. There were both good and bad moments, that I never have EVER told anyone anything about…because i’ve never wanted to. But i’ve experienced life and walked lots of different paths. At 20 it was hard. At 37, it’s now such a blessing.

That’s why I always say it is MUCH MUCH BETTER for someone to come into success, fortune, or fame as a 30 something or older, than it is as a young one….As like with love, you can handle it with a better perspective without getting carried away with the bullshit. (I never get carried away with the bullshit…even if it looks like I am, or have. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

However, when it comes to my love life…Like I said earlier…I am always in the same place…

..and it’s been that way since I was 19.

I don’t get it?

I KNOW what I want and I don’t always get it. (And i’ll never just settle.) I know what I do NOT want and that is anything that is emotionally challenging…Things should come easily….At 37, I don’t want to be dealing with issues….I just want to gallop around to the sound of happiness and true love.

I believe in boys chasing girls…The ‘old school’ tactics. It shows that they’re confident and it’s not dipped in arrogance. It shows that they’re not scared of love. It’s easy and uncomplicated.

I believe in honest expression..without that you don’t have anything. You might as well be a cardboard cut out. (I once watched one of my guy friends, make potential girlfriends *jump through hoops* to win his affection. He expected them to guess how he was feeling? I never understood why? It taught me a lot about him. He had his own issues. I accepted him for who he was, as he was one of my guy besties and I didn’t ever have to date him. Lol. Yet I always hoped those chicks quit ‘jumping.‘ He wasn’t THAT MUCH of a prize. ๐Ÿ™‚

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I believe in love. I always believe in love. And I hope you do tooo!

So let’s hope that a decade from now….when i’m flipping 47. I won’t be telling you that i’m still in the same place…

But if I am…I’m sure i’ll still be happy…. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Chrissie x

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Let’s Not Judge & Bubblegum Bed Spreads

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I’ve slept on Bubblegums, so bare with me….Not sure what’s exactly happened, but my kids managed to place small round multi coloured bubble gum balls, under my flat sheet….? It was like ‘The Princessย  The Pea’ but much much shitter and not very royal. Swearing happened. I mean before I had to film yesterday afternoon, I took the children to go watch ‘Peter Rabbit’ at the cinema yesterday morning….(I like to be away from the crowd) and Ruby complained because he VIP Box Seat wasn’t a bed???? What am I raising? Junior’s cool. Ruby is SO high maintenance that even i’m cringing.

It’s weird how we label people right? And even though we always state that we are hardly ever judgmental, by any means….We still judge…don’t we? And we shouldn’t. But it’s just life….innit.

If you know me personally, you’ll know that I’m probably one of the most easy going chicks around. I’m easy breezy, laid back and yeah I’ll strop when I’m hormonally imbalanced, or feel something with a ‘fire’ in my soul…I can be a ‘Diva.’ Yet, 90 percent of the time…I’m cool. I’m swag. Like you’ve got to be a proper TWAT for me to dislike you.

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Recently, I’ve been really busy with work and i’m really happy about that because it’s all I’ve ever wanted. I feel really lucky and i’m counting every single ONE of my sassy little blessings. I’ve worked really hard and it feels good to look back and kinda notice achievement. It sends a buzz through me. Almost like a love buzz. I am in a VERY NEW CHAPTER. It did start earlier, towards the end of last year, with work…HOWEVER, it takes time for change to sink in…and now I can feel this CHAPTER and it is BRIMMING with excitement.

However, on Monday….was it Monday? No….Wednesday. NO wait. It was flipping THURSDAY. Lol. On Thursday, I’d stopped off for a quick ‘boozy’ treat at one of my locals. Kate and Claire had rocked up with wine in their hands, so naturally, they parked themselves at a table that had a ‘Wunna’ parked upon it and we had THE BEST BANTER OF A NATTER EVER. It was wonderful and I really felt ALIVE.

Wine was poured, laughter was out loud and we just talked shit for HOURS. We talked guys, sex, girls, diets and life….We had this discussion on how important it was for women to still feel feminine as they got older. How we should always still have ‘girl’ fun and be treated well by gents and even though we can be feisty, most of the time we’re submissive…as men are the more selfish sex. The best girls are independant and work their own sense of self. Like i’ll still be doing my face at 80 and thinking i’m ‘da bomb.’ ๐Ÿ˜‰

It was such a great afternoon, that we didn’t ever want it to stop. If we didn’t have responsibilities…(The shit thing about being 30 something) it would’ve gone on FOREVER. I would’ve turned 90 and died of laughter at that table, dripped in vino.

But Claire and I have actually known each other for years…in passing. Everyday she walked passed me. Everyday I walked passed. Everyday we said nothing to each other.

Kate: ‘Yeah, she was really shocked when she hung out with you the other day..as she had such a laugh, and didn’t think you were like that…She said she used to see you all the time, but thought you’d never speak to her…’

Claire: ‘WHAT I SAID was, that I used to look at Chrissie, tottering up all glam in her heels and hair and looking all sexy and just thought, she’ll just look at me and think….’

Me: ‘I used to look at you and think that I better not say anything because she’ll just think i’m some kind of bimbo.’

(Claire’s all tattooed, edgy and cool looking….I just thought she wouldn’t be arsed with someone like me…)ย 

She was saying that just because she has tattoos people often think she’s EVIL, or worships the Devil…And I was saying that everyone already seems to have an opinion of me…Yet from an Oriental girl point of view, if I just randomly find myself stood next to a guy, or an old man at a bar….People will automatically think we’re dating, that i’m a ‘Thai Bride’ or I need a visa. Lol.

Kate: ‘She’s from Doncaster.’

Anyway, The funniest thing was, that on THURSDAY we found out that we were really similar and that we actually got along really really well. So, I’m utterly happy that I sat down on Thursday afternoon, for my ‘boozy treat’ and the rocked up with their bottle of vino.

I’m social by nature. I’m chatty. I’m easy to get along with. But we’re sometimes scared to say ‘Hi’ to new people, right? Or too scared to learn about the new people, that have entered our newest chapter….

We shouldn’t always be…(and I am often cautious because within seconds…andย  if i’m too friendly… a semi circle of utter testosterone floods my path of glamour and before you know it they’re talking at me, with ‘wild’ in their eyes and a boners that suggest a distinct lack of control. Lol)ย 

So, the message of the day is to refrain from labeling others….then making a judgement based upon that label. We chose our own versions of life, our own jobs, paths, our own looks and our own way to success, love and family….

That what makes us humans ACE.

ps/ I’m flipping over this snow. I keep watching everyone’s Instagram Stories and is everyone in the world just in Dubai right now? Or are holiday’s there on the cheap? It’s pool party this, swimwear brunch that…

PLEASE LORD GIVE ME SUN.

Pork Chops, Guinness, Herbalife & The Art of DOING YOU

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Kate: ‘But having a pint of Guinness is the equivalent to having a pork chop. There’s a pork chop in every pint!’

Me: ‘Why have I even sat here?’

Claire: ‘Haha..I know, she…’

Me: ‘Why is she ruining lives? She’s not even listening to me. She’s texting.’

Kate: ‘I’m Googling it.

Me: You’re ruining lives…’

Kate: ‘So, 4 cans of Guinness, is like having 4 pork chops. A pork chop in each pint… I don’t even know why you’re bothered, when have YOU EVER had a pint of Guinness????’

Me; ‘I’ve had a Guinness before. As if I haven’t. I had a baby one once too, and…’

Kate: ‘Ooh, there’s a song. Do you want to learn the Guinness/Pork Chop song?’

Claire: ‘She’s probably gonna leave now. I need a gin. I love a gin. It’s the only drink I can drink an entire litre of and feel fine on. Yeah, my head’ll hurt a bit, but I can just get on with it.’

(I love a Northern girl. We just get on with it… Well…apart from me, because i’m DRAMATIC.)

I’m a glamour puss, so i’m sure that means I get away with it? PLUS, because i’m a ‘glamour puss,’ I don’t want to hear what the meat equivalent to every single drink is…I want to hear about boys and diamonds. Pork chop song! Lol. I don’t learn songs like that. I listen to swag dudes, who ‘came in a black Benz and left in a white one.’

Sassy K: ‘Hi…I’m just reminding you that your children are due for pick up in half an hour.’

Thank the Lord for ‘Sassy K.’ I love a reminder. I need ‘people reminders‘ around me always. She’s becoming my favourite human.

How you all feeling? It’s sunny in Yorkshire today! Is it where you are? It feels like Spring. Always makes me feel better. I need sun. I need a holiday. I want one…now. Get me bobbing around a pool in an inflatable with a fruit cocktail immediately. I want to ‘CTRL ALT DEL‘ stress and just pool bob.

I’m still doing my Herbalife shakes and i’ve actually lost weight. I think i’m a week in and i’ve lost around 4 lbs, I’d say…and my jeans are looser. It’s not difficult, it’s just somewhat difficult for me, due to my lifestyle and my career, lets say. I have a job where in which I’m always invited or requested to cocktail and dine all over the place…for the blog..and it’s not like I can rock up with my shaker and start scooping strawberry powder. It’s bad manners.

But regardless. I’ve managed to do it, the best way I can, in order for it to fit into Wunna Land and my schedule and yeah…First week…i’ve done alright.

Do I get a prize yet? 30 days feels like ages…

At the weekend, i’m filming the advert for CHRISSIEWUNNA.COM. I’m excited for it and hoping to just smash it out quickly, as I have my chick besties birthday that evening in Leeds…which will include, good times and drinking.

Someone from Hong Kong has just rang me? Who’s in Hong Kong? I don’t know anyone who goes to Hong Kong, except ‘London Business Man’ and well we’re not speaking to one another, so it’s not him.

If I could say anything to you today, it would be that you KNOW you’re worth, BE IT in love or work. Don’t sell yourself short. People will sometimes try and make you. They’ll tinkle their fancies and tonker their widdles. Yet, the choice you should always make is the mighty one.

Don’t sell yourself short. Be treated the way you WANT to be treated.

I also had a guy friend of mine walk into a room and sigh. When I asked him what the problem was he just said..

‘I hate it here.’

From what i’ve learnt from my 37 years so far, is that YOU KNOW when you’ve had enough. You’re body, heart or mind will tell you when you’re done….We forget to listen to our souls, don’t we? I’m a really determined person. I don’t ever do what I don’t want to do. And some may call me a ‘diva’ for it…But I don’t care…It’s my choice, my life.

So just as much as I love a ‘people reminder.’ I’m just reminding you to take care of your life and live it the way you’ve always imagined.

Right that’s all now. Kate (who was talking about Pork Chops) has just walked in with a friend…

I’m off to be social.

Thank you for following my life…

Chrissie x