So, I kinda left my ‘Inadequate Chris’ meeting to dash up the street from La Bottega Milanese to Gino’s Leeds. I’m already late. I’m already dashing. I hate being late. I really hate dashing. I’m checking my phone, as each chick friend of mine is whizzing through a message to Wunna Land. I’m only half reading them and typing back any kind of rubbish. Lol. Then I stopped! You need to stop…..
I kinda realised that Gino’s was literally 7 steps away from La Bottega Milanese. Clever me! *Up here for thinking! Down there for dancing!* I was outside the ever so glamourous palace in almost a dazzling jiffy…so I checked my phone properly to actually read the messages. Such a good friend! 😂
LUCKILY, I have friends that are shit at time keeping also! ‘Double B’ was still en route but stuck in traffic, as ‘J’ drove her to Gino’s in her sassy leaf green, diamante rimmed Mercedes. ‘Hustle Barbie’ was all…
‘Where are you? Are you there now? I’m walking up..’
Mel and ‘Fairytale’ were getting a ride into the city by Prince Jonny. It was probably the most awkward ride ever, as ‘Fairytale’ and Prince Jonny had delighted in some fierce ‘anniversary’ ROW, where storming out, tears and tantrums occurred. Mel had been out until five o clock in the morning and was definitely still pissed. She sat in the tense car, trying to make conversation and break the ice…all the way into the city….all the way to Gino’s. Mel’s ace because like Me, she can be really pissed and still have the most glamourous manners. (Well sort of. You should hear some of the stories. Lol)
Anyway, I’m messaging everyone as i’m walking up towards my favourite Italian/Prosecco haunt (I go all the time, I’ve met D’Acampo) and Lord knows what happened?? Stunning little ‘IT Girl’ me, must tripped over my own stiletto, mid looking at myself through some glass window and FELL ONTO THE PAVEMENT ONTO MY ACTUAL FACE, outside D’ACAMPOS! My bag flew out my hand, I grazed my knee, which now had a fake tan smear on it and my right eyelash fell off. That’s what I call glamour!
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!
I have serious problems if I can’t manage to get my kitty self from Bottega to Gino’s safely. I think it was because I was sober. If I had a cocktail in my hand, i honestly would’ve been fine.
Anyway, I pick myself up, like the fall never happened, laugh it off TO MYSELF, like an absolute fucking lunatic (as there’s literally no one around me,) I swing through the most glamourous glass revolving doors, which is the magical gateway into Gino’s My Restaurant in Leeds (and they definitely are magic, as you push into the place feeling all bustled and stressed from city life and push out of the place feeling blessed, sexy and like every Italian God has filled up your chilled Prosecco glass, told you you’re beautiful and offered you a ‘night cap’ after a kitty romp. 😉 )
As SOON as I get through the revolving glass doors and i’m finally on to the otherside of life, around 11 minutes late…I’m greeted by the WARMEST smile, the sexiest looking girl, who immediately know who I am, why i’m there, what time i’m meant to be there, takes my coat, calms my soul, explains that I have a ‘friend’ already waiting for me downstairs, that has been given the restaurant/bar card and is having a drink, as she waits for the rest of us.
It’s like she solved all my life problems with a wink.
I smile, I’m happy, I can’t WAIT for a chilled prosecco, i’m excited to do lunch with the girls, at my favourite place in Leeds…as we were also still doing the ‘live’ text thing for ‘Chrissie in the City.’ But as I walked down the spiral staircase by a wall of delicious wines and black and white photos of D’Acampo, swirled in baby blue, glass, light and a stylish, sexy but family ambience, (the air feels fresh in that place,) I was kinda shitting myself because I was late to my own THING and if it was Mel at the bottom of the stairs, I was FUCKED.
So, I did that creepy, peepy bent over thing, as I tried to see who it was…and as I was half way down the stairs with the glorious Prosecco bar directly infront me (it was literally like reaching the pearly ‘Italian’ gates of Heaven’) I just saw her *beam*…as she turned her head around slowly with her sassy, blond hair, jeans, heels and glammy top, with a chilled glass of the finest Italian bubbles in her hand and a ‘Hiiiii!’
Ofcourse! The only one who managed to make it there exactly on time, with everything organised, a drink in her hand, my restaurant tab card sorted, a smile on her face and a drink already being poured for me, in the coldest most stylish glass, by some hot looking manager. DREAM!
(Do note: I had only been there 7 minutes, and ALREADY the SERVICE had been IMPECCABLE. I’m a SERVICE girl. I mean I go all around and get invited to every place/event/hotel etc in all the land and I don’t care how great the food, the cocktails, the atmosphere is…IF THE SERVICE IS A BAG OF SHIT BALLS. The thing about Gino’s is that the service is not only INCREDIBLE, it’s sexy. It’s warm. I mean the staff there make you feel SO special that they could mess up, through champers all the way down your top, accidentally trump and then STILL CHARM their way out of it! Lol But it’s not fake. It’s a friendly, cheeky, stylish bit of service. It’s so inviting that it’s almost like they know you, they’re your best friend. They want you to have a great time, will create that ‘great time’ and will then join you in your ‘great time.’ I’m not joking…my friends and I..that particular afternoon were treated LIKE ABSOLUTE ROYALTY!)
‘I fucking fell down ON MY FACE outside!! YES! ON MY ACTUAL FACE! Hahaha! Wait, i need to glue my eyelash back on….Wait! You look amazing! Aw! Thanks! I needed that drink! LOOK at my knee! I’ve actually GRAZED IT! Haha. Thank you so much for organising it all. I’m so late!’
‘I was starting to get lonely being the only one here, but i’ve taken care of everything…HAHAHA…AS IF YOU FELL ON YOUR FACE!’
And just like that the magic started, as each one of my little glamour pussy friends began tinkering in, as Firmonnell and I kicked back and enjoyed our Prosecco at Gino’s. ‘Hustle Barbie’…
‘You know that i just panicked and stood in the revolving door thing because I didn’t know how to work it and didn’t know why it wasn’t moving! Lol. I mean, I didn’t want to look like an idiot..but…’
Hahaha! I love that she couldn’t figure out that she may have to exert her beautiful self and *push* the door. Lol. But fuck, we’re glamour pusses, we don’t push things…we PULL. 😉 Lock up your sexy sons!
But yes, one by one my best chick friends kept appearing around me at the Prosecco bar with drinks in their hands, banter, smiles and previous night stories…(Again, Mel showed me a comedy bruise at the bar and i can’t even tell you about it. Haha.) We were stood, relaxing, having our drinks topped up without a single prompt…then Giuseppe came to join us. I LOVE Giuseppe! He’s so much fun!
To be honest….that’s probably when the Good times rolled…
Everyone loves a bit of Giuseppe. He’s sexy, fun, stylish, evil, yet hilarious, loves the ladies and with his ‘Head Of…’ title knows how to charm us, prosecco with us, make us feel WONDERFUL and at the same time as very much being in charge ( I watched him hawk eye the staff to make sure every human in that place was being looked after) he kicked back, poured himself a drink and had fun with us! That’s good service!
He made us feel special! He’s the ideal guy to push the Gino brand. You don’t get service like that anywhere. But yes, we talked about all the new openings, the new prosecco bars, we went through the menu, her asked me about what I thought was great about places, he chatted to us about our lives and our App and the show…We poured endless drinks, laughed like our sexy Italian souls were free and our pants were down, then like The Queens of Absolute Sheeba, we were escorted upstairs to our table.
I loved that our table was in the mix of it all…as sometimes when you’re VIP..ing it you sometimes get secluded away, to make you feel wonderful. That’s great in clubs and bars. But in restaurants and a place like Gino’s you want the best seat in the house, amongst all the life, all the the bustle…it’s part of the magic.
We were literally in a *bubble.* We were literally being treated and tinkered like we were the most important people in the world. It felt AMAZING and it felt especially amazing to me because for the first time, I got to enjoy it with my closet ever chick friends. It never happens! And I liked it, because they deserved it. If i’m being honest, because of the blog…I pretty much get treated this way everywhere. What made that day special was the fact they got to feel special tooooooooooooooo! It made me happy! And Giuseppe!!! What a guy! Yeah he’s flirty and naughty. He’s cheeky and sexy…he’s stylish and powerful….but he went out of his way to make sure we enjoyed our time there! I really appreciated it. He works really hard and explained to me how it’s so difficult to hold a relationship when you are a guy who works so hard. Nonetheless, he made sure we were happy.
I mean, if we needed a wee….he’d was walk us. I walked ‘hand in hand’ with him down to the loo…as he scowled at staff members who weren’t doing their jobs, yet skipped with me in great spirits, so I could….piss. LOL.
If we wanted to tinker outside…he escorted us. Double B and I wanted some ‘fresh air,’ so we kept jiggling outside, in our full blown extensions to watch some race that was going on and being televised.
Giuseppe: ‘SEE! WE EVEN PUT ON A RACE FOR YOU! LOL.’
Double B: ‘Is this the Olympics? They have countries printed on their butts??’
Me: ‘You idiot! They’re not going to make Olympians run past the fucking Wetherspoons, Gino’s and Wagamamas! Lol
Double B: ‘Wonder who she’s running for, as she has ‘HOE’ written on her butt!’
Then we pissed ourselves laughing, felt better than everyone else…and then talked about our sex lives with Giuseppe. He likes a curvy girl! They look better during sex. With a flick of our extensions we were back through the magic doors and to our surprise our table had been filled and beautified with the most delicately, delicious looking platters, fit for Queens of Queens….of all delights and winks with more prosecco being chilled for us by our side. It looked like a feast of absolute glamourosity of fresh breads, grained olive dips, giant meat platters, breadsticks, stylishly wrapped veggie…all sorts….all so creatively presented and all made with that good old Italian Love…It’s the love that makes it special, as it’s all about the ‘sharing’ platter.. That’s what food is about in that place….You do food with your family or you share it with the people that you love. I love that. It was delivered to out table before we even ordered our starters and mains.
‘Shit! we’re meant to be texting!!!’
And just like that as the we swirled in the finest Italian dining, with the finest Italian service, as more prosecco was poured endlessly, our starters and mains were brought out and now fresh cocktails were being handed to us by Italian waiters with smiles…we began to photograph, instagram and picture/ text EVERYTHING! In a world of Social Media these ‘moments’ matter. And when it comes to swanky restaurants, events, cocktails bars or anything of that manner…I AM your girl of choice. These days, if a brand knows what they’re doing….:) …I’m usually their first choice of blogger. Didn’t I do well! 🙂
Me: ‘Is this Hustle Barbie’s Espresso Martini? Fuck it. I’ll just drink it anyway, she in the loo…’
Now, we’re Yorkshire girls, we love a good time, we love to eat, we love great food, BUT WE ENJOY THE FINER THINGS IN LIFE….We’re LEEDS and every single ONE of my friends turned around that day and said,
‘That was the best food I have EVER HAD!’
‘I have never felt so special!’
‘We need to come back again….NOW!’
‘There’s no words to describe how great this has been!’
After wards with our little bellies full and our souls filled with cocktails..
Mel: ‘I feel a bit pissed me…’
..we all had to say our ‘Good byes’ dash off and catch our trains, rides and next choices home.
Everyone left merrily, Hustle Barbie went to meet friends for more drinks, Giuseppe, Firmonnell and I went back downstairs to the Prosecco bar to enjoy more cocktails and talk about life…
Then with a wink….we slowly sauntered back to the station to catch out trains out of the city.
I MISSED BOTH MY TRAINS….and my phone had died. So I had to sit with this guy who had a communal table, where all the weirdos flocked. No chairs. Just a table. He had slept in a van and got up at 4.30am to help people on bikes. He was nurse or something and had just given a homeless women, with no teeth money, who then got arrested for being on drugs 10 seconds afterward. Lol
One second you’re being swirled in VIP magic. The next moment you’re watching women with no life left in their soul, get arrested in seconds by communal tables with no chairs. 😫
(Told you i’d get you in the blog. :))
I totally typed chrissiewunna.com into his notes section.