My Blog, Bartlett & The New Year

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So, we did it! We championed an entire 2016! Some of you have had a shit year! Some of you have had a great year! I guess it depends on how you look at things? But nonetheless, you survived it, lived it, loved and hopefully shimmied a bit closer to your ‘dreams come true.’

I’ve had a massive year of change. If i go back two years ago, 2014 was probably the worst year of my life that I had to prettily surf with a wink and a round of deep breaths. I couldn’t wait for it to be over, as if anything went wrong that year, it did. My work life, my love life, my home life…it all went to pot…and I could’ve taken that time and drowned myself in a rummy pity party (lol,) yet I didn’t, it made me strong, I laughed it off and I sort of ‘rose from the ashes’ as they say, ten times more dynamic.

Then in 2015, after being thrown into and spat out of an emotional rollercoaster, without my consent or being strapped in, I was determined to play it safe and live a more mundane ‘un..glittery’ existence, that wasn’t me. I dated a normal boring boy, with no goals, ambition, no adventure, or life experience. I looked after him…and i got bored quickly. Yet it was great because at the same time as him draining the ‘ooh laa’ out of me, as his insecurity had sort of got in the way of me furthering myself with my career, it helped me quickly realise what i actually wanted, what my purpose was and that I was ready. So i changed my world around, got happy, got rid of boy and again became 10 times more mighty. bI was on the right path, as i had bored myself SO silly, that i yearned for excitement and to make my mark. (Work was always good.)

Everything changed in 2016 and fast, as i was no longer hanging about. I stayed loyal to my goals, what i wanted, who i wanted to be and became productive. Work changed Lifestyle changed. Guys changed. I stayed firmly single all year. Everything was new, fresh and exciting. I had shimmied up that ladder a little bit more and then in October, it all changed again, as i made a little decision to go to The Leeds Lifestyle Awards. From that point on weirdly, the Wunna magic was ignited…and opportunity just seemed to keep domino falling infront of me. Instead of shying away, I took the up….(I still kept making weird boy decisions through the year)…But i finally pulled myself together, turned the focus away from that and CONCENTRATED on what I wanted, needed and what would make me happy. (Work was always good.)

Fresh opportunities came a tapping…and the blog set fire and went WILD. It had been read all over the world on every continent anyway, yet it SHOT OUT OF GLITTER CANON AND IT GOT CRAZY.

Everything changed and I was going from place to place, doing life, blogging about it and turning the ‘Chrissie Wunna’ name, into a brand… by accident. (Even though I kinda knew what i was doing. 😉 ) Within weeks, I was being labelled the ‘Real Life, Carrie Bradshaw,’ an inspiration, a Cyberlebrity, I was getting invited to some of the top new openings, events and places..for the largest companies, brands, be they restaurants, clubs, fashion labels…everything and just because they wanted to appear on this page! I became Verified on Twitter and everyone seemed to be listening to what i was saying. Meetings sort of confetti showered upon me and big agents, infact all sorts came a tapping at my kitten door, in order to try and represent me. (I didn’t go with any of them, as I didn’t feel the ‘fit’ was right. The ‘fit’ matters. Who you work alongside or trust to give your ‘brand’ to, collaborate with, or build an empire with…matters. It’s like dating, you wouldn’t just settle because you have nothing going on, if you don’t have to.)

Important people were tuning into my blog, more and more followers were peeking into Wunna land and people who I’M personally inspired by started to follow me or take a moment of their time to actually click on Chrissiewunna.com and read a blog. (AS IF!) I mean, to ME that was simply such a personal pinnacle. It made my eyes smile, filled my soul with gratitude and made me feel of ‘worth.’

All of this was going on…as I was going to work every single day, doing my day job, being a single Mum, loving all of that and getting on with life, happily. I mean, I work alongside the best people. I also have such a supportive family, that in that area, i cannot at all go wrong.

Towards the end of the year things busied up…and as I was working through the day, being a Mum after work and then working through the evening at events, with the help of my Mum and the Baby Daddies…more stuff changed, I made more connections, people wanted to help me and I began (which is where I am now) stamping my mark down that little harder. I mean GOSH, the absolutely FABULOUS time that I had at Gino D’Acampo’s new restaurant in Leeds, that stepped up my game a little. (I go back in January after the first successful visit. 🙂 I can’t wait!) But yes, I was being asked to just show up at venues and simply BLOG from them. I KNOW!!! WITH BOOZE!!! It’s a crazy kind of wonderful that is so humbling that I almost have to pinch myself to believe it. I’ve shimmied at every Christmas celebrity event. I blogged my version of them all. MY birthday with Lisa Appleton ended up all over the national press (because of Lisa’s Bum Lol,) and I started to get *papped* at places and then I got nominated for the UK Blog Awards…and in a week, i’ll find out if i made the shortlist. (I even made the UK Blog Awards Trend!! AS IF!!)

During this whole entire time, my sanctuary and my grounding force was always my work colleagues, my children and my moments alone of reflection away from the madness. (Like I went back to the office today and ‘The Mighty’ said that my blog reads like i’m a frilly Bimbo type, who’s all ‘wishy washy cocktails,’ when really i’m quite sensible, ambitious and together. It was her last day today at work for a while, as she is off to birth a human. We’ll miss her.)

BUT also towards the end of the year I really got into watching these truly inspiring Vlogs by Steven Bartlett, who created the whole ‘Social Chain’ company. Every night I watched one, (and I still do) to learn, to calm my mind in the evenings as I laid in bed and to feel empowered before I went to sleep.

I actually found his Vlog accidentally via ‘Eton Mess’ who I had stopped talking to, not because of any problems, as we’re still friends, but just because that’s what ‘life’ wanted. Anyway, he’d posted one of Bartlett’s Vlogs on his Facebook Wall, about ‘Negative People,’ and after watching it, I then posted one of his other Vlogs on MY OWN Facebook wall.

From that point on like he was some Life Wizard, I was hooked, because i felt so inspired, I could relate to everything he was saying…PLUS, there was just something about him…there is…isn’t there…There’s just something about that guy…

When I appeared at Gino’s for lunch (best place ever) doing the Restuarant blog with ‘House of Solo’ I used my last 1 percent of battery life, watching a Bartlett Vlog at the Prosecco bar. YES, during my own actual appearance. Lol. The next day when i wrote my blog and posted it everywhere like I do and I tagged Steven Bartlett into my Twitter Post. I didn’t think he’d read it/skim it, or care to be honest. But i tagged him in it anyway…and he read it..He even Tweeted me back thanking me for the mention in the blog and then thanked me for watching and supporting HIS Vlogs. AS IF!!! It literally made me BEAM! I would never have thought that that would’ve happened, but it did and it made me happy because I had emailed Social Chain a week and a half before and I hadn’t recieved a response.

So, I guess i’m saying that this year has been AMAZING and i hope yours has too! If it hasn’t, look forward or create better times. For me, it’s been the year where in which I rebooted, refound my passion, became productive and did what I loved. It’s been the year where appropriate or magical changes have been made in order to place all the right elements in their correct places for the next step. I don’t know whether I’VE done that or ‘The Gods’ have thrown me a bone. Lol.

What I did want to say was THANK YOU, as even though this is the diary of MY life, if it wasn’t for YOU, tuning in… when you can.. or when you care and returning back to ‘Wunna Land’ afterward, it really wouldn’t be where it’s at today.

I mean GOD, when it first started a decade ago in Hollywood and only 8 people read it a month….I didn’t have internet access (and the blog was still on Myspace) so I had to walk to The Beverly Center, in West Hollywood every day and write my blog from one of the display demo desktops at the Apple Mac store. Lol. They didn’t even stop me. I must’ve looked like a weirdo. I even did it at the Apple Stores in New York and in every hotel that provided free internet services…all over America. Lol. (People didn’t want me to blog from their venue then. 🙂 Ten years on…they’re begging me too.)

I remember being excited because 74 people had read my blog in ONE DAY. 🙂 Now, like I always tell you, tens and TENS OF THOUSANDS OF YOU *click* into Wunna Land, all over the world…On every single continent….In over 200 different countries…..and its translated into 40 different languages a day. (Haha…You know the spiel.)

But thank YOU for reading and following my life. It’s just my version of it and I hope yours is going just as well or at least the way you wish it to!

Thank you to everyone who has been a real life part of this year. I always say that my blog is like a written word, reality show, where real people, *pop* out of nowhere and become part of it all, as their real life path crosses with mine. If it was a written word, reality show, then I will honestly tell you that I HAVE NEVER EVER HAD A BETTER CAST, THAN THE CAST OF THIS YEAR!! Lol. THANK YOU. You rocked! (Even the ones that put me through shit. Lol.)

I don’t know what my 2017 has in store…I’ve read loads of tweets by others who all have ‘so many great things happening in 2017.’ 

I honestly have no clue what’s a coming? I just know that whatever life throws at me…I’m ready for it and i’m armed with a *wink.*

Hopefully i’ll BOSS IT and not drink too much gin.

I’ll leave you with this… (This was the first Steven Bartlett Vlog that I found posted on someone else’s Facebook wall…)

Happy 2017. Sail Well!

SENDING YOU ALL MY LOVE.

FUCKING HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Next ‘IT’ Girl & Inspiration

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Well I have certainly noticed that every little girl in a little bit of limelight, or a huge amount of stardust is wanting to be the next UK Girl of ‘IT.’ (And when i say, ‘every little girl,’ i’m referring to those in entertainment, who have maybe shone their bit of ‘look at me,’ been on the telly, wanting their moment of stardom, have been around for ages, or the ones that have just experienced their first five minutes and now want to roll it into a future.)

Of recent, I’ve been invited to blog a lot of events, do lunches, shimmie at celebrity parties etc..where i’ve charmingly chittered to huge amount of glittery people, hung out with a dandy bunch of ‘heels’ and watched everything or nothing taking place, right before my very eyes, be it in public, behind the scenes or in Cyberland. (I watched everything closely. I adore the psychology behind it all. I love studying people and seeing what makes them tick, what their next move is…like a creepy but glamourous stalker Lol…..and like i’m some kind of dodgy Mystic Meg, I predict stuff accurately with a *wiggle,* a *giggle* and a bloody good *wink.*

2017 is the year that everyone shoots for a ‘COMEBACK!’

I’ve heard this phrase been thrown about a lot at events…

‘I want to be the next Kim Kardashian.’

Or

‘ We ARE the answer to the Kardashians.’

And it’s sort of making me smirk a little and I shouldn’t, because gosh, i’ve felt all that before. I get it. But i guess, the problem here is, that there already is a Kim Kardashian and you can’t BE HER EVER. You can only BE YOU. (Hard to hear, I know. But it’s true.) And to top it all off, there is also three more Kardashians and two Jenner’s, who have quite solidly and rather excellently formed some kind of ‘IT’ girl, power house that has taken over the world. It’s amazing. Who WOULDN’T want to be them! Well done! *Applause all round.*

BUT like i said, THEY ARE The Kardashians and you can’t be them. Nor can you be the UK’s answer to them. They ARE ‘THEM.’ And they’ll glitter piss all over you, if you attempt to wangle on their block.

However, i’m not trying to be negative here, as if anything i’m a positive person, a warm hearted being, i’m ambitious, fun loving and someone who enjoys to inspire and be inspired. I’m not one of those ‘tooly’ narky people, who just moan at everything. They’re dicks. But i’m honest and loyal to my honesty. So what i’m trying to say, is that THE ONE AND ONLY THING THAT YOU CAN DO OR BE BETTER THAN ANYONE ELSE….IS YOU!

Not another single other being on this entire planet can be you, better than you, so do it well. Don’t focus on what other’s are doing or what they’re being, or how they’re looking or what they’re saying. By all means, be inspired by them. Study them. That’s what they’re there for. All great new ideas have usually been formed off the back of someone else’s great idea. Yet remember to concentrate on what YOU’RE doing, what’s great about YOU, as a brand or a person remember what YOU stand for. What YOU celebrate! And when you do that, and you stay focused, you work hard, you be creative with it, and give it your all, your time, your heart, your dedication, but you do it well, you do it smartly. You proactively move towards your goal and you use your flipping brain. If you do all that, I think you’ll find that people may begin to notice…and when they do…YOU SMASH IT!!

Focus on what you do well…and do it!

So yes, Kim K has done really well and that means it CAN BE DONE, so you CAN be the next UK girl of ‘IT.’ You don’t have to BE her, LOOK like her, DO like her…You just be you, as there’s room for everyone, to ‘BOSS IT.’ Some are going to be better than other’s at it. In 2017 EVERYONE’S ATTEMPTING A COMEBACK. (Including myself. But more than anything, career wise…i’m a blogger, a writer..that has turned into this mini sized ‘personality,’ after being on the telly for a bit, being a model for a bit and  designing a sex toy range for Ann Summers…a bit. But i did it all well. I like to think that i made ‘impact’ because you an do a lot of things and have no one notice. Lol)

But back to his ‘IT’ girl malarky, like i said, when Kim wanted to be the next Girl of ‘IT’ she was watching the likes of Hilton, who had the world eating out of her hand. She knew her personally and had done for years, even went to school with her and she was nothing like Paris, yet had the same ambition.

Obviously I know Paris well, I am a product of her UK TV show, I spent a lot of time with her, when she was at her PEAK and that was during filming and after the show had ended. ( I have a lot to be thankful for, to the producers and casting at ITv2 for putting me on that show. It put wind under my sails and i am a massive Hilton fan, as i’ve never watched a girl work harder.)  But yes, both of those chicks, utterly different, yet both absolute ‘BOSSES’ of ambition.

So with the right ingredients, determination and the correct people on your side…you can do it too. (Something tells me that Hilton is about to sly on in and snatch back her crown from Kim K. Lol I can see it.)

Anyway, away from that….today I was utterly inspired. Right, I drive. But i have this driver, this taxi guy who I always use when i need to go to an event, i need a last minute glammy run or just a driver that I can trust. Today, I called upon him to ride ‘Baby Junior and I’ to Toys R Us in Doncaster. (Important Event.) I don’t know why i called him for a lift, but I did and it seems as though whenever i need a pep talk, because all yesterday I was getting stressed, ‘The Gods’ up above send me ‘Rob The Driver.’ He’s like a weird Guardian Angel.

I get in, we start talking, I ask him about his world, we have a giggle, Junior asks for the tunes cranked up and Rob then shoots in and asks me about my world. We talk life, love, work and dating. Now, Rob’s seen through the years, driven the car with different male faces in the back, over the years, rode me to events, piked me up from them and heard all the gossip and well…he’s in good stead to deliver advice, without me asking, into Wunna land.

And to cut a long story short…after he had told me that I needed to date someone as ‘busy and ambitious’ as I was, who had similar goals, as no one else would do, as they would either be suffocating, not part of my ‘team,’ or just not get it.

‘Not to be funny Chrissie. But if i wasn’t to know you and was to see you in a bar, i wouldn’t DARE come up to you and ask you out. You don’t see it, but i do. You have a way of making a guy feel less masculine without you even knowing. That’s why you need to date someone who is ballsy, confident, doing well, has his own life going down and is on a similar path. Someone that you can look up too and think WOW! However that will just come.’

Like I said, i’m never too stressed out by my love life. It’ll all work out in the end. He’ll find me. He’ll pursue me. He’ll win me, f that’s the way it goes. Sorted. Fairytale box *ticked.* I mean Cinderella lost her goddamn shoe at an event ‘cos she was PISSED, not late for the carriage. It was Prince Charming who did all the leg work and found her, to make him hers. 🙂

But MORE IMPORTANTLY…

Rob ‘The Driver’ said this one thing, before Baby Junior and I left his car to wipe Toy R Us out, whilst everything was on sale…and that was this…

‘I have always said no one I know works as hard as you Chrissie and you’ve just got this aura about you. You were built for this. No matter where you are, people know YOU’RE THERE!! Whether you win, whether you lose…People know you are there and that’s something that can’t be bought! So look, you’re OVER HALFWAY to the finish line now….This year, you just need to go for it.’

And with a smile, a nod and this whole warm feeling of absolute inspiration that rose all the way through my soul, to make me beam, I waved him ‘goodbye,’ grabbed by little son (Junior has my exact face and it freaks me out completely) and as I swung Rob’s door shut, I knew great things were coming…

 

 

 

 

Boxing Day, Boys & Them Good Old Goals

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God! Get me back to work. Lol. I’m certainly going mental. I’m like a firecracker ready to *burst.* My mind is going at 100 miles an hour, and i feel like i’m not being put to use, as such. I’m sort of just ‘sitting pretty,’ with all this creative juice a bubbling and a determination that’s sprinkled with winks, will and charm. I’m even back to laying in bed awake, in the dark, after my usual and favourite Bartlett Vlog session and I need to either stop being an idiot and chill or just get on with it. I’m ready to BOSS IT now. Lol.

I think after all the December excitement that i went through, I really smashed it and I felt really proud of myself, as everything in the last year, I became strong. I was confident in what i was doing. I still am.  Even more so now. No that’s wrong. I usually have no clue what i’m doing, but when i do it, I really GO FOR IT.  Lol. But I will say that every single goal I set for myself and even gave myself a timeline for…I ACHIEVED. Even when everyone thought it was impossible. Even when i thought it might be impossible. Lol. 😉 I fucking did it and i loved it, because it reminded me of ‘Old Skool Chrissie Wunna’ days in LA when i was a demon at nailing goals. But Hollywood is such a motivating town, as everyone’s out for the same thing. It makes you stronger, keeps you smart, sparks your passion and wires in your competitive streak. AND you will always look good doing everything. 😉 If i’m going for it, i’m going for it. If i’m fucking it off, i’m fucking it off. SO, i might need to try and examine the ‘grey’ a bit more in 2017. I hate the ‘grey’ of anything. I’m an impulsive person. I’m a decisive person. To me, the ‘grey’ is always like a long boring lecture of ‘someone else’s problems.’

I will also say that once i had quit ‘for no real reason’ dating (that’s when you date someone who isn’t really right for you, but you find yourself accidentally sailing through some weird life chapter with them. You know they’re wrong because your connection doesn’t make your eyes smile, your soul light up, your fire burn. It simply ‘lulls’ calmly onward, like it has slowly slaved away it’s entire boring life and has finally had a cuppa tea and retired with back ache. It’s someone who doesn’t kinda mentally or emotionally fit the life that you are living, or wanting to live, someone who doesn’t have their own goals or support your dreams either. I have dreams. I’m wanting to glitter build an empire. I can’t do that with ‘Mr. Billy No Goals,’ who just wants to bone me after pizza. I like to feel impressed by men. So even though i’ve been single for a year and i’m enjoying it. I’m very open to love. I love, love. Yet, he ofcourse, just has to be the right guy and i’ll know it when I have it because i’ll feel it and he will to. *Cue: Electricity.* I’m never worried about my love life, because i know that he will find me. One day he’ll be flicking through is own life and he’ll pass me, see me, read something about me or quickly glance at a selfie on Facebook and in that moment…BOOM…he’ll have some kind of *sense* that brings him to me. The ace thing about being an ambitious girl is the simple fact that it takes your mind off your love life, so you’re never that moany ‘eat loads of carbs…cry into tequila…..drunk dial continuously’ girl. Lol. I’ve been her, as a young kitten in LA…AND Yorkshire in fact. Haha. I’ve been her GLOBALLY. 🙂 It’s funny now. But fucking hell at the time it was heart breaking.

Christmas is over, the New Year celebrations are ahead of us. I’m filled with a  bunch of Boxing day leftovers. I only did cocktails. 🙂 But I spent much needed love and time with my family. I come from a really close family and along with Ruby and Junior, we’re The Wunna’s and it’s great. I don’t think the babies have been happier. They’ve never just had me to themselves for whole days on the trot. My full attention. It makes me smile.

I rested up also, as I needed to. But then with a quick Boxing Day text, I went out with my old work friends Jenna and Danielle. Oh my GOD, so much fun! I LOVE that i have such great company always. I have some really great friends, who are really great humans. They are definitely girls who know my whole life. We know so much about one another, but we’re so honest about everything. Lol.

Jenna and I are all grown and sensible now. Danielle is still fun and NOT. (She totally kept disappearing to *Christmas Kiss* unsavory boys down ginnels, in sneaky corners or in Tesco’s carparks. Lol.) Makes me WEE MYSELF because i love her.

*Oh! We’ve drank all the vodka Chrissie.*

Hahahaha!

Jenna’s ace because she’s like Wunna Security. If people are staring at me…she will know. If anyone is about to bother me…she will know and she will sort it. I trust her immensely. And she’s ace because she really good at giving people *daggers* if i need her to. AND really good at just being ‘us’ if we’re being stared at.

Danielle… (who kept talking about wiping down cheesy willies..)

‘Honestly, Chrissie! I wish you could see into my brain and understand what i’ve been through. I have to wipe down cheesy willies.’

‘You don’t need to go to Uni for that! Just grab a fucking wet wipe and wipe it for Gods Sake.’

Anyway, Danielle. (I used to call her ‘Greedy Dan’) was like Paparazzi Dan. Jesus Christ! Lol. I love a picture, a video, a snapchat, a Tweet, a selfie. You can take one any time. You can plonk it on *Insta.* I’m game, i’m there with you. I’m all about being Cyber Social and well…it’s my main domain, isn’t it!

Danielle, decides to snapchat absolutely every single waking moment of our evening (which was fun) but to the point that she filmed a VIDEO of me going to the CASH MACHINE, which ended with me turning around with a hair toss and saying,

‘Have you just filmed my PIN NUMBER DICKHEAD! LOL. Stop!’

Hahaha, she was just filming me putting in my pin, grabbing dosh out…Lol. Hilarious.

Great night! We went into town after drinks around Ackworth. Jenna and I went home early, with dirty kebabs in our hands. When Jenna ordered her Kebab, she eloquently said,

‘Dirty kebab please?’ Lol. Oh and this was after some random guy kept offering to give us £10 for ONE cigarette.

‘I’ll give you a tenner!’

Danielle stayed out. Lol. *Pisses myself laughing.* Lord knows what that girl got up to! Definitely the most sober person in town. NAAAAAAAAAT!

We sang out loud to this all evening….


Great impromptu night!

The rest of the days have been spent with my Babies… 🙂

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Christmas is done. (I need to start my fricking DIET. I’ve gone up a dress size! And only five ft’ four. I can’t hold ‘*chub* well.

New Year is great. I love a celebration, as I tend to refrain from celebrating the past year, as i more concentrate on bursting into the new year with hope and my fingers crossed, with emergency rum in the cupboard.

I have lots planned for 2017. I just kinda hope it goes well. I’m positive. I’m feeling strong. I’m feeling like i can *boss it.* But i do worry…Lol.

It’s on my mind….

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Miss Swimwear UK Parties & Reality Boys Nights

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Hope you’ve had the most AMAZING Christmas! I spoilt my kids rotten and I don’t even care because they deserve more than anything. I do the single mum thing well and I never want them to ever feel that they’ve gone without anything physically, emotionally, mentally or financially. I’ve worked my arse off ALL year, and i’m starting to empire build, so if i can’t spend it my little pieces of love, even if they’re stroppy, then who can I spend it on!

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With Christmas, it makes no difference if you’ve spent it with family, got pissed with friends, had a quiet one to yourself after a truly busy work year, or simply spent it, in a way that you wish you never had. It’s done now and it was a simple chapter to your story. My news feed is filled with people who are either devastated that George Michael and Carrie Fisher have died or people who are stating that we’re currently floating in limbo, that time where it’s no longer Christmas, yet it’s not the New Year either. In my mind, we’re still LIVING, we’re still loving and we shouldn’t ‘book end’ phases of life, should we, cos it’s stupid? We’re not in limbo…we’re doing TODAY! So do it well! I mean, GOD I deliberately didn’t ‘wind down’ during the weeks before Christmas, as I wanted to *smash* into the New year, with my Louboutins kicking in ‘Karate Champion’ mode. I wanted to get ahead. So whilst most ‘shimmered down,’ I bubbled up and went for it and because of that I HAVE HAD THE BEST YEAR EVER so far and have set myself up (hopefully lol) for a decent 2017.

However, let’s take a peek back, as even though i’ve spent a whole lot of time with my family and the babies over Christmas, I seem to have been on this GIANT GLITTERY, if not almost GLAMOUROUS BENDER that feels as though it has lasted weeks. 🙂 I’ve been happy. I’ve been knackered. I’ve had far too much to drink and i’ve even puked. (Which is always disgusting, even with a hair toss and..tits. Lol)

But yes, let me take you back to around five days ago, (I hate a back track blog, as i love the moment when it’s still ‘live’.)  I decided to go shimmie at the ‘Official Miss Swimsuit UK Xmas Party’ at Oracle Leeds. It was last minute decision to go, so I spoke to Verena who was the Queen of the event. The chick who was putting it all together and running the entire show, single handedly. (You know how much I LOVE ladies who can ‘Boss it.’) She’s been throwing Miss Swimsuit UK castings a over the nation, in order to finally find the Ultimate Winner, it was near, it sounded fun and this celeb event was to simply kick back and celebrate the success of the year. Sounded great to me! So ‘House of Solo’ and I went to check the event out. (‘House of Solo’ is currently the luckiest bastard known to mankind, as he gets to be my Plus 1 to literally everything and is cheeky enough to tell me to take him. Lol. But it helps us both out, as he’s running his Fashion Magazine and I’ve got the blog to ‘Victory Sign’ so like i said previously, it’s great having a buddy who’s into business and dashed in ambition. ‘I’d never know any of this was going on if it wasn’t for you,’ said the Fashion Mag owner to the Burmese Glamour Puss. Then he topped it off with a ‘God, you look TIRED,‘ as I stepped into the car! Lol. Fucks sake! Haha! He’s ace.)

Anyway, we’re both from the same town, so we know Oracle like the back of our hands. We got there early, before it all started, as it’s a better time to get to see things, hear things and chat to people. I SCAN EVERYTHING. Even when you think i’m not. I’m so good at it now that my mind is almost trained to photograph and remember everything that’s relevant.

As soon as we walk in, ULTIMATE GLITTERATTI GLAMOUR is what oozed out of the walls and swirled through the air, in a stylish, yet almost seductive fashion, that felt dazzled in fresh innocence. It was all bright white furnitured, soaked in purple mood lighting with large glamourous mirrors everywhere. It felt good to be there and as I walked through the door I saw a lady, gorgeous body, beautiful vixen, thin, pouting in a tiny silver dress, with a bright white faux fur shoulder drape, heels and a giant *Queen* crown on her head, posing camera shots. (There were lights and cameras EVERYWHERE.)

In fact, slowly, everywhere we looked beautiful boobied, glamourous sexy ladies, kept randomly appearing out of nowhere! Some were sat by champagne buckets. Some lip glossing in the giant mirrors. Some arriving to shoot in bikinis…All types. All ages. All tremendously attractive! I took a bunch of selfies and tweeted them out as fast as I could, then as ‘House of Solo’ was wallowing in a blissful glee of booby heaven (lol,) I  shot a text over to Verena reading,

‘Hi, I’m here! Are you about?’

Immediately, the most glamourous lady strutted up to me, the one that had been posing in the crown, all smiles, all northern, all filled with excitement and with this almost magnetic look, she said,

‘I’m ‘ere Chrissie.’ 

Now, we’ve actually known of each other for years. We’ve messaged before. never met in person, but i’ve always been watching all the things she’s been up to. She takes a lot on, she’s a hustler and if anything she to is mega ambitious. The way i’d put it, is that she’s one of those ‘knows everybody and works really hard’ kinda chicks. She wants to make her mark and IS doing. She’s bubbly, she’s glamourous, but you do not fuck with Vereena. Lol. She looks like she’s not to be messed with. AND I LIKE THAT!

We chatted. We hugged, She gave me the run down of events. The ‘what i can do’s‘ and the ‘what i can’t’s.’  Y’see, I’m respectful, so i’ll honour the *cant’s*…MOST OF THE TIME :). Haha. In fact, no…. to be honest, I usually do whatever the balls, I want. 🙂 It’s my blog and well i’ll get what i need. 🙂 YET, i had this respect for Vereena after chatting to her and meeting her and I witnessed the ‘want to do well’ in her. It caught my eye and it was that that made me respect her massively. So I did what I was told and wasn’t naughty at all. (And that so good for me.)

Fabulous start! ‘House o Solo’ was off doing his own thing, making his own connections for his magazine. I was selfie taking, watching everything, Tweeting out and doing my own media board shots or the camera. I was getting more and more excited for the evening, as there was just this good vibe of energy darting about the bar. Everyone as happy. The girls had now arrived and we’re posing for Pap pictures in their matching swimsuits. The bar had now opened (the event had not yet begun,) but the cutest Bunny Girls were tottering around with giggles and heels serving drinks. It was turning into a magical swirl of fun. It was very alive, young and very current. It was also cool, because Helen Holt, the DJ for Menagerie was playing that night and I got to do my arrival shots with her. Remember that I was fresh off the Menagerie floor, after my birthday antics with the delightful Lisa Appleton. (Her bum and her heroic carrying of me got into the pages of The Sun, The Daily Mail. The Daily mirror, Celeb News, Celebs Now and all sorts of other things. Lol. I’m still not over it yet! That was a fun night.)

Anyway a photographer was snapping pictures, drinks are being poured, the most glamorous Miss Swimsuit UK girls were walking around in..well..swimsuits and cameras were flashing, videos were being taken, I was Tweeting away and everything was circulating fast. It was all exciting and filled with winks and fun…

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THEN MY FAVOURITE HAPPENED!

THE BOYS ARRIVED. 🙂

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Now, i’m flirty by nature and ‘one of the boys’ at the same time as being a girly girl. I know, makes no sense, but it’s so weirdly true. I love being a girl and i adore a bit of eye candy. Yet, I can kick it with the boys no problem and banter it out with the finest! I definitely felt like a Cougar though. Lol.

So, this is all before the event had officially begun, so we’re still behind the scenes and as ‘House of Solo’ and I are stood by the giant mirror Tweeting, in walks Ellis Lacy. Now, I already knew who was coming to this event etc…and I already knew everything about Ellis, as a few days before the event he had followed me on Twitter and I had followed him back. He casually walks in, all sexy, tall and warm…there was a ‘warmth’ about Ellis…his soul was good. I watched him on Xfactor and ofcourse I had watched his naughty Vlog. Lol. (I’m a Cougar in training, it’s what we do.)

Anyway first thing he does, he looks to his right, sees me and immediately says ‘Hi.’ And i like that, as more often than not, unless i’m at a place to meet a being specifically, they tend not to dare speak to me during the moment? It’s odd, as by nature, i’m pretty friendly. Lol. I’m Northern, it’s in my blood. I’m a show girl. It’s in my manner. 😉 SPEAK TO ME. Lol.

Anyway, the boys were now arriving because they were doing a shoot to go out to the press the following day, with the Swimsuit Girls.

The ever so handsome and muscle bound ‘Love Island’ hero, that we know as Tom Powell arrived. Freshly single, fun, huge, so well mannered. He looks like a, ‘get the job’ done kinda guy. He listens. He works hard.

Then the ‘cheeky ‘Ex on the beach’ star Chet Johnson follows in, again lots of fun, lots of confidence, not afraid to banter and give it some welly. He’s had a good year. He’s also a good sport. Those boys have some Bromance going on, as they’ve been hanging out lots with each other and smashing the party scene.

Honestly, they’re all not just great guys, who are obviously doing well, as they begin their careers with a bang, yet they’re all so individually attractive that when you’re surrounded by a Lacy, Powell, Johnson wall of huddle, you would really not know which one to fancy?? Glamour Puss Problems! 😉 I got to chat to them all and have a giggle, so it completely made my loins..I mean my night worth it. 🙂

Anyway, ‘House of Solo’ and I are now downing Gin and Tonics, as we’re working, I’m doing press shots and watching the guys an girls all get their own ‘shoot’ on.

House of Solo; ‘ Yo, I’ve shot this video of you.’

Me: ‘Aww, thanks. It’s actually awesome.’

House of Solo; ‘ That’ll be a tenner.’

Me: ‘Fuck off. 🙂  Good video though.’

Everyone gets changed. The boys head off back to their hotel to get changed for a night of party. I check in with Vereena, who’s now sort of nervous because she wants the evening to be a success. To me…it hadn’t even BEGUN and it was already a success. Plus, i know that some believe, that you need that moment of worry, in order to fully feel a sense of achievement when you WIN! I get that. Yet I’m so schooled at surprises in life now, that something can mean a great deal to me, however I have this tremendous ability to never be SO emotionally attached to it that it makes my focus ‘fuzzy.’ I’m terribly ambitious. Terribly playful. Yet the most emotionally ‘together’ person you will ever meet. There’s not *wishy washy* about me. I’m ready regardless. I’m ready if it goes well and i’m ready if it goes badly.

But the event was about to start and I ventured outside after looking down at my phone and seeing a DM from the BEST Pap photographer in all of the land, Stephen Farrell. He’s literally shot everyone throughout every stage of their career. His work gets into the papers constantly, always, as every moment of every day passes. He’s pictured ‘The Greats’ of all genres and what I love about Stephen is that he’s so down to earth and easy to get on with. i can chat to him all night about anything..and I pretty much did. He’s so dedicated and will stand out in the FREEZING COLD, all night to get that ONE SHOT that he needs. He knows who everyone is and what they do and the great thing about him is that he never judges anyone, as to where they are on the level of the ‘fame game.’ You never know who is about to ‘blow up’ next. Right now, it literally could be anyone.

Anyway, I was chatting to Stephen, as he was the pap that had shot Lisa and I on my birthday night out in Manchester. He himself was just so much fun. So it’s good for him to know everyone he can. It’s good for me to see everything from every person’s angle of the ‘circus.’ (I mean, I was there with the Celebs, I was there with Vereena the event runner, I was there with Swimsuit girls who want to make a name for themselves, I was there with the pap outside, I was there with ‘House of Solo’ whilst he was finding content for his fashion magazine and I was there as ME. I like to see things from everyone’s perspective.

I took ‘Steve the Pap’ a Red Bull. I smuggled it outside in my purse. Lol. Poor thing. It was freezing and it must’ve been knackering for him. He had just travelled up from shooting James Arthur in Manchester.

Slowly everyone began to arrive and upstairs Oracle had already started filling up with sexy party goers. Honestly, the sexiest party goers in all the land. It was filled with ‘Handsomes,’ Swimwear models, Bunny girls, Stylish men, Booby chicks , sparkler lit champagne bottles and the BEST HIP HOP JAMS EVER!!! (I had a bit of a dance and a wiggle with ‘House of Solo’ before I tottered out to see Steve. We like a ‘jam.’)

So, now the celebs are arriving. Love Island Winner Jessica strolls up with Sam Reece. I don’t know if they’re dating right now? But they could be? They might just be hanging out. They had a friend ‘Ben’ with them, who stopped me immediately for hugs and air kisses and he later snapchatted me to Cassidy for kicks, whilst being African for ‘House of Solo.’ Lol. Jess worked the pap camera, with hot, selective ‘moody’ faces…and she got into the press the next morning, just like that. Sam, was as quiet as can be and almost avoided the camera. He walked around it and eventually stopped for one pic with Pete by the entrance.

‘Ex on the beach’ Jem Lucy arrived. Porn star Sophie Dalzell arrived. *PAP/PAP/PAP/PAP/PAP/PAP*

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Then ‘The Boys’ arrived, back from the hotel, ready to party and it was ace, because as I was doing my own Pap shots, they had crept up behind me, so I got to *crash* boys nights too! HEAVEN! I couldn’t have found a better *squad.*

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After banter with Steve and talks about Chloe Khan, I ventured back upstairs to the party to get on it with ‘House of Solo.’ Work was now done and we went with ‘Fuck it, let’s party.’ I had got the picture. If ITV2 and MTV had a baby…it would’ve produced this party. Lol. We drank, we danced, we lived! It was a glittery swirl of fun and laughter, littered with faces from your favourite reality shows. It almost makes it surreal.

Verena had OBVIOUSLY done an amazing job, as I stopped and selfied with her a few times, as she *beamed.* I mean, the event was SO BUSY and popular that she couldn’t have thrown a better gig. It as certainly a ‘tick box’ on her list of achievements.

I got home at around 2.30am (not so bad) and must have just passed out in bed, naked, after i kicked off my Hilton heels, slipped out of the sequinned dress and gracefully laid my way into Dream land. It was my last glittery event finish to a really great year. Like i said, i’ve worked really hard and been through so many changes this year! I have a GREAT 2017 lined up…and I believe we have a Wunna Comeback in store! 😉

I enjoyed Christmas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Cake With My Face On!

ac70So, I was feeling a little tender, gently eased the door closed and dashed (went slowly) to Greggs for coffee as requested by ‘The Mighty!’ I just figured I must have looked as rough as I felt and with one deep look, she was certain the coffee needed to run through my glittery ‘hungover’ system!

Stood in the queue. It seemed to take forever, like the end of a conga line that wasn’t any fun anymore. I finally got my little tinsel tits to the front of the Greggs queue and *POP,* almost with an enthusiasm that would suggest a confetti shower was about to take place, I was greeted with the most excited, the most loving and lively show of,

‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!! The birthday fairies have bought you your coffee this morning!!!’

‘What!!?? Who?’ I suddenly woke up!! It’s like a rush of excitement had burst into my bubble of *rough.*

‘Honestly! They’ve bought your coffee for you!’

I was so happy, I literally screeched out loud, jumped up and down so much that I broke a fucking nail, grabbed my coffee, after stirring in 42 sugars and dashed (but this time went fast) back to the office!

You see, with me it’s the small touches, that make my heart melt. I mean, how thoughtful! It literally radiated my sorry ass, kitten soul with this buzz of utter love!

I burst through the door with the bounce of fun and gratefulness with,

‘Oh my GOD! Thank you! Thank you’S!’

And from that point onward, the day…even though I was hollering life and work on TWO HOURS sleep (but at least I got there, at least I worked it all) was THE BEST Birthday work day I could’ve ever had and simply because I surrounded by the most thoughtful humans in all of the land. I couldn’t ever wish to work with better souls, who literally went out of the way just to keep my birthday going and to show me that they cared…and they didn’t have to! I pretty much spend 350 of my 365 days with these girls, so even though we’re a team of hard working ‘business’ chicks, there is so much love between us, that is decorated with banter, laughter and sass! It’s great!

I mean the coffee to me was lovely enough, as I felt like I needed to be ‘babied,’ but we all also went on a big lunch together to celebrate birthday times and our hard work over the year. Got back and I saw ‘Hot Sarah’ and ‘The Mighty’ fiddling around my desk. We don’t like people fiddling with our desks! Lol.

They spotted me from the glass window on the door and I’m now pulling an angry ‘what are you doing at my desk’ face…But then I looked harder and I could see Flowers! FLOWERS! Yes! The most beautiful giant bouquet of orange and yellow blooms with a giant ‘Happy Birthday’ balloon suspended in the air from  them! Awwww!

I actually could not believe my eyes!!!!

My face changed from ‘scowl’ to a happy, opened mouthed, still in the window, *shocked* face, as I darted through the door, screaming with a mad excitement and towards my desk!!!

And that wasn’t all!

GET to my desk and it is COVERED in giant purple, ‘BIRTHDAY PRINCESS’ banners, literally ALL over, like a celebratory madness of fun! My huge flowers are at my desk! There’s a massive ‘Birthday Girl’ badge for me to wear, the most glamourous, shiny gold bottle of Prosecco stood at computer, a  3 pack of Desperados, which if you didn’t know is one of my favourite ‘chill out’ drinks lol, a card that had been signed by every single one of them and to top it ALL OFF, AN ACTUAL BIRTHDAY CAKE, with Mini Wunna’s on it! Yes! A cake with my face on!!! It had my fucking FACE ON IT! As if they went to that much trouble!!! It was just so perfect! It was just so ME and ALL my favourite girly things in one!!! I literally couldn’t contain myself! There was screeches and this constant smiley face that beamed from my little kitty soul! 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁

I will never ever forget how thoughtful they all were. It made my entire year because you can go out and party and do all the fancy shindigs, but nothing is better than those real life moments, where you’re surrounded by just GREAT people, awesome humans, who you love, respect, who know you better than anyone and who you work alongside, every day, to achieve some kind of great future together!!!

The cake was lit with candles and huge glamourous fountain sparklers were bursting from either side and as I looked around me, as they all laughed and sang ‘Happy Birtgday’ at me, I felt like the single most happiest girl in the entire world.

(Thank you so much!!)

I couldn’t possibly explain to you how wonderful I felt, as the energy of it all was just overwhelming.

But how lucky am I to have turned 36 with such joy! My friends, my family, the fun! Even all the messages and posts you all left me on my profiles! I’ll  flashback to it one day and do a little happy cry! As everyone has made turning 36 so Wunnaful!!!

Here are two pics of My office treats!! It completely made my birthday week an absolute gem!!  image image

I slept well that night!!!

Roll on the new year! Happy being 36 to meeee!!!

However, no rest for the wicked as BOOM tonight I’m at The Official Ms. Swimwear UK Xmas Party, to blog all about it. It’s a celeb packed event. I can’t wait to tell you all about it and we’ll I don’t have to titter very far, as the big flashy ‘doo daa’ is happening at Oracle Bar, Leeds!

Right in my doorstep!!

See you there! (I’ll be Tweeting and Facebooking as soon as I get there this evening! ‘ )

Life has completely changed for me and I’m in the UP! I’m actually starting to feel like the real life Carrie Bradshaw now! Lol. Yet, we all know I’m a little more ‘Samantha!’ 😉

Thank you so much for everything!!!

Something tells me I’m going to have a really great 2017! I can feel it in my glittery bones!! 🙌🏽

 

 

 

 

My Birthday Shimmie To Manchester

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Woke up on December 20th at 6.08am, completely naked, on top of the sheets, half my face on and my GIANT, glammy hair piece still ON MY HEAD in full glory, like it was some kinda of BIRTHDAY crown. I was in Room 825 (really nice room) of the Macdonald Manchester Hotel and Spa. I had just turned THIRTY SIX the day before and I chose to do it with good friends Big Brother Star Lisa Appleton and Celebrity Blogger, Ryan Mira, in Manchester. I had a train to catch, that would get me back to Leeds, well Pontefract at 6.57am. I had work at 8.45am and had to get there on time. I did it! But Lord knows how???  Infact, i will ALWAYS MAKE WORK, no matter how! My tummy felt like i hadn’t eaten in ages, so i did a mini (and somewhat glamourous puke) on the hotel bed (so sorry)…and then just like that, got up, got ready, got to Piccadilly train station and got on my flipping train….COMPLETELY ON TIME! In my mind, if you’re gonna *juggle* things, than you better *juggle* them well, without letting anyone down and most importantly … yourself. I smashed it! *Wiggle…Wink.*

But let’s rewind to the day before…

I had spent the entire day with my babies Ruby and Junior, doing lunch with my family…My Mum, Dad &Brother at Ego, In Ackworth. We had so much fun, that time flew and before you know it, I was rushing home to pack a bag, in a panic and getting dashed off and dropped at Barnsely train station (as it was the only station to get me to Manchester on time) in literally moments.

Boom! On a train. The 17.00 to Manchester, a bit flustered, excited for my birthday evening, ready to check into the hotel and then rush into a taxi, to go meet Lisa and Ryan at Menagerie for my birthday.

Once I hit Manchester, I had about 20 minutes to get ready and be at the joint. (I was there early. 😉  The trainee hotel ‘check in’ girl laughed as I dashed past her with a ‘She’s just checked in, in jeans and a jumper and in about a minute, she’s ready and shooting out the door dressed like Pussycat Doll.’

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I’ll fast forward, so i don’t bore you.

But i got to Menagerie, Lisa and Ryan arrived 10 minutes after me. I had called them to see how far they were, then..

*Pap/Pap/Pap/Pap/Pap/* …

…as photographers basically took our picture, as we tottered into the new place. It was quiet because it was Monday. But it was my birthday and all three of us are of a drunky, fun, nature, so we didn’t even care! Within seconds we had the most delicious Pornstar Martini’s in our hands and we’re chatting away about, life, career, love, what we hoped and where we hoped, in the most glamourous location every. We even had a Kardashian conversation, which led to Ryan teaching me what a dirty ‘Jimmy Choo’ was. Lol.

‘I’m gonna call it that ALL the time now!’ Lol.

‘But she did Chrissie. She *Jimmy Chooed* him ans leaked it everywhere!’

Menagerie is utterly creative, decadent, modern, with an almost sexy twist of burlesque. It’s very current. But there’s lots going on…like champagne poured from chandeliers, dancers dangling and spinning in hoops above your table, cocktails that you share in giant swans for £100 or single drinks with fake £20 notes, burning from them. It’s very clever. Everything is presented well. Everything’s very bouji and unique. Everything in that place is ‘rich,’…and it costs.

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Anyway, we a needed air, we needed a moment. We’d laughed, gossiped, they gave me a bath bomb (that i’ve lost!! I think i left it in a bar on Canal Street??) Ryan’s shot outside already and Lisa and I are stood at the entrance Menagerie.

Couldn’t open the door for shit! It was LOCKED. Like it really was. We couldn’t move it, we were stuck and we’re sort of just looking around, trapped in this little entrance way, puzzled and laughing. Then Lisa decides to ‘hit’ a button on the side, next to the door. Y’know how some places have a ‘Press to Exit’ button, to make the door slowly ease open.

SHE HITS THE FUCKING FIRE ALARM. Hahahaha!

It’s my birthday, we’re still trapped in the entrance way, an alarm is now going off, we’re pissing ourselves laughing, the manager on duty looked all fed up with us, so we stopped laughing, so he didn’t get more annoyed. He began opening up a large doorway box and pressing all the buttons in all the land, to stop the alarm…and then this host girl walks up to the door… and just opens it. Lol. SO we weren’t even stuck. 🙂 Oops!

We were glad to get outside though, especially after Pornstar Martini’s  and were determined to enjoy my birthday night, as we swung around trees, piggy backed each other, kissed giant Polar Bears, seductively chatted up bollards and measured boobie sizes. Ryan got really into it also…As Lisa and I literally danced around a car park, HE found a ‘Santa Stop Here’ sign, started pretend hitting Lisa with it, but then dashed behind her and unzipped the back of her PVC skirt…. (In that moment, out of nowhere *Pap/Pap/Pap/Pap/*)

Anyway, we decide to go back inside for food and more cocktails. Ryan’s now flirting with an Australian Waiter, with a Doctor Boyfriend, we’re telling everyone to come out with us and following them on Twitter (you always do that when you’re pissed don’t you. Lol.) I hadn’t eaten all evening, so i was feeling MERRY, looking great, sprinkled in ‘SEXY’ and then Lisa and I started talking about love, our lives, how we’re both single, good friends and then our careers. (I always say that I have it easy, as my life is an open book, you just have to Google it, open up a blog and read on…What you read is what I am…It’s my life…and you get a good grasp of who I am from it. There’s less guessing.)

And you know, away from what people THINK they may know of Lisa, if you were to know her and meet her in the flesh, she’s literally beautiful, the funniest, most genuine, down to earth, chick you’ll ever meet. But she’s ambitious and hard working. Yes, she’s an entertainer…as am I. Yet she’s been through her fair share of hard times…and you know what, after speaking to her so closely sat down with cocktails, in the middle of mood lighting and Menagerie…She deserves her moment. We gossiped about everything frankly. All the secrets in all the land.  She wants to do well…and is.

Then I had to tell her off with an..

‘EWW NO! YOU CAN’T FANCY HAIRY MEN! I HATE THAT! IT’S GROSS!’ (This was after the waiter was referred to as ‘Pretty.’)

Now, i don’t mind a GQ gent. A pretty one. Or one that has his own creative take on style. I love it. My favourite type of guy, is a guy with a great mind, intelligent, funny, fun, thoughtful, sexy and ambitious. I don’t focus on looks a much as people may think. I love eye candy, don’t get me wrong, but i’m mostly mentally and emotionally stimulated. But ofcourse, I love to feel attracted to a guy. YET Lisa loves a ‘mans, mans.’ A big rugged, muscle bound hero. Hairy even!!! Lol. I DON’T LIKE HAIRY. And i know you can’t help it. But i can’t help being a tool also, so there. 🙂

So we’re pissing ourselves laughing with Ryan, as we’re sat in a GIANT GLAMOUROUS BIRDCAGE, that has feathers entwined in it and pretend birds flying out of it, opposite a wall that has a giant electronic ‘Selfie Magic Mirror’ and a pink neon sign that says something like ‘Trade your wings in for mine.’ We’re eating olives and sipping ‘Pornstars’ and Lisa and I are actually having a conversation about porn and how it’s ruined some peoples sex lives.

Now i’m vocal in the bedroom, i’m a senusual person and well i’m not screamy, but a ‘show man’ Lol. However, Lisa says we (as in girls) get the best orgasms when we’re quiet and stay really still… and she’s right. I mean porn has made boys and men think that girls ‘get off’ by doing slutty ‘ooh’ faces at them and voicing champion ‘screeches.’ Lol. We don’t. 🙂

Wait, I’m getting distracted. 😉

We’re in Menagerie, the mood lighting is all pink, purple and dark, with bright white furniture in our booth and we’re now pissed and celebrating my birthday.

Ryan’s now thinking about Canal street, after flirting with the hot waiter. Lisa’s determined to get on with my birthday celebrations and i’m ‘Pornstar Martini’ delighted. Don’t get me wrong, things were beautiful in Menagerie, but when you’re sat in one place for ages, and you’re ‘firecrackers’ like the three of us are…it can kinda make a place feel ‘flat.’ So i simply turned my little kitten head to them, whilst sat in a bloody feathered birdcage (lol) and said,

‘Let’s fuck it off and go to canal street.’  (I am the Queen)

There was glint in our eye, laughter and we left.

As we left…and we’re NOW DRUNKIES.

*Pap/Pap/Pap/Pap/Pap/Pap/Pap*

Yet, we’re loving it now, playing up to it, picking each other up, posing, pouting, swearing, dancing. We didn’t even care! We were on birthday mode, doing Manchester, boobies under the stars and GOING FOR IT! If i’m turning thirty six, i’m lucky to be well, alive and still be able to love life!

It was like we almost *blinked* and BOOM, we were on the cobbles of Canal street…and this is when the fun happened!

Straight away, dancing under lights, posing and selfie taking with red sequinned, drag queens,bumping into other Big Brother stars, letting a Drag queen, dressed in a Sexy Santa Suit, be a DIVA  at us because she didn’t have time for our shit. Lol.

We’ve gone for it now and ended up at some bar called Churchills, because they offered us free wine (lol) and before you know it, they’re calling us on stage to sing karaoke and I feel like i sort of just blinked with my boobies and i’m stood on a stage with Lisa, as Ryan is filming it, with a microphone in my hand, SINGING ‘Wannabe’ by the fucking Spice girls, for an audience. LOL.

Honestly, we were shite. But oh my God, we gave it some welly. They loved us. Everyone was videoing and camera phoning the moment. We even got called ‘Iconic.’ HAHAHAHA. But let me tell you, being a Spice Girl is EXHAUSTING. How the HELL Mel B got through that rap section sober, I don’t know? (I was totally Mel B. 🙂 )

We get off the stage. We’re wanting wine, everyone else is wanting selfies. We’re loving it though, as we now have birthday fever. Girls and guys kept calling me ‘beautiful’ and ‘a Queen’ and when you’re dead old, you kinda adore it, don’t you. 🙂 Hahaha! It makes you feel good.

Then a group of straight boys come in. It’s now quite late and Ryan and Lisa have to head home to get the last train. I DECIDE TO STAY OUT. So, i’m now on my own, with the masses, in this bar on Canal Street, guzzling buckets of wine, with a ton of people now asking for selfies and the ‘straight ‘ boys head straight over and begin to DANCE OFF, HIT ON ME, in order to win my ‘only girl straight girl in the bar’ affection. It got so crazy that the manager had to keep pulling me out the way, or pulling them off me.

I then started having a conversation with a girl, as one guy is trying to flirt with me, by sexy dancing to Nelly and lifting up his top …and out of nowhere this other guy, darted in and started butting the ‘Nelly Dancing Guy’ out of the way to make HIS move. He was literally standing right infront of my face and giving me the ‘come ons.’ The manager (who was in a cowboy hat Lol…pulled me away again.)

I’m pissed by now, so i’m just tottering around smiling and selfie taking with those who adore Wunna land! (I followed you on Twitter Mickey Daniels! 🙂 )

Then it all just went mental!

The straight boys are now really drunk and now forcing themselves into Wunna land. A girl starts chatting to me and tells one of the boys, who’s asking me out that..

‘We’re together. She’s with me.’ 

He dances off somewhere and she turns around and says,

‘You’re too good for him.’ 

He dances his way back and then JESUS CHRIST, OUT OF NOWHERE, some other straight guy, that wasn’t even playing ‘Love Wunna,’ comes up behind him and fricking HITS HIM IN THE FACE and SMASHES A FUCKING BOTTLE OVER HIS HEAD.

Screaming happens, everything’s gone mental. He’s dragged him outside to beat him up. The girl that was ‘saving’ me from men, turns around and smashes my wine bottle on the BAR SIDE to go out and join the fight.

I’m out the way at this point, as i’ve been pushed to one side and sheltered.

THE POLICE CAME and Churchills (the bar) gets shut down for the rest of the evening,

What the absolute fuck!! WHAT JUST HAPPENED???

The cowboy dressed manager, (who was also once on Big Brother) walks up to me, makes sure i’m alright and says,

‘God! Lol! What a storm. We shouldn’t have let them in really, but we did. We’ve had to close now, as the police are here and let me tell you, THAT HAS NEVER HAPPENED, IN THE HISTORY OF ME WORKING HERE.’

Then she walked me out, to another bar. Just so i’d get there safely. Lol. Yet after a drink, I left and got in a taxi. It was just too strange and a guy in a Pokeman shirt was dancing around me. He as with his Ozzie best friend, who kept telling me that she had a boyfriend, but wouldn’t say no to trying out a relationship with a girl.  Lol. They were actually lovely. So i really shouldn’t make fun of them. But i was tired now and i’d stopped having fun now, so i lied and said i needed the loo…and left them.

Got to my hotel…wiped half my face off, stripped off totally starkers, put my phone on charge, set it for five o clock in the morning, (It was 3 o clock in the morning,) and CRASHED in what felt like the comfiest bed known to mankind, in Room 825 at the Macdonald Manchester Hotel.

Missed my alarm. Shocked myself up, after feeling sick at 6.08am. 

That’s how i sailed into Tuesday. I fell asleep on my train and again just at the right time, *shocked* myself up, at the exact right station, just as people were getting off at Leeds. Missed my connection though, so I ended up in a taxi to the office.

Made it to work, bang on time, in Pontefract. Had no clue what time it was really? But ran up to the office door, with all my stay over bags, over my shoulders. I swung open the door a jar and ‘The Mighty’ looked me right in the eyes, smirked (like she had ‘been there’ herself) and in a stern, commanding, yet friendly manner, she simply says…

‘GO TO GREGGS NOW AND GET YOURSELF A COFFEE…..’

 

Lisa Appleton flashes her bum as the zip breaks on her skin tight PVC skirt

 

 

 

 

 

My Glitzy Trip To Gino’s

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‘I’m here! I’m parked in the same place as before.’

‘Cool…i’m walking down now.’

Got to his car and *swung* open the door, in my tiny thigh out, peeky boobed, dark gold wrap dress, draped in my GIANT ‘Little Mistress’ faux fur of absolute divinity and as I stepped my pretty kitty heels into the vehicle, the vehicle that would journey us to Gino D’Acampo’s new restaurant in Leeds,  I belly laughed out loud with an..

‘It totally looks like you’ve just picked up a hooker at noon! Hahaha.’ 

And there we were on our way to Gino’s.

When i say ‘We,’ I mean my good friend ‘Abeiku Arthur’ and I, who owns the delightful High Fashion magazine ‘House of Solo.’ It’s filled with articles and photos from London fashion week, top designers, exclusive five star brands, his shoots with supermodels in Milan,  the pics from the recent Victoria Secret show…all sorts. We’re good friends, we met at the Leeds Lifestyle Awards, we also just so happen to live in the exact same town and both of us have businesses/brands that are up and coming and ready to make impact.

He’s a hustler. We both are! And it’s so great to have a like minded business buddy, who just gets it and rolls with the punches, whilst cross questioning me to find out new ways of promotion, as right now i’m doing pretty well and getting invited to a great deal, yet at the same time beginning to get recognition for it. I’m having a good year. He himself, has just shot Tom Zanetti for the front cover of his Fashion Magazine. I think the shoot was Monday?

In the car he was telling me that Tom was FOUR HOURS LATE to the shoot because he had been out with Geordie Shore, ‘Scotty T’ all night, who is currently doing Panto in Leeds and his PR/Manager only told ‘House of Solo’ after the second late hour had passed. 🙂 When Zanetti showed up, he thought he was shooting for Metro. Lol. (HAHAHAH, totally makes me piss my glamourous frillies! I love that happened to him AND that he has to go through so much stress all the time. On the plus, once Tom did show up, he was lovely and chatty and apparently a great model.)

‘Yeah but was he a chav?’

‘Nooo. Not at all. You need to get to know him.’

We got to Gino D’Acampo’s ‘My Restuarant’ in Leeds and boy did we arrive!

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I’d been Tweeting about going all week, all day and I couldn’t be more excited! I love a bit of Gino D’Acampo, I adore the fact that we guys and dolls of Leeds can now delight in traditional family Italian food, dashed in glamour. Plus, ofcourse, you KNOW that you will find me at any place that boasts one of the most stylish Prosecco bars, with a side of cheeky ‘Hanky Panky’ cocktails, the freshest most delicious bar snacks (i’m a grazer) and ones that were cleverly served on tiny wooden boards, a cut of newspaper and with Italian charm!

From the moment I strutted in, there was a lively but relaxing, down to earth family, yet GQ style of  excitement swirling around the baby blue, clear glass entranced, two floored restaurant. This place has ONLY JUST OPENED, so it’s fresh onto the scene…and GOSH…I had so much fun yesterday, that i could’ve literally stayed there and guzzled chilled buckets of prosecco at the bar, ALL the way through to the early hours of the morning.

I mean, as soon as we tottered in, the service was impeccable and we were immediately given a card, which was a Restaurant bar tab, before being shown downstairs to the Member’s Prosecco bar to grab a fresh pour of ‘bubbles,’ before we sat down to lunch! (My prosecco glass was EVEN CHILLED and cosied over with a cold mist of ‘you’re here now, in luxury.’)

This place is by far, THE BEST PLACE IN LEEDS, to come for food, or even just drinks, be you on a date, a business meeting, with ‘The Girls,’ or ‘The Boys’ and even with the entire family. It literally caters for everyone, in a stylish, modern, ‘you want to be here and be seen’ way. Yet it’s sponged over with a glamourous version of Italian tradition.

Gino’s face is stamped on EVERYTHING! He is on the walls in black and white frames, pictured with every celeb known to mankind. His sexy little Italian face is EVEN on your table Olive Oil. The marketing (and I come from a marketing background) is phenomenal and i adore great marketing!

At 1pm we sat down to eat! I ordered the Cabonara. Which is my favourite Italian dish of all time and ‘The Big A’ (that’s what i’m deciding to call ‘House of Solo’ Abeiku Arthur now, as i can’t be arsed to type his name out every second, Lol) ordered the Spinach, Egg and Cheese Pizza.

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More prosecco was poured, a ceramic dish of walnuts with a silver nutcracker was served with it. Our meal came out at the EXACT RIGHT amount of time….Not too fast or not too slow. The exact right time, almost like they KNEW when we wished to eat.

I mean all the way through that time, both ‘The Big A’ and I were Tweeting, Selfie Taking, Facebooking, Instagraming…doing the whole ENTIRE works. There was so much excitement going on and we wanted you to see it all and experience our version of it, as we did it. There was a lot to take in, as i wanted you to ‘feel’ the place. It funny because normal, sane humans, would look at our table and find it totally bonkers. Yet to us, it was really normal. We’re both business minded, we both run little brands that we hope,  will one day be huge successes… and we BOTH understand that about each other and our friendship. I went for it. I was selfie taking and posting away. ‘The Big A’ was smashing his Social Media also, yet EVEN HE paused and said,

‘What have i got left? Oh yeah, I need to Instagram it.’ LOL

It’s fun because we turned our trip there into a Cyberland Circus of excitement, we had hundreds of people following our every move at Gino’s in Leeds. I tweeted and selfied away and the masses ‘Liked’ and Retweeted’ their favourite bits of our day. the restuarants notifications must have been crazy, as my own personal accounts were going nuts. They were shimming. (And that’s thanks to you! 🙂 ) Kinda made me feel proud. Kinda made me feel POWERFUL. Haha!

Anyway, we gobbled up our lunch and OH MY GOD, the food there is literally TO DIE FOR! You ALL need to go. My pasta was probably THE BEST PASTA, that I have had in years and I HAVE BEEN EVERYWHERE! But let me tell you, UNLIKE EVERYWHERE Gino’s Restaurant ISN’T *break the bank* PRICEY at all. It’s completely affordable for everyone. A dish for £9. I mean, gosh, where can you get food THAT GOOD, for that price these days, with that service?

Infact, I know places that are charging so much more for food that is FAR LESS delicious! Plus, Gino’s has those ‘little touches’ that make a big difference. I love the ‘little touches.’ As upstairs they sell Gino’s Cookbooks. Good sales tool. Yet great idea, as whatever you eat at the restaurant that day, whatever you’ve chosen from the menu, you can then buy the book on your way out and try and make it yourself at home! It’s sexy, it’s romantic, it’s fun! 😉 This restaurant will turn your ‘No Carbs before Marbs’ diet out of the fucking window and simply because the pasta is SO goddamn good!

Okay away from all that. We’d had a few drinks by now and as you know i love a tipple… or four hundred. Woohoo! I embrace a world of Prosecco dazzled fun, style and good company and you should to. Live a little! Enjoy it. Get lost in the magic. Swirl with it. Pour some more.

I mean, all ‘The Big A’ kept saying was,

‘She’s totally getting on it.’ Lol.

And i didn’t care! I’m a fun girl and well it’s MY BIRTHDAY WEEKEND!!! Cut a sister some slack! If i’m gonna drink 200 Prosecco’s….i’m going to go for it with *can can* kicks. So There!

Plus, we’d Tweeted everything, pictured everything, posted everything, so we finally kicked back and I ordered in some cocktails for dessert. I love getting cocktails for dessert instead of pudding. It makes me smile. Keeps my heart warm.

I swung in with the most delightfully, full bodied, espresso martini (it had a sassy KICK) and House of Solo ‘Big A’ ordered the fruity tooty, mint leaved ‘Pineapple Express.’ Lol.

Oh! They were delicious and all that social media work, kinda took it out of us. It can get tiring. Lol. I mean, if you didn’t know anything that day, you knew that I was at Gino’s, in Leeds, with House of Solo Magazine.’

We then both realized (after cocktails) that I was happily trapped in the most stylishy comfy, baby blue room WITH THE SINGLE MOST ATTRACTIVE ITALIAN MEN. How did i not realize this! It was like some kind of shirted Handsome Italian Man… Heaven. Almost every single waiter and bartender (aside from a couple girls and maybe two Leeds Yorkshire boys) was a hot blooded, dark haired, tall, sexy, with the accent and everything, Italian MAN. LORD HAVE MERCY on my little SINGLE SOUL!

LADIES YOU NEED TO GET YOURSELVES DOWN THERE. It oozes sex appeal… EVERYWHERE. Your mouth with ‘Mmm’ with pasta, but your loins will burn with desire.

‘House of Solo’ (I’ve changed his name again) even looked around and with an approving ‘They know what they’re doing’ nod and grin, he agreed it’s literally a paradise for groups of ladies! You notice the sexy Italians straight away, yet you kinda only begin to appreciate them, in a slutty way… after an Espresso Martini. 🙂

The hair ‘kittened out’ a little, the boobs peeked through the dress and the the wrap, unwrapped itself to a ‘little freer.’ not because of the hot blooded Italians everywhere, 🙂  but simply because by now we felt so much at home at Gino’s, that we kinda didn’t want to leave…

So we didn’t.

We ordered in another round of cocktails and went back to the Prosecco bar, to free up some table space (as it was getting busier and busier as the day went on) and we chatted about life, work, business and people.

As the day progressed, more and more stylish beings started sauntering in. All very high fashion. All smart as can be. ‘The Big A’ had his eyes on each of them. (One of the ‘Stylish New Entrants’ came up to me and rubbed my faux fur, whilst looking me right in the eye with a ‘Is it chincilla?’ No…It’s ‘Little Mistress.’ Lol.)

More drinks were being ordered, more drinks we being poured. The bartenders were going around with divine tasting nibblets, on trendy wooden blocks. It was a great idea, as it encouraged those who didn’t book in to eat, to maybe consider dining the next time they visited. (Clever! Clever!)

We were laughing. We were joking. I was happily moaning because i always think that being a chick in business, especially a boobied, ‘bouji’ one…makes it difficult at times. As often Ill have to approach guys to work alongside me and well sometimes people don’t take you seriously, so you have to prove yourself EVEN MORE SO than others. OR they just fancy  you and they can’t get passed that bit, before they even listen to the fact that your brain might work also. 🙂

I’m an ambitious, smart, charming, yet feisty little shit and i intend to do well. I’m doing well. My history is pretty decent. So ‘House of Solo’ and I were pissing ourselves at my ramblings and then all of a sudden out of nowhere he notices a female bartender, Googles ‘Alexa Chung’ and immediately whispers at me with a..

‘That girl, the bartender. I need to shoot her. She looks just like Alexa Chung on the British Vogue Editorial, when she did that high fashion nude shoot. I need to tell her. I need to shoot her.’

‘Yeah, well go ahead. Sip that, get her details and ask if she’d want to do a shoot. Explain that you own a fashion magazine though.’

‘No i can’t why? It makes me sound…’

‘OH MY ABSOLUTE GOD! Don’t be SO STUPID. You cannot go up to a girl, tell her she looks like a stylish nude Vogue model and ask for her number, to do a shoot with you, you idiot! You have to tell her that you own the fucking magazine.’ 

But in he goes, with his charm and his Google Screenshot of Alexa Chung. LOL. (Why do guys not listen!!??!!)

‘Hey! *Beckons her over the bar* You look like this girl. She’s a model for Vogue. Do you know her?

‘No.’ (Hahaha…Sorry, i find that really funny.)

I think you could be a model. I’d like your number…’

Then I couldn’t bare the ‘so many mishaps‘ in his approach, so i butted in with a..

‘He owns a High Fashion magazine, It’s called House of Solo. He thinks you’d be a great model and he’d like to shoot you for the magazine.’ 

She beams an innocent smile of glee. Her eyes lit up. She had a sexy foreign accent. A warm one, not a harsh one. He continues the rest of the chat with the bartender and she writes down her number, so that they can schedule in a shoot date for the Spring Edition of his magazine! I know! Crazy stuff!

See! You never know who you’re going to meet!

Then he turns around and whilst laughing tells me off for butting in on his ‘approach!’ Hahaha!

‘You need to learn from the best.’

‘You need to learn from a girl who gets men coming up to her all the time, saying stuff like that! What? I was only helping. I got all PR on the situation and started taking over the convo for you, to make sure it went well. And it did! What? I can’t help it! It’s in my blood!’

The Yorkshire Bartender looked at me, after he realised his colleague has just got scouted. So I smiled and said,

‘Don’t worry. You can be in my blog. It’s much better than his shitty magazine.’ Hahaha!

We laughed it all off and ordered more drinks in. At this point, I looked down at my phone and I had a DM from a guy that I recently followed on Twitter, as I had come across his profile and The Noir Agency the other day. Just basic, ‘Hey’s! How are you’s!’

I love learning within my industry and I love learning about all these creative agencies that seem to be crossing my life path. I’d actually like to work alongside one. So i’ve been looking around and having a peeky. I saw this guys profile…and i followed him. He’s also quite handsome, so why not! I was telling ‘House of Solo about it all, as  he started sipping shandy at the bar.

Anyway, In case you didn’t know, every night i’ve got into watching these Vlogs  by Steven Barlett. I’ve been reading up about the whole Social Chain thing and i’ve been inspired, as i’m a creative soul and I enjoy their work, his work…all things of this nature. And i’m doing pretty well right now, aren’t I!

SO, in the middle of the absolute glamourous bustle now occurring at Gino’s ‘My Restaurant.’ A bustle that we all created together…I decide to go onto Twitter, at the Prosecco bar, with my drink and my boobs out dress and WATCH Steven Barlett’s latest Vlog. It flicks on. I can see him and his video being played. But i can’t ofcourse hear any of it, as the ambiance in Gino’s Bar is now filled with a  loud, yet comforting buzz of creative, fruitful, social, excitement. It was beautiful. I love the feel of that noise. It’s satisfying.

However, LET ME TELL YOU, the clever thing about his Vlog is that it absolutely ran subtitles. So i was able to sit in the middle of this beautiful Prosecco bar bustle and completely absorb the whole entire thing! I got to glamourously razzle my liver AND absorb knowledge.

I even used up my LAST ONE PERCENT OF BATTERY LIFE on watching Steven Barlett’s Vlog. I would NEVER give up my last one percent of battery life. And i know you’re never going to read this…But if you do…that’s how special you were in that moment. Lol. Phone died after that! (FUCKER.)

Then like the magic had happened…’House of Solo’ got all into this whole Noir Agency/Social Chain/Steven Barlett Vlog thing. (Copy cat.) He knew that he had lost my attention to something. He’s also a creative human. He knew that i had found something great that i was interested in and that’s shit when you’re drinking with someone isn’t it. Hahaha! I have no manners. But GREAT manners all at the same time. 🙂

He got hooked and started following everyone. I even told him that i had emailed The Social Chain last week and no one replied. He laughed and told me that they didn’t care about me. Lol.

‘Eww! DON’T KICK A GIRL WHEN SHE’S DOWN DUDE! HAHAH!’

(We’re still nestled at Gino’s Prosecco Bar at this point…and everyone is now staring at us.)

Then we started making these weird bets. So as I was Tweeting the fact that I was watching Barlett’s Vlog. ‘House of Solo’ decides to Tweet him for a meeting? What!!!! I guess, all’s fair in business and Prosecco. Hahaha!

So I predicted that Barlett would ‘like’ my comment (and he did)…as who wouldn’t, i’m inspired by the Vlogs and i usually watch them in bed for utter mind comfort. (That sounds creepy. Hahaha!) Anyway that day, I was watching it from Gino D’Acampo’s dazzling new venue, surrounded by baby blue, glass and joyous sophisticated bustle. Day had turned to night and we had accidentally been there for hours, without realizing. That’s when you know you’re having a good time and you’re in a place of wonder, that does not constrain you, or limit you to a schedule.

Anyway, I then told cocky ‘House of Solo’ that if he actually got a reply from Barlett…(thinking that he wouldn’t…and he didn’t) i’d kick him in the balls! Haha. I didn’t get to ‘knacker ball’ him.

Life was good! My pre birthday brunch was a marvel. I couldn’t have chosen a better place to just lunch, live and enjoy!

At the end of our time, we were given two magical gold coins…(Sounds like a fairytale.) With these coins and as you leave the restaurant, you are to go dip into a tiny, glamourous photo booth, which is equipped with a green screen and everything…and as a souvenir of your time spent at Gino’s, you can take the most fun photobooth selfies, with various hilarious backdrops to treasure forever!

Amazing right!

Here are mine!

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The most delicious new place for you to enjoy and I mean that sincerely, as we didn’t even want to leave! For crying out loud and you’ll only get this is you are from Pontefract….’House Of Solo’ loved his time so much that the words, ‘We should go to Biggies’ flew out of his mouth! HAHAHAHAAA.

We didn’t go to ‘Biggies.’ Instead we got dropped off to continue alternate life paths. Lord knows what he did? But i went home to cuddle up to my little Ruby and Junior. (I’ll be taking both of them to Gino’s in the New Year.)

You know, it’s one of the only places where you can feel both stylish, yet so comfortably at home all at the same time. And i mean ‘kick off you kitten heels & have a laugh’ at home.

A truly great find and what a wonderful way spend part of my giant birthday weekend! 🙂 I’m so glad that i’ve officially smeared my Wunna glitz on that place!

Wunna *hearts* Gino D’Acampo’s ‘My Restaurant’ Leeds!

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Husbands, Prosecco & London Business Men

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My birthday weekend has begun! Now, it’s not actually my birthday until Monday Dec 19th and i’ll turn thirty six. Yet since i’m off work and since life is pretty goddamn great, i might as well start early and embrace turning another year older with bells on my tinkers and tinkers of my…tits?

I’m currently blogging from The Prosecco Pit Stop in Doncaster. It’s a glamourous nibble and quick glass of ‘bubbles’ joint. It’s not only a ‘pop up’ in the Frenchgate Center, but it’s also one of my favoruite ‘pop ups’ going. I am here always. I mean, everyone adores a pit stop that serves a bit of bubbly, when you’re kitten heels are tired from shopping. This place is on of my absolute faves, so i couldn’t think of a more relaxing place. (Even though it is smack bang in the middle of lots of people traffic, open aired and where everyone can see me. 😉 )

I had a super Christmassy day at work yesterday. I’ve loved this year and although we’ve had our ups and downs, there’s been a bond. I mean, we’ve worked hard and any time you can sit in a work place and reflect over the year with laughter, wish you had wine and see how far you’ve grown, you know that you’re not only an amazing team, but you are also closer than you thought.

I got narked off, in a happy Christmassy manner, because everyone around me seemed to be headed for BIG CHANGES! ‘Double B’ (who cracks me up madly, she’s like a bubble of bimbo dipped in a giddy sasserilla. There’s no common sense running through her glitter bones, yet she is the most loving and hilarious human you will ever meet.) Anyway, ‘Double B’ is moving into her new posh house, with her boyfriend of 2 years. (She also wants to buy one of our colleagues HAM for Christmas because she remembers how much loves it. Lol. See! Her heart is in the right place. Yet, her sense of thought is absolutely and hilariously warped. Lol.) 

‘The Mighty’ is having an ENTIRE HUMAN. The human is living in her womb as we speak and is certainly not paying rent. That’s big things! But i’m excited for her, as being a Mum for the second time is always and i shouldn’t really say this…MORE rewarding, when you’ve been a working mum. I don’t know why? It just is!

‘My blog sends her to sleep’ Blondie, is headed for retirement. She’s one of those who can never retire because she has such a passion for what she does. (And goes to sleep after reading my blog. Lol.) But she has a giant long rest coming, a ‘holiday’ of retirement!

It kinda left ‘Hot Sarah’ and Myself just looking at one another all puzzled, with an orange material desk divider separating ourselves from one another.

‘THIS IS SHIT. YOU ALL HAVE STUFF TO BE EXCITED ABOUT IN THE NEW YEAR AND WE HAVE NOTHING!’

(I obviously find it hard to express myself. Lol.)

And everything that they had all began with ‘H.’

House, Human…Holiday.

So they decided amongst themselves that I would find a ‘HUSBAND’ AND ‘Hot Sarah’ would have ‘Heaps of Money.’

How come she got ‘Heaps of MONEY’ and i got ‘Husband.’ Lol. That’s fucked up! Hahaha.

I’ve lost hope when it comes to finding a husband. I don’t expect to and i’m happy…and i have all this new career stuff going on that i’m finding this ‘love thang’ hard. But i’m open to it. I just need to find the correct ‘fit.’ (That sounds rude. 🙂 )

The Retiring blond told me that what i might believe a husband IS…ISN’T and although i never listen, I always listen to those who are older and wiser. So i’ll agree. Yet, i think different humans, go through different circumstances and in the end, wish for different things. I would like a partner that i build an empire with, as i’m an ambitious and creative girl.They need to be also. I think i’d enjoy it more if they were similar to that motif. Lol. I don’t expect to find a ‘best friend’ like she did in her lovely husband who she met when she was 17. She’s now sixty something. I KNOW! AMAZING! 

I won’t have that. I’ll not find that. But i’ll find love in a different way. That’s the great thing about love…it’s always different, not always pure, but always an adventure for me. I’d like to find the man of my dreams, a best friend, my Mr.Right. I’m just a difficult human to date. But i have boobs. 🙂 (Please form a queue.)

I have lots going on over the next few days, filled with birthday, family, friends, cocktails, nights and lunches out. I’m all over. I’m doing Doncaster, Pontefract, Leeds and Manchester. I’m celebrating my world and my ‘another year older’ like a champion and I can’t wait!

I’m at Gino D’Acampo’s new restuarant tomorrow afternoon for lunch! I have all sorts going on from that point, so it’s a good time to come and be part of chrissiewunna.com, as i’ll be drunk for most of it….Meaning that i’ll be all chatty and loving and you’ll end up on this blog. So come cross life paths. Be a part of my world. The written word reality show of drama.

Right now, i’m off to Cosmo’s with Ruby for lunch and I’ve just recieved a Whatsapp message from ‘London Business Man’ wishing me a Happy Birthday and reading,

‘Kinda miss you…just saying. xxx’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don’t Be A Dick & Life Choices

 

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I’ve had a couple of gin and tonics so were gonna have to watch it and you’re gonna have to bare with me. 🙂 I’ve put ‘blog writing’ off all evening, as i’ve been playing with Rubes and just neglecting the art of expression via written word long after she had decided to get some kip.

In my mind it’s Christmas time now and yes we all have a ton of work. I’ve been at work all day. But come on now, let’s have a bit of fun, or decent old chilled time, where we can kick off our kitten heels and just pour ourselves an after work tipple to relax and celebrate the year!

I have a birthday in FIVE DAYS, so i have all the excuses in the world to ‘tick box’ a sack load of fun. I mean, God, life is about filling ya cup, as you can’t pour from an empty one! So let’s enjoy it, whilst we still can. (I’ve just read this scary quote that states that if we as humans slept or 8 hours per day and we live to be sixty….we will have slept for 20 years of our lives. It apparently gives us a reason to get up the first time our alarm goes off in the morning? I don’t count in any of this, as being a single mum, with full time work, if i EVER slept for 8 hours on ANY DAY, it would be a blessing.)

I’ve had a decent time today as i’ve worked hard and enjoyed banter. Apparently my blog is so good that it SENDS PEOPLE TO SLEEP! Lol.

‘Chrissie, I love reading your blog and hate it when you don’t write one, as i read it before i go to bed and it sends me to sleep!’

Hahaha! I love it! Be it comforting or boring. Or be you sixteen or sixty….I adore that you have clicked into a bit of Wunna land, before you’ve gone to ‘n’nights.’ Makes me smile! My mum also reads my blog every night before she goes to bed and then screams at me the next morning if i’ve been a dick. 🙂 It’s all about how you’ve raised your kids. 😉 LOL.)

My friend ‘The Mighty’ is about to give birth in the coming months and is preferring to surround herself with fun ‘drink too much’ friends, rather than nice stalkery ones, who we don’t know are actual normal humans or Guardian Angels? I believe in Guardian Angel pop ups. So i’m going with that. Plus, it makes more story more magical than just saying ‘stalker.’

For some reason it made me flash back to a time when a gay guy, stopped me in a club, (I think it was Pre Bar in London) and wanted to name his cat ‘Chrissie Wunna,’ in my honour. Instead he went with ‘Jackonory’..and told me this on the dance floor, as Kylie played in the background. (I had just come off the telly, trying to be best friends with Paris Hilton, at the time.) I mean, JACK…A…FUCKING …NORY! When does that ever *trump* naming your kitten ‘Chrissie Wunna.’ (That was the night Mark Byron, who’s now a Big Brother Telly Presenting Star, asked me to hide his rent money cash in my knickers so he didn’t spend it all on booze. Lol. At that time he used to give out flyers to make people venture into clubs. Now…he’s ‘Off the telly’ Mark and currently doing Panto in Liverpool, dressed as a Genie.)

Today’s ‘Bone to pick’ is this. I had some blogger chick, slag off my ‘Nominated for a UK Blog Award’ moment because it’s apparently ‘not a popularity contest and should be purely based on content.’ (She’s nominated also.)

HANG ON A SECOND MISSY! LET’S JUST TAKE THAT ‘PRINCESS’ IN YOU AND PIPE IT DOWN A NOTCH.

Firstly, you should concentrate on your own bit of cyberland and not chirp off at mine. This space ain’t rented it’s bought and it’s blooming right now, so enjoy it doll face and pour yourself a cocktail.

Secondly…BEFORE I WAS ANYTHING…I was a blogger. I wrote a blog daily in LA for years and have done for the last 10 years. EVERY DAY and when not a single soul read it! I wrote a diary for years before that, before my life story ever became ‘live.’ I wrote and documented my on goings, before ‘having a blog’ and being social media savvy was popular and that was before i became a model…a party queen Lol….before i accidentally moved back to the UK and got on the TV with Paris Hilton…before I had a book out….before i created a range for Ann Summers on the telly….before, before…before it all.

Now, i’m not stupid…All that did make my blog more popular. Yet if anything, i’ve always simply documented my life, the good bits, with the bad. You’ve heard my heart break, you’ve seen me victory dance,  you’ve listened to my make ups, breakups, watched births, my life journey, raw pain and laughter. I’ve told the story of it all. Like God, that moment when my husband left me and he did it by moving all his stuff out of the home when i was out. I came home with my 2 year old daughter and a newborn…and he was gone…All i got was a text. I told that story..and that had nothing to do with a world of limelight or a popularity contest. That was life.

Yet there have been times when i’ve partied with Leonardo Di Caprio and gone out on dates Matt Dillion and been shut in a house with Paris Hilton for a month straight as ITV2 filmed every waking moment of fun for public entertainment.

Just the same as the story above it…It was all still part of my life.

So i’m not  reality star turned blogger. I’m a writer. And i might have been ace enough to make the UK Blog Awards ‘Trend’ on Twitter. But i can’t help being that awesome. 🙂 AND that DOESN’T MEAN THE CONTENT ON MY BLOG IS SHITE.

I’ve said it once and i’ll say it again…BILLIONS OF PEOPLE are doing life, right now as we speak…I’ve simply chosen to document my version of it…Everyone’s life is important. We’re all in it together. Just these little soul dots, chilling on a giant Earth ball as we orbit the sun.

So whilst i’m being hailed as the ‘Real life Carrie Bradshaw,’ YOU are being gummy stickered with a sexy ‘Hater’ slap badge.

Okay, i’ve sipped more gin and tonic. I’m better now!

I will tell you that this Saturday, ‘House of Solo’ Mag owner Arthur and I will be headed for lunch at Gino D’Acampos new joint ‘My Restaurant’ in Leeds. I’m so excited as i’ve heard great things about it and…well i know that Gino was there himself, last night, cooking dinner for everyone! Arthur at ‘House of Solo’ and I have ended up being ace buddies. We’re both passionate about our goals, where we want to be and our own bit of business. He shot Tom Zanetti the other night for the front cover of his mag. I met Tom at the Leeds Lifestyle Awards, as he gave out the award for ‘Best Club.’ I’m definitely going to make him my new Leeds ‘hang out’ mate. As i’m sure (even though i’m doing Manchester a lot of recent) that all three of us going to help put Leeds on the map! 🙂

See! Northerners are known for having a good time. Yet we can also do business quite well to. 😉

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Magical Christmas, Tequila Dance Banter

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Busy day! But worth it!I had a MOUNTAIN of work to shimmie through and not even in nipple tassles! I was absolutely shattered through most of it, as Ruby had decided to wake up every 3 hours all night, incase Santa was coming. Yippeee! It’s the beauty that all working Mums have to endure. Lol. Yet, I got on with it….and with a coffee spritzed *wink.* Working your day job and building your own personal empire, as a single, working Mum is so hard it’s hilarious. 🙂 However, being the glitzy bit of champion that i am, I reckon things are only as hard as you make them. Winners find solutions and all that jazz. I will also say that winners don’t talk shit either. 🙂 I hate it when i encounter ‘flakey’ people, who say they’re gonna do something but don’t. The little things don’t bother me. It’s just the big things that can make a difference. However, i’m not like that in any way. So, that’s something to do a ‘tequila dance’ for! If i can’t do something, i’ll just tell you and if i can…I WILL SMASH IT.

That came out of nowhere. But only because i keep having these flashbacks of my Hollywood times, where we (my friends and I)  all needed help and couldn’t find it ANYWHERE. Some people banked their dreams on people’s words, instead of looking for actions. I was one of them. Well hen i was a young 20 something anyhow…Yet West Hollywood and pavement pounding in a world of Entertainment, going from audition to audition, toughened me up and i caught on fast. Later on in life, as i grew up and did a it better, it reminded me to never let anyone down. OR to at least be honest when it came to my capabilities. *The gin and tonic is now getting poured.*

Anyway, away from that i’m actually feeling pretty good! It’s my birthday in EXACTLY SIX DAYS. I’ll be turning thirty six, which is hideous on all levels, but hilarious all at the same time. I don’t know whether i want a loud one or a quiet one. But i’ll celebrate the day i was born, as why not!!! If you can’t celebrate your birthday what can you celebrate. People always forget to celebrate who they are, the day they were born and the days like that that matter. But we’ll fricking celebrate everything else won’t we?

I’m excited for Christmas, as when you’re older, having kids makes Christmas time magical again. I get to relive the magic with Ruby and Junior almost every day through December and it’s such a marvel to them, that it makes every inch of my soul smile. I’m radiating this magical glow of giggly happiness. Just seeing their excitement for make believe and magic is wonderful. Its what dreams are made of.

Infact, I don’t know how any adult, without kids, celebrates Christmas? Drinks with friends, mistletoe kisses with the boyfriend? Family dinners with the in laws? It’s just not as magical is it? I mean what do you do, other than drink wine and mull around by yourself in a party hat with ‘Spice World’ on in the background.

But nonetheless, i really do hope you all have the most magical Christmas ever, regardless as to what you do? Or who you’re with? Or how you choose to spend it! As long as you’re doing what you want and you’re happy with the whole shabam, then surely it’s mulled wine flavoured  *can can* kicks all around.

Saying that, as much i as I adore Christmas, I won’t lie, there was a part of me today that wished that I could *blink* and find myself floating around, in a neon inflatable ring, with my sunglasses on, the sun blazing down on my little kitty tan and with an eye watering, fruity umbrella drink in my hand and a handsome pool boy galloping around me asking me if i needed a cocktail top up.

I only needed it for a *blink* which means i must be happy really. So what if it chucked it down in Pontefract today. We have friend egg Haribo Chistmas lights above us and if that doesn’t make life perfect, then i don’t know what does! 🙂 I hate it when it rains on me when i have to go to Greggs to buy a pasty. Nothing is shitter, than doing that scrunched up run, with your head down and a a scowl face on…whilst holding a steak bake.

Infact, no, i’m wrong…DOING A STRETCHY ARMED WEE ON A PUBLIC LOO, TO KEEP THE DOOR CLOSED is shitter. 🙂 That’s really put me off Tiger Tiger hasn’t it! Lol. I’m going to Gino D’Acampo’s new Leeds restaurant next week, to give it a try and swirl out a blog. They’re excited for me to go, which makes it all even more ‘giddy’ for me. I like it when people or venues are excited for me to show up. i get all juiced about it, as it turns it into an adventure for me.

I bet they have PERFECT LOCKS on their toilet doors there! 😉