Well good afternoony, my delightful kittens of hubba-hubba. What a remarkable day. Rubes has enjoyed every second of her continued holiday via the fine art of luxury hoteling. We checked out of Oulton Hall (Helllooo 5*) this morning, after chilling, dining, running around, swimming and sprinkle our little Burmese booties with the spa this morning…and life couldn’t BE any better. I mean, since leaving the forest we’ve been at peace. I finally managed to wake up in deep longing pillows, to the ooze of silence, alongside tweeting birdies. Rubes slept like a log, after hot tubbing the day before, so when she opened one of her eyes, she looked up at me, smiled and said, ‘I’m not naughty am I mummy? I’m good.’ Awww…! Then she giggled-kissed me and told me that she loved me. She finally felt whole again and well Rubes and I make a great team. She chatted, she danced, she ran around the room with glee and even ordered herself a little room service. Like I said yesterday. After ‘Diva-ing’ out of the forest (place a used to love) I went with ‘fuck it’ and decided to treat myself and my glitzy bit of loin fruit to a luxury hotel and spa. If you can. You should. Rubes is really used to the comfort of a yummy hotel. She adores it. We then checked out, met ‘The Wunna’s’ for lunch, had a shop, a play and a quick peeky at baby animals. Then my tiny ‘little bit’ of daughter looked up and told me that she ‘just wanted to go home.’ That was my cue. She’s partied and luxuried out. We’re lucky and i treated her to everything and anything she wanted. I like her to experience life, so she gets the best of everything. Right now, we’re home. I’m watching ‘Real Housewives…’ and experiencing the dodgiest Braxton Hicks contractions. (He’s on his way.) She conked out on the sofa, enjoying a mouth open nap. I mean, any baby glamour puss, with a run like this:
…deserves a nap after luxury and a bit of a local shopping trip.
She even pulled this face today:
…meaning she scored major points with Mummy today. That cheeky smile makes me feel as though i’m a great parent. She’s like a little ‘Puss in Boots.’
Anyway…i’m feeling really proud of myself right now. I’m achieving a great deal right now, without me even knowing that I am. I saw something today that kinda shocked me and made me smile. I’ve worked hard and I’ve loved every moment of it, so it’s great to see the results come together and get ready for the big old ‘applause.’
On the love life front….I haven’t spoken to Keiran today and well I intend not to because to be honest, I haven’t missed him, I still don’t have my ring on and i’m not over it all yet. Even my friends are saying, ‘that boy needs to learn some manners’ and then reassuring me that he knows that he may have ‘punched above his weight’ with dating Le Wunna. Lol. (I enjoy that I’m a punch.)
But right now i feel happy. I actually feel powerful, at peace and free and even though I do believe that every woman needs a man…I mean otherwise, who’s going to romance us, open our champagne bottles, do the bins and carry our luggage. Mine didn’t want to carry my luggage did he, when I was over 8 months pregnant….so what’s the point? 🙂 I can’t get over that and simply because I hate ill mannered men and well it shows me that he is selfish enough to put his stubborn little boy strops BEFORE the safety of…no not ME…but his unborn child, for crying out loud. I mean, you would rather lay on a bed and strop, whilst spurting out ‘yadda-yadda’ at me, then grow a sense of man balls, swallow your pride and carry the heavy luggage down the stairway and outside for the girl that his carrying his BABY!! It didn’t really dawn on me until my chick friend said, ‘Chrissie! You have rubbish working arms…and if you had fallen down the stairs because he had made you carry your own giant luggage, with a 2 year old at your ankles, you could’ve harmed, hurt, damaged or done even worse to the baby…HIS BABY…. and all because he wanted to boy strop. That’s hardly the sign of a grow up man ready to be a father.’
…and you know what. She’s right! If something bad had happened, he would’ve cried afterward and his little tears would’ve been far too late. He learns things too late for Wunna land, which means he’s too slow, or he’s far too impulsive. He needs to find balance. Grown up balance. I mean he always calls me ‘childish’ and in ways I am…because I am a bratt. 🙂 YET, if you call someone something so much, it’s usually because you ARE that!
I don’t think he gets or understands my previous life, because when he found me i had a very normal job, was living a very normal life and well everything was very normal and has been since. It’s all about to change, as i’m wanting to get back into entertainment straight after the birth of the bambino..and there will be NO MORE.But he doesn’t get how my life actually was. He doesn’t understand why I might see people or things differently to him…? But he will. He hasn’t really dealt with my life when it’s been sort of limelighted. Boyband Jonny did…and indulged in it fully. (He was still a prick though. 🙂 But we couldn’t go anywhere.) Keiran has not experience any of this yet…however like I said, he will.
So, as usual, I can do two things..because he’s sent me a text stating that he ‘hopes’ Ruby and I are okay. But that’s not enough for me. I’ve left a fricking holiday dude. There’s not even a sorry in there. Not even an ‘I miss you/I love you/I’m thinking about you.’ I can be nice and back down. But that’s not in my nature because I’m angry at him and just don’t want him near me right now. he’s gone too far and tipped the scale of respect. Or I can tell the truth and say how I actually feel. I just think that if you’re constantly sweeping issues under the carpet and letting people get away with prickish behaviour…you sort of only end up with an unresolved, dusty bundle of ready to explode drama. It’s not healthy. I don’t forgive him for a lot of things…lots of it has not been resolved and he hasn’t apologized for it. So no…i want a break from him and well I can handle life on my own. He pointed at me yesterday in front of a forest window and said, ‘You’re going to end up alone in life Chrissie.’ I just looked back and calmly said, ‘But at least I’ll be happy.’ Then he yelled at me and diva’ed off, because he didn’t get the response he wanted.
I’m going to reply and it isn’t going to rosy tinted. Yet, I hope he’s not coming home tonight, as i’m not ready for him yet. I need a break and more time with Ruby. Either way he’ll be back tomorrow for work…which won’t be fun. I don’t ever seem to be able to catch a peace breath. But he has 5 weeks to prove himself to me and because he now HAS to. The line has been crossed. I’m going to be pleasant, yet direct, which may not be sugary sweet or nice…but honest and very ‘Wunna.’ I don’t need to explain myself because you never actually have to when you have already. It’s not your fault if they didn’t listen. Plus, people always try to make you explain yourself like it’s a must and if really never is.
On a merrier front…It’s National Pleasure Week and i’m thoroughly enjoying the idea of it all. Ann Summers have been celebrating it all week and giving away truly delightful goodies every day to lucky comp winners. I saw this today on their Facebook Page and well what better way to stay out of trouble when you’re in a bit of an unsexy slump. Stay at home and keep your hands to yourself. You break less hearts that way 😉 and keep a smile of that miserable face of yours.
For day 4 of National Pleasure Week we want to introduce a BRAND NEW range of sex toys: The O Team.
We pulled together 8 real women to help us design and develop a range of toys which would give you EXACTLY what you really want!
See the results here: http://www.annsummers.com/c/
I’m just reading through my messages from you all and I think ‘Wunna’ fans like it better when i’m tragic and single. Lol. You all love it and find my escapades more entertaining then when I’m ‘fairytale’…you horrible lot. 🙂 I enjoy one of the messages, which states that the great thing about me when Keiran told me to carry my own luggage, during his boy strop…was that I probably did with a middle finger staring him in the face.
I did! As soon as he said it, I simply didn’t moan, thought ‘what a loser’ grabbed the first giant leopard bag and heaved it down the stairs, with swag and a massive baby bump. Then I walked back up the stairs and heaved my other one down and returned to get Baby Ruby. When my Mum arrived…I diva swung one over my shoulder, popped the other on wheels, grabbed my hand bag and strutted. That’s what women should be about. Don’t let men try to think they have the better of you, when they haven’t. It made him look stupid and well…he knows it did. #iwin I don’t want you to think that all thsi is just about the ‘bag carrying’ issue. I wouldn’t have left simply because of that. I mean holy shit, i’m made of stronger glitter bricks that a little bag carrying issue. I just remember it because it was the last thing that happened. (Eww…my belly button is gross.) He needs to learn his priorities, how to treat pregnant women and how not to be so selfish.
Now to relax and enjoy the rest of my evening. I love you lots. Not long now till i give birth to another human AND pop on your telly screens. EXCITED!!
Oh and thank you for following my life.