Dolls! Yesterday, I found myself darting through Leeds train station at 6.07pm, in 9 inch heels, with 2 GIANT rolls of wrapping paper, what felt like 30 bags of Christmas cards (one 🙂 ) and, with a definite dent in my bank balance, no time left on the clock, a bag of jelly fried eggs from Marks and sparks and the best ‘people weave’ jiggy ever! I then, in the biggest rush, that my life could ever grant me, ended up landing on Platform 12A, in the exact ‘stop the train’ manner, whilst trying to text, gracefully falling into humans and *bang* onto the 18.15 back home. In one actual piece..and with fucking GREAT hair.
All that for nothing. Other than the utter need to get home after the longest day at work. BOOHOO much. I can’t at all hack it. I was on the quietest train ever, not a *buzz* nor a *bee* to be heard. I mean, i spent the day, online shopping and managed to burn a hole in my pocket, if i ever did have one. There was no stopping me. I certainly got on one and before you know it, i was buying all fricking sorts, like a maniac, who really needed to get strapped down and feed to horny lions.
I was excited. My train was not. I was sat next to a giant Nigerian man, who really could’ve been Father Christmas. Jolliest laugh i ever heard. #NOT. Luckily, i didn’t have to wait too long, as the drunks finally made it on the train. Fat ones, with old age and felt Xmas hats, dripped in lager. They found me immediately, told me i looked like a Pussy cat doll, told the train they adored my eyelashes, sang to me and then told the rest of the train to ‘FUCK OFF.’ When you’re grateful for the drunks..you know you’re in trouble. Especially, when they wore grey. Everything on the train was grey. I mean the only thing with colour…was me..thanks to my orange tan and cheap pink lippy. I was that train and then i left. (THANK GOD.) All good things, that are sober…leave.
Okay, not much else has happened, but far too much boring work, being madly in love with Handsome Keiran, Xmas shopping, ADORING Baby Ruby, drunk texts from Wazza, helping my darling friend ‘samantah’ look ‘corporate’ at Asda.( I loved the fact that i found her walking around with black pencil skirts and found myeslf walking around with a childs Elf siut and a slaggy black and red nighty. 🙂 ) The fitting room woman asked if i was going to try the Elf out fit…it was for Ruby.
OMG i actually forgot to tell you that i actually managed to get my scarf TRAPPED in a car door, that didn’t know i was attached to it, and began to drive forward. 🙂 WHAT THE FUCK! I was trying to not be a pain and hit the car next to me, with Keirans car door. Didn’t work out. I ended up getting strangled by a moving vehicle, driven by the man i love. I mean, i’m polite, but not that polite. Fuck the car door. I began doing the decent thing and screaming like a banchee, whilst belly laughing at my own discomfort.
It was over in about a minute. Then i went and got wine. *Glamour Glamour Puss.*
I’ve had a long day and only have ONE MORE day to get through before it’s my BIRTHDAY WEEKEND. WOOHOO! I’ve booked days OFF work to follow it and will now have the best ‘turning 31’ weekend EVER. (My birthdays not until Monday.) Can’t WAIT!
Handsome Keiran’s not even going my my birthday festivities..which means i can dress slaggy. 🙂 But more importantly, I’m kinda upset that he’s not gonna be there, because he’d rather hang out at other people’s weddings. Eww! He leaves tomorrow, and then that’s it until sunday. Can you even believe it? Yeah… he’ll be back for Monday (my actual bday.) However, to me.. it’s just not the same as being there for the big old ‘Party’ weekend, is it? Infact, now i’ve rethought about it, i’m actually really pissed off about his distinct lack of knowing how to prioritize. Imagine failing to go, to your own girlfriends birthday? I’d never do that to him.
I hate it when boys choose other things over me. Not fun. By the time it’s Monday, i’m not going to want to play ‘happy birthday’ am I. I can already feel it coming…