Train My Brain Barbie

Had 9 hours sleep last night! Victory!! Nothing is better than 9 hours sleep…then maybe 10 hours sleep and when you open one eye the stranger you had in your bed sheets, has had the smarts to get his things and leave already!! I don’t like waking up next to people i don’t know. I do this accidental face of  disgust, with the night before’s makeup still half on and half smeared on my pillow. I feel great!! Woo-hoo!

Anyway, i’ve been training my brain with my new Nintendo DS…which i said i would hate, yet now i’m cleverly addicted too. Well done Nintendo. I’m doing really well on it, except it makes my head feel like it’s been tighly stuffed with mashed potatoes, fuzz, polka dots and needles. I’m not sure as to whether it actually ‘trains’ your brain, (and yeah i get the whole…it’s memory games and joining dots, and adding numbers blah, blah, blah.) I think it makes you a lot less smart and a little bit more boz eyed. And nobody likes a lazy eye, do they? (‘Look me in the eye goddamit!!!’) I once said to a guy i had a McFling with, who had one normal eye and the other a tad bit, well…it was slightly ‘off into the distance.’ He was a pain in my arse and not the good kind. So i  said, when you can LOOK me in my eyes (and even though i didn’t say it, i did mean..at the same time, without one of them peering to the right) and tell me that you love me…then i will believe you! Haha! Sooo bad! I’m an idiot!

Shit, i got a little distracted!! Anyhow, for a stuck up Bimbo, I actually have a marvellous memory. Even the Nintendo DS says so.  It says I have a brain of a lawyer, doctor and Michaelangelo (which is a bit odd, ‘cos didn’t he paint nudie men with little willies and big muscles???) I remember EVERYTHING and can memorize the most random things in seconds. I’m like a superhero or something. It’s crazy! I’m especially good at remembering numbers. I can’t add them to save my life, but i can memorize them in a ‘flash.’ It’s hot!

This guy in LA who i happened to have a shuffle with, once told me to shout out my number because he couldn’t get to me in the crowd, ( i was being hoisted into the air by an army of drunks) and didn’t have a pen or paper on him or a phone. I did, thinking (oh whatever, he’s hot but…he’s obviously a drunk) and he actually remembered it. He called the next morning and took me on a date that night. He said his dad in Chicago, had taught him how to memorize numbers using his good old brain. I thought that was a bit dodgey. Who needs to use their brain anymore….and especially in LA!! You use what ya mother gave ya…(well what the doctor gave me) and you flaunt your ‘best bits’, until you here an almighty ‘Yes!’

Chrissie Wunna

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