Guy Fawks is my bitch

It’s BONFIRE FIRE night!! Woo-hoo! (Well, it’s still day…so i guess bonfire night is almost upon us??) Just incase you don’t know, this time many moons ago, some dude named Guy fawks, got a bit arsey and set fire to the Houses of Parliment (or something like that…i don’t remember listenning to the details at school??) Anyway, there was some gun powder plot, and some ‘blowing up’ of things, and now to celebrate we Brits, every November 5th, set up massive bonfires, litter the skies with fireworks (my favourite) and make a little fake Guy fawks out of rubbish, newspaper  and old rope….then THROW him on top of a bunch of blazing flames, to burn him alive!! So nice!! yay!! Cups of tea all around!

So incase you’re not British, and you do not have such a ceremony this is totally you’re excuse to SET FIRE to ANYTHING, then blame it on Guy Fawks!! It doesn’t really matter if it’s a bonfire, a dummy or a granny, have fun tonight, set fire to things and watch them burn… with toffeed apples and ear muffs.  We Brits do it, so you should too!!! Tonight’s kinda like 20 Disneyland parades at once, with a deliciously sinister undertone!! Burn things!!! Last year, i think one of my friends set fire to his sofa, for no real reason except it was Guy Fawks night!!! That’s what i like to see…100% commitment to total utter destructive chaos!! Hurrah!!!

I very much enjoy watching flames, and burning things. Everyone says it’s because i was born under a fire sign, but really i think it was because a boy, at school named Danny Shaw-town, set fire to my hair, when i was about 15, whilst i was trying to be ‘Cecily’ in ‘The Importance of being Earnest.’ It turned me on…things have never been the same since. (ha-ha)

1 thought on “Guy Fawks is my bitch

  1. guy falukes night is the bollock i preferd it more when i was a chavie i am gonig ot me pals one friday as he has lods of wood spare he needed burning and 10 crates of stella left over from a party so why not ay babe and our pal is selling knocked of fireworks lovely darts. u gonig out for it tonight treacle have a great night chrissie take care babe

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