Everyone’s being too super nice to me today. Something really fishy is going on?? I feel on edge like i’m about to get wedgied or fall through a musty trap door. What is going on?? (haha) I must be completely evil, if the ‘everybody being super nice’ thing, worries me. It’s hilarious! I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong, as of yet, apart from blow party hooters, (the ones with the red and white striped paper tubes, that roll up and roll out, when you huff down them) in peoples faces for random comedic value. It’s funny how the continuous ‘smacking’ in the face (as it rolls out) doesn’t bother them, as much as the sound of the ‘hoot.’ Maybe everyone’s just terrified that i might write about them, so they’re ‘egg shelling’ around me?? Who knows?? It’s weird though??
I’m so incredibly excited to watch ‘Russell Brand live’ tonight, as he’s always poncing around my dreams uninvited. I’ve never seen him ‘shoot the shit’ before for a whole hour, so it better be good as i’m missing Al Murray burlesque in a pint of beer for it!! Other than that i’m sniffing on a cut open green apple. It’s meant to ease ‘the fear of tight spaces,’ and I’m in a pantry. You don’t eat it, you just apparently sniff it. FYI, it doesn’t work. Anyone who has mild claustrophobia needs to sniff the scent of WIDE OPEN SPACES, not Granny Smiths! I feel like a proper plonker!