The Dislike Donkey

So i’m addicted to oak, smoked salmon, with rocket, and dill mayonaise sandwiches, on seeded bread from Starbucks. I can’t stop thinking about them, eating them, and craving for their love!! Oh and i’ve also decided to dislike people who CAN’T hit the bullet points, to a story!! Jesus Christ!! If you know me, you’ve probably heard me say it a million fucking times… Please, please, if you are telling me a story…DO GET TO THE BLOODY POINT, instead of meandering around the parts that don’t really matter. I don’t need the scene to be set, as i’m not really listening and i don’t really care, (unless it’s juicy).. just tell me what happened, hit the vital points of the story, and be done!!! GOD!!! Some people just go on & on & on!! hahahaha!! Makes me want to paper cut my eyeballs!!

Anyway, i had a great day today, even though i’m sick. I failed to find anything suitable to wear to a friends wedding, without trying to pretend it’s MY wedding..hahaha. The only weddings i’ve actually ever been to, are my own. I’ve always been the bride, and could’ve been the bride almost 11 times, no joke!! It’s hilarious! I don’t even know what to wear to a wedding, other than a giant wedding dress?? Ah well!! Whatelse? Oh yeah, if you’re a guy trying to hit on me, DON’T do the thing where you get in my eyeline, and stare at me for ages…it makes me feel uncomfortable, and when girls feel uncomfortable they usually DON’T put out…just for future reference!! I mean, some do, for sure… but i’m a slut, and even i’ll lift the ‘PASS’ card at it, so i’m betting it doesn’t really work, as well as you think? It’s off putting. But if you’re handsome…it’s HOT!! (hahaha)

Another thing i dislike…whilst i’m on the ‘dislike donkey’…yeah…don’t know what that means?? Erm…lots of photographers have been giving me USED & SOILED panties, at shoots… to wear!! USED!!! Under NO circumstances should they ever be recycled, from model to model!! If i’m not breaking polka dot panties, fresh from a packet, or with the tags still on, them i am SOOOOOOOOOO not happy!! It’s happened a lot. One time, a photgrapher had given me a  lovely fresh new thong and after the shoot, he wanted me to leave it there (fair enough)….I shot with him again, like 4 weeks later, and he pulled out the exact same thong, still mushed on and SOILED in by moi…and said i should re-wear them!!! God knows who else wore them??? It’s just not good form. I don’t think a cocktail of STD’s via mucky thongs, is even nearly a treat worth having!! Hahahaha! Dirty bastards!!

2 thoughts on “The Dislike Donkey

  1. I don’t know if the UK has the equivalent of our wonderful Cal-OSHA laws, dear, but in California, those shutterbugs could find themselves before an administrative board for their neglect of the laundry.

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