Erm…so a certain someone, i’ll call her ‘Trollop,’ has basically just called my pink phone, and asked me (quote) ‘ What am i trying to prove?’ Umm…..?? I’m confused?? I kind of just said, ‘ i don’t get it,’ and tried to hang up, yet her evil tongue works at the speed of light, and jumps down my phone and into my face with a …’ With getting your tits out!!’ ‘Trollop’ (unfortuanate nickname yet totally deserving,) so happens to be an aquaintance of mine, and has discovered that upon the phone of her ‘sort of new’ boyfriend, is a naked picture of me. I say yell at him, not yell at fucking me! What am i trying to prove??? I’m not trying to prove anything really, i’m too lazy. I don’t know what she wanted me to say….?? I’m proving all asian girls are sluts?? I’m proving you really can, not wear a bra, in a barn in England?? What??? She unfortunately didn’t find this too funny…Ofcourse…i’m shit at jokes!!
So i ask her who this ‘boy’ in question is??? And when she says his name, i’m kind of thinking, ‘Oh SHIT’ i really did have sex with him one hundred and one times… ages ago, during my slutty 2005. So it tell her (honesty rocks in these situations) and yep ‘Trollop’ decides to go all one legged, ‘Heather Mills’ on me. (talking about heather mills, i had no idea she use to be a high class prostitute. You learn a new bit of history everyday.) Anyway, I then inform her that ‘Boy in question’ has apparently shagged everyone, and in 2005 i too shagged most things with a pulse (yes it is shameful, but give me a break i was lonely, and troubled) and that it really didn’t matter, as he obviously (even though i’ve never seen them together) loves her dearly, and that she too should enjoy the sites on my website.
She stays pissed off, claims she will never EVER put her pure ‘Trollpey’ eyes anywhere near my porno website (haha)…which actually makes it a lot easier to slag her off behind her back…lol… and then hurts my pink phone by hanging up on it, quite abruptly. All i can say is….we should all lay off bashing Heather Mills so hard. The chicks only got ONE flipping leg for Gods Sake!! You know that joke, that boys in britain are always saying that they once slept with a girl with only one leg, and they had to take it off and leave it to once side, before they did the dirty bonky….(if not, i must have just dated some shit men), well heelllloooo…it not a joke for her!! Its like her REAL life!! Cut Mucca some slack!! What is that bitch trying to prove??? hahahaa