Welcome to Chrissie Wunna's Blog!

Leaving it to Fate…



So, i worked all the way through the bank holiday, moaned all the way through it, yet was merry in the fact that I had lined my glitzy pocket with more dollar to make life that little bit more delicious. Then I got excited about holiday booking. We do that don’t we? I mean, I when i resided in tinsel town, I never used to get that excited about holiday booking, as life was one long, fabulous holiday. However, now that i’m working much harder, funding the lives of my loin fruit and doing it wonderfully..and in heels…i now quite enjoy a break. I can’t wait. Sunshine here I come. It’ll be the babies FIRST abroad holiday and well i plan to go twice this year. I’ve finally got to the ‘babies more grown up’ stage, meaning life is much much easier. Now i can thunder through money making with a *Ka Pow.* (I’m exhausted but i have so much help, that i’m lucky. Plus, working bank holiday was ace. I enjoyed great banter with new faces.)

Other than that i’m on a countdown, under glitzy pressure, but going to ace it like a champion. I’m honoured to have a ho neck. My neck is FABULOUS now, after thyroid surgery. I feel all swan like…and less like Frank Bruno. The rash is saying ‘good bye’ after steroid cream kicked it’s arse and well i’m feeling rested, happy and together. One of the great things about working the bank holiday is simply the fact that everyone has gone back to work and moaning today and well i’m HOME! Yippppeeee! Day off much. (I’m sat with Ruby packing. I’m proud of her because she’s super good at throwing things out. She’s ploughed through her toys and chosen to lob a fairly grand deal of them in the giveaway box. Lol. SEE!! I’ve raised a good girl, not a material girl after all. )

I’m quite busy and going through a lot, but i’ve cut myself away and plonked my merry, focused self in my own little bubble of life. I’m loving it..and well when i pop open, life will be AMAZING. Like the psychic said, April has been heavy…but i’ve almost done it. Apparently i’m ‘dancing around Maypoles’ next month, symbolizing happiness and good times. I’m so glad that it’s metaphoric as i’d hate to be putting my back out around a goddamn Maypole….literally. :) I’ve almost got through April!!!! I’m breathing, i’ve worked MY ARSE OFF and well the results, with my heart in the right place, should be exactly the way I want it.

I mean, what can you do, other than live and hope life gives you choices that makes you smile in the long run…



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Yes! I’ve finally made it to my day off…even though I had one on Wednesday! :) However, as i’ve said i’m weirdly more of an academic or an entertainer than I am one who has her forte in the art of tedious labour. :) I love it though…even though yesterday was super busy and it got to the point where it seemed everything was difficult. I kept getting ‘dagger’s off people, who didn’t quite understand how long i had been working for. :) I princess smiled at them…and then got on with it, as I clock watched.

Drank LOADS OF WINE last night and enjoyed every minute!

Woke up this morning, looked at holidays that i’m going to book and then ‘Yeah baby’ I FINALLY got to snuggle my babies and welcome them into EASTER! I have a big family day today. Grandma, Grandad, my brother, my cousins etc…the babies…we’re all lunching and spending time together in the name of some religious holiday..even though we’re Buddhist. I can’t wait to see my baby niece Holly and well any time Easter comes around or any holiday at that point, it’s always ace as it’s just another thing that brings families closer together. I couldn’t really get much closer to my family, as we are as tight as we could be. However, Easter is all about having chocolate for breakfast and enjoying it with your family…after an easter egg hunt. All ace! All happy!

I’m knackered. I’ve done my ankle in. But i’m loving. I can’t WAIT TO GO ON HOLIDAY! Booking shortly. AND i’m also moving, yet that seems to be taking ages, as i’m far too lazy to pack boxes. That’s why I always travel light. Keiran has said that he would help, after he talked to me on the lawn, a we sat in the sun. I made a heart out of a dandelion and he discussed us maybe ‘future re-dating’….with a SAW IN HIS HAND. Hardly comforting. Lol

Anyway, i’m not thinking about any of that, as i have too much on. I just don’t know where to place him really? Good guy? Bad guy? A guy who attempts to use charm to get what he wants? Or a  genuine human being? Bottom line…he told me that we still had feelings for one another…and that he’s like to see Junior more.

I set him on a probation run with Junior on Friday, to see what he would do, and what actions he’d put into place afterward. I mean parenting isn’t just one day or a few hours with your baby. It’s consistency. It’s being a parent even when you don’t have your baby with you. How you choose to live your life, your surroundings, your actions….ALL MATTER, when the bambino’s are around you and when they are absent.

Consistency and stability is what he certainly is lacking and  they should come hand in hand with love, loyalty and all that other good stuff….they are the two things i’m trying to see in him, as he’s set a poor example of it in the past. I mean think of how hideous he was from September 2013 to…well March. :)

But i’m opened minded and i’ll see. The old raomantic, stable, loving Keiran back is what I fell for. So ‘Team Keiran’ doesn’t have a chance in hell when it comes to Wunna land. I just feel as though he was only loving and nice to me the other day simply so he could windle his way to having Junior. I haven’t heard from him since he got what he wanted. #verytelling And this is a guy who will text and call me every day…even when on holiday.

BUT ANYWAY….all that will make me need a gin…

I’m back working tomorrow, so i’m going to enjoy my time with the family! LUCKY ME!



PS/ A guy…a 68 year old guy asked me if i wanted to practice sex on him yesterday, proving that men never grow up.


Gooood Friday


Glamour pusses, gents and…well whoever else is reading, no matter where in the world you reside! I honestly believe that I am the ONLY person in the entire world having to work all the way through Easter, like a little money making, knees are killing, Bunny elf, who is watching everyone sips vino in beer gardens, wear shorts and enjoy family, sunshine with a side of Easter!

Ofcourse I’m dramatic. Yet i literally only have Sunday off, which is utterly dedicated to ‘doing Easter’ with the babies (and i can’t wait)..however other than that, I worked today, i’ll work tomorrow…the next day i’m free, yet bank holiday Monday…I’M WORKING. On my own! Lol. The good thing is they’re be moola in my sequinned pocket. So i won’t moan. The bad thing is…there’s no bad thing, I just like having a moan. I like money making. Plus, I do actually get Sunday off, making my time with the babies Greatness. This time a few years ago i was sat in someones appartment an an air mattress drinking champagne. I made no money that day. Just a memory. This time I can shout ‘Cha’ching’ at the Easter bunny. Easter Smeaster. I’m not even religious. Good Friday to me is just a day where you’re good? I mean, Lord knows it has anything to do with the Crucifixion of Jesus or anything. ;) I enjoy how half of the children in the nation don’t even know what Easter is about!?! I was told this morning that they thought it was Easter Bunny’s birthday. Lol. Nevermind, it’s not something you really NEED to know. Plus, ‘Blond Emma is birthing the new Jesus anyhow. Yeah, she’s overdue and waiting for her baby to arrive. I told her to do vindaloos and booty shaking…However, I then realized that I went far too ghetto on her, as she was on her birthing ball doing pineapple. (Not very ethnic. :) ) I hope her baby boy pops out soon. I’m so excited but i know how shitty she must be feeling right now. the overdue waiting stage sucks balls. (And no-one really likes that…not even the really insecure girls. ;) )

The babies are currently out having a blast in the sun. I’ve just got home form work..so i’m having a wine and a ‘feets up.’ I still have a rash. Sexy, i know. But i’m being a bit more open minded about things these days. It seems the grey clouds are a lifting. My mum told me off for being negative last night. Yet if i’ve worked all day and need to be in bed by 9pm and have the babies to look after..the last thing I want to do at midnight is hold happy conversation, when i’m knackered. I’m old now, i can’t do late nights and work early. Lol. I adore my mum. I’d be lost without her. But like all mums and no doubt my two bambino’s will say it about me, (do ya Yorkshire accent here) she dunt half go on…

Lash line, lash line…so excited. Working hard. Very happy about that, Slooowly moving. Cheers to that. Still staring at flat packed boxes that i haven’t lifted a single finger to open and fill yet. :) I’m such a glamour puss that I find it really hard to tend to ‘men’s work.’ :)

On the Keiran front…i can’t decide if he’s a good natured person or a bad, charming, manipulative person. It’s troubling me as it will decide a lot once i’ve figure it out. It he a being that always has an agenda. Or is he genuine, ind and loving? I don’t know anymore? I’m so misted over with it.

Yet it’s not a concern right now, as i have a lot on. Id everyone else working through Easter? No? Dint’ think so. Annoying. :)

I love you, i thought i’d whop out a quick blog before wine and whilst the babies are out. (My babies are ACE. I adore them!)

I think my eyelash has just fallen off (no i’m not wearing my own today :) ) when that happens…it certainly means it’s time to log off.

C-ya, love ya..

Wish me luck…


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It Ain’t Easy Being Square



Being a square is dead hard!

So, here’s the story…I decided to grab the bull by it’s horns and venture off to find boxes myself. I’m quite ‘do it now’ if i get an idea, so waiting was not an option. I’m like that with everything, hair appointments, therapy appointments :)…life. (I don’t go to therapy. Made that up.)

Anyway, dashed into town, all sunny, with Little Mix not playing on my radio. (Don’t you just hate it when you’re waiting for a song to come on and it never does. Annoying.) Busy as hell. It suddenly got chilly, paid 50p to park (bingo) and ran off to buy large moving boxes…just a couple to start me off.

Firstly…HOW HARD IS IT BEING A SQUARE!!! Oh my GOD! I didn’t realise that purchasing giantly, LARGE moving boxes….that are handed over to you all flat packed, in a ginormous square like form ,would cause such a nuisance, once it was time to strut with them! Holy shit! I edged out of that store, with my faux fur handbag clinging onto my little rash Burmese hands, with a GIANT SQUARE covering my EVERY INCH OF BEING..like a sail of a homeless, cardboard…ship? It wasn’t very Captain Jack Sparrow. It was more ‘Bouji Homeless’ person…who maybe had money. Do they exist?

Anyway, edged out of the store..couldn’t see me for shit. Edged into people, grannies, teenagers, benches. It’s still sunny, but a little windy..not good with a giant sail. I’m all square and all cardboard..attempting to cross roads, with my arms stretched to their absolute maximum either side, with m tiny fingers gripping at the ends of the flat packed boxes and my face imprinted in the centre of the cardboard. I’m edging right…tottering left. Re-huffing up the boxes and fiddling. It’s now hurting m arms. (Remember i have rubbish working arms. I can’t even carry empty cardboard, flat packed boxes. :) ) And anyway, I finally got to my car, but all i could think about at that precise moment was the fact that it must be really difficult being a square? (Bimbo moment.)

Got ot my car. Should be happy. But I then couldn’t figure out how to make it fit in my car??? Spend ages putting the pieces of the puzzle together. (I have no common sense when it comes to the menial and somewhat tedious tasks in life. I was only built for luxury and pleasure…and instructing others.) Finally figured it out. Couldn’t see ANYTHING out my back window…but drove home anyway! Got here in one piece….even had time to purchase low carb snacks. :) Then my hair fell out and annoyed me. So to make myself feel better, i booked myself a Doctors appointment for my rash to make sure that I don’t have scabies. It’s getting a bit gross now.

I’ve left the boxes in the back of the car simply because I can’t be bothered to sort through everything now. I’m knackered. Lol. I need to use my days off wisely and right now cottage pie seems a better option.

I’ve also just realized that it’s 2pm and well Keiran hasn’t been during my absence to get his lawn mover and other random stuff that he had outside, before it lands in a skip. I’m rubbish at saving things for people. I’ll just throw it out. Lol. Things have been really odd and tense between us of recent, even when i’ve been ignoring him. It’s like no matter how hard we try, our line of connection keeps boinging back at us, even when we snip away at it, as hard as we can. I thought that by cutting off all contact, he would be forgotten about. Instead…now i have a rash. Thanks Cupid.

So, yeah anyway… today I learnt, not to ever be a square, or buy things that don’t fit in my car. And to always get someone else to pack all your stuff up for you. :)

Love You Mucho.

Wunna x

ps/ I just re-read that ‘move out’ text that Keiran sent me and it made me cry. Aug 28th 2013, go back to it in my archives ——->

pps/ He’s just arrived.



Sunny Stress and Babies at 11



Gorgeous week of weather but I’m stressed up to the max, as everyone else undertakes barbecuing, beer gardens and bikini tops in baby oil. (Hot weather in the UK is always chilly to me, although I do love it. Growing up in LA and swishing around a hotel pool with cocktails, in the 80 degree heat at 10am, makes every other kind of sunny weather seem nippy. (I’m having a flash back of drinking 8 bloody mary’s for breakfast with all my guy model friends…i have no idea why I only had hot model guy friends or gay friends, and Jesse Metcalfe was pool side eating chicken wings, in his basketball cap, with his shirt pointlessly ON. :) Some guy then stopped me mid-paddle and told me that I was the ‘hottest girl in the world.’ Then some other guy stopped me and called me ‘an idiot.’ :) Welcome to my life. ) I’m now in Pontefract, being a mum of two. I’m super happy about that part and super happy to be earning dosh and creating a beauty line. Yet i have a rash, a bunch of stress and elderflower mixed gin in cans. I hate pressure and i’m under it…hence the rash. When i’m stressed the thing I tend to do is push everyone away and deal with it all myself..quietly, in a corner, as I puzzle, figure things out and drink wine.

Today, i have a day off and I need boxes. I’m moving and haven’t packed a thing. :) This end in me throwing everything out in a giant skip. :) But yes, i need boxes, big boxes and someone else to pack them, I think! :) I’m lazy like that. When I was married to Mike in LA, whenever we moved he would NEVER EVER let me LIFT  finger. He BANNED ME from doing anything that was remotely hard labour and simply because he was a gentleman and his dad had always taught him that ladies should never have to tend to such nonsense. It was men’s work. I miss that!!! And I don’t mean jsut having a man to do the carrying. I mean Michael’s good morals when it came to things of that sort. It wasn’t even half bad. He was great and classy, when it came to being a gentleman. I actually learnt a lot from him and when I go back to LA, i’ll no doubt remember to tell him.

However, yes…today…i have to do it all by myself. Nothing’ll get done. I’m not in the mood and my hair is too big. My hair’s doing, ‘Miss. World.’ I’m breathing, i’m relaxing and well my parents have provided me with a calm blanket of comfort. They have been around every evening to make sure their little girl is okay and they’ve also spent quality time with the babies. (Ruby is amazing right now, so happy, clever and confident. Junior is hilarious and simply because he’s always having a blast. Yesterday when I picked him up from nursery after work. The sun was out, the radio was playing, I had cracked the windows down an inch and he raised both arms in the air, laughed out loud and shouted ‘YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAH’ literally ALL THE WAY HOME! They’re getting on perfectly right now and when you’re a Mam having your two bambinos be so close makes your heart melt. They’re worked out their own pecking order. Rubes is obviously in charge, yet Junior will only let her boss him about ot a certain level before he needs anger management. It’s cute. :) He spent the evening prank calling people from my phone’s contact list. He sounded like order 47 from a Chinese takeaway menu, followed by a belly laugh.)

Sorry. I get carried away when i natter on about the babies. It’s the Summer, it gets me excited and my heart fills with extra love for them.

I woke the other morning to my Daddy singing as background noise and it was wonderful. He had stayed over the night on the sofa, (poor thing) just to make sure I was okay. I have a great dad. I woke up at 6am and heard him merrily singing downstairs and it brought back a flood of happy childhood memories, y’know that rush of happiness that you get, when you remember the amazing times you had a child. It felt so great that I could never ever be without my family. I feel lucky. (I hope this rash isn’t scabies?)

Anyway…on a news (and not about me) front a 12 year old girl has just given birth to a baby girl, and the father is only 13 years old. Her 27 year old mother is now the youngest grandma in the UK and holy shit, what a terrible story! I mean, she’shad the baby now and life is a wonderful thing,s o my blessings go out to the baby threefold. YET, OMG…parenting much? I am such a snob when it come to ages that ladies give birth and i’m not afraid to say it. I mean, my Mum created and developed the Young People’s Sexual Health Clinics nationwide….where she advised and safeguarded the young…on sex. When I was younger (and maybe because of the people i grew up around,t he way I was raised, my environment…my school etc…) but I thought 15 year old and 16 who were falling pregnant were hideous!! :) I just couldn’t believe it, because I couldn’t  believe that they were sexually active, I and just thought that they were chavs. Lol. I felt like that they didn’t thinking of how they were going to fiance they’re children’s future, send them to private school or anything (note this is when I was 15 :) ) and well I thought that they were either misguided or needed to be loved.)

I still actually think that way. :) I’m not a fan of teen pregnancies. I mean it’s hard enough for some people to handle at 30 something. You can’t do it at 12! She was pregnant at 11 years old and her Mum had her when she was only 15!!! Surely, she would advise her child aptly and give her the correct sex education needed because of this. Or do people just think it’s okay to birth babies at 11, 12…15…? I hate all this modern world stuff. Lol.I’m a proper oldie and traditionalist when it comes to some of my morals. That’s why I hate broken families (even though that’s what has happened to me…but only because I chose bad men, who weren’t brought up with the same morals…well Pete was and that’s why he wanted to stay. Keiran wasn’t…that’s why he chose partying. How you’re raised matters.) I just think having a baby at 12, and getting pregnant at 11 and the father only being 13 is terrible. That’s their childhood’s over. They can’t parent at 12 and 13! It just annoys me because even I want the BEST for their tiny baby and well it seems that history repeats…meaning that hopefully people will step in, break a cycle and be there for the baby all the way through it’s life! CRAZY! I can’t believe it. I’m astonished. And what makes it worse is that the 11, now 12 year old girl, just states that she is madly in love with her 13 year old boyfriend, knows he’s the one and wants to marry him? What???? She must’ve just needed to feel loved, a love that she wasn’t getting at home or in her heart and well him being a 13 year old boy…i just can’t even discuss this further…lol. WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TOO? I want normal grownups to fall in love, get married, stay married and have babies….that they care for together..forever. Fairytales only please. No 11 year old pregnant drama. GOSHY! (Snob time over. But i am a snob. I can’t help it. I hate stuff like that and I also hate ladettes, chav culture, druggies  and uneducated people. :)  Whilst we’re chatting. )

I got my first Easter card yesterday. Pete remarkably had Ruby do one, well make one for me…like he did on Mother’s day! How sweet of him. This is again a first, but a great first because like i said, he’s really turning around and becoming this great man, this great father…and showing me that he is! I’m really proud of him and it was really nice to know that he thought of me and it was sort of a ‘thank you’ for looking after his baby girl. I love my card! He’s been doing A LOT with Ruby these days and it’s been wonderful. It’s really helped her greatly. Really made her far more confident. With me, it’s the small things that I notice and remember. The small things that matter. The small things that can make me change my mind about a person. I’m looking forward to Easter. It’s going to be amazing. It’s going to be a fun filled, cake, bunny, easter bonnet, family affair! Can’t wait! Some of you will be doing a Bank Holiday partying. I’ll be with my babies. :)

Can’t remember what else I was gonna tell you?

I’m kinda cutting myself off things right now, until i can get things sorted. It’s not a bad ‘cutting things off,’ it’s just a moment to keep my head down and focus.

Love you.

The Wuns. ;)






I told you so………



ANOTHER DAY OFF! My final day of rest before I slip back into my work boots and glide back onto ‘mode’ before a delightful Easter of bunny fun with my babies! Yeah! Yeah! Baaaaby! So far, I’ve picked up sight, bantered with new work colleagues mid-travels, checked out sunny holidays for the babies, forgotten to buy boots, remembered to buy lip balm for my achy breaky lips. (FYI/ Nothing is worse to me than sore lips. I can’t stand the feeling of it. I had to nip into Primark and grab myself some Walls Mini Milk strawberry lip balm, in order to begin the soothing process merrily. It worked. That stuff is a miracle.) I also met with my estate agents, rushed around a bit more, cringed at some of the people in Wakefield (if it is 10.45am and you are gurning in pinned eye balls…you are an idiot. Pull yourself together.) I’ve run every errand under the sun. I currently have my fingers crossed. I’m chilling with my own papa and now enjoying a sunshine elderflower gin, that I got for £1.50. IT IS ABSOLUTELY DELICIOUS and perfect for sunny sunny afternoons. Refreshing, classy and fun. Just like Moi. ;)

Life is still great. I’m happy as can be. I’ve loving Mummyhood and the children have never been happier. Ruby has REALLY come into her own now, after months of feeling anxious, unsure and partially broken, due to the yo-yo-ing of a gent, who she adored more than life itself. He broke her faith. But now she’s 100% back to BRILLIANT and BEAMING. I’m SO PROUD OF HER. I have never seen her so happy. Junior (Mummy’s boy galore) is IN EVERYTHING. You name it…he’s in it.  Happy go lucky, chipper, giggly, yet highly dramatic, with a extra dollop of charm…that boy will be a mayhem 2 year old. I’ve never seen a crawler, dash so fast from wall to wall and empty the entire contents of a home out onto the floor in SECONDS. Then giggle like it was the most fun ever. You put it all back. He does it again. My Daddy has been spending double time with Junior and well now they’re super close. My parents want another Doctor in the family, so i think they’re trying to bribe the children. The one that does it, if any, will become the favourite. Lol. We tested a ‘look at this poorly’ moment on Ruby, with a spot on my ankle. She looked at it like she was going to cry and never speak to me again. Junior however, crawled up to it with a toy hammer and looked at me like he was about to chop it off, with laughter. I see a surgeon in the future. #favouritechildalert

Work is good. I enjoy making money because it makes me feel of worth and like i’m doing myself justice, doing my kids proud and making my Mama smile. It all builds up to a glorious future. Beauty line wise, all is still on track. Today I did a secret walk around the stores that i’m pitching too to see where MY PRODUCT would fit in display wise and price wise. It’s called ‘walking the floor.’ Today the floors were walked my Wunna and I enjoyed every second of it. My eyelashes are going to be ace and i’m just happy that they’re MINE and that i created them, judged the quality myself and did all the designing. (Ugh, i have an itch, my skin has exploded with a rash. It’s a stress rash. I have a lot going on right now and well it’s hard for me to express it all, so it’s all erupting sexily on my skin. Fun! My good friend in LA, DK, told me once that it happened to him. This girl he adored broke up with him and he weirdly felt fine about it. Well…so he thought…He had actually subconsciously held his pain in emotionally and well his skin held up a ‘ah hell no’ flag and decided to burst out with a case of THE SHINGLES. I know! Crazy! (That’s what’s happening to me, but with a lot of stuff, all at once.)

Once i have my lash line out and i’m all moved into my new home and well my day job is going great, so that’s not a worry..i’ll be fine. Like i told you, i’m naturally a worrier, who cleverly pretends that all is fine with a wiggle and a wink. IT’S STRESSY UNDER THAN WINK. :) I’m quite a sensitive, yet loving girl and well i just like everything to go harmoniously and mainly for the welfare of my babies and my own bit of ‘hurrah, i made it.’ I’m ambitious and I want my family, my babies and of course myself to be super proud of me! I’m getting there!

On the Keiran front, he’s now getting mildy frustrated because he can’t seem to get comfy in the dodgy bed that he made. Bottom line, if you make awkward choices, wrong choices, or choices that at the time you thought were right, that ended up being wrong…the problem with that poor choice making, is that during your poor choices, bridges were burnt and a lot of people were hurt. I know, i’ve been there, yet when i was poor choice making….I didn’t have hard core responsibilities and i did it when i was young. Being young is always good for mistake making. It makes it okay, for when you’re older…the light bulb comes on.

At the time…he didn’t care because of course the grass is aaaaaaaaaaaalways greener and oh my gosh.. partying and single freedom is soooooo much fun! And well aaalllll the boys get to do aaaall this stuff, that i’m not allowed to doooooo because i have a pregnant wife and baby, that I have to look after.  (Teenage behaviour. I swear he had delayed adolescence. It’s an actual problem.)

Well..all proper grownups, who have already lived quite a decent life and who are grateful for the responsibilites that they have, like wives, husbands, babies…etc…no longer make shit choices. They choose the things that matter in life, when life has come to an end. On ya death bed, you’re really not asking for a sambuca shot, your guy friends and that chick you once flirted with for sex in some nightclub where your feet stuck to the floor. Nor are you asking for a picture of your car, your house, you bank statement. The things that matter are your family, your true love..your children. It’s not hard a concept to come to terms with.

So yeah, he’s grumbling because he can’t have his cake an eat it and do bachelor and family guy all at once (awww) and wait…whenever HE WANTS. (Oh really? Snooze.)

I mean, who on earth glamourised the situation for him (lol) to make him think that his choice to leave his wife and family ..(his responsibilities..and we all come as one..) and do it the way he did it…AND simply for the art of partying would be glorious! HAHAA. Idiot! Who patted him on the back and told him that this would be great and it would be all un-troublesome and best for both himself and the family. Lol. Who told him what he wanted to hear, instead of what would actually happen. HAHAHA. If he was a King going to war, then he’d have shit advisers and end up spattered in armour, outside his own castle. Who does he actually know that has it easy with wives and children after leaving! Who told him that there would be no heart break, that it wouldn’t hurt the children, that a good mother would sacrifice the stability of her babies for male party boy nonsense. (Some mums would. Not me. I’m not rubbish at this Mummy malarky.) Who assured him that being continuously disrespectful to his wife, would put him in a better position, when it came to setting an example for his son. And WHO ON EARTH told him that I would be STUPID enough to put up with being treated so badly and for so long?

It’s like he had some blissfully deluded, pastel, misty watercoloured picture in his head,where he could go party with the boys, fly off to countries without telling me, flirt with women, emotionally and verbally abuse me, slag me off, play victim, distance himself from the children, do whatever he wanted, when he wanted and skip in fields merrily to happy songs of delight, as the world revolved around him and everyone catered to all of his poor choices and needs.


That’s not how it works…DARLING. You use, abuse or disrespect a girl…she will not like you. :) Didn’t anyone teach him that?  Especially if she has respect for herself and her children. Over the past few months i have been nothing but kind and loving towards him, whereas HE has done nothing but treat me with great disregard whenever i’ve been kind and every other time inbetween. I figured my kindness was wasted on him. He wanted to be nasty to me for nothing expect the negative art of holding onto the past, his own tormented childhood issues and well being an idiot. Like my friends say…he’ll learn that being married to Chrissie Wunna isn’t or wasn’t as bad as he thought. Someone glamourised the potential consequences of his actions for him, or patted him on the back with a ‘you’re not doing anything wrong.’ How silly of him not to use his own or actual brain.


Walking out on your wife and children, when she has just given birth 3 months previous is not only dishonorable…but simply just bad. And i’m not talking chav tastic bad, as i’m so far from that that level of conduct, i’m talking simply BAD FORM. Baaaaaaaaaaad form…especially when she needed you the most! Selfish..baddddddddd, BAD… form. And especially when the reason was simply  to party, wallow in self pity, slag off the lady you vowed to love, after she birthed your child , then self destruct in recreational vices and just be a good old fashioned tit, whilst telling everyone half truths about the situation. It was one of those moments (and i got loads of messages) where all normal, decent people just looked at him and at his Facebook page and thought ‘what an absolute knob.’ :) Everyone could see it but HIM. :) (Oh and his party posse, who to be honest, don’t actually really care about his future relationship with his son, wife…etc.)

Now that the girl…me…is over it all…(and it’s been ages since September, so i’m proud that I finally came to my senses…) you’re moaning because of your OWN previous choices. The ones you made yourself. We would’ve loved him forever, but he didn’t want us to. I would’ve done an eternity with him. He didn’t want me to. His own choice. His own fault.

Bottom line, if your argument is the fact that I get to see the children every day and well you don’t…then how about this thought….this wacky little concept….(and this is what I said to him…)

I get to see the children EVERY DAY because THAT IS WHAT I CHOSE. I CHOSE to be there for them no matter what, PUT THEM FIRST, LOVE THEM FULL TIME and make amends at all costs, for their stability, knowing that once the hard bit was done, i’d have more freedom to have fun and be me once more. That way i would have the balance of everything, be part of a loving family, have myself back, be working, be able to again have fun and have life the way it should be and used to be. I knew that because i’ve learnt from past mistakes! I now have the best of everything because I made the right choices. He didn’t. That’s not my problem. Whoever taught him to be a man, taught him wrong. I won’t let that happen to my son. Keiran knows i’m a great mother, so it’s hard for him to critisize me when it comes to that department. Where as my list could be endless with him…

And you see…the thing about making poor choices when you’re young is that when you’re older, you just know not to make the same mistakes again, or you have time to change the outcomes of certain problems. Yet, when you’re a grown up and with actual responsibilities, those wrong decisions..can change your life FOREVER. Sad, but true. And he still hasn’t even managed to think of a way to make it right…when it’s the EASIEST puzzle in the world…if he KNEW ME.

So yeah…you chose the single, fun, party boy life, over a stable one, filled with a ‘loving family’…so go live it, love it…be happy. We are! I especially am now that they’re at an age where the hard sleepless nights is all over. I’m in the fun stage, that he couldn’t be bothered to live through. Not my fault. You walked away and chose a different path from us…and he can’t separate me from the children. He likes to do that, he likes to say, I left you, not them. Well…honey…we come as a team. I don’t ever see myself as ‘just me’…which is why i am a GOOD PARENT. I’m not selfish. Plus, having a WIFE is an actual man’s responsibility. He doesn’t see it as one. Meaning he has no respect for women and doesn’t understands love. Yet he doesn’t have a role model for it, I guess?

But whatever, before when I was all cheery with him, was when it would’ve been easy…yet now, he can kiss my hot, loving, behind!

What i’ve newly learnt is that children DON’T NEED both parents to be happy and successful human beings…they just need full time stability (which he didn’t offer, but I do) and really good role models of both genders. They have that! Plus, he’s lucky…like I always say because he chose moi to birth babies with…Junior goes to the best nursery, will go to the best schools, be enrolled in every activity that he wishes to be, will want for nothing, be loved, have an inheritance, a trust fund and be surrounded by love daily, constantly, full time…and by very decent role models. He gets to grow up the way I did. Is that really so bad?

I don’t think so…

Lesson of the day….people carve their own paths…and when you do, you have to be ready to walk in that path you have carved and deal with the consequences that occur with it. You always have the opportunity  in life to make something right..yet until then..enjoy the walk. I mean, who’d a thought, the fun life of a party boy wouldn’t be fun forever?? Pahahaha. Everyone BUT HIM.



Happy Sunday! The day of God, day of hangovers, or if you’re a full on grown up like moi, a day of being happy to be an oldie. Life really does fly by. I even sound old saying it. But it’s true. I met an old geezer the other day, who fought jungle warfare in Burma or something? He was now in Ponty, drinking a tea for one, after a spot of cancer and a bit of a more difficult life. All he said to me was that life really does fly by and that I should be good to myself. I believed him, as far too many people say it, for it not to be true.

It’s a fresh day, a sunny day. I’ve errand run, I should be packing (house move,) i’ve peeked in new properties armed with family and well also found out that this next week is going to be a week of..wait for it..utter SUNSHINE! Yeeeah baby! I’ve also spent the morning giggling with my son and cheering up overdue preggos. Blond Emma is past her due date and should be giving life any time…NOW. Curry didn’t work. Disco dancing was rubbish. So today and because I feel her absolute pain, I suggested that she went in for the old ‘sweep and stretch.’ :) Impersonal..yet effective. I mean no-one wants a middle aged ladies fingers in their whatsit…yet if it sets off a very long 9 months of baby cooking, lets do it! Even though I hated the procedure, it was grateful for it. Em’s isn’t even nervous, just excited as in her owns words, ‘It’s got to come out somehow.’ She’ll breeze it…with painkillers. Then we’ll lunch and she’ll worry about her vagina being like a 7o year old’s..well her exact term of phrase was a 70yr old prostitute’s. :) You know you’ve made a preggo happy when they say, ‘I fucking love you.’ I’m so excited for her and well lets just hope she rolls over in bed tonight and her waters just decide to break out of nowhere! Turning into ‘Mama’ is GREATNESS. It’s the best thing that any girl could ever turn in toooo! It’s a shame that some girls, who turn into woman don’t appreciate it as much as they should. Same with men. However, both Ems’ and I adore such a title….it just brings a big old smile to our miserable, yet sexy faces. Push! Push! Get that Baby OUT! I will add that Goodhall, her lovely husband to be, has bought her an entire FULL GYM as a ‘push present.’ I DIDN’T EVEN GET A PUSH PRESENT and I WANTED ONE. I just got shouted at and then left, after 3 months of giving birth. Fun times! :) You should always date man over boy. A man puts a lady on a pedestal and treats her like a Queen…a boy is more selfish and has to live in regret when he grows up and it’s too late.

Great day today. Happy. Looking forward to ANOTHER day off tomorrow. I have a whole bunch of important errands to run, so i gonna have my rocket boots on. I’m excited for my lashes. Their luxury, so save up. :) AND well i’ve been having to wear the same contact lenses for a week straight now, due to running out and waiting for my order. Tomorrow..i get them. Wahoo! I will be gifted with sight once more! Life will be a wonder!

The babies are doing great. I’m doing great. I’m appreciating being adored and i’m loving working hard. All angles covered. The ex- Ralph Lauren model wants to now book flights to come and visit me…as does my good LA friend Jake. I’m concentrating on money making and loving my babies…as i’m almost at my goal. I haven’t really wasted any time this year, i’ve worked hard. The results will show and yes i will say again..SUCCESS….totally the sweetest revenge. PAHAHAHAH!

I’ve got a rash on my hand. I’m being called ‘Sexy’ a lot. My bra has snapped at the front. Not even sexy snapped, as in ‘pinged’ opened. Just snapped as in looks like it’s been worn for 100 years nonstop, that in a state of raggedness has fallen apart. I want to be as fit as that 80 year old, crotch back bending, swing me around like a beaver bollock granny on Britains got talent! Amazing stuff! How she did all that I don’t know. I’m impressed. That WILL BE ME, when i’m 80. OR i’ll just be the happy gin drinker at the back of a champagne bar, in too much lippy and diamonds, at noon. I would’ve said face lifted, but I after my thyroid surgery, i’d never ever voluntarily, give myself up for cosmetic surgical reasons now. You got through a lot of pain for something that doesn’t really matter. (Learnt it late. Shut up.)

But yes, life is wonderful. I’m happy. I’m surrounded by people who love, cherish and adore me. I’m filled with smiles and family and well i’m celebrating Sunday with a cocktail.

Love you!



It’s Bliss Innit



Everything feels like BLISS! I mean, nothing is better than going to bed, snuggled in with all your loin fruit, after the busiest week ever of work, to know that you not only don’t have to get up early in the morning to earn that extra bit of moola, but you don’t have to do it for the NEXT THREE DAYS!

Yes! Wunna has the next THREE DAYS off and it feels like ULTIMATE BLISS. I’m spending it with my babies, my family, my world…and everything just feels so much greater! Working hard makes you really appreciate your down time, the time you have to chill, the time you have with your ‘little hearts.’ I mean, I even duffed my ankle up and got a flair up of skin disease :)…yet i’m still smiling because right now, i’m blogging from my living rooms floor, STILL IN MY PJ’S, with both babies napping by my side and with Mr.Tumble on my telly as background.

Even my morning shower this morning felt like BLISS. Not sure why? But it did! I had a hardcore Herbal Essence style shower this morning. It sent me off to dream land, a euphoric state of ‘ooh laa.’ (I didn’t even use Herbal Essence, in fact due to work, I hadn’t had any time to buy more conditioner, so even worse I had to use budget   2 in 1 from Poundland, because it was next door to the place I was pondering, when i remembered. :) ) Saying that, it’s all down to working hard and having no time. It makes you appreciate the little things. An actual Herbal Essence shower, believe it or not is just a marketing trick. (OOh, we didn’t know that. :) ) If you get that shit in your eye, it stinks like *SWEAR HERE.* I spent my last Herbal Essence type shower blind, shouting ‘FUUUUCCCCK! ARRRRGH’ at the top of my voice, naked, slipping and reaching for a towel…in mid ‘stood in the shower’ air. :)

Ruby can’t believe i’m home with her. Love it. We’re getting ready for Easter and well my parents always kept the magic of every holiday and festivity alive. We are going to be going Easter bunny bonkers, with painted Eggs, bonnets…buns..the works. Junior’s really into it too. He’s probably more into it than Rubes. This morning he power crawled up to me, snacked a MaltEaster Bunny out my hand, snapped it in half, with his almighty strength and shoved IT ALL IN HIS MOUTH in one fail swoop. I obviously thought he would spit it out, as it’s far too rich, far too chunky, far too chocolately…NOPE! He held it in his chops, with a puzzled face of ‘wait  a minute’ and a little muddle around in his mouth, it was gone. Lord knows how he devoured it in 30 seconds…but he did..and then when I wasn’t looking he grabbed Ruby’s half and shoved that in his mouth too. :) It was fine though as Baby 1, (aka Rubes) took one tiny nibble out of the ear and with a face of utter ‘urk’ said, ‘Eww..that’s disgusting. Can I have peas instead?’ Lmao. They’re eating habits are soooo different from one another. I put a pea in Junior’s mouth and he spat it right back out at me, like he was some kind of weird half Burmese pea shooting machine.

Life is GREAT!

I am thoroughly enjoying every moment of my first day off and will continue to enjoy every inch of the next too. BLISS. BLISS. BLISS. LOVE. LOVE. LOVE.

Eyelash lien going great. A new bit of marketing going great. Day job. Love it. I have a stress rash and a dodgy ankle…but it’s fine. Babies. Love them. Being flirted with by boys…used to it. ;) (The Doctor is dying to get me on a date, but I just don’t have time right now and not looking to date as of present.) Moving shortly! (Incase you forgot.) But i’m not speaking about that until it’s all been sorted. So yeah, I have a lot on my plate..again…but i’m loving it. 2014, can kiss my hot arse. :) I’M WINNING.)

Talked to my Daddy last night about my love life. He’s upset as i’m his baby girl and he hates broken down families and he’d probably wish for Keiran to be different and not a tragic party boy, who can’t love his daughter, or commit to being part of a family, in order to raise children appropriately, yet all he said was,

‘I know you baby..(that’s what my daddy calls me :) ) Where Keiran went wrong was when he secretly moved out of the house and told you via text. That hurt you the most right? The way he did it, as now it’s too hard for him to come back in. He created a barrier for himself, so whoever advised him on such a move, didn’t know you very well.’

I just looked at him and smiled and responded with a..

‘Yeah, i resented him for that. The way he did it. It was rude and disrespectful and it was more the fact that he planned it all, had even told other people, slagged me off to people behind my back and knew what he was doing. He kept it from me. He abandoned the family and that caused too much pain, that he’s not sorry for, to each and every member. He hurt Me, he broke Ruby and Junior will now never really know him. To be honest, he hurt himself..but it’s because he has issues. I know him better than anyone and he knows that.’

Then i had a wine, we cuddled the babies and my mummy bandaged up my ankle for me. :) I LOVE FAMILY LIFE! My Daddy is a traditionalist, so he doesn’t hate Keiran at all, but he’s shocked that an actual boy or grown up man wouldn’t stand by his marriage vows, or be there  to protect his wife and children. He just thinks he’s made a flow of idiot moves that he maybe hasn’t meant to make, yet due to a dodgy upbringing or poor advisors, he’s sort of shot himself in the foot now that he doesn’t know what to do or how to come back from it, because he dug his grave so deeply. He see’s him as a mess, a boy that just has to learn things the hard way. Yet unfortunately my Father has as daughter with a tolerance line. That he raised her to have…but only after I had compassionately done or offered all that I could help-wise, heart-wise before letting go. My Daddy is a love bunny. He’s a compassionate man, who taught me empathy. Both my Mum and dad are. They always told me that it was about understand people. Yet Keiran took the piss…so now i’m like (and it took me a long time of getting over, and in the end giving him chances)…’AS IF.’ He should of run in when the door was still a jar open.

Plus, it’s a bit annoying for my Mum because the money that my Dad paid for the wedding…it was a normal wedding amount…I don’t even know how much, but I do know it was around £30,000-ish?? If Daddy knew that Keiran wasn’t serious about being married and taking his vows, and that his word wasn’t his bond…well that money wouldn’t have been wasted and instead could’ve gone towards the grand children. That’s £15,000 each that they could’ve pocketed. Silly boy.

However, enough of all that!

Everything is so positive and perfect now.  I’m happy. This weekend is going to amazing!!! (I should really be packing or sorting though the children’s stuff.)

AND we’re going to be going on our first abroad holiday with the babies in a couple months! EXCITED! Two this year for them. They’re at the perfect age for it all now. And I can’t wait to do Orlando..well Disney land with them when they’re a bit ‘ can appreciate it’ older. Then Hollywood..so they can see Mama’s friends. I’m also looking forward to my LA friends coming over for a visit. EXCITED!! It’ll be ace to have male models residing in Wunna land in the name of old friends and holidaying. :) Hollywood models do Ponty. Yeah! Ruby will go bananas, she gets far too excited about it all. She is so much older than her time. It’s so bizarre. Plus, through their life i want them to experience where they’re from, their own cultures, Mummy’s culture, roots and places of resident, so there will be lots of America, Asia and Caribbean (if i must) in their future. (Ugh, my lips are super chapped.)

Anyway hope you’re well. I need coffee.

I’m off. Three day! Three day? Three days!  Wahoo! (I hate that I totally missed sibling day because i fell asleep early.)

Love you. x











Home Sweet Flattery ;)

ac16 (1)#

Home, relaxed and loving life! Work was AMAZING today and because i’m finally getting my jiggy on and being lifted from all hazes, obstacles and with a confident flair. Things are going swimmingly..better than normal and i’m really proud of myself. I’m excelling at the day job, i’m really going to do well with this whole lash line business…i’ve made some amazing new friends, who are ALL  good of heart and good of soul…and well i feel grateful, lucky and happy to simple be…ME! :) I’m celebrating being Chrissie Wunna and want everyone to know that life may shoot you down with it’s big old glory bazookas, but you can always get back up, wiggle, wink and smile, they with a cocktail, high five it, champion through and DO EVEN BETTER than you ever imagined. I can’t believe how well i’m doing and only because I’ve had such a shit 2014 so far, that even I was tested at my game of life. But i did it. I FUCKING DID IT! Yeeeeah baby! Hella YEAH! You know those moments that you imagine, where you’re doing well for yourself, the babies and the best person you could be. I’M THERE RIGHT NOW! I’m there!!! So if there was going to be a success story, it would start right here…at this point! (And thank f*** for that! Please do excuse my swearing, but at times it really does make good times better. I’ve fought this year and well the battle is over. Life has turned easy and shimmied over to *wink.*)

Great day today. So, hope you had a great one also. If you didn’t don’t worry. Sleep it off and start fresh. The good thing about having a tomorrow is that you CAN ALWAYS try again.

Okay, so I Facebook status’ed the ‘Single Mum’ thing and well I guess you all focused in on the ‘single’ part of it and not the ‘Mum’ part of it. Lol. The girls, zoned in on the ‘men suck- mum’ thing and the boys ALL ZOOMED INTO the ‘SINGLE’ thing. Like i had just declared I had money growing off trees and champagne flowing out my nipples, almost every man that may have ever fancied me, even a little decided to send me a loving message of ‘maybe me.’ :)

I AM EXTREMELY FLATTERED. Obviously, i’m concentrating on work, babies and me right now. Yet i am very honoured to have options. Lol. So, your messages have been a delight. There’s been the fans, the friends, the doctor, the exes, the butcher, baker…joking…there’s been the ex RALPH LAUREN MODEL MUCH, the Hollywood boys…and well…lots of guys from LA who know me better than most. The dudes dig in in The States. My personality fits in super well with them because they adore feisty over there. The boys are quite strong, emotionally, mentally and physically across the pond. You have to be in tinsel town. You get rejected every day.

But anyway the good thing is that most of my LA friends are now wanting to fly over and visit me, which I welcome with open arms because I miss them so much and I haven’t been able to make it due to being pregnant ALL THE TIME and now working. So, I can’t wait and i’m looking forward to seeing them, one by one, as they all carefully select their flights over! Thank GOD! I adore playing Tour Guide and it’ll be nice to have them stay with me. (FYI, I’m moving..in days.)

I’m celebrating today because i’ve had such a wonderful day and well i know that with a little hard work, you really do get everything you want. Be it in life, work, love or anything! I feel lucky. I love you.

Thank you for following my life.

C x







5 mins



Quick 5 mins before I shuttle off to work! I’m filled with excited and all things are looking good for the future. The new eyelash line development samples are here, the babies are the happiest they have ever been because I have comforted them with stability, the day job brings nothing but a smile to my face and well lines my bank balance with a very merry smear of ‘yeah baby’ and i’m feeling better than ever and I don’t mean fake ‘better than ever’ i mean better….than EVER.

Working hard, sorting out the babies passports. I’m taking them on their first abroad holiday this year, so it’s all very delicious. We’re doing abroad TWICE..so they have a practice nearby run and then a tropical exotic bit of chillax with Mama. (We deserve it.)

Loving all the people around me. My day job is making my body ache, but is fantastic. I’m so happy and well have such a sense of worth now. The love life..well i’m no longer speaking or associating with the boy in question…and I do refer to him as ‘just a boy.’ I’ve blanked him for the past week and simply because when things are going well in your life, you don’t drag in the baggage. His own fault. He’s been texting and calling…but i’ve had enough, so i’ve just shrugged him off, which is a lot nicer than the things he has an idiotic human being has put my children and I through. (Don’t you just love being a lioness! I love this phase and new that I would finally get there. *Applaud here.* That morning when you just wake up and you’re done. You’ve gotten over being treated poorly, but for real this time and you can smile, as you see that you have so much going for you. He punched waaay above his weight with me and nothing is better than saying nothing, walking out of a tanning salon and having the lady owner, stop me, pause and then say with a smile, ‘He’s an idiot and going to spend the rest of his life kicking himself in the balls. He’s never going to do better than you.’ Yeah!!! :)

So, as of right now, he’s made no attempt to clean his act up and doesn’t realise that it is actually detrimental to the welfare of his son, as it makes him less of a parent.Meaning, I guess we go to court. I have no problem meeting him there, i could’ve BEEN a lawyer if I wanted to. He can fight me with his ‘I passed one G.C.S.E in PE,’ working brain. I’m passionate irl, a strong femme and well when i’ve had enough…you’ll know it because Wunna land slips right out of your hands, just like rugs being pulled from under you…so to speak. ;)

I’m happy, I’m stronger than ever…he’s horrible (haha) how could i have been so stupid. Lol. As I Facebooked today, the good thing about raising children, especially one being a baby boy, as a single mum, is the simple fact that you as a woman contribute to a new breed of men, who love, honour and respect women. Junior’s MY boy and he’s being raised ever inch a Wunna. I mean it’s because of my mum that he goes to one of the best nurseries, he’ll go to the best schools, he’ll have great morals, learn life the way I did growing up and have his heart filled with love every day. To be a good parent, you have to set the example…when you don’t…it’s your child that will one day look at you and laugh at the disgrace that you have become.

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