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Little Productive Me



I’ve literally just dropped a bit of parma ham down my cleavage. Any time you find salty, bacon, bits, down your ‘silicone valley’ you are officially disgusting. The best thing about it was that I picked it up and ate it. (Oh shut up, it was only boob meat for approx 3 seconds. I dropped it and picked it up from my boobs immediately before nibbling.) I was glamourous the whole way through it. Then I washed it down with a ginger beer like I was Captain Jack Sparrow and called it a day. All of this, as some lady was reading me my astrological chart for the next six months. I completely believe in the stars you were born under. The moment you were born…to me…is highly significant.

Anyway enough of that!! TIME HAS JUST SLIPPED THROUGH MY FINGERS TODAY. Where did it all go! I’ve been rushed off my feet, working my arse off…At first it took me some time to get into it, as I tried to commit to my business plan, but my eyes wouldn’t work, let alone my brain, so i decided to opt for ‘fuck it’ and instead drove to ‘shopping’ to buy a giant mirror and beef jerky to snack on.

Weirdly, it woke me up…or maybe it was the mocha…(that’s my favourite coffee by the way) and well i looked at the time, realized I had no time left and shit loads to do, so i had to totter as fast as i could to the land of productivity, get home and get started. I managed to also purchase a children’s giant wooden activity box en route. (One of those wooden boxes with the multi coloured wiggly wire things, that have blocks on them that you see in banks and doctors waiting rooms for kids. SEE! Even though i’m busy, i always remember the children. Ooooh the babies! I love them. And in fifteen minutes i have to go pick them up! Nursery run much. Ugh, i didn’t even give myself time to sort out their bedrooms. Maybe they can help me do it later, and I can make like i’m Mary Poppins, which is Ruby’s new favourite DVD. ‘Frozen’ is so yesterday.

Right, so as son as I got home, I whopped open my pink laptop and with all the will in th world got through my business plan questionnaire. It’s hard work. A lot harder then you think,. It takes forever and well I had 20 pages to get through, with all the right answers…and I was only on page 4.

I did it though. I fucking did it. I championed it. So yeah…it may have taken me hours, but i sat through it and did it all and i did it all because I knew today was the only day that I could get it done…before work and babies got in the way. So the guy in America, only needed the first 4 pages…now he has 20. I enjoy whacking the ball over to the other side of the business court. I did my part…now it’s your go. I am now knackered. But weirdly impressed with myself. He’ll find his part easy, as he does it every day and his brain works in that manner. Mine’s more creative.

Today i’ve noticed that even though i’m all fire, a ball of energy, ambition and that good old Sagittarius fun..there’s a definite streak to me that is very sensible and stable. Very, ‘get your money right’ and ‘do the right thing.’ Very grounded. I’m sort of like my own anchor, that reins in the fizz of the Sagittarius champagne bubbles. ( You can tell i’ve just had my astro chart done.) I’m a lot moree balanced than i ever thought. You know those giant tubes that with one twist, BANG, POPS…and all of a sudden a streamy mess of confetti sand streamers fly out madly. Well..I’m the bang, pop, streamer mess naturally, the creative. Yet the stable part of me, is the kid that sweeps it all up afterward and puts the mess in the bin. :) I was never like that before. Now because of life, children and growing up..i’m super stable and i love it. But still fun. You’ve got to be fun. It’s weird because i’m a bit of everything, i love a good time, but i find extreme love for my creature comforts, home life and structure. I love coming home at the end of the night and having a family to adore. I love home life and it’s a shame that my love life isn’t always great because if i could wish for anything it would be for it to be right again, because my life right now is wonderful. It’s whole..and i’m a great catch. There’s a lot of love in Wunna land right now and it radiates from the children and I. I think that with the boys that I like i have immense ‘staying power’ and i wish that I the beings that i like or like, had immense staying power also. If i’m passionate about something, i’m in it forever and i love that about me. Life is going really well…when my life is going well…i sort of like to share it. I’m like that always…Yet i guess everything happens for a reason and timing is everything. (My boobs feel wibbly…i need to put a bra on.)

Okay, just a quicky. I need to go get the babies now and then pick my mum up from work. I promised Ruby that I would take her yo dinner tonight at Xscape. So we’ll see if she still fancies it.

Must trot. Love you all.

I’m back to work tomorrow.

Oh and you better all buy my lashes. I’ve worked my booty off on it.

clash1 clash







Glammy not Clammy


Morning bitches! Dolls! Kittens! Glamour Pusses! Kids! Mums! Boys! Ladies! (ooh…oooh de ladies!) I’m overly chipper today because quite frankly it’s MONDAY and i’m NOT AT FLIPPING WORK! Hurrah! Drinks all around, with a wiggle and a coffetti shower. Now, i’m not afraid of a good old days graft, yet i’ve successfully managed to complete a solid 0 hour work week, after being ill and with two babies…still in one piece, still smiling, whilst talking to the dude in America, who’s sorting out my business plan and whilst emailing in regards to my eyelash line. I’m naming my styles, fun things. Well after my favourite boys in LA. They were the reason behind my ever popular wink, so why not whop their names to a style and celebrate all things ‘Chrissie Wunna.’ (I have no idea why i’ve placed my name in commas, as it is my actual real name. These days i’m not detached from it. I’m me. The grown up version of me. When i did that Hilton show, which I loved by the way, i became two of me. There was ‘just Chrissie’ and the Chrissie that couldn’t walk around shopping centre’s due to happy teens and Mums wanting to take their picture with me. I didnt’ really hide behind the mask of ‘Chrissie Wunna’ as I am naturally, showy, naturally glitzy, naturally look at me and chatty. It was more my way of managing and coping with this sudden change in ‘everyone seems to know who i am for five minutes’ without going mental. I’m mental enough, so really…anything…but wine….helps. :) (I’m working so much that i don’t even have time to drink wine now. How shit is that! But whatever, i’m doing what i do best and that is love hard, smile with a wink and make money. I’m doing really well now.

So, as you’be gathered and mainly because i’ve just told you and because  i’m actually writing a blog…i have the day off! Nothing is better, when you work ALL THE TIME, to have a MONDAY off work. I am over the moon. I couldn’t even sleep last night because I was that excited. My days off are now for errand running and catching up on the work that i like doing, ie/beauty line..auditioning etc. I want to make my mark and right now, i think that i’m gonna. Plus, i have the entire next weekend off to knuckle down and get going. (I’m currently having a flash back of a conversation I was having to an old friend in Morrisons, who was adjusting Mr.Kipling cakes on the isles to pretend like they were working hard.)

Another thing…why is everyone winning the lottery?? As you know…had message convo’s with Matt Myles who won the Euromillions. I think that’s simply because anyone that lucky must have some great karma. Very jealous. But very happy for him. Went into work the other day and a lady that i see every day…she’s 30…told me that she had won it too…well won £1 million,just before Christmas…ON A SCRATCH CARD! I’m surrounded by lottery winners and even though i’m one to work hard for my fine earned, Prada bag buying pences…when you win a bunch of money…it’s just better innit. It’s sexier. I actually feel bad for that girl who won the million on her scratch card because chubby taxi drivers keep asking her out and trying to woo her, with the best kind of wooing, a chip butty taxi driver could give. She sort of liked him but because she had split up from her hubby, she just wasn’t ready to date. I asked her if he was ‘fit.’ She said no, but he was a nice guy. UGH! HAHA.

I’ve decided that i’m quite superficial, when it comes to love. I like arm candy, eye candy, a good looking, great bodied guy. Maybe that’s why i’ve always dated younger? But i’m a swine for it. I’m shallow when it comes to chosen life partners. I did explain to her that my shallowness does get the better of me and i’ll always learn the hard way. Yet, just nice guy, doesn’t cut it for me. Neither does, ‘just hot.’ But i seem to be able to forgive a hottie faster than most…and i think it’s because i’m a fore sign. I’m quite masculine when it comes to love and sex and i don’t know whether it’s because I learnt it from my Hollywood guy friends, as I was always surrounded by boys, or whether, i’m just naturally like that because i’m a Sagittarius. Really. I don’t know?

I told her that i was the cougar, who will eventually settle down with the annoying toy boy, who uses me for everything that I am..as obviously i will be a giant success by then. She smiled, didn’t judge and showed me a text from the taxi driver, who i think called her’ beautiful.’ Very sweet. that’s nice. I just enjoy eye candy. I can’t have sex with someone unless i think they’re a dreamy hot. I’d rather take a vow of celibacy then have to put out with an average. :) HAHAHA. I am awful.

On the kids front, my babies are amazing. They’re both so smart now and i don’t mean that in a ‘aww they’re clever’ kinda way, like they’re actually super clever. I don’t know how? But i’m chuffed! Juniors trying to chitter chatter, Ruby is ever the actress. Yet more than anything they are closer than ever. When they’re apart they MISS each other so much, to the point where once reunited, Junior flings his arms around Ruby’s neck with squeaky glee, closes his eyes and just hugs her, as she hugs him back. If she cries, he power crawl up to her, rubs her back and gently pulls her hair out of her face, before scowling at whatever has made her weep. It’s things like that make you proud to be a mum. They’re great kids and they’ve weirdly been raised super well and by ME!!! Insane innit! HHAHA. Ruby’s mind is on fast forward, I don’t know how she knows so much….but she does. Junior is clever in the sense that you can give him anything and he’ll know what to do with it, from observation. Give him a tv remote, he’ll try and change the channel. Give him a hair brush, he’ll then start brush his hair, give him a pen, he’ll write, give him a phone and he’ll pale it up to his ear and say ‘Hiya.’ Give him a banana and he’ll do a monkey face and eat it. Both babies are super quick learners. They must get it off me. ;) Strut..strut..pout.

So, this morning, i managed to submit my audition, slightly hard as i had Junior plonking hand prints on my freshly fake tanned legs and Ruby crying her eyes out because she wanted ‘Frozen’ on before nursery and to not be in a yellow dress? I was sat at the dining table, typing away, with the circus that is Wunna land going on around me, trying to sell myself to important folk, but i did it with far too giant eyelashes on and too much lipgloss.

Got done thought didn’t it. Missed a bit out, but that happens. Once you’ve sent it, you always think of something that you wanted to say, that you didn’t. Then i drove the babies to nursery, drove my mum to work, dropped my brother off in Barnsley, grabbed a sarnie and shot back to blog, and sort out my business plan.

Life is good right now and i’m feeling really lucky. I have everything in the world, all going my way.

I’m happy.

I love you.

Stay Glammy, not clammy in the sunshine dolls.

Chrissie x



Turning them into ‘real.’


Afternoon, my gorgeous drips of luxury. I’ve missed you and hate that i haven’t managed to fit in blogs. It pisses me off, just as much as it narks you off too. I mean, you can’t be a blogger who doesn’t blog. But, I have 1 more days of hard work, work and more work, then i have a straight 2 weeks OFF, to blog like a wordy geek on heat and pretty much finally get to tell you everything that is going on in my rather glitzy, but shattered head. I will begin that telling you that the weather report on my phone lies. Why i didn’t just think to look out the goddamn window, i just don’t know? But yeah, I didn’t and went by what my app told me. Stupid app swore down that it would be sunny, so i reached for my little shorts and hoochie top…flip flops of wedginess and everything. Tended to Ruby/Mummy day in Doncaster. Cold as fuck. Windy as can be. I looked like a twat. And obviously because i’m one to be quite overdone and be quite OTT,  i looked even more foolish, like i was trying to hard to be hot! The only way I can describe it…is like those 12 year old gypsy girls who walk around Xscape in Castleford, in their neon belly tops and booty shorts, smeared in too dark fake tan and eyeliner. This morning…i felt like i had been elbowed into such a box…(even though i swear down that I trump all glamour with my own sense of class and ‘ooh laa,) especially when the breakfast line at Debenhams,which was made up of middle aged frumpy women at 10.30am, decided to hate on my booty, with cross faces and stern eyes. I think i’ve naturally got sexy down, even in joggers. (Modest I know. ;) ) So once done up and if not done right for the occasion, i really can look like a prize donk. I actually don’t mind them hating on me…and mainly because it was funny and Ruby stole the limelight anyhow. Yet, don’t hate on me when you’re stood near BACON. That doesn’t make you win EVER. I’ve always said, if you’re going to get bollocked, fired, dumped or hate on someone mid argument…make sure you look FABULOUS. If you look HOT doing anything..you automatically win. :) If you’re by bacon and you’re middle aged and maybe not dressed to win at life…you’re in danger. :) ( Wow, i really am full of shite.)

But yeah, Ruby/Mummy day went down a treat, except we were both super tired today, so we sort of did everything for a little bit then threw in the towel, agreed to go home, plonk on comfies and chill with warm bottles of milk and cups of tea. Then we made phone calls to beings that comfort us, to make us remember that the world is a safer place and just like that…we were happy. We’ve done shopping lots now. It’s gotten old. Chill time seems perfect right now. In life and be it relationships, friendships, work, family…everything..sometimes you have to change it up, take a full break or do something different in order to appreciate what you once had. It’s not the end of the world, and really just part of being human. The people that still love you, still want you to work for them, still regard you as family, still want to chill even…are the people who truly care. They’ll always be there no matter what. The ones that aren’t never really cared to being with. (I need a massage.)

Okay, so i’ve done a lot of beauty line stuff today. I want an online Christmas Launch and i’m going to to do it right. I’ve designed it all myself etc..and chosen the lashes…created the ins,….the outs…yet even though i lash myself up, i actually don’t know how to apply them on others. That’s bad right? I mean, I lash all the time and I think nothing of it. I find it really easy peasy. Yet, i forget that others struggle. So, when a friend asked me to do hers for her, it felt odd because I didn’t actually know how to, meaning i can do it on myself…yet i can’t apply lashes on others. I don’t like that, so i’m going to learn. I want to be involved in my lash line process 100 percent. I need to be able to apply them on others, guide them correctly, even be able to stand at a pop up lash bar and get lashing people up if i needed to! So, i’m excited!! Learning something you love isn’t really a chore.

I’m working really hard to make everything come together and working really hard to be able to save up, in order to splurge and invest. Yeah, the blog suffers for a little bit for it. Yet…once up and running…i’l be one happy kitten.

So, yes, it’ll all start online and mainly because when you sell to stores, they buy a year head and well i want to begin selling NOW.

I can do it. I’ll love doing it…and well if i do and if it does end up being a success…then i did pretty well for a single mum of two, with a full time day job, din’t I! ;)

Right, i’m off to coffee up, as i have to pick my mum up from work later (she has car issues) and i’m knackered from wearing booty shorts all day.

I only really have today to chill…and recover, because as soon as tomorrow begins…i’m working full on, everyday and for the next  days. BOOM!

Wish me luck.

Coffee here.



‘Both End Burning’ Candle Much


Oh my GOD! Have I been poorly or have I been poorly! Let’s just call it a juicy bone of exhaustion, undernourishment, a dash of dehydration, an exertion of too much physical energy, day job, mild stress, beauty line and being a Mum of two babies…made me feel all hot, sweaty and migrainey, to the point of ‘pass out.’ Then I opened my car door and puked out the side of it. I didn’t look after myself very well, during a hard schedule of life and well i ended up with some gastric virus. I’ve worked all week and Mummied all night and not really slept enough…or eating enough really. Sent my brain and body doo lally…and well left be ill, poorly, in bed, from Friday 7.00pm onwards. Yesterday was literally the first day that I could actually get out of bed WITH painkillers as my friend. I troopered through yesterday, as I had spent my two days off just passed out ill, meaning the babies didn’t get any quality Mummy time. So like any great Kitten of Motherhood does, I took a pill of ‘Man Up’ and entertained the bambinos like there was simply nothing wrong. Once it was baby bed time, I flopped over in a glamourous heap, lol, took more pain killers…and rested.

We kinda always forget to take care of ourselves and wonder why we become broken pieces of ‘ooh laa.’ My body and mind KO’d on me and well because of the ‘poorly’ i’ve had to have the next two days of work in order to recover, recuperate and refuel. This weekend I learnt that you can’t run on empty. You can’t be a success and burn on no fuel. If you do, you don’t enjoy any of it. Instead you work yourself into the ground, leaving only a bleak shadow of your fabulousity, instead of that solid stamp of DIVA!

On the other hand the kids are great, alls great and life is good. i’m still really lucky, really grateful, but now it’s time to wiggle life  correctly to get my eyelash line up and running, for my Crimbo launch.

In my dreams last night, I actually dreamt that I smoked a whole pack of cigarettes? Even my dreamland is stressed. :) And another thing, I kept going through weird sweats..and I NEVER sweat…and it made everything i was wearing feel too tight? It was odd. I was even panic tugging my knee high socks off me, because i felt my legs couldn’t breathe? I mean, I could’ve been wearing clown pants and still felt suffocated?? (Clowns are weird people. I always feel like that they’re secretly miserable people, who are forced to make people laugh for job. :) I mean, people think it’s weird that I whore this much slap on, look at Coco the fucking clown, with his giant ear to ear smile glooped on his face. Poor sod. He couldn’t even pull a sad face if he wanted to. You could smack him in the goolies, steal his wallet and poke him in the eye and he’s still have to smile all the way through it. That’s not what happiness is about. Hahaha.)

I feel bad because i’m not even managing to fit in my blogs due to working so much. But they’re here when they’re here and they’re not going anywhere.

Today I need to refuel, I need a cuddle and to feel nurtured really. I need some fresh air and i’m missing the woods! Give me my forest!! I haven’t been ALL YEAR.

I got flung a ‘Damsel in Success’ book, which is a book to help women in business, just now. So I’m having to read it today and make use of my two days off. So see…even when i’m meant to be chilling…i still end up having to work some part of me. I’m best at working my ‘wink’ but with a migraine, it’s not as effective. it kinda looks like i’m an old biddy Asian, trying to hit on a youngster. It’s an achey wink rather than a quick, yet gentle punch of glamour.’

But whatever i’ll stop moaning now. I’m feeling MUCH better and well after Tuesday, i’ll be back on track. But i actually need to get better by tonight, as Ruby and I have our ‘one on one’ day tomorrow…

The good thing about being ill, is the fact that i can indulge in Catfish marathons and Real Housewives episodes. My FAVE SHOW EVER and I haven’t been able to watch it in MONTHS!!

It’s in in a second, so i’m going to have to love you and leave you.

But yeah, like a FB photo that i share last night,


Winston Churchill said that.

There you go, a bit of history. Now love it and get going. :)

Oh and don’t burn the candle at both ends…you’ll feel really shitty for it.




Hip Hop, Ruby, Salon Day


It’s ages since I got those flowers and sighted Baby Howel aka Baby Wazza, meaning i haven’t managed to fit in a blgo for an entire WEEK! Wowzers! Lots and lots has happened, work wise, success wise, in the home and emotionally…but mainly and more than anything, the number one thing that has happens is WORK.

Yep, I have been working my pretty little arse off and well…you can jump off the cliff with your fingers crossed, stand ten feet tall after 2 bottles of wine, or you forget about chancing it…and dedicate yourself to hard flipping work, in order to get the results you want. It works. Plus, i’m fricking lucky. Meaning, my life..right now…is PHENOMENAL! :)

I worked the entire weekend and well i’ll work through this whole week. Today is my day off, so Ruby and I had our ‘one on one’ day, which as you all know consists of her favourite, which is shopping, posh dining, mild kiddie stuff and going to the nail salon. I know it may sound bizarre that she’s always doing grown up stuff, yet really, if you knew Rubes…she has just always been that way. Yes, mainly down to my accidental influence, she watched Mummy and wants to do the same. However, she’s been doing restaurants since she was 3 months old and following Mummy to the salon always…meaning they’re not foreign places to her. In fact, they’re pretty normal. I’d also like to point out that i’m not a ‘toddler and tiara’s’ kinda Mum. I’m the opposite. Therefore it’s not done to beautify and simply done in the name of ‘chill. Glamour pusses, chill in their most comfortable environments. Salons, shopping, handsome faces and five* luxury….is our favourite. :) (I had to buy her another rip off teddy today from Build a bear.) I only had a brief, gentle rant because one lady pulled at a face at me,w hen i asked if Ruby could have her nails painted in the salon. STOP SCOWLING. Firstly, rules of wrinkles much. :) Secondly, I’m not scowling at you…so crack a smile and get out of my bubble. (‘To the left, to the left.’)

Anyway, Ruby/Mummy day went awesomely and we’re now home chilling, watching telly, eating mini Millies’ cookies and cuddling. I have ‘one on one’ days with the babies, simply because there’s two and just ME. (Thanks for that fathers. :) )  I think it’s important that they have they’re own time with me…as they fight for it usually…right now they’re getting on splendidly. Junior has turned into a LOVE BUNNY. He wants to softly cuddle, caress and open mouth kiss EVERYTHING. It’s worrying. But soooo cute, i could EAT HIM. He’s soooooooooooo ADORABLE. I can’t even explain it to you. Ruby is just a diva. Point blank..a Diva, even nursery say it. Looks wise, she is her father in a frock…as I like to say. Personality wise, she is ALL WUNNA. In fact, SO WUNNA, it is terrifying. We have feisty women in our family. The boys are all passive, but the chicks are all fire! She laughed at me today because she thinks i don’t know who Eminem and Rihanna are, she asked for a sword, and she talked to every stranger going. UGH! ‘Hi, what’s your name, what are you doing here, have you met my Mum Chrissie?’

I’m really lucky to have them both. We’re currently the acest functioning family ever. Things have just fallen perfectly into place now…and well i could even dare say we’re ‘winning’ at it. :) Life that is. Roll on the beauty line and then BINGO…we’ve made it. Wahoo! IN YOUR FACE 2014! Bad start, awesome finish. (Totally just Tweeted the Hip hop lullaby CD that i’m intending to purchase for Junior and Howel. Baby Lullaby version of Gangsta Paradise and Lose Yourself. What is more awesome! Our babies WILL be hip hoppidy!! Wazza reckons Howel’s going to be a goth just to spite him. :) My children wouldn’t DARE be goths, or refuse to like hip hop. Yeah they like Frozen, yeah they love ‘Let it go…,’ yeah we play ‘Twinkle, Twinkle.’ But my kids certainly get down to a bit of ‘No diggity,’ a dash of ‘Drop it like it’s hot’, with me most days! They love it.)

Anyway, I’ve been thinking about love a lot recently and well the art of love is to not always think and analyse, but to just get on with it and love. So, i’m just grazing through life, loving it and seeing what occurs. I’m a lucky little cow, frilly socks and everything. So, i’m smiling and well just really working hard. Today, i feel like i’m actually going to make it. The lash line is going to be divine. Love is always around me….it’s everywhere I look. When is comes to being a girl, we just love to be adored and cherished and comforted. We love support, respect, loyalty and appreciation. I love a dash of Princess treatment. More than anything, love makes me feel ALIVE. But so does success. :) I’m quite well balanced, or just greedy.

Lots of great stuff has happened and is actually currently happening and as always i’m ever so grateful. I can’t even believe it. I even had a random psychic women pause and then stop me in a supermarket and say, ‘Great things are going to happen to you.’ Whether they do or don’t…it was just ace to hear it. My story just ends wonderfully…that i have always be sure about. How…i never knew? So yeah, even though i’m quite practical now, whole, quit with the fingers crossed brigade and work hard to make things happen…i’m still quite whimsical…still quite spiritual and well i still think things fate, chance and luck have a bit to do with things. I mean look at Matt…(Matt Myles.) I chatted  to him on Facebook briefly and well he’s the guy who just won the Euromillions. Just like that too. Quit his factory job. Started living his life the way he had always wanted. That was chance and it worked. Anything can happen.

Anyway, i better trot off. I’ve had an ace da and a great evening planned. Y’know the greatest thing about today was the fact that Ruby saw a little girl with a ‘Build a Bear’ pony on wheels…they were glitter roller skates to be exact and with a glitter lead. She wanted it sooo badly. To the point that her eyes were lit with absolute ‘gee whiz.’ And I guess, being in a position to just be able to get her it, or anything that she wanted, without having to think twice or for even half a second and down to working super hard… makes me happy. Happiness is what life is about. I’m think i’m filled with lots of ‘well done me’ today. I’m working hard, but for a reason. :) :) :)



Life has got good


Hi Dolls! You have my absolute sincerest apologies for the distinct lack of blog writing, but as always…it’s not my fault. :) (That’s a lie. I enjoy that i’ve begun with lying. To be honest, I’m a being who always takes responsiblity for all the shit things i do. I’m one to hold my hands up and then charm my way out of it…firstly with intellect and humour, but if that doesn’t work…i just keep it simple and go with boobies.)

I adore my blog more than anything, yet i’m always either working, being mum, working or being mum…then fitting in social time..meaning that i’m yearn ing for that fifteen minutes a day where i’m on my own…just me…in a quiet corner and able to blog. It doesnt’ happen often. I’ve turned into a money making machine, still a love bunny…and well a hardcore Mummy of two! I’m doing it and doing it well!

Okay, don’t even know where I left off. I did a girls night on Monday. Did I even tell you? Working the next day was rubbish. Oldies can’t party. But it was a dinner. A great dinner. With 20 of my chick friends/acquaintances. Love them all. We wined, dined and gobbled up food to laughter. Then I went home early instead of partying the night away and simply because I had babies, work in the morning and well people around me that sort of made me more responsible, as you all know what i’m like..give me a wine and i’m off galloping into the distance to the merry sound of good times and trouble. As soon as I got home though, nothing felt better! I snook in on my babies, as they slept…smiled and was super glad for every moment that i’ve have with them. Things are about balance. Coming home early rocked…especially because everyone else felt like shit at work the next day. I was fresh as a daisy..and got to open my eyes to the little ones.

Other than that working hard. Loving it. I’m doing well right now and feeling really whole, confident and loved. I’m being more generous than ever…and simple out of happiness and my natural good nature. :) I adore giving…or is that shopping? ;) Every being that i met on…i think it was Wednesday recieved a gift from me and simply because I wanted them to know how much I adored them. :)

I FINALLY GOT TO CUDDLE BABY HOWEL! Baby Wazza…and Hannah….if you are unaware of what i’m going about. Wazza is a proper grown up now, working hard, now a hardcore family man, new baby son, about to get married…running two properties…yes super grown up stuff. He still does this…but chrissiewunna.com seems to run itself now. (I just need to be able to blog more.) But yes…I finally met up with the very witty and rather beautiful HANNAH (his missus)…and we did tea with Baby Howel…(Junior was poorly.) Hannah was gorgeous, funny and very boobied and well it was kinda great to chatter with her because I never have had that one on one time with her, even though i’ve adored her mucho.

She was funny, open, and just great. There’s a down to earthness about her, with a glammy, fun, good morals n’all twist. :) I did feel bad though as Hannah had managed to keep Howel in one pretty piece until she passed him to me. As soon as he was on my knee, within five seconds, I had already let him grab a full cuppa tea and accidental pour it on…’everywhere.’ :) I am rubbish with babies, but love them so much. It’s like me and all relationships. :) But I greeted Hannah with a hand tied bouquet from my new fave, last minute find florist in Ackworth on Wakefield Rd. It was simple, and more wild stemmy than anything, but pretty. And well, I also bought Howel his ‘coming into the world pressie,’ with was a money box, piggy bank..whatever you want to call it…that read’ Toy fund’…and began his little fund for him..:) I mean Hannah and I did contemplate whether we should just spend it on shoes…but we let Howel have it. What Hannah does with it now is on her. :)

flowers4 flowers3 flowers1 flowers7

Great afternoon. It actually feels really great to be social again. I’ve birthed my babies, i’m not back to hot, i’m working, i’m happy and weirdly super lucky??? Things have gotten back to normal. No more pregnancy hormones drama or feeling wibbly. LIFE IS GREAT! I feel like i have everything…well almost everything. ;)

Since my afternoon tea i’ve worked my arse off, but inbetween have be awesome moments with the children and well just life. I can’t believe how wonderful everything is turning out, after such a hard start to the year. But like, good things happen to good people. Life is an amazing thing.

Oooh. I’ve also noticed that what goes around comes around. It seems that i’ve been buying loads of people giant bouquets of recent, just out of love and simply because all girls deserve them. It’s just nice to recieve flowers. It’s fresh, girly and a classic call.

Work was stressy yesterday and well i recieved a text stating that I was to go pick up a little something that would hopefully end my day with a smile.

I GOT FLOWERS!!!! BEAUTIFUL ONES!! Perfectly picked pour moi and with a card that read, ‘Hope this makes your day a little better.’ :)



See! What goes around comes around! It’s the little things. I LOVE RECEIVING FLOWERS. I’m super girly and well fleurs just make me melt! Love it. Love it. Love it. Plus, it’s been a long time since i’ve felt appreciated or properly adored. So it’s truly lovely for someone to be precious enough to think that i deserve the prettiest bunch of flowerage ever. I love lilies…my favourite flower!

I’m super lucky. Super grateful. Super happy right now.

I don’t know what’s happened, but all these amazing things keep happening to me one by one? How life changes! Keep going folks.

Today i’m chilling with baby J, who unlike Ruby is too poorly to go to nursery. He’s just teething but of course, with him being a boy, it’s dramatic.

If you do anything today buy a scent. All people should wear a fragrance and simply because not only is it sexy, but it’s how i remember people. If I smell a smell that I have encountered, it sends me dooo lally. Secondly…:) tell someone you appreciate that you actually appreciate. In fact don’t just tell them….show them. Remember good things happen to good people. Yet everything you do has to come from the right place. Innit. Easy reall..unless you’re an absolute ************* (I’ll let you fill in that blank.)

Chitter bits of chatter


What’s up y’all! I’m blogging from my merry day off and enjoying ever inch of this glorious weather today. My babies are doing fabulously. I’m adoring each Mothery moment that i’m getting to have, i’ve rushed about for most of the day, surprised a sixteen year old, a hard working one, that I appreciate very muchly, with a giant lily and pink rose bouquet (handpicked and tied this morning) and a yummy bottle of champagne! (I’m a good person to know when it’s your birthday. We all need a little Wunna in our lives and well i tend to do classic, traditional luxury. I mean it was my little brother’s birthday yesterday, so i did Prada for him and because it said it all without me trying.) I think it’s important to treat little ones well and so that they know that there are good people in life who do actually do lovely things for you, when they care. How do they know…because they’ve had it done to them by someone…and in their case MOI!

However, there is a problem and the problem is the fact that I think that i only get people stuff that I like and not necessarily stuff that THEY like. HAHAHA. But whatever, it makes them smile and when you’re in a position to be able to crack a few smiles, be they pure, giggly or dodgy, you might as well!

Okay, so life is great right now. Ruby is a still ever the DIVA, Junior is the most cheerful child in all the land. (He’s literally like all of Snow White’s dwarves all in one, apart from the grumpy one, who is quite obviously a bit of a bastard. :) ) I’m working hard at my day job, i’m enjoying designing for my eyelash line…which now has a Christmas launch and well i adore coming home to my family filled with giggles. It’s almost as if, i have everything. I have everything…but a partner. It’s odd innit, because i do feel adored, as in the boys come with their googly eyes, and attempt to enjoy that ever so potential ‘milkshake’ from ‘my yard’….or whatever Kelis decided it was. But….still….it’s all about chemistry. I’m not feeling chemistry and i’m not feeling chemistry because i’m not being appropriate ‘wooed.’ I’m a traditionalist, so i’m all champagne, surprise flowers all the way. Not a shot and a bonk EVER! So, i’m sitting back, enjoying life and well i’m going to be success, i’m already on that ladder…meaning i’m got not too much to worry about, because i’m blessed…as are my babies. I’m one lucky girl.

Right, yesterday I did my brother’s birthday lunch and it was wonderful to have all the family together. The Wunna’s do ‘together’ a lot…and it’s great to be so close as a unit. We all need each other and play very different but very important roles within the family. Junior being the littlest one. :)

Tonight, i’m out to dinner with the girls. Just fun, local, but i’m still going glammy. (I’m an OTT dresser.) There’s about 20 of us to celebrate a birthday and a leaver. I’m really looking forward to it as i’ve never felt more social than I do now. My babies are now more grown, meaning Mama can get back to embracing life and being delicious.

Life is good. Life is great and it’s important that you know what’s important, but still love all the luxury anyway.

I’m actually just remembered that i had a 1pm Skype meeting that I forgot about. SHIT! It’d be alright if it wasn’t a meeting that I always forget about!! How annoying of me! Well, i’m sure after now they will certainly have a bad impression of me and probably won’t want to work with me. :) I literally and utterly forgot!


Anyway, i’m going to relax, enjoy an afternoon wine, shower, tan and get ready for my dinner out. I’m actually waiting for someone who really isn’t going to make it on time by the looks of it!!! I’m rubbish at waiting because it makes me anxious. Lol. I don’t know what to do with myself because i’m usually someone who is never late for anything, in fact always early for stuff!

I’m literally DYING for a massage now. I want to be able to come home and have my entire body rubbed down from head to toe by a being, any being, who just loves to pamper people. (And i say that because i once had the craziest, angriest massage off a psycho Chinese lady in Camden, who pretty much wanted to break every bone in my body, kill me, or just wanted to vent. :) She did it to pan pipe music too, the cow. :) ) I want a loving massage…a good one. My body is over worked and needs a little ‘ooh laa.’

Please send me massages. K’thanx x

Love you all..

Chat later..




Boys, Booze and Boobies


Today I look hot and I look hot because I feel hot and I feel hot because….i’m happy. Simple formula. Lets stick to it girls and bounce forward gleefully with our boobies and winks. Like I Tweeted an hour or so ago, I’m quite sexy today for a 100 yr old, ageing sex symbol :) and it’s the days when you feel like that, that you know everything in life is WUNNAFUL.

I have two days off in a row. I don’t have much time to blog these days do to work, single parenting and life. Yet i’m still here…i’m not very queer..and I haven’t forgotten about you. I mean if anything, I adore my blog and simply because it will always be my therapy. YIPPPEE!

A lot of work, work and working ‘it’ has happened over the last week. Boys with thumping hearts and over active boners, trying to boomerang me over an invite. Like I said, noone settles down in Summer. Plus, my life is too greatness right now, with open options, meaning that I picking a great deal more carefully this time around.

Other than that..my predictive text is a bastard. It typed ‘Cut me some SLAVES’ instead of ‘Cut me some SLACK.’ I love it really, as I’m quite fond of being glamourized as Princess Wunna…slaves an’all. Yet, it is actually really annoying when your phone just does whatever it pleases, instead of obeying your commands. (I’m currently feeling quite bad, because i’ve just turned away a very sweet male, who maybe wished for a Wunna entanglement. Well..not maybe…he told me he did. Yet, this boy is already taken..and we have a good friendship, meaning he’s very much in the ‘friend zone’ and unfortunately needs to remain there. Especially whilst he’s unhappy in his relationship. I mean, I hate it when girls guide boys in the wrong direction. Obviously, if a guy is heavily committed, married, or whatever else to a lady, (be she a lady or not)…especially if there is a child involved, it is important that you remind them of what they loved about that girl and that bonking the pretty, hot chick, isn’t going to make them feel better, if they still love her. Plus, if a guy is still with a girl, he deep down, no matter what still wishes for her to be by his side. I always say it…if the grass looks greener…water your own lawn, give it a little love and it will get better. I mean, i’m a girl that was left holding…TWO babies and i would never ever bring that hardship and all that I had to go through, on another woman. My life isn’t easy, it’s hard. Yet because of love, money and so much help…i’m lucky. That’s how I survive it and cream it over with success. I don’t know how any girl would do it if they were literally on their own with no help from family, no cash, or no love. But yes, that’s just happened…and it just didn’t realise that I was a distraction. A hot one…Men find their way to me, in these situations, because of the tan, boobies and ooh laa. Or even for the ‘trade up’ game. I’m used to it now, so unless I know when things are real and when they’re just moments that don’t need to happen. )

I don’t know what it is with Men and I…but they like me.If I was an Xmen that would be my accidental power. I don’t get, but it happens? I mean, two of my LA exes now want to date. One of them, Lee…I used to always refer to him as the Ralph Lauren underwear model and well that’s because he is…or was…he’s now flying over to England to visit me…as friends…yet also says that he’s just got out of a relationship, he’s been thinking about me A LOT over the years, he wonders what would’ve happened if he didn’t break up with me and has thought about it almost every day of recent and although he is currently in a play working, he is not going to be dating anyone from now on and waiting until he flies to England and sees me?

Y’see this always happens with me and boys that i’ve dated. At the time they think i’m shitty, but after dating others or doing life without me for a while…they realise how much of a great woman I am :) and how much they actually miss me.

Without dating him or  anything, I get on with Lee really well anyway, so it’ll be fun to have a bit of LA back here in Yorkshire.I much prefer getting on with gents than not. I hate the cycle that Keiran and I go through.  Yet apparently you only have cycles when there’s still love there. I get on REALLY well with Pete and it’s refreshing. He actually looked quite dreamy on Sunday. He’s lucky because he doesn’t have to watch what he eats or really even work out and has his accidental athletic body. He was in a vest and quite muscly. Ruby only likes men with muscles, because it’s all she’s been raised around. Lmao. (OMG, i’m sat in my living room, peering out the window and EVERY HOME has a shirtless window cleaner or gardener right now. LOL.  Mike the handy man just left. He had his shirt off, because i needed a door fixed. He had his shirt on though because he’s respectful around boobies…sometimes. )

I’ve got loads of errand running to do but can’t be bothered because i’m enjoying having two days off. I still have the home to sort out and a million things to buy.

I spent the morning booking holidays. I’m the worst for it, as now it’s turned all  five star…literally… ALL five star, for the whole entire event. If they tried to sell me a donkey with diamonds on and butlers to ride me up to the hotel, I would’ve taken it.  I’m like a sales reps dream, when it comes to holidays. Shit for my bank balance though. But whocares, i’ve had a rough 2014 and my children and I deserve this treat  now that everything has turned out sparkly.

Shit!! I forgot to tell you. I got run over my a granny on a moped at a till in Morrisons the other day! Lol. She lost control of the moped and it just came heavy pushing towards me with force, an electric noise… and wouldn’t stop. :) She felt really bad, but i was pissing myself laughing. It really hurt. But what were the chances of that happening. LMAO. Moped’s are like bulls. Don’t wrestle them…just RUN. I actually felt a bit embarrassed and i NEVER feel embarrassed EVER! I was trying to push it back at her. HAHAHAHA. ..with nappies under my arm.

(I’m currently sipping a tequila lime Desperado, in order to summon my inner Mexican. Mike was like, ‘Drinking at this time?’


It’s times like that when i miss my London and LA friends. LMAO

Okay, i’m going now to try and attempt some errands.

Love you lots..

Happy Wednesday! :)












Chilling, Work and The World Cup


I am currently baby free and completely by accident. It’s weird having time to yourself, where in which there is just you. I’m taking full advantage of it, as i’ve been as busy as they come. Juggling everything is great because when I do, the dollar pours in. Yet, these moments are now dedicated to relaxing. The races took it out of me and don’t get me wrong, as I had two days off work after the event, (one of the days I spent accidentally bumping into Harriet at The Carleton, over vino, in the sun,) but i sure as hell needed them. Now, i’m an oldie, being social…lol..something that i’m good at…take it out of you. :) *Gin cocktail here.*

Anyway, I’ve just completed the busiest day at work and with ouchy ankles and a sweaty face, i’m sat on my living room floor, resting on a giant black bean bag, with a gin in a can, by a black and white Union Jack rug and watching England get kicked out of the World Cup. (We did well! NOT!! FFs. We can’t win anything, can we.) I’ve got one more day of hard work left and then Sunday…I’M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I hope it’s flipping sunny on Sunday, the day of God. Even though I have a fabulous tan right now, i just need a bit of chill tine, family time…time of utter calm. I’m around people, random people everyday, all the time. It’s kinda good to be around those little few who truly know you and truly love you…innit…It helps you recharge, stay grounded and get back to entertaining the masses.

I don’t even know what to tell you, as I do have a lot to tell you, but I can’t get my head around it all due to knackeredness. My brain is currently like a lump of throbbing meat, doing nothing but trumping.

I’ve decided that boys have forgotten how to ‘woo’ women…or just ME. I love a courtship, a bit of romance and a bit of old fashioned ‘wooing.’ A n opebn, forward boy, who isn’t terrified to blurt out the ‘i adore you’ words.  So a shirtless picture, a bit of ignoring me, a chat up line…a whatever else you boys think is fabulous, is actually quite rubbish. *Slurps gin.* Where have all the brave men disappeared too?

(New readers are currently on my telly box. News readers, particularly female ones, are dreary. They look like corpses, that only seem to move their bottom lip to talk? AND, none of them have any other accent but ‘posh.’ They’re literally a breed of their own. Don’t mate with them.)

Mike the Handyman got to work, whilst i was away at work. i’ve returned home, with a working telly, now banged upon my wall, lampshades, Ruby’s bed now done, Juniors racing car bed now assembled…the lawns mowed, pictures plonked up…everything! He must be knackered. Poor thing. Yet he did however text me a photo of him owing with his shirt off. (1,2 3…aww.) I just ignored it and giggled. I mean, Mike is good at being HANDY. I’m the Queen of selfie and picture posing. Let’s stick to our strengths here and get back to work. LMAO!

I’m joking, I’m actually very very grateful. He’s done an excellent job. Plus, I do feel bad, as the list that I wrote for him this morning..hsi ‘to do ‘ list was super bossy. It was all ‘do this… do that…more..more…complete it.’ :) I got really into being an arse. I started off feeling bad and ended up feeling great. I rock as ‘diva.’ I’m going to be ace running my own company. The Wunna eyelash clan better be ready to yell at me, when I get all to big for my boobs. (I hate the term…’boots’…it always reminds me of miners and i don’t know why?)

Okay, i’m going, I need to chill and drink ymore gin, before work tomorrow morning.

I love you. Thank you for reading this. Hope you’re all as lucky as I!


C x

Ps, Super shit that we’re already out of The World Cup




Cash Fans, Daddies & Racing


Have you noticed that folk who are fanning themselves with cash…and that’s cash that they have either won or accumulated somehow by surprise or hard work,  ALWAYS have BIG JOLLY smiles on their faces and that are filled with utter excitement and glee? I have…In fact is has been a weekend of noticing the delightful past time of cash fanning, in almost every corner. So, if that’s the case…is money really so bad? Or is it secretly our friend? :) races daddy3

Okay, this Saturday was a Saturday of joining forces with Blond Emma and her husband to be Goodhall, with a merry bunch of their friends and work colleagues to go splash it all out, in a fancy, posh ‘at the finish line and above the riff raff’ box, aptly named the ‘George Goodhall Box’ at the York Races! We did it better than most and simply because we had a free open bar, lunch and afternoon tea in our box, with bojui service and a balcony where in which we could people watch like Gods…in frocks and ties. I knew we had it better than most, simply because people kept appearing from down below, who either scagged their way into our box (girls in hats) and others, who were guys, seemed really grateful to be there. It was all for free, all in the name of class, champagne and fun and well it was really great to actually get out (Mum’s hardly ever get to) and it was great to hang out with Em’s (her first day out after baby birthing)..Richard (who by the end of the day got everyone kicked out of a minibus outside a mansion) and meet new people! The good thing about getting kicked out of a minibus outside a manor house, that belongs to one of the gents in the party, is that life is still pretty good. :) The bus driver had it worse, especially because it seemed funny at the time to not let him out of the gates,after he did the long winded venture back down drive, whilst he was being verbally abused and called ‘Captain Birdseye’ because he had white hair and a beard. :) My dress arrived, well got opened in the morning at 8am… (Thank you Celeb Boutique.)


By 8.01am it was on. :) (I’m a quick dresser…mainly because i’m used to it and also because i k ow how to get out of places FAST. :)) My car arrived to pick me up a few minutes later. (It was sort of in the fashion of a bouji driver…in Pontefract.) Then I rocked up to Emma and Goodhall’s, in Leeds, in my whorey, but fun boobie, pink, athena, lace dress, had champagne for breakfast, after cuddling baby George, being given the lowdown of what was going to happen during the day at a white and black, glossy dining table and then after a brief bit of banter, with Rugby a the background, we travelled off,with an additional fellow to Bar and Grill for more early morning champagne before jumping in the minibus to York. Loved our box and our time there massively and well I also loved the fact that all the ladies, who were partners, wives etc (including moi) …of the gents involved in our little group were treated like Princesses. It was lovely to see men be men and girls drink champers in gift given Prada and smiles. It was fun. We had a blast. I mean, it lasted all day and all night, as I didn’t even get home until 2.32am, with a giant England shirt over my dress and heels and a big grey hoodie. (I looked like a homeless person…mixed in with the cast of ‘Clueless.’) The rest of the bunch went out partying around Leeds, for the evening after the races, as as we all know it was the World Cup…but i got to chill in the Manor House. The big old luxury pad of aceness and watch it in the comfort of someone’s home…which is always better. I even won cash and I’m even quite sure how? (Always a bonus!)



I was given betting money(very nice, I know)  and well my bets were put on for me, after I chose just the prettiest names…and ‘dadaaaaa’ I WON! Yippeee! I didn’t even realize until the end of the night, or  in fact the morning after and simply because my winnings kept getting shoved in my hand bag throughout the process of the day without me knowing. York races was GREAT FUN and because we did it with ‘ooh laa.’ (I totally thank Goodhall for that! And Ems for inviting me. We now however, feel like shit. Partying when you’re a mum is impossible. Men tend to do whatever they want. The good thing is the right men treat their ladies with a touch of Princess…making the blow of mummyhood, during the hard times, not so bad. :) Fabulous time

! races2 races3 races8 races9 races10

My boobs had a good time, they were everywhere. I only remember i have boobs these days when i’m in a going out dress. They pop out of nowhere, like the funny parts of a Carry On film and wink at people, or giggle. They were a hit and once again, I have no idea why…but right now in life I am literally not only smeared in total ‘mojo’ (boys dig Le Wunna)…but i’m really fucking LUCKY. :) I don’t know what’s actually going on, so i’m gonna go with good flipping Karma, because this last year of ALL years, i’ve been more than a decent human. They may even be dusting off a seat for me behind the ‘pearly gates’ when I die, after this last year. But yeah, everywhere i turn AMAZING things, just keep happening to me? I’m being greeted by opportunity, love is everywhere, the boys love a bit of Wunna, i’m money making, accidentally and via hard work, the babies are happy, life is almost FANTASTIC. Dreams are coming true and i’m sort of getting everything I want? It’s SO WEIRD. But do know, good things happen to good people and even if you go through a bad time (and i went through a shit year) as long as you remained great through it…and by ‘great’ I mean still of pure heart, THE UNIVERSE cuts you some slack and well as it is doing with me, it’ll give it back to you with good fortune, happiness and ‘wow…woo..wee.’ I cannot believe by luck, right now! Then to top it all off Sunday was AMAZING, because I got to spend it with my Papa. As i Tweeted, when it’s come to a Daddy being 100 there for you,like a Father and a best friend, emotionally, financially, mentally, physically..and over wine, I have the BEST DADDY in the world EVER! So good, that you all should be very jealous. By father has never ever once in his entire life shouted at me, or even raised his voice at me in anger, because he didn’t feel it appropriate and instead has done everything with warmth and love. I always get to be a little girl and i am so grateful to be his daughter. He tells me how much I mean to him all the time and it was great to do lunch with Paps, Mum, my Brother and Junior. (I double dutied it with Junior on Sunday. We did Father’s day early, with his father, over dinner, so on the actual day he enjoyed some Mama love!) As time goes on, i’m noticing how lucky i am to have such great parents, such loving, kind and 100 supportive parents who have ALWAYS been there and never let me down and worked on their marriage in order to hold our family together with happiness, love and stability. It worked. :) I love them so much. It seems not many people that i’ve bumped into recently have that. I always thought it was really normal? So it makes me feel even more special! But yeah I love you Daddy! Thank you for everything. We are the luckiest kids EVER! daddy2 daddy1 wunnatitle     Wunna land is WONDERFUL! Yeah bitches!

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