Moments

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Well, i guess it just takes a moment to completely change everything. Moments in life…to me…mean everything. They pretty much do to everyone, right? However, to a girl that whimsically believes in dreams coming true…the deepest purest love…family and idealistic fantansies that you can hopefully one day turn into a reality….moments are EVERYTHING.

I went out last night. Same old really. Good fun. But now that I look back. It was the same old Pontefract stuff, with the same old Pontefract people. But i appreciate a good time always. But like i said…sometimes you can be around a bustle of people and feel as though you’re looking in from the outside. I did the usual Wunna stuff. In the usual Wunna way. Dressed in House of CB. And with a smile…

The babies came home at around 7.30am! I know!! Like i said, my mum is great at an early drop off and as they went off to play with ‘Daddy,’after a morning with Mama… i recovered with Bloody Mary’s happily…with a glow in my heart and a glint in my eye.

Ended up at The Blacky. (I cannot tell you how much I should dislike that place, after all that has happened to me there. :) Lol.) And well, i was really happy. REALLY happy. Then a moment happened…

Now moments can be good and moments can be bad and moments can be moments that you pray will last forever.

But today…a moment happened…and one that altered my mindset almost with a *click* and because it was a moment that sort of made me feel empty in a second. (Aren’t they awful. Lol.)

I’m a good girl, cleverly disguised as a vixen. I’m a serious love bunny, cleverly disguised as a chick who can take anything that Cupid throws at her. I’m this girl, that randomly was blessed with this amazing life, with these amazing children…and one that is lucky enough to no matter what see the good in everyone, anything with a whole heart.

I’m probably one the best people anyone could have on their side.

But more than anything…i’m honest. I’m loyal. And i’d never ever do anything that i think could or would potentially hurt someone in any way really. I’m a bit silly like that and thought it always worked for me, with a ‘good things happen to good people,’ cliche waving above me with my fingers crossed and my little kitten heart whole.

But a moment happened…and one that I sort of saw with my own little eyes…and i guess the moment wouldn’t seem that big, as i’ve been blessed to have such wonderful moments in my life…with a bundle load of bad, that as always made me stronger, because i’ve never ever let them get to me.

Today, I let stuff get to me and i hate myself for it…and it just makes me like every other girl, every other human…every other being with feelings or some kind of…well i don’t know.

I thought i was completely okay, yet i’m never one who can hide an emotion. I’m expressive. So i’ll laugh the loudest, dance the hardest, yet if i’m uncomfortable or if i kinda feel hurt…you can see straight through me, even behind the kitten glow.

AGAIN, i wasn’t even mad…which annoys me more than anything…i was just…i don’t even know how to put it…

But i knew i wasn’t okay because I walked myself to my car, almost in a blur, one of those blurs where everything around you just seems to pause and there’s just you…doing life..sort of on your own.

I got into my car…and started it up…and as i reversed out, turned my car around and began to drive…the radio was pushed on…and i cried.

I cried  on my drive home, like an idiot…to this…and i felt broken over nothing…what is wrong with me…

Am i really that lame….

Aren’t we all.

Have i really been that silly?

Aren’t we all. :)

So in life, you’ll have moments…sometimes they’ll be good and sometimes they’ll be bad…but more than often than not…you’ll be okay in the end.

I need another moment, where I just feel loved. I need a cuddle and to have someone assure me that everything really is going to be okay. I need to be able to glow and feel that i’m not as foolish foolish can be. :)

Love you lots,

Wunna

 

 

 

Teddy OUT of COT

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Goshy! I am stressed out, pissed off and properly thrown le teddy out of it’s glitzy diamante COT! Like I said, i’ve got a lot on my plate right now and i’ve spent the entire week working hard at it, letting things pile ontop of me and feeling challenged. Even though i’m good at a challenge, i’m not one to enjoy them, or one to thrive off them, as i much more prefer something that comes extremely easily to me…falls on my lap, works with a wink or a press of a button…and who wouldn’t? It’s like when people moan because a being always wants to try and get their own way? Why wouldn’t they? I mean, who doesn’t want to do things their own way? Who literally sits there and thinks, ‘i know, i’m gonna do everything i don’t want to do in life and make sure i deliver it everyone else’s way but mine.’ Makes no sense. Has no gusto. But a lot of people are like that.

Anyway, so i stayed up all night to get caught up on my work. I tried to catch up on blogs, and did all my eyelash sample requests for the next range, sent appropriate emails, picked through designs, read through competition entries and well hit every time zone i needed to.

I’d been stressed out all day and i kinda ‘peaced out’ a bit, as the night ended with a chill and a vino, when the babies went to bed. Plus, i had felt like i had accomplished a little bundle. So typically, it kinda placed me on top of the world, with a happy sigh of relief.

This morning I woke up happy. I was excited about life. I was filled to the brim with ‘ooh laa.’ I felt giddy. I felt happy. I felt like i was positively moving forward. ‘Little Mix’ got whopped on and I even had a baby sized, naked boogie. (Note: I don’t have curtains in my house.)

Then out of nowhere, drama occured. Tiny drama, but enough to annoy me, because when you’re sort of plate spinning and juggling all sorts, with pressure and deadlines and just panicking because you’re so worried that you won’t get it all done or get it all to work out…it sort of builds up over the week and gets to you. So the smallest things can make you *pop,* it sort of depends on how emotional you’re feeling. But i was over the moon. I was even excited to go out and have some fun because i needed to..to release tension and celebrate the work that i had managed to accomplish.

What i don’t need right now is drama and more stress. I mean where is all the good news and handfuls of support? Where is all the fun and the light hearted ‘make me smile’ banter. No one ever sort of cheerleads ME on at all…because i’m just super well equipped i guess, to do it myself? And don’t get me wrong. I am…bit there are times when i might need a casual *boost.*

LIKE NOW. HAHAHAA.

Anyway, i got really annoyed, which sort of made me fuming and then what made it worst was the fact that i realised that I wasn’t even angry and wasn’t even fuming and simply just upset…and i finally did it….i HAD MY CRY!!! Fair enough, I didn’t let it be a big one because all my makeup would’ve run down my face and i would’ve looked liked a drag queen’s mosh pit? Yet it was there and well, i haven’t been able to cry in ages. Mainly because i’ve been so happy that i didn’t need to…yet i know that there have been odd moments where i wanted to, but my kitten soul just couldn’t let a weep release. Which is bad, when you’re an emotional girl.

So basically, I feel like i’m under a lot of pressure and instead of people helping me, i’m getting bollocked by lots of different people, from all different angles…when i just need a hugh five, a hug, a bit of love and a fucking bit of support. I mean GOD. If there’s anyone who needs a positive little life bump…i’m literally the FIRST PERSON, to put myself out there, and go as afr as I can or need to, inorder to make them happy. People don’t do that for me, because i’m DIVA Miss..handle anything Wunna. Which is fine, because I AM. But now i’m watching, well  kinda observing and seeing who the actually soldiers are in Wunna land? I mean what are people even investing into Wunna land?

But i’m on a high and i’m happy. Just emotional and feeling like i’m on my own. (But with great hair.)

I feel empowered, because i always do and i’m tired of people stressing me out, because i’m worth more than that and I do a lot for people. I mean, i saw the big friendly giant, who i’m obsessed with at work the other day. He’s about 7 ft tall, old and quiet. He eats a full breakfast with ‘double everything’ and he couldn’t be more loving, giving, or kind. He appreciated everything and everyone and gives. I mean, he was the guy that came in and left money for the table next to him at the front counter, because they were children with learning disabilities, who maybe couldn’t afford all the cake they wanted. He tipped me loads for nothing, but he smiled at me and told me that my ‘smiley disposition’ was beautiful. And that was kinds.

I’m tired of boy banter. I’m tired of dickheads. Where are the good people, who just express how they feel lovingly and offer you nothing but support, a bit of love and well extra tips. :)

Hope you all have a wonderful August 1st! I’m from Yorkshire, so if anything,

HAPPY HAPPY YORKSHIRE DAY!!!

XXX

Ps/ Rant over. I’m fine now!

PPs/ The lads night blog to come…

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Hanging…over….

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Soooo. the next morning, my Mum drops Ruby off at 9am. :) Grandma’s are good like that. Lol. However, i didn’t at all mind, as being Mummy is my favourite and well i was utterly grateful that my Mum tended to ‘Grandma’ night, so I could do this birthday celebration thingy. PLUS, i find it comforting to get snapped back to reality by the babies, as when you’re a Mama and all mum’s do this, you’re dying for a night out, a blow out, a bit of ‘you’ time or fun. yet when you have it, you soon MiSS the babies like crazy and need them back by your side.

Ruby was happy as can be and well Ben was going through his three phases of hangover. I’m an early bird so i went through them much earlier. It’s the process of waking up and knowing you’re still pissed, meaning that to go back to sleep. Then waking up again, but feeling really hungover and rough, that you NEED to sleep it off some more and then waking up the third time, and just dealing with the fact that your day has now begun and that well you just have to get on with it don’t you. :)

Cuddled Rubes for a bit. Lounged around in bed. She told me all about HER evening. She liked Ben anyway, so seeing him rough wasn’t too much of an issue for Rubes. I was starving. Ben was still asleep. Cbeebies was on in the background and well, I actually by this time felt fresh as a daisy…However…he felt like..

…this.

He literally thought he had only been asleep for about 20 minutes. So every half hour, i took a selfie…

….

….

You get the picture.

When he finally woke up, the first thing that came out of his mouth was that he wanted steak.

Rich was across town in Ponte…needing food immediately, patiently waiting for ‘the grizzly’ to wake up, to the point where he thought it would just be easier to message me, in order to sort out a foody plan.

How right he was…

10 minutes later, we’re in the car, Ruby in tow, picking Rich up and driving to The Carleton, for food, ‘hair of the dog’ and recovery.

I think we were all still a bit hyped from the evening before because we couldn’t stop talking about how great a time we had. Saying that it was actually only hours ago…so it kinda still felt ‘buzzing.’ Ben was really impressed with  Rich because he had made the effort to get along with all his old school friends etc…and it kinda meant  alot to him.

Anyway…

Rubes settled in nicely and go on with it all. (She had mocktails.) Then after food, Reuben, Ramona, and Rich’s sister Beci joined us and before you know it it was bouncy castles, crisps and hangovers.

Everything was fine for ages, until you sort of saw that point where people were hitting their peak. Ben started to look KNACKERED and needed sleep. I was exhausted and looking after Ruby. Wardy had joined us, with his mate who was dressed as a King. (He was surprise showing up at some party, that no one knew he was going to..dressed as a king….and then going to a strip joint?’

That was it for us…

We all went home.

Well Rich went to Reuben’s to play with fire. I took Ruby home. Ben went home to nap and return to the playing field. And well i was done. I went to bed with the babies at 8pm and would’ve gone to bed earlier if i could. Tiredness hit me all at once.

Plus, the weather had changed and it had gotten really windy and cold. When that happens, you just need comfort, junk food and love.

That was Saturday.

I nursed Ben’s birthday hangover back to normality. I took care of myself and Ruby and reminisced with Rich.

Done!

Sunday…Ben had text to see if i wanted to hang out for one in the day. So i met him in town with Junior and we went to The Tap for one. He actually met Pete that day, as we did a Ruby ‘pass’ all at the same time. Went really easy to be honest. In fact it was lovely at The Tap, as we felt all peaceful and calm and sort of like on some other kind of mode? I can’t explain it. But it felt good. Plus, these were the first times that Ben had actually been properly around the loin fruit..and see me as Mum, so i obviously must trust him as I hardly ever let anyone creep into Wunna land.

Anyway, we only stayed for one, then Baby Junior conked out and well this absolutely INSANE Lads night at mine happened, after he called Nick and Dodge to inform them that drinks and Pizza were going to be occuring at mine.

It actually went mental! Especially for an unplanned, Sunday beverage.

To be continued…

(As if i’ve almost caught up!!! HAHAHA)

Ben’s Birthday Bonanza *Leeds*

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Leeds was AWESOME!

Okay, so at exactly this time last week, I was partying in Leeds to celebrate Ben’s actual 28th birthday. Rich, Dodge, Ben and I had agreed to venture off to play ‘drinkies’ in the name of ‘birthday’ in Leeds, with some of Ben’s old school friends, (it was Mark’s birthday also) simply to celebrate Ben being another year older.

I had worked all day. I was in a total mood because I was getting my period, I had had a brief narky tiff the evening before…and it was raining.

I sort of rushed home as fast as I could when I knew the boys were waiting for me at The Blacky in Pontefract…, got ready in about 20 mins and taxied my way straight there in what felt like a moments notice, in my House of CB, previosuly known as Celeboutique, keyhole, ‘Peekaboob’ porny party dress. (The one i wore to Kooky VIP, which i named the ‘twat dress’ as it attracts twats and well had my nipples showing whenever it fancies. It’s an upside down cleavage dress and well…it’s hot…in a slutty McSlut kinda way. Yipppeee!)

I got to The Blacky. The boys were there already drinking. Both seemed happy, both seemed happy that I was there…both loved my ‘peekaboob’ dress…and that was even with my giant parker on, which i felt i needed in Pontefract, simply because people act like they’ve never seen a peekaboob cleavage before, without the parker hiding it all.

Had a few drinks. Dodge arrived fashionably late. I felt like Ben thought that I’d no show, but I’d never do that on his actual birthday, which made it all pretty exciting anyway.

The boys had decided to taxi it into Leeds, which was a better idea than the train and BOOM, we were off…and well straight away Rich and Dodge were like naughty school boys at the back of the bus…until I got switched with Rich and I became ‘naughty school’ kid with Dodge, if naughty is, not knowing my nipples are popping out, shouting and singing ‘Little Mix..Black Magic’ repeatedly and tormenting Ben who was responsibly sat at in the front of the minibussy, van taxi thingy.

Got to Leeds, went on a mission to find his friends, within minutes my LEGS KILLED. I mean how far do you actually have to walk in Leeds to get to a fucking bar. It kills our calves in diamantee heels…like literally, it’s a work out. But I did it and i loved it and we finally go to ‘Sela’ to meet Ben’s old school mates and the other birthday, birthday boy.

Ben went off and did his meet and greets, Rich chatted to newbies and I drank with Dodge, who was managing a quiff and watching my nipples, to make sure they weren’t popping out.

Sela’s, quite chilled, red light and moody, with a twist of fun….so it was a good start off for us, even though men try to wrestle with you, when you go upstairs onto the street. Chatting, chatting, ‘Sheriff’ badges and chatting with booze occurred…and then before you know it, it seemed people were ready to move it along and get to celebrating somewhere else, to find their bit of gusto and continue to do birthday merriment.

I had done wine by then, so i wasn’t in so much of a mood anymore and well once my body knew that I was no longer at work and i could relax, it was okay again. Rushing out is also awful, but at the same time exciting, or you wouldn’t be rushing in the first place. However, the boys were definitely more pissed than I was at this point and I could tell. yet if you’re not pissed at a birthday, then you’ve really got no hope at all.

Now, I know Leeds quite well and i’ve partied it hundreds of times, but i had never been to any of the bars that we went to, which made it all the more fun. As I usually do the poshy bits…with suit boys…which although I love, can get quite dull when you’re in your Peekaboob dress. *Giggle, wiggle.*

Rich was dying to go to Belgrave to get a bit of music going to liven up the shindig a little…so we did and it was awesome. We did rummy drinks and all sorts, on the rooftop, sort of looking out onto Leeds, in a garden type atmosphere, surrounded by what felt like hundreds of people, under the night stars.

At the Belgrave, they have these sheds…comfy sheds..that you can lounge in that look all VIPey, which mean I needed to be in one now. Banter, chitter, chatter occured. The boys left me to do wee’s and so stranger chatted me up. The stranger left the seats outside a shed, so we shimmied onto his table, for a whole lot of booze, laughter and birthday fun. (My drinks still hadn’t kicked in yet…but i was already feeling a good time, so i was all dandy. Plus, Ben looked pretty happy with himself…apart from when he panicked and ordered the wrong drinks or something on the rooftop. However, when that’s your only problem… and when it’s your birthday, life is pretty good.)

Rich was still chatting away, Ben went to drink behind a tree by himself and as soon as I saw an opening BOOM, Dodge and I were IN THE A FUCKING SHED! Bliss! Magic. Comfort zone. Pillows, loungey, comfort with rum…and I apparently had my boobs fully out without even knowing.  HAHAH. Dodge didn’t seem to care as we were talking life, love and ‘Lads corner.’ Yet all these people, well the people i knew kept looking at me and pissing themselves…because i was sat with both nipples out fully unaware. Yet, when you’ve previously been a Glamour Model in life…you kinda become immune to having a nip out in public. Infact that night, I had NEVER EVER had sooo many boys (well again..the ones I knew) pull my dress and rearrange it, in order to tuck my boobs BACK IN! When boys are tucking you boobies IN, because they’ve seen your nipples so much that it’s boring…and they turn motherly..you know you have a problem.

Drinking occurred, under the stars, on a rooftop and in the shed…In fact I remember banning Ben from coming in our shed, by simply placing my diamante heeled stiletto in his way with a ‘NOOOOOO DUDE.’

Now, I don’t know what kept happening, apart from time flying, because as soon as I had gotten comfy…and I had been talking to Dodge loads about all sorts…you’d see one member of the group beckoning everyone out and to the next joint to move along the celebrations.

I lvoe a good time. We all seemed pretty chuffed and a bit more drunk. We headed out onto the Leeds city streets and ended up at some Kareoke bar that no one can remember the name to? I hav no clue? Nobody had a clue. But one of Ben’s old besties is a really good singer or something, so as soon as singing could happen..it was embraced.

I loved it. It was quite laddy…but fun. I even pulled a girl in the loos, who kept holding my hands and forcing to walk me up the stairs. Now, this was the odd part of the night, that i always call the turning point. Up until this point everyone had had normal tipsy fun. The boys were flirty, the girls were drinking…friends were ‘clicking’ off into groups but i did notice that everyone was now really really drunky! I mean, I was talking to some of Ben’s friends and (the handsy one hahaha) and well…he looked and sounded pretty pissed ot me. I even felt drunk, but i’m a happy drunk, so when i am…alls Wunnaful.

Then everyone went off to do their own thing for a bit. Ben wanted a burger, so ventured off with a girl in the group to find food. Rich wanted a cash machine and ventured off into the night streets to find food and some money. BOTH PARTIES WERE GONE FOR WHAT SEEMED LIKE EVER!

Dodge was getting bored. I was getting hit on. So in the end we ventured to the bar, did four tequila shots and on this command, ‘lets just fuck off’…went to Mojo’s to buy really really really strong cocktails…because everyone we knew had disappeared.

Mojo’s was actually really good fun. they were kinda packed and sort of closing? Yet what Dodge realised really quickly is that the ‘peekaboob’ dress can GET YOU IN ANYWHERE AND WITHOUT HAVING TO WAIT. HAHAHA. Nowhere shuts when Peekaboobs are about. They walked us straight in..In fact Dodge even looked at a queue, laughed and said ‘Get us in Wunna.’

Went upstairs ordered two corpse revivals..the strongest drinks ever. I even had to let Dodge drink all mine because it was too strong. Had a bit of a boogie, stand up banter moment…then tinkered back to the Kareoke bar like nothing had happened. Everyone was waiting outside. Ben had had something to eat and RICH…well RICH who had been GONE FOR FUCKING AGES…returned…not with a load of cash or a belly full of food, but with this:

‘Wunna…get this…I found a FERRET!!!’

Yep, he stood in the middle of Leeds, pissed, taking selfies with a ferret that he found of someone…for literally yonks! I mean you should’ve seen his face. It was like he had just won th elottery. He couldn’t have been prouder. I mean the goddamn selfies looked like he had just taken photos with is first born or something???? It was HILARIOUS, so i had to call him a ‘fucking idiot.’

We all went back into the Kareoke bar..

..and there I was all drunky, dancing around, having fun, ditzing about beings…and who gets in my face…BEN!!! (Are you kidding me??? LMFAO)

Now, he wasn’t properly in my face, as he sort of was in my face mildy…but he was well grumpy and thought he was 20 feet tall during this moment of ‘dude ‘tude.’ Like it was dark, someone was on Kareoke, singing shit badly…i’m drunk from Corpse Revivals and Ben’s stood infront of me, at me, with a face like fucking thunder…his arms crossed saying this…

‘HAVE YOU GOT A PROBLEM!!!’

HAHAHAHAHA. It’s funny now, but he was pissed off at the time..for a moment anyway. (Pisshead.)

Right! I’m Wunna. The Ultimate, off the telly, in a peekaboob dress…Glamour puss. :) You don’t talk to me like that and think it’s going to be okay. HAHA. He was all ‘ten men’ at me and i had no clue what he was even on about? So, I just said ‘no,’ ooked puzzled, then looked a bit ditzy, drank my drink and well that was the end of that…he forgave me and got back to being happy again. Lol.

Rich, Ben and I laughed about it the next day…because i was rambling on about how he was all ‘Ponte Massive’ at me. ‘Big Bear Ben.’ Blah..blah..blah…

But yeah, it was all fine, all dandy..and so we moved it along…to Smokestacks.

I’ve actually been to Smokestacks a lot, but it was packed. I can’t even remember the walk there and i’m glad as my calves probably killed. But it was ace as as soon as I got to the bar, three boys were stood there, handed me a tequila shot and told me to down it. Lucky me! Lol. Being a chick rocks. Unfortunately, i forgot that when you let boys do this, they become pests…and i had to deal with them..all three of them hitting on me, in turn…for what seemed like years (I swear I must have aged 42 years in that convo) until Rich did the ‘check i’m alright’ scan, and saved me! Boom! Straight in. Sorted. The beckon for the next bar occurred! I don’t even remember Smokestack. Or any of our group being there? Lol Those boys ruined it for me. I just remember the mixed raced one telling me to ‘come back later..’ so i glamourously smiled, nodded and fuck him off. :) I was on Ben’s birthday. I wasn’t arsed about those dudes.

More walking. More everybody being even more drunk and i’m talking PISSED now…and well we ended up looking like we were going to District, but then found ourselves stood outside and going into this other small bar, that none of us had ever been into before…being guided upstairs in moody lighting…and well HAVING THE ABSOLUTE BEST TIME EVER.

I’m not even kidding, i’m so glad we found this place because it sort of made everyone’s night and sort of made Ben’s birthday complete.

I mean i can’t even tell you how much fun we had. It was AWESOME and i’m a fun girl so for me to tell you that this place was the BEST time ever, means it was absolutely great!

I don’t know what happened but it was like no one else mattered but us, Ben and Marks birthday, and cocktails? I mean, we were swirled into this magical, euphoric state of dark, yet happy simplicity…that was dashed with glitter and good times.

I was really pissed by this point. Ben must have been because he kept buying super expensive cocktails. Rich, who i haven’t seen have SO MUCH fun in ages, was dancing around madly having fucking dance off’s with people and just lost in a swirl of happiness. I liked watching it. It sort of made me happy.

I was dancing around like a lunatic because that what i do and Dodge is like that anyway, so we sexy grinded and danced to all sorts of tunage, laughing our fucking faces off for ages..whilst sipping cocktails, before they got smashed on the floor.

Ben seemed like he was having fun. He was having a dance, getting his ‘chat on..’ and well drinking his body weight in  flowery drinks. HAHA.

I mean i don’t even know how i always had a drink in my hand, but i did and it was apparently because Ben kept buying me them> How bad is that ON HIS BIRTHDAY. But whatever, i bought him drinks too. I mean i never went to the bar and came back without a drink for him. So i’m not evil. :)

The cocktails were amazing. AMAZING. I mean the first one that Ben passed me had actually flowers garnishing it and looked like a dainty fishbowl of beauty. Yummy, strong and caused me to sexy dance…as the boys tucked my nipples back in.

Lots of fun. Lots of cuddles. Just plain old pure happiness and that’s what love, friendship, good times, birthdays and merriment is all about..

..then we looked to our right and Dodge had sat down with the monk on. HAHAHAAH. I don’t know what happened, but the dark side got him and he was not playing anymore. HAHA.

I bought more cocktails…as in our dancy, swirly, birthday world, that was the answer to everything.

We were all up, all having an awesome time, i was being all huggy and lovely..and we before you knew it..it was flipping 3am????

HOW DID THAT HAPPEN?

I felt like we could’ve stayed out forever!! But when you’re outside and you know the time…the time scares you, doesn’t it, so everyone rushed to the nearest kebab shop, ordered food, had that night time banter…(Dodge was cheery now and ordered a whole Donner calzone lol.) Ben got cheesy chips…Rich got these mushroom things…and i just watched because I just CAN’T EAT after consuming that much booze.

Birthday bye’s were said and by 3.30am, Dodge, Rich, Ben and I were in a taxi back to Pontefract. The back seat smelt like donner meat. Rich was chatting about the ‘good time.’ Ben was obviously terrifed of spinning out because he apparently doesn’t travel well after booze in a vehicle. LOL. He had his window down and my window down like it was some gale force, trip to Oz.

Got to Pontefract. The taxi dropped us off where we began. Dodge had a Calzone so immediately walked home. Rich ventured off and Ben and I went to mine, simply because he knew that he’d wake up rough. I knew that he’d wake up rough…and therefore…’nursing his hungoverness’ was going to be my Saturday.

We got home at 4.30am. His birthday was officially over. We smelt the Pontefract air. Heard fights coming out of ‘Biggies’ and smiled. Turning 28…done!

Infact, I felt really good, because I was actually with him the evening/morning, when he turned 28 by one minute…because we went out for drinks…Then i went to work inbetween…and saw him out right up until his last ‘birthday minute…before he passed out and waved by to 27.

Awesome night.

Just absolutely loved it and that’s what making memories are about…

So to anyone that doesn’t celebrate their birthday, the day you were actually born…YOU SHOULD!

It was amazing!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just can’t sleep

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It’s late. My body is exhausted, but i can’t for the life of me sleep. Argh! I’m still stressed because i just can’t seem to relax. I’m doing that ‘lie awake in bed thing’ and my stress rash is coming back! Hurrah!! If i could just find my ‘chill’ place…something that comforts my soul, i’ll be okay again…Yet i’ve had two very good and very busy last two days at work, (I’ve been a target smashing machine,) which on top of everything else has kept my mind ‘busy.’ I want to relax and need to, as i’m being completely aggro to others for no other reason, other than releasing tension. I can’t even do a cry and when you can’t do that, it also means that you’ve closed yourself off emotionally…for a bit anyhow and that’s really odd because i’m a highly emotional being. :) (Not infront of you though. Lol)

Ruby’s stormed off and demanded to stay at her Grandma’s as she’ sure that my Mum won’t make her go to bed?? So, i’ve tucked Junior into my bed, simply so I can spoon him and feel loved. HAHAHA. That’s how sad i am. But i love it because I can do that stare at him while he’s sleeping thing. *Bliss…Bliss…Bliss.* He’s the littlest Wunna of us all, so pretty much gets babied… big time.

I’m behind on my blogs, but i’m gonna catch up. My nexy blog was meant to be all about Ben’s birthday in Leeds, because we all had such an amazing time…yet once i got home, I had babies to tend to and life etc etc…. and well it tired me out, meaning that I couldn’t find the correct mind set to just write a fun blog. And it has to be fun because it was all sooooo sooo fun!  However, it’s coming..tomorrow  (Friday, depending on when you’re reading this) and it’ll be a big one and to be honest it will be exactly one week since the affair, that it will kinda make it cool. (I can’t believe Ben’s Leeds do was a week ago already. Time really does fly!!!!)

Tomorrow (Friday) is my last day of the working week. It’s also payday, which I believe, be you rich or be you poor, it’s always a day that we all appreciate! I’m resting tomorrow and then probably out Saturday, if I can. But yes. i’ve got a lot on…to the point where i’m finding things to distract me, just to make sure that i refrain from losing the plot. Yippppeee! (I totally did or redid, my Bucket List today online, simply to find something frivolous to tend to. Blogging from The Bridge was actually pretty peaceful yesterday and rocked because I got to meet Ben and Rich for drinks afterward. Rich was actually really funny lol last night. There was also, ‘Wheelchair Dave’…who ended up doing a sick, after being left with me for 10 minutes and this girl called ‘Jess.’ Plus her two brothers. All very different to Me, all decent people…yet it turned a bit negative in the end Lol, to the point where Ben and I were just looking at each other, sat on the sofa, doing laughing eyes and sort of shaking our heads at life. It all started well because there was talk about tractor porn and superhero’s…than as they seemed to get drunker, it all started going tits up! HAHAHA. I mean there was even fucking tears! HAHAH)

I drove Ben home, after cheesy chips and was narky with him at the end of the ride. I hate it when i’m narky with people, because it goes against everything that I am or stand for. However, in life you’ve just got to trust that the people who adore you, adore you anyhow and can take a spoonful of forgiveness with a wink, smile and a ‘it’s all okay…bitch,’ It usually is, however, it doesn’t stop me from feeling bad. I actually felt bad all day because of it. I have no clue why? But I did. So, I did what any Glamour Puss would do…and didn’t eat carbs to punish myself. NOT! :) I simply text him a ‘sorry’ because at least then I could redeem myself mildly and i knew that he’d forgive me because well…i’d always forgive him. Innit. Plus, who the fuck would by him cheesy chips. :)

I’m sat on my sofa. I can’t sleep. I have a free weekend. I’ve swapped days with Keiran tomorrow, simply so I can have the children near me, as I’ll not be going out.

I’ve noticed loads over the last couple days in people and well…now that I’m old, and look back upon the young, or even some that are edging into ‘oldie’ with me…happiness and love is all that people need. The young are never quite as grateful for the things that they have, and everyone really should be because i know from my life that ANYTHING COULD HAPPEN, AT ANY POINT, be it good or bad…and sometimes something that you thought would be there forever, may not etc…That’s why you have to embrace every inch of life and fill it with aceness and you have to notice who you have around you , as they’ll obviously be the folk who genuinely adore you and who quite blatantly the folk who don’t. You can kinda notice by  simply observing as it’s never really about what people say and always really about what people do. Right?

Like a status that I saw today, I’ve fed mouths that have slagged me off and wiped tears off the faces that have caused me to weep. I’ve picked people up, who have tried to knock me down and i’ve done favours for people, where there has genuinely been nothing in it for me. But i’m always really really aware of you I have close to me and who I don’t because i can see through anything and i don’t even know how? But i do all that merrily because that’s just ME and if anything it kinda makes me happy because I really don’t know another kitten even half as strong and I do mean emotionally, as I couldn’t lift a bag of feathers if i tried. :) *Wiggle…wink*

I just need to relax, be around love and once I do, everything will be okay again. The stress button will be relieved and work will go on as normal. HAHA. (Yes, i’m being dramatic.)

I’ll also tell you that there’s NUTS everywhere, and i couldn’t be more annoyed!!!! I’m allergic to nuts and LORD you don’t even want to see what happened the last time i ate them. YET, i’m annoyed because I love them and all around me, all i can see is Peanut M & M’s…fricking Snickers….all sorts of nutty delights, that don’t end up in a willy spurt.

Ps/ I’m glad you’re all sending in pictures of your boyfriends etc…to enter my Chrissie Wunna Lash competition. :) I still have to blog about that also. But it’s making that side of my work, so much fun!

I love you lots. I’m doing well. I’m happy. And well you should all do a Bucket List too….

See ya!

Wunna x

 

 

 

 

Tinder off, Boys and Panic Buttons.

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Dear Glamour Pusses! I am sooo sorry for for not blogging sooner, but i’ve been busy and i’ve hit *panic* button, with a big glitzy, kitten fist *thud.* I feel as though i have SO much on and i can’t get my head around it all, with ease. If this was a dance off, i’ve totally have it down, yet it’s not, is it? It’s real life, ‘trying to do well’ work stuff…which always makes me panic and I guess it makes me panic because I want it all to do well, which makes me feel as though failure terrifies me. However, it DOESN’T…as i’m used to picking up the pieces a hundred times over and it takes a lot of that to execute things appropriately in the end. I know that. I get that. I’m excited for my future, because it’s all going so well…but holy shit does it make me panic!!! I’m not good during times like this, as i surrender to the work load and sort of just start to spin out with my eyes shut, my fingers cross and maybe need a Princess stress weep. :) Yipeee!

I’m stressed. I have the new launch of my lash line to develop. I’m sorting out the new samples, sorting through potential models, doing the packaging, running the rest of the lashes, trying to muddle through hiring, firing, working my full time day job, keeping life social and of course the two things that matter….the babies!

It’s actually quite a lot and if i need anything, this little kitty NEEDS HELP. *Waaaa.*

Right, so in the last week, lots has happened. I’ve done meet ups, meetings, work and Ben’s birthday in Leeds. The weather is awful which doesn’t make things easier and i’m behind on all my work, due to a severe lack of time.

I’ve caught up on my sleep and i’m happy. Don’t get me wrong. I couldn’t be happier. But it doesn’t mean that i’m not busy, mentally, physically and emotionally. My mind is on constant tick over but because i know i can do this. Once i chill and feel relaxed…even though i work better under pressure…i’ll be okay. I guess I just want everything to go well and everyone to be happy.

This time last week. I guess, it was almost this time last week. I was sat at The Carleton, with Ben, Nick, and Dodge. I reckon it was Thursday, but i couldn’t really remember, as time and days seems to mess into one. I’d worked all day and Ben had asked me to meet him after for a drink, which i’m always up for. I arrived there…in booty shorts….and the boys were found on some ‘answering questions’ game machine, thingy, at The Carleton entrance, getting shit wrong. :)

We all sat down, Nick ordered a burger. (It was like an anorexics version of ‘Man vs Food.’ He was sort of stuffed on hardly anything, yet acted as though he had just consumed 79 pizzas, in one sitting for the telly. I giggled and wiggle and then Dodge met us, within 20 minutes…and joined us at our table…to enjoy a ‘quiet one’…with brandy.)

Banter, banter, catch ups and delightful chitter occurred. They talked about midgets, with video’s, doing a ‘Booty dance,’ how some friend looked like Michael Jackson, who Dodge felt he needed to inform via Facebook. The usual…talk about cars….Eastenders…chicks..and all things inbetween…then Dodge and Nick felt like a ‘curtain off’ was appropriate, (which is the act of turning your hair into ‘curtains’ for kicks) as I videoed and Ben watched on. Ben was quite subdued. Tom Foolery wasn’t his thing that night. He’s quite balanced, so will only whop out silliness when he feels silly. Nick and Dodge are attention whorey , like moi..so any opportunity that rises, where in which a camera is plonked on and they can perform..they will…and i don’t don’t blame them really. I’m exactly the same. Ben is always really aware of what is going on and will carefully pick his moments. I’m similar to him in the sense that i always know what i’m doing, yet i’m far more of a dickhead and adore a bit of ‘look at me.’ He loves it to, yet is more conscious of what others may think of him. Not  a bad thing really.

Anyway….

THEN, I decided that Nick had totally lost his mojo since ‘Take Me out’ as chicks kept ditching him. (He’s a sensitive soul.) This however, spurred on his inner ego and well, mine also, which made us commit to a ‘Tinder off.’ I even installed the app to beat his ass at this ‘Tinder off’ and well…let’s just say now..I WON. (But ofourse. I mean play me at chess…i’d be shit at that, but don’t play me at trying to make guys like me. :) Amateurs. Lol.)

Anyone, ofcourse you don’t know what a ‘Tinder off’ is because you’re not stupid and infantile like we are. But it is the art of going on Tinder, swiping through your choices, after the word ‘GO’ is shouted and trying to be the FIRST PERSON TO GET A MATCH, with a member of the opposite sex that YOU ACTUALLY FIND ATTRACTIVE.  He even had better choices than I had, as I had a bunch of beer bellied bin men, party boys or strange ones? He had a bunch of average looking chicks…so he could have won this with his eyes closed…and by what he was ‘liking’ he probably did. :) HAHAHA.

I swiped though hundreds in a minute, saw a pic of one guy, who looked a bit more decent than the others, so i liked it..Nick did the same with his chick choices, but at the exact same time,WE BOTH got a match…meaning it had to be best out of three.

We went on, except, he got distracted with messaging them, well…because he’s a guy. I don’t do that, because…i’m ‘Wunna.’ Lol. I just tend not too because boys bite back with me. I mean, this one guy had been messaging me so much that i had to track through the thread to try and figure out why…and well it was because Dodge had once taken my phone and messaged him this:

‘I’ve had a whisky baby and i’m drying up.’ :) FFS

Anyway….

We started again, we ‘matched’ at the EXACT same time three times in a row (even though eh accused me of cheating because one of my choices apparently looked like Phil Mitchel. HAHAH…then BOOM. Last round, he was still swiping away…I did ‘like’…and WAHOOO immediately and before him, waaay before him, it was a ‘MATCH.’

Deal done. Wunna Wins, Nick had lost his mojo. I deleted the app.

Infact we laughed about it afterward because he actually RAN OUT OF LIKES on Tinder and who knew that could even fucking happen!!!! HAHAHAHAHAH. I mean God Knows, how many chicks he’s been ‘liking.’ No wonder he can never find ‘true love’…as spreading yourself thinly never works, i’ve done that, you end up all lonely and puzzled. It’s about noticing who you have in your life, or who has been introduced into your life and is making some kind of magical impact, to the point where you can’t help but fall for them, madly. Innit. If you spread yourself thinly, you’re taking short cuts on the route to love…(not that i’m an expert,) and when you take shortcuts…you fucking get cut short. (Cheesy, but true.)

(I’m currently writing this at The Broken Bridge in Pontefract and men with no teeth or Scottish people, keep hitting on me, like i’m NOT BUSY. I’m trying to take over the world here, not cop off with no teeth fellas.)

Okay, Nick left and Quiz night occured. Ben, Dodge and I accidentally got involved, but were up for it…and we had drank more, so we felt like it was a good idea.

Although he quiz was easier than the hard as hell one at The Tap…we still got most of it wrong and I cheated the whole time, with Google. (Oh shush i don’t care…it’s not like it was important. It’s a fucking pub quiz, not the elections.)

Dodge is up for cheating. Ben IS NOT! HAHAHAHA. Whenever, i wa whispering, ‘It’s Miley Cyrus’…he REFUSED to write it down because he hates cheats! HAHAHAHA.

Long quiz, great night, we still lost, a women even mildy told me off for cheating because her table won. Then we watched all these other people WIN these other lucky star prizes that we weren’t involved in and left.

Dodge walked home. Ben and I chittered chattered a bit, in our favourite creepy woods…which I find soothing now.

Got home, slept…and went to work the next morning!

To be continued….

Ps/ Writing this blog has made me so much happier. HAHAHAH. I simply adore great memories and dollies, i have LOTS!

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Plain Sailing Thursday

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Have we actually made it to Thursday in one piece? If you have..and ofcourse I have, then you have my sincere congratulations, as you have quite cleverly managed to handle the ‘hump’ of the week and sail into your ‘almost weekend’ like a champion! Touche! Wine for everyone!

Well, what i can say about today is that, it seems that even though we’re still only in July, Summer is coming to an end and I know this as people are already trying to ‘couple up.’

Now, i’ve told you my theory a zillion times, about Summer being a time for fun, flings, nothing serious, six packs drinking and holidays, haven’t I!

Well the second phase of that is the ‘now it’s almost Autumn/Winter’ and you know this as people start to decide they need a girlfriend or boyfriend, ready for the cold, Wintery and somewhat cosy months. Don’t feel bad if this is you, as really it’s human nature. We all love a spoon session with some being who we hope cares about us, as we go into the colder seasons and the fact that my work mates have ALREADY begun the ‘i need love’ talks, assures me that Winter is on it’s way!

I’ve had Danielle moan because she needs a man. I mean, we were washing out teapots, and writing her a pretend ‘lonely hearts’ ad, all at the same time. I’ve had Adam…eat a chargrilled chicken salad..that I actually made him…talk about how he adores a bit of a settle down, with a girl, when it comes to Christmas. It’s all happening…and it totally makes me smile.

I’m kinda lucky, because i have children, meaning regardless Christmas is ace for me! I also have a birthday in the cold seasons, meaning, it’s also fun!

But i’m certainly one who adores a snuggle, a spoon and a lot of cuddly love as we cruise into Autumn…)I mean I know that we’re still very Summery, but the Summer time sadness is approaching and the ‘coupling up’ season is en route. I watch it happen to folk EVERY YEAR and i’ve completely lived for yonks! So choose a jumper, a guy, a girl and a spooning partner and get ready for a bit of love.

I mean it’s also that weird transition time where people think about their Summery love decisions and decide as to whether they made a good choice or not? When the suns out and we’re heated…we do foolish things and like a statement i JUST read on Facebook, there are people who are not together who are utterly in love and people who ARE together, who really aren’t in love at all!

You never want you love life to ever be like that, as you should be coupling up or marrying your best friend, someone who understand you, supports you and adores you anyway. Not some that makes you feel like you need to adjust your step, your move, way of thinking or life. If they are not your dream girl or guy, they are NOT the right soul mate. Simples! And you know this right away because your gut instinct will tell you.

So enjoy what’s left of Summer…I mean, unless you’re going on holiday LIKE ME.. 😉 soon…it’s pretty much dusted and start thinking about and preparing for what lies ahead.

My mum sent me an awesome message two days ago, saying that there are only two days that we cannot so anything about and that’s ‘yesterday’ and ‘tomorrow. So although you are prepping for the future…make sure you’re concentrating on the the moment that matters, which is totally and utterly your present.

 

 

*SURPRISE*

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Great day today! I mean, from the absolute moment that I opened my little kitten eyes, for some reason I felt completely and utterly over the moon, just really happy, at peace with myself and just excited about life! Those kinda days are awesome and to be honest, i’m a happy girl for the majority of the time…yet today I was giddy happy, and that’s what makes life perfect. You should all do things that sort of make you wake up in the morning with smiley eyes…and a soul that radiates a weird kinda of warm, because I hate it when people see a day that they find themselves happy…a luxury. Life isn’t that bad. It’s all about what YOU make of it and if you choosey the right choices and surround yourself around the correct people, love and foundation…you’ll always wake up moderately chipper.

I’ve done the hard part of my life…the rest is all smooth sailing and up to the stars! I feel lucky. In fact that’s probably what made my work day decent. I felt a sense of achievement today, because things were busy and I handled it with laughter, charm, hard work, good people and great fun.

I might not be the squeakiest, cleanest dash of perfect…but i’m me…and being moi, really is delightful. :)

Okay, so yesterday after work and might i add that I am so glad that I can finally blurt it all out..I rushed home, after trying to get kicked out of work early, to get dressed int he nick of time and race to The Carleton, to set up ‘shop’ so to speak, for a surprise birthday gathering that I had arranged for Bestie Ben.

He knew nothing about it and I can’t actually believe no one told him, or let it slip. But i had spent the week, contacting every one i knew, who might know him to meet up on this random Tuesday evening, to surprise Ben and give him a little birthday ‘moment,’ (And we all know that I adore moments.)

It was STRESSFUL. But what i realised is that people are kinda good to me and that he had tons of actual friends, who would want to surprise him on his birthday. I mean it was a simple text or message to EVERYONE individually…and i had no clue who would go, if anyone would go…but immediately as soon as I sent out the ‘i’m throwing a surprise birthday, drinky, gathering for Ben at The Carleton at 7pm, this Tuesday….’pretty much every single person replied within five minutes, with the words, ‘I’m in.’

That says a lot about the people we know and kinda says a lot about him. It kinda made me happy, because everyone had work in the morning, or work that day, or were away, tired and all sorts. But no matter what…they made the effort to turn up, show up, not tell Ben…and be there for the ‘gathering.’ (Plus, it got everyone out and i love that too.)

So, the plan…

Ben had arranged to meet me for steak. I had already previously and days before arranged for Dodge to monitor Ben’s every move on Tuesday, as he was off work and i didn’t want him loitering off somewhere, and not be at his surprise. Dodge had also made sure he was doing ‘pretend steak’ with us both, so he too would be travelling up The Carleton anyway.

As soon as I get out of work, my rings and Ben’s already calling wanting to meet up at The Carleton immediately, whilst i’m trying to get ready, rush over and meet all the people, as they arrived, before he got there. I’m lying to him on the phone, telling him that I was tired from work and needed to get showered and couldn’t meet until 7.30pm. (He didn’t love that idea…but went with it anyway.) However, he then told me that Dodge hadn’t met him yet!!! MY MONITOR!!  Lol. So i panicked and text Dodge, as i was sure Ben would just head to The Carleton anyway and it would ruin everything. I knew he wouldn’t actually go home, as he was meeting ME. I’m a glamour puss…i go well with steak. :) So he’s be there, plus, he’s quite reliable with me, so i always feel as though i can trust that he’s going to be there.

I panic message Dodge, who assures me he’s en route to meet him and states that he will TRY and keep him there…which panicked me even more. HAHA.

By this time, I was already at The Carleton, as Rich, Tomfri, Nick etc…were arriving…on time…and worrying, as i didn’t know fi Dodge was going to be able to do it. I mean, if i sent Rich, he would’ve been able to lie and blag it with his eyes closed and come up with all sorts of rubbish to get him to stay. However, luckily, Dodge sorted it in the end like a champ…and i think lots of brandy helped.

I’ve set up a couple tables, we have wine, prosecco, a couple pitches of cocktails…just little bits. I’ve opened up a tab for people to order on and slowly but surely one by one, everyone started to arrive.

I was stressed by this point and turning into a Nazi. I had banned people from eating or smoking…and all sorts. It was hilarious. By the time it was 7pm, enough people were there, to surprise him. I knew that others were arriving late, which was fine, as they would get there.

Ben actually called my phone AGAIN and TEXTED me, but i was sat having a wine with Tony and Nick, so I just looked down, saw it was him and HAD to ignore it, as i couldn’t have done the whole ‘make up a bunch of lies’ thing again…it would’ve been awful. HAHAH. By this time, Dodge had it under control and well and refused to let him travel to The Carleton until the last minute. We were messaging the entire time.

When everything was ready, i called Ben back and said that i had been calling him like mad, to tell him that I had set off and that i was now already at The Carleton. :) So being super reliable, super hungry Ben, he immediately did the ‘i’m getting in a taxi NOW’ thing..and i rushed around telling everyone he was on his way.

Long story short, we’re all chatting amongst ourselves…and 10 minutes later…i see a taxi pull up with Ben, Dodge, his friend Scott and Goth Charlotte in it. However, we had been allocated seats right by this giant window so we all had to BOB DOWN, like idiots, in the corner of the pub, until he came through the door.

He did…we walked through…we all shouted ‘SURPRISE’ and Ben looked at us all oddly, because he didn’t know what was going on. HAHAH. It was sort of an anti climax, but ace, because now it means i could drink and not be stressed.

After  a*pause* and us telling him what was going on, he smiled, looked cheery and got on with it, as we explained what had been going on.

More than anything he said that he was in shock because no one had ever done anything like that for him before and it was a little overwhelming…which i liked.

We all settled, drank, chilled and enjoyed…as he went around everyone and everyone did the ‘Happy Birthday’ Ben spiel.

He was impressed because he kept doing secret, happy, ‘smiley eyes’ at me…like I had ‘done good.’ Infact, i told him repeatedly that i had done good and he replied with a ‘You have done REALLY GOOD. :)

More peopel showed up, were all jyst talking and drinking really, as it was just a gathering to surprise him, because we’re all going into Leeds on Friday (his actual birthday ) for drinks. I think i just kinda wanted to create a little ‘moment’ for him to remember…so i figured a little ‘with Ponte friends’ surprise would be a good idea…and it was.

After a while, I sat down at the table with him (as he was still doing his secret smiley eyes at me) and i told him to open his cards…

No telling him too much about them…HE DID…and that was when ‘the moment’ happened!!

He was inbetween Luke and I, so it was only us who actually saw ‘the moment’ and saw his little face. He  read both cards..and just looked so overwhelmed that he didn’t even know what to say. But his face said it all…and it was that moment when i knew that i had done good! :) I’m the kinda girl who will go out of her way to sort of try to create some kind of memory for someone that I care about…and I do it because i’m lovely :) ..but mainly because when we’re all old and wrinkly…the moments and memories are have, in our ‘thinkers’ are all we have left. There the great times that not only made you smile, but made you smile because you had someone do something incredible for you…without any reason, rhyme or benefit and just out of love and kindness.

Lots more drinks on the tab, fun, banter with new friends, old friends, chitter chatter, passing hours and Marks and Sparks cake blocks that Jas managed to spell ‘rapey’ with, everyone slowly wished him a happy birthday and slowly dispersed…leaving ‘the fun crew’ to do their do.

The pub was actually closing…and half of the fun crew wanted to go into town…and the others wanted to do anything, but didn’t know what?

I looked at Ben..and although he was super happy, it was kinda a lot for him to take in…and i knew that because i could read his face. He wasn’t off into town. I could tell a mile off and i knew that he would just want some chill time.

So, the rest of the fun crew went into town and ended up doing cocktails and Murga’s and Ben and I went home…well to mine…to have a malibu and pineapple juice and to just chill. He needed to just take it all in, say thank you and do it calmly and privately, I think?

But i like those moments…those moments where we can be with everyone and have so much fun or banter…then we can retreat to our bestie haven…where there’s just us…and everything is calm, emotionally peaceful…and just happy. We’re really happy when we spend time together and simply because our personalities kinda just mesh well. We’re actually holding each other’s hand through life right now and it’s working. It’s great! We’re sort of helping each other along, and i’m learning a lot from him without him even realizing. (And being the egomaniac that I am…i never usually learn anything from anyone. :) )

Long story short…his presents…(that i’m not going to go into yet, as i’ll blog about them later down the line…even though he’s probably now the most envied boy in Pontefract. Everyone we told were just shocked, openly jealous or wanted me to be THEIR BESTIE. LMAO.)

All i’m gonna say is that, if he tries hard, he’ll now be driving…oh and dolls…

WE’RE FLIPPING OFF TO MORROCO!!! (I know, i’m awesome, aren’t I!)

:) :)

‘T’ is for Tuesday

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Happy Tuesday!!!

Okay, today if you do anything you need to evoke your inner Wunna, your inner Glamour puss and just enjoy life. Whether you’re making a moment happen, simply getting through your work day or just chilling…do it with style, a wink and a whole lot of fun.

I’m at work all day, doing my do. I was up all night, not being able to sleep and trying to make gin and tonic in cans ‘nightcap’ me to dream land. But still, i tended to looking at the clock on my phone, whilst realizing that in a few hours I had to be up for work. It’s shitty when that happens, sin’t it! HAHAHA. I tried to get some shut eye, yet instead I sort of laid in bed, all sticky with tan on, glaring up at the ceiling. I love it when i’m useless. :) It suits me because I make useless look great!

Okay, so yes…i’m working all day like I said and then the babies are having a Grandma night, which is their favourite ‘night out’ ever. Once i get off work…i’m headed home to spruce up a little and well Ben text me last night, whilst he was tending to ‘nights,’ to see if i wanted to get some ‘beauty food’ (i believe was the term) after work, with Dodge.

Nothing is better to me than the sound of that, so i’m headed for a quiet bit of ‘dins dins’ with the boys, to close Tuesday with a smile. Hopefully my never drying tan will have dried by then, or i’ll have to roam about like a sticky Bob Monkhouse,…on a budget, without the cheesy grin, yet still an audience.

The awesome thing about Tuesday is that it is much better than Monday. You’ve kicked started your way through the shock of Day one…which eases you up for a bit of Day 2.

I’m not really sure what my Tuesday will bring? But i’m good at turning  a mundane, frivilious ‘anything’ day, into something fun. It’s a simple day that we’re lucky to have…so enjoy it…get on with it…and well if you’re me, work through it.

Life is good…all is well…

Make the most of your work week and do it in heels.

Biggest Kisses Ever…

Chrissie x

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Flashbacks, Tabs & Scruffy Mums

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The work part of today was looooong! The fun part of the day was FUN, yet massively distracting. I mean, if i have better things to organize or have fun with…my heart will be taken by it, to the point where everything else blurs out into the distance. I’m like that with boys, jobs, infact all sorts. I just have a one track mind and when my mind is set on something…that’s it, i’m going for on all four cylinders….it’s MINE. (And when i enter that zone, i am this unstoppable, glittery, thunderbolt of glorious passion, that is dashed in sweet madness and ‘ooh laa.’)

Anyway, the work day was boring because i had nothing to do. I did a lot of other stuff…but gosh my soul was drained today. Hahaha.

If i’m distracted, i just can’t concentrate and start tossing it off. I have a dandy bit (all good) on my mind with the eyelash line going on, that i’m trying to ‘tick box’ the pleas of everyone who may need a bit of Wunna in their life…and well i enjoy it…i don’t mind thepressure…infact, i’m sexy under pressure. However, it does mean the mindless bit of ‘everyday’turns tedious to me. I’m a chick who’s  looking to the stars…and i’m getting there slowly but surely. I just can’t embrace ‘going through the motions’ very well. I’m a lioness, dipped in ‘kitten’ courtesy. It’s passion all the way…so yes,the work part of today was loooooong. Everything about me  is exciting. Even i feel it and don’t know what’s up?? Lol! I’m obviously very loud chatty and emotionally, yet notice that i’m only ever open with emotion if it’s positive and happy. Any negative kind of emotion, be it anger or weepy…is done privately and away from everyone else, in my own time. I am NEVER the girl at the bar, crying over everything and that’s not because i’m strong, it’s just because i’m too emotionally insecure to let you see me weep. HAHAA.

Anyway, yesterday, I was meant to tell you….whilst I was in Doncaster, en route to The Georgian Tea Rooms…I saw this what looked like 11 year old girl, with her scruffy looking, Mum and Dad. Her mum looked like an alchy and her dad seemed quiet and calm. But the mum was rambling on about how she was sick of her daughter following her around all the time and that she needed space, so she was trying to make her go home on a bus all my herself, just so she could….well score some drugs so it seemed.

I was walking by and i had sort of listened to the whole thing, as I spent the majority of their ‘chitter’ behind them. (Being glamourous.)

Now, i can’t stand families like this because it makes me feel for the children more than anything. I’m naturally a giver. I’m naturally caring and loving, even if i play with off with wiggling and winking. So to see how fed up her Mum was with her, and to see her trying to palm her 11 year off on a bus on her own devastated me.

Then as I walked by…i heard the girl say to her mum,

‘You’re my MUM. YOU’RE MEANT TO BE LOOKING AFTER ME. I want you to come with me. NOT SEND ME ON MY OWN on a bus. You’re meant to care for me Mum.’

Awful.. awful..awful….and i mean it was bad enough that she was dressed in a white Homer Simpson tshirt, black Reebok joggers, with a double red stripe down them, trainers and a pink frozen long sleeved top, that she had tied around her waist! That broke my heart before anything. :)

But on a more serious note…and when i’ve stopped being a twat…when i walked passed, with my heart all an aching, i actually stopped and looked back…when i did and when i thought wouldn’t see, she paused and made this CRAZY eye contact with me. It was like he single most heated moment of energy, where in which we both just glared…in a trance….like weirdos..at each other.

She looked me up and down, like i was some glammy, odd,  being of love…and I smiled at her warmly…like she was going to be okay. And just as she smiled back…her scruffy mum…grabbed her arm, started screaming at her for whatever she wanted to yell at her at and just like that our energy got cut off. *Snap.*

It sort of woke me up and i just walked on….but i felt for her.

I mean…when all is going well..the worst thing you can do is let that ‘scruffy mum arm’…whatever your ‘scruffy mum arm’ may represent get the better of you…as it can change everything in your life, within a second. I mean, honestly if her Mum and Dad weren’t there (and this may sound creepy) i probably would have spoken to her, given her some cash, told her she was ‘beautiful’ or even bought her an outfit. I mean, don’t put it passed me. Lol. I’m an idiot like that. I’ve done it lots. In New York, I once invited a homeless guy to my breakfast table and bought him a full breakie, simply because the staff had refused to serve him. A little bit of Wunna charm and he’s sat with me…eating…like a pig might i add…but still… he was happy. Lol.

Now, I don’t know why? But that story has just triggered a flash back of the time i was in LA, with Mike (first hubby), Tyler, Pat, Louise, My cousin Nicola, Timmy, Greg..and well loads of people. WE had all decided to have a night out, after acting class, at The Saddle Ranch, On sunset, because they do giant cocktails in vases, saloon style and you can ride a bucking bronco.

For some reason we ordered LOADS. We drank loads…and well i was really goodie, goodie, ebcause I was under the watchful eye of Mike, who was lovely, yet possessive…as in, if i went to the loo, he would make one of his friends walk with me and wait outside the entrance, until I returned from my wee. HAHAHA. It’s funny because we were just kids. We were 22.

Anyway, someone came up with this right idea that FOR FUN we were all going to run out on our tab (i know, it’s not funny at all…but when boys are drunk they think it is in LA…and we were young.) I got scared that I’d get left, so i had to go with it…This guy from Detroit, Timmy, who had this girlfriend who kept snoring…got the car and had it ready outside the bar, ready for everyone to jump in it. The place was really busy…and one by one we legged it into the car…It all went wrong and we all got scared and i guess me must have all legged it at the same time, because it felt like everyone running towards the car at once….to LOCKED DOORS because Timmy  (worst getaway car ever) forgot to open them, then once he did, we had to squeeze into the car, because it only had two doors…HAHAHA. It was like a Benny Hill scene..but with clothes on.

Basically, it all went tits up and I felt guilty, so Mike and I paid for it all…which we should’ve done in the first place on MY DAD’S credit card, that i was a second user on! HAHAHAHA. (I remember when my dad looked at his statement back in England, he called me asking me what ‘The saddle ranch’ was as he thought i’d taken up horse riding. Lol. Awww!)

Even though that moment was naughty, it kinda doesn’t matter now, because well Mike ended up being a movie star, meaning he could buy The Saddle Ranch if he wanted…and well I could pay that tab easey peasy….like hundreds of times over, with donkies on my back. It’s just a fun stupid moment…that is always better than the time i woke up with a traffic cone taped to my head, or in County jail. :)

Life you life, learn from your mistakes. Be good, but don’t be too good to those who don’t deserve it. If you’re privileged, try not to be a tool. It’s baby steps, i know…but fuck it, being kind is awesome.

Moments make a lifetime worth it.

Both babies have fallen asleep…i’m off to make a home gin. x

Love you,

Wuns

cstv13

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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