Girls, Business and I’m Going on a Date…

Where to begin? Busiest Tuesday ever! But I must secretly love busy, as I watched ‘Fairytale Blond’ fuck Tuesday morning off with a McDonalds breakfast, (she’s had a stressy love life weekend. Not ideally ‘fairytale’, yet it’s all been glossed over with smiles and love. So i’m happy.) I did ‘Marks & Sparks’ lunch with ‘Firmonnell,’ who I just can’t help but love. It’s almost like there’s nothing ‘Firmonnell’ can do, that would ever piss me off, as we have the same warped sense of humour and tap into each other emotional chick zones. I talk to her a lot about life, my secrets, work, boys everything…If there’s a person I gossip to, it’s often ‘Firmonnell’ at any point. Mel…in ‘the cupboard’ when you’re not watching. Fairytale Blond on Snapchat, Shelby openly with office banter and sass, Lynne and Lady Shizzle in the morning and Hustle Barbie when she’s opposite me.

Me: ‘I thought we were all on the same period cycle..but we must not be? Have you had your period yet?’

‘Yeah. A week ago! I’ve come off mine???

Me: ‘But why have you had your period before me. You’ve left me hanging??’

I then  praised the Lord, Gospel Style with ‘Double B.’ We’re said our ‘Amens’ to the world with sass and bad accents! That’s how we chose to spend a good ten minutes of our life. Pretending to be a gospel choir. 🙂

Double B: ‘Fairytale Blond! Just do it. Just take that call and start praising the Good Lord, Jesus and all that other good stuff.’

Instead cookies distracted us.

Y’know, we’re all chicks and we’re all working so hard and dabbling in business this and business that. We’ve all had sort of these amazing weekends because we need those two days in a row to just RELAX and enjoy alcoholics. I mean, ‘Hustle Barbie’ went from a weekend of doing ‘The worm’ and ‘Just for Chrissie *Twerking* videos on snapchat’ to the most conservatively glamorous Monday morning of executive stuff that you could imagine. (She’s just sent me a snap of her stew dumplings, which Hot Alex her boyf ate, so she couldn’t bring me a portion. 🙂 But I love Alex, as he bought her a surprise holiday.)

I want to tell you about Mel and her trip to the gynecologist, LOL…but I don’t know if I can…so I’ll wait on that until tomorrow. Hahahahah! DYING! I love her! She nearly passed out. If she gives me the ‘go ahead’…the story is yours. LOL. Mel is terrifying. But I LOVE HER. We’ve become SO close over the past months. She’s in a love swirl and it’s making her smile. Plus, I admire her for her ‘warrior’ type attitude to all that she is going through. Sometimes it’s not easy being a girl. We just make it look easy. 😉

But yes, it’s a really busy time on Wunna Land and today a dude named James did suggest that he ‘would be my SheWee baby.’ Hahaha! Yes, he sang it to me. 🙂 

Apparently my girl friends and I moan so much about having to walk up three flights of stairs in heels to do a wee, that we should all rethink the idea of having ‘She Wees.’ (If you don’t know what that is, it’s a portable wee penis looking spout that a girl can wee in times of trouble.)

FIRSTLY! I AM CHRISSIE WUNNA, GLAMOUR PUSS EXTRAORDINAIRE AND YOU WOULD HAVE TO GAUGE MY DIAMONDS AND EYES OUT BEFORE I EVER USED A SHE WEE.

But fuck it, let’s give them a bit of promo…It’s better than going in a bush. (I’d rather go in a bush.) And handy if you’re a ‘Festival chick.’ (I’m not a grubby festival chick. 🙂 )

But yes, if you’ve prefer not to wee in someone’ cupped hands…than a She Wee is the answer to all your prayers, Google it.

James offered to BE my ‘She Wee’ today. Lol. AND cupped hands!

Me: ‘Why are you a dickhead?’

Fairytale Blond: ‘What is a She Wee?’

Double B: ‘It’s like a crack pipe for nunnies…’ LOL.

HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE LIFE!

Away from that, I will tell you that on Sunday I decided to go on more dates….

I haven’t dated in ages…I don’t want to be dry when it comes to the art of dating…but i don’t want to just date anyone, who isn’t the right soul fit.

Get it?

Anyway, I recieved this message…from a guy that i’ve been ‘on and off’ chatting to for actually years now. Not constantly…but he popped up again recently.

Before, i wasn’t really in a position to go on a date or feel like a dating…

However, in life, sometimes you just have to say ‘yes’ to more things..Saturday…I’m on a date…In Ipswich.

It’s a Date that my guy friends are more excited about than my chick friends. Aside from Mel and ‘Firmonnel’ who know sport or have husbands who know sport…

I haven’t been on a proper sort of meet up, ‘date’ with a guy, in a long time, where I have felt a ‘swirl.’

I feel a ‘swirl’ going down..

I’m excited for Saturday. He tells me he is also. Banter and chitter chatter is good and i find him ‘sexy’ hot. So we’ll see…At least he’s forward enough to quite cheekily and charmingly ‘have a go.’ That’s hot. We get on well…I like him…I have my ‘swirl’ smile on.

Firmonell: ‘I can tell you’re in a swirl this time!’

So yes, I have a shoot that morning and then i’m headed off to go spend some time with the ‘Mister Mister Football Player.’

I haven’t been on a ‘swirl’ date in ages…

🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

What chu’ know ’bout…..

Stuff you might not know about me…

.  I’m allergic to nuts (No…not those kind. 😉 ) 

.  I’m thirty six and a Sagittarius

. I’m a germaphobe.

. I lose interest when people tell me long winded stories and don’t like it when they don’t hit the ‘bullet points.’ lol

. I’ll slum it with a smile, but much prefer luxury

. I am a trained ballet dancer

. At school I got my ‘Drama’ colours 🙂 

. I hate listening to all my voicemails. They scare me when they come bundling in.

. I love banter. All things funny and all people who humour me.

. I once created an anal vibrator for Ann Summers called ‘The learning curve.’ 🙂 🙂 It sold nationally and was filmed for a TV show that opened to 1.7 million viewers. 🙂

. I’m relaunching ‘Diaries of a Glamour Puss’ the book on my life…and because I didn’t like the first version. 

. Yes…I did used to be a Glamour Model. But I also used to work in a shop, but nobody rambles on about that. Lol. 

. I once had a kitten named ‘Gucci’ and a white long haired chihuahua named ‘Victoria Beckham.’

. This year i’m going to start going on more dates…

. My last snapchat encounter was watching ‘Hustle Barbie’ twerk.

. I was the first oriental girl to grace the front pages of a UK lads mag. 

. I can draw you. 

. I’m really into all things spiritual. I see a psychic often for guidance.

. My current favourite cocktail is a strawberry daiquiri

. I don’t like bad manners

. Romance is my favourite

. I used to live in West Hollywood

. I used to live in Doncaster

. I don’t like giving advice incase my advice guides you down the  wrong path

. I really love Little Mix songs.

. I do hope to marry again

. I once was forced to do a wee in a plastic cup and hand it to a stranger from my car window as I crossed the Mexican Border. I hope they didn’t drink it, as I didn’t tell them it was wee.

. My favourite ‘get me going’ hustle track is the intro to ‘Billie Jean’ by Micheal Jackson. But just the intro…Haha. 

. I once made a Drag Queen piggy back me all the way home. 

. I drive a Mercedes but my favourite car is a powder lemon, convertible VW Beetle. I’d love one. 

. When I don’t wear my face, I look like…Junior. (if you aged him 100 years.)

. I am currently being hailed as the UK’s Carrie Bradshaw, which amazes me, as I grew up being a massive ‘SATC’ fan.

. I’m more creative than I am a business woman.

. This Summer will be awesome.

. I’m starting an Episodic Vlog shortly. 

. I’m more ‘witty’ than I am ‘DIVA.’

. I like people more than dogs. 

. I’m really bad at comforting people appropriately when they are crying infront of me. 🙂 


 

 

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL YOU HOT MAMAS!

Mother’s Day means so much to us in Wunna Land, as ofcourse I am a single mum of two, so I *force* the children to praise me on this with love, laughter and gifts. 🙂 They exceeded themselves this year with the designer clutch that I wanted. Lol. They apparently both smiled and fought there way en route to delivering this gift to me, as Grandmas instructed their path.

Junior: ‘RUBY! DON’T TOUCH HAIR!’

Ruby: ‘Ugh! Junior. Shut up and get this to MUM!!’

Raised so well, I know! 🙂 But whatever, I got the designer clutch that I yearned for. (Thanks Mum 😉 )

And on a more sentimental note, I have THE GREATEST MUM ALIVE. In life, I’ve heard all sorts of stories about people and their mums. Good ones. Bad ones. And i’ve remembered them all. Yet, the reason why I do try to remember them all is to remind myself every moment of every day, how lucky I am to have the most wonderfully loving, supportive, ambitious, gentle, hilarious, feisty, yet total ‘boss it’ mum, as MY MUM. She pretty much created this glamourous ‘beast’ of a unicorn that is ‘Chrissie Wunna.’ I’ve laughed with her, i’ve cried with her, she screamed at me over my bad decisions and high fived me with silent oriental *nods of approval* when i’ve done her proud. The one thing she has NEVER DONE, is EVER leave me emotionally stranded…and I couldn’t thank you enough for that! You & Dad are the reason why I always feel loved.

Ruby & Junior…I couldn’t have done it without you Mama. You made single mummying a breeze.They babies have such great Dads, who are there for them lovingly and always, YET I KNOW that both Pete & Keiran would say CONTINUOUSLY….that we couldn’t have done it without you. THANK YOU. I love you.

See you at lunch this afternoon!

This morning my Mum was at mine house, sat in one of the upstairs rooms and I had Baby Junior walk in with a mini bouquet of fresh hand tied peach roses for her. Then I had Ruby walk into the room with a medium sized bouquet of fresh cut lemon roses for her…and then I walked in, all smiles and with all the charm in the world and presented her with a huge and distinctly glamourous bouquet of fresh lillies. Their aroma swirled through the home. I can even smell them now. But I had to go second, as my brother had decided to wake up at the crack of dawn and slide on in with his card/gift first, to claim the ‘favourite child’ trophy.

I’M A GREAT GIFT GIVER. because I genuinely adore buying gifts for people that I know will surprise them and make them smile. I’m naturally generously and there’s a glow about me whenever I have sent a gift to any human that I adore. I was fine with going second. 🙂 I smashed my flowery entrance. Lol. (Get back in lane Bruv.)

But yes! I hope you’re treating your Mums and I hope if you are a Mum you are being treated or spoiling yourself! 🙂

I’m headed to Ego in Ackworth this afternoon, for Mother’s Day lunch and cocktails, with the family. Both babies did their Mother’s day with me yesterday. they took me out to lunch and spoiled me by tormenting strangers. 🙂 Every Sunday is ‘Daddy day’ in Wunna land, Ruby & Junior will head off to lunch with their fathers!

I’m a single mum,  but I just think it is really important for your children to have the healthiest bond with both parents. If you know us personally, you’ll know that Pete, Keiran and I get on so well, we’re like a family. Both boys will come to me and discuss life problems with laughter. I’ll tell them everything…and it’s a blast watching the kids grow up. We were kids when we had them, so watching us play ‘grown ups’ to these little lives that we created (in hotel rooms Lol) is honestly so rewarding. It’s the biggest BUZZ ever. 🙂 Ruby and Junior are my WORLD.

Okay, I’m off to cocktail!

But I will leave you with this…I got a random phone call yesterday at around 4.30pm from ‘Double D’..

I answer, as I know he wouldn’t be calling me if he wasn’t in some kind of emergency…and this is what I heard…

‘WHAT’S THE CODE!!!!!!!!!!’

‘The code for what?’

‘THE CODE!!! I CAN’T…I DIDN’T…’

‘Oh! LOL. It’s **********’

‘Double D‘ had managed to get himself trapped inside a building with the giant ALARM sounding off and with nothing but PANIC.

Hilarious! He was SHITTING HIMSELF! All I could hear when I answered the phone was FLUSTER and this intense panic in his voice. Lol. Behind him…this CRAZY ALARM background noise, which almost sounded like something from some shitty boys movie. It was all very dramatic. I should’ve hung up for *giggles.* But I didn’t I came to the rescue.

I guess, some Saturdays went better than others…:)

ENJOY THE SUNSHINE! My Summer Song…

 

Popaballs, Vlogs & Songs About…

Sorry for the glittery absence of ‘written word’ from Wunna Land last night. I just needed to swirl in a merry chill, relax and enjoy the art of that good old ‘Friday Feeling.’ I’m Happy! I’m dancing to the kitty beat of my own tunes and well I haven’t really tinkered much on anything ‘social media’ over the last few days, yet only because at times, when you sort of ‘perform’ to an audience constantly, one that you’re growing…You need a moment of ‘just being away’ and firstly so you don’t get a stress rash, which my doll of a darling, chick wiggle ‘Firmonnell’ calls a ‘Dragon Rash.’ Secondly…so you can evaluate life and balance out all that is going on with *can can* kicks. Thirdly, so you can have a red berried wine. Fourthly…so everyone wonders where you are, has a panic and then upon your return you find that your engagements are a bustle 🙂 😉 🙂 I know! I’m EVIL! Mwahaha! (The fourth jiggle is called the ‘fear of loss.’ When people are used to doing, reading, or seeing something or someone habitually and you pull it away…they weirdly need it more because they feel like they’re losing it. 🙂 )

Why am I a bitch with boobies?

*Add Popaballs here.*

Image result for popaball logoImage result for popaball logo

(If you don’t know what Popaballs are you really aren’t living appropriately, as they are MY FAVOURITE little bursting fruit infusion balls, that you glamourously tinker into ANY DRINK, infact even food, to add a fun, sassy, yet extraordinarily juicy madness. They make great cocktail party gifts! The Wunna Babies have them in porridge. I’m a huge traditional ‘Bubble Tea’ fan. Ofcourse I’m a lady of the Orient, so obviously this is such a fresh modern development on one of my traditional faves! Try’em.)

Right where was I?

Okay, lets go. i’ll skim it.

Yesterday I learnt that my chick friends and I aren’t actually dirty ‘filth’ eaters at all. We just like to graze. So if there’s food in front of us…ANY FOOD, we’ll nibble it. The filth drawer turned into a £3 FRUIT BOWL! Well done us! I see waistlines in our futures.

My friend ‘Hustle Barbie’ definitely believes that you can..

‘Tell if a guy has a really big willy by the sound of his voice.’

That 90’s throwback song that goes…‘it’s godda be big’ was playing in the background and it had reminded her of willies…It does though doesn’t it!

So if you have a *piddley* voice, we’ll think your ‘nipper’ squeaks, because we’ve decided that, as women of the world, we can visualize what your ‘man part’ looks like, simply by listening to the tones that sound out of your mouth.

‘Double B’ doesn’t know if..

‘Pear drops are pear flavoured? ‘

Fairytale Blond, ‘Chrissie! Have you heard this, for your blog!!!’

Yet she DOES know!!! She just likes to be stupid in the name of hilarity. Yesterday she was all ‘SASSERILLA,’  & DIVA strutting about the place, armed with no working ears and her resting bitch face.

‘What? I’ve had my hair done. I’ve got hair over BOTH EARS now…I can’t HEAR things AND HAVE HAIR. FOR FUCKS SAKE.’

I also learnt that we girls are weird, yet a delightful species of course. Not all of us are weird. But there’s certainly that tiny little bundle of us, that are tapped. 🙂

When you’re older you’re flattered by boys and attention. yet you’re not in a swirl about the flattery unless you fancy them.

When you’re a young girl, fresh on the emotional track…with bundles of rubbish love life experiences still about to occur, you are CRAZY. I’ve been there. I’m high fiving ya! Lol. (Not really. i think you’re dickheads. 🙂 But yes, the young girls want male interest, yet when they get it, they can’t just LOVE it gracefully…they HAVE TO REFER to the poor guy as a…

‘UGH! GOD! HE’S TOTALLY STALKING ME!!!

Hahahha!

THEN like that’s not enough embarrassment, they further it on, by stretching out how appalling the gent is for even attempting to ask a question of ANY SORT. Lol.

‘What a stalker! Why is he asking that? Stop stalking everyone!’

Hahaha!

We had an incident occur where in which a handsome Sandy Blond male, cautiously strided into our bubble, to query if his ex girlfriend was with us. He had MISTAKEN his ex for ‘Firmonnell.’ (Who wasn’t there at the time and has been married forever with children, to the ‘Big D.’) So the Sandy Blond Handsome just wanted to ask a few questions in general…

OH LORD, have mercy on his soul…I am naturally social and charming… so I’ll be helpful…on any level…and was prepared to be…

But Feisty Gem, who is going through a really difficult time right now, in the love AND life department..TOOK THE REINS and well she currently thinks all men are massive TWATS, as she’s fresh off a bumpy love breakup…Let’s just say she made the executive decision to release her frustration on the Sandy Blond Handsome…

‘HE’S DEFINITELY A F****** STALKER! I’m not telling you where she LIVES!’

Then Double D (don’t get him mixed up with Double B) decided to stick up for ‘the boys’ with words of wisdom , that actually made proper sense…but being girls, we all just looked at him like he shouldn’t be speaking….EVER! LOL.

I like ‘Double D’ because you can say whatever you want to him and he’ll laugh it off. The other boy helper ‘Sellers’ has already been forced of the Island. I liked him too. He should’ve stayed. But life is life and it takes you to places…

I watched Steve Bartlett’s Vlog Last night. I watch it every night at 8pm. No matter where I am. I’m a massive fan and I watched a girl called Amelia Wood (is that her name?) Anyway, she has started her own business, or trying to…she’s still in the ‘hustle struggle’ phases of it all which is an honorable phase, and she showed up, to ask Steve’s advice….as she’s finding the money part hard.

From my experience when it comes to chicks or anyone in business….I think that it is SO important for you focus on the positive parts of the experience…and not on the hardships. The hardships are your ‘pity party.’ And I don’t mean that harshly. I mean it truthfully. The ‘pity paty’ gets you nowhere or drunk.

In life, I’ve been through SUCH A MUCH….I’ve experienced what felt like the poorest existence, where I’ve been literally homeless in New York. Not for long, as I had great LA friends. But what I remember from that time was finding it funny that all I had eaten for the entire day was a shot of coconut rum,that I got for free. Lol. During that time, I STILL waltzed into the business centres of various hotels and wrote my blog on their computers. Hahaha! DAILY! And I loved it! I had nothing! But my blog! That was my life! Yet, I must’ve had some sort of *glow* about me, because THIS RANDOM STRANGER saw me sat in a hotel lobby for hours..To this day, I have no clue who he was…but he was this black guy, rocking his ‘fro out. He was wearing beige, looked really normal. He walked up to me and handed me £200 in cash…and said,

‘You’re too beautiful to be going through whatever you’re going through…’ AND WALKED AWAY!

AS IF!! Yet at the same time i’ve experienced what people view as the WEALTHIEST lifestyle, where I have yachted and jetted and had assistants, upon assistants wait upon me in executive suites that only a Princess would find a bore…

That’s all I can tell you about that particular time, as obviously you can imagine, it was wonderful.

Yet at the same time, i’ve done the two jobs, kids and ‘trying to make it’ bonanza.

Yet during all experiences….I was always laughing. I was always happy. I was always positive and always blogging. I never stressed out. I never worried about money or ‘making it.’ I still went out and had fun and I don’t even know how. 🙂 I just got on with life…Happily…I never felt sorry for myself…I didn’t ask for help, because I wasn’t ready to ask for help back then…YET no matter what advice anyone gives you….The truth behind it all, is that you need to figure it out by yourself and once you do…people will come. They’ll notice you. I promise.

You can make your dreams come true. It happens every minute of every day.

More people help you, when you don’t ask for help…

 

 

Actual Crazy, Hollywood, Amaze Balls…

I am have the most smashing LIFE time EVER! I’m feeling GREAT! I’m sort of just taking a chill from all things too ‘social media,’ yet not for long, as I live and breathe it…I mean a couple of days…However, it’s enough for me to take a second to just get on with the ‘norm’ of my daily work and secretly CELEBRATE. 🙂

Yes! You heard! I am about to head into the most DELICIOUSLY AMAZING APRIL EVER and what i’ve learnt from life, is that before the sexy storm begins, you just have to take a moment and enjoy a victory *wiggle wink.* JUST SAYIN’! And that..I am!

I’m still busy. But i’m beaming.

I can’t tell you much about my April. But I can tell you, that I have some of the most wonderful events coming up, some divine brands ready to be *winked* in Wunnaland AND the UK blog Awards next month, which if you didn’t know…I’m a finalist of. I won’t win it. But i’ll certainly be there. It’s such a great honour and it’s almost one tick on my ‘dreams come true’ list. I’m SO grateful for all the support I have from ym friends and family. I mean, GOD, my Mum is always very..

‘You don’t have to win it, to win in the end…and ya Dad and I KNOW that you win in the end..’

HOW SWEET! How Lucky am I!!

But do also know, that Wunna land is not silly enough to not go, as it will be the greatest networking event ever. I might not win the trophy, but i’ll smash the ‘social’ banter…

More exciting news…*Wait whilst i take off my waist shaper and air throw/ mouth catch a few *Popaballs* (Google them) I start a Vlog shortly…AND IT’S AMAZING. I’m still blogging, as that’s what I do. And it seems i must do it well? Yet now, you will be TREATED to real life episodes of chrissiewunna.com. And Wunna Land is SO fun that you’ll either piddle with laughter or die with shock….which is a ‘stunned’ way of creaming embarrassment.

HOWEVER WAIT! Due to me coming from a Reality TV background, it seems that if I truly wanted I could actually sample my hand at Vlogging, by just skipping it and whipping Wunna land life out on the actual telly. I KNOW! This is where ‘who you knows’ matters! So make you connections But prove yourself. I was obviously years ago on ‘Paris Hiltons British Best Friend’ on ITV2, and one of their focal characters. It s the same people who read a Tweet, where in which I said,

‘Looking for Videographers/Editors’

…who immediately shimmied into my inbox.

I will also so, that hundreds of Videographers filled my inbox…and i’m still going through you all, yet I pretty much know who i’m going to use,

Yet, it’s great. As i’m still doing an episodic vlog and it certainly won’t be lame. 🙂 And I’m feeling so *pumped* about it right now, as one of my LA besties, has just got his movie commissioned and it is currently, this second being produced and filmed….and this is no low budget ‘try out…’ it’s a big ass movie and IT HAS MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY IN IT. He sent me a snap of his ‘Directors Chair’ today. It made me smile. 🙂 He was GIDDY! It’s Matt!

Image may contain: one or more people and people sitting

YET HE TOLD ME THIS…

‘Chrissie…you’ve got it. Don’t let anyone out there make you think that they’re better than you in your niche, because they’re NOT. You’ve got ‘it’ MAJOR, you grew up LA style and the cream always rises to the top. I’ve known you forever, as friends, as…y’know..;) …I read ya blog every day….and something just tells me that you’re on to smashing great things..’

‘Can I be in you next movie dude?’

‘As if you thought you even had to ask. 🙂 ‘

But yes, it may seem that I’m on a chill, yet it’s actually quite the opposite. i’m just celebrating life with the people that I *heart* and on a day to day basis getting my very normal ‘work’ on. *Pout.*

I’ve had some ace conversations today. So ace that now i’ve had nearly a bottle of red wine, I can’t remember them? Here are some snippets…

‘Yeah it’s much sexier if you say your girlfriends from Mauritius and not Hull.’

‘The filth drawers getting empty…’

‘Did you know that the fried eggs from Haribo are actually meant to be UFO’s’

‘Shut up dickhead. They’re fried eggs. That makes no sense, as why would they make UFO’s fried egg coloured.’

‘Just be awful to me Chrissie, I can’t stand it when you’re nice to me. It makes me blush and feel awkward. I’m the youngest of six. I come from a piss take family. We don’t do compliments…’

‘I’m losing the will to live here..’

‘I need a filling!’

‘Are these pear drops apple?’

This year, I am going to smash it…and for the first time in ages, I feel as though i actually know what i’m doing.

For the first time in ages, I actually KNOW that I know what i’m doing and i feel juiced!

So yes, I’m gonna work, cocktail and enjoy life for the rest of this merry March and then….

Oh Dollies…Wunna Land is going to *rev* shit up…and smashed the most glamorous ‘bastards’ out of ya’ll. *Giggles*

Kisses…

Chrissie x

ps/ I’m leaving you with this song, as it is firstly my 3 year old son’s CURRENT FAVORITE SONG and because Maroon  5, used to be my ‘across the balcony’ neighbours. They told me one night, when we were all really pissed, that their band would make it big. 🙂 🙂 🙂 I got trashed on tequila and cried over a boy as the drummer carried me to my apartment….

 

 

 

 

The Filth Drawer

Wunna Land has been infiltrated by ‘young boys.’

Mel: ‘Who are all these young boys?’

Fairytale Blond: ‘They’re not young! They’re 20 something!’

Mel: ‘That’s young to me.’

Right! Incase you were unaware. The ‘day to day’ of my existance, what I label as ‘Wunna land’ is filled with hot, sassy, glamourous girls, ladies and females performing the art of ‘Business.’ The chicks’ rule the roost’ in Wunna Land. We’re dymaic, we’re fun, we’re straight talking, loveable and all on each other’s period cycles. It’s how it IS and how it has been for a while!

OUT OF NOWHERE, Wunna land is now slowly being littered with YOUNG BOYS, which quiffs and suits…who can do Rubix cubes and who have Oriental Girl fetishes…

Double B,’ Well all his girlfriends used to be Oriental…’

Double D: ‘Well one was Chinese, another from the Phillipines and one from….Infact the last one was older tooo!

Me:’ Is that why you’ve been staring at me lovingly all day? Whenever I look at you you’re glaring at me.

Double D: ‘I like how Chrissie was nice to me FOR ONE DAY. Really nice and now she’s a total sassy bitch to me always. It lasted ONE DAY! Lol.

I’ve named the two young boys ‘Sellers’ and ‘Double D’ and firstly because… they both have the same name. (I know! As if we have Boy Helpers and they respond to the exact same forename.) And secondly, ‘Double D‘is related ‘Double B.‘ (I know…what a wacky concept. Double B wore her specs today. She looked all geeky and cute. I followed her down the stairs, this morning, telling her repeatedly, until she told me to ‘fuck off.’

Are you confused yet?

The good thing about having ‘Boy Helpers’ is the simple fact that one of them insists on trying to suck up to us.YES! THE GIRLS! I like him! He’s smart. (Even though he does have an older Oriental girl fetish.)

‘My mum says i’ll either have Oriental or Ginger children?’

I just blanked him, then sneaky smiled with laughter eyes.

I mean GOD, he even made Mel crack a smile this afternoon with a ‘you’ll do alright here,’ seal of approval..and that on it’s OWN is  LIFETIME accomplishment.

He did try and set his Mum on Mel. (Do note that he’s 20 something. 🙂 )

‘Honestly, i’ll bring my Mum in to have a go at you, if you call me that again!’

Mel: ‘I’m not scared of ANYONE’S MUM.’

Lol. I love that Mel can’t just be lovely to the new boy, with his rubbish banter skills. She has to threaten him when she fills threatened. Hahahahah! DYING!

‘I’ll set my Mum on you!’

Yet, jokes aside… All was fair in love and candy!

That boy FILLED OUR ‘FILTH DRAWER’ with a joyous and abundant amount of beautiful jellied, chocolately, minty DELIGHTS to keep us happy and to MAKE SURE that we were lovely to him.

If you follow this blog, you will know what the Filth Drawer is! If you don’t? Search it!

We’re Northern girls. We’re Yorkshire Girls. We’re glamour pusses, but oh my FUCKING GOD, we CANNOT LIVE without our SECRET DRAWER that is FILLED WITH ‘FILTH.’

Firmonnel: ‘I’m on a sugar high. I didn’t even eat lunch today, I just had a hot chocolate and scoffed sweets all day.’

‘Why does this taste gingery?’

I’m a grazer and i’m a MINT CHOMPER. I love any little bits of ‘munch munch’ that I can get my hands on out that filth drawer. But only hard boiled, crunchy bits will suffice. I’ll smash a bag of Marks & Sparks Assorted Mints in a wink. I mean fuck it, we had PEAR DROPS TODAY. How Old School and delightful!

But yes, I love ALL little sweet or savory *chompy* bits. Anything from wasabi peas to ……………………… (I can’t think of anything to put in that blank?) AND if you didn’t know, I constantly chew gum…like it’s my dinner. 🙂

Right, I’m home now and chilling. I fancy a wine and a kick back. I’ve loved being a girl today. We should embrace being female with hair tosses and pouts!

I’m just reading up about today’s crazy Westminster Attack. How terrible! Its shocking, isn’t it! My heart goes out to all those affected by the ‘mayhem.’

It goes to show you that you just NEVER EVER know what’s around the corner.

Enjoy the ‘now‘ of your life…and try not to take everything for granted. We all do. I know I do at times. It’s a shame that it always takes something shocking to happen to ‘wake us up,’ when as humans we should enjoy being ‘awake’ all the time…

 

 

 

Fun, Sasserillas & That Thing Called Life

‘There’s so much SASS in this office today! I’ve honestly gone out to buy a new car and a bunch of new suits simply because it’s all girls and all such a Fashion Show,’

…said the Newest ‘D’ to the little Burmese Glamour Puss, as ‘Firmonnell’ nibbled a warmed chicken fajita and we looked over the town from our glass windowed tower. (I had a pasty. It was really glamourous…honest!)

And tooooooooooooooooo right, Baby Boo! There’s no slumming it, without SASS allowed! Be armed with wit, charm and the best shoe game in town. Then with a *wink,* laugh off the drama and swirl it round with magIco!

‘What does Hasta Manana mean?’

‘Bananas.’

‘You should know Chrissie. Didn’t you have a Mexican Husband once?

‘I didn’t listen though did I! Why have you got a Rubix Cube?’

‘I can do it..’

‘As if! I totally fancy Justin Bieber simply because he can do a Rubix Cube.’

‘Ugh! You should fancy Will Smith. He can do a Rubix Cube.’

‘I do. I fancy them ALL!’

Now, that would be a jolly threesome to consider and I CANNOT THINK of ANYTHING WORSE at my age than the thought of a THREESOME. I’m more of a get married and enjoy a love swirl kinda girl, than I am a ‘messy threesome’ type. Now i’m 30 something. They gross me out. I just couldn’t be bothered, could you? I’d prefer to just hand out the refreshments or something? They’re never very ‘Arabian Nights’ are they? And more just in someones 2 bed apartment, by a washing machine and sofa.

Romance is alive.

Anyway, that wasn’t the point to my blog today.

Today I wanted to expressed how IMPORTANT IT IS TO JUST FUCKING HAVE FUN!

Jesus.

We all work so hard. Work all hours. Chase dreams madly. Stress out about the bullshit that life chucks at us and sometimes you’ve just got to stop the *running/chasing/dashing/stressing* and kick it with four wines, good times, great friends, love and family. Sometimes we just need to forgot about the ‘busy,’ the ‘money being made‘ the drama, the decimal points, the percentages, the targets and do life…LIVE, love with our heart on our sleeves and get lost in a swirl of magic.

I work too hard. Well I think I do? I’ll hit brick walls and climb over them with giggles and that in itself is a great talent.  So I’ll pat myself on the back for that, as I’m going through a really busy time.

Yet, I can work TOO HARD sometimes that I forget to enjoy having fun! AND WHAT COULD BE MORE DULL. What could be more unattractive, right?

Yes, i’ve got goals. Yes, I’m ambitious and driven. Yes, I KNOW that i’ll get there. But the one thing GREAT thing about me, is that I know how to have a good time.  I’m free! I know how to let loose, have fun and ENJOY LIFE. I have a great grasp of what life means to me and what I stand for…

Infact, the one thing that made this blog popular (aside from the telly stint where I tinkered with Paris Hilton and tried to be her best friend for ITV2) was the fact that openly had a blast I did and still do MY life, MY way and without being censored. And that’s real. That’s the good stuff. That’s the first bite of ‘MMmmm’ when you’re scoffing a great meal.

We’re in Spring. We’re headed for Summer…and it’s about time we geared our pretty selves up for a good flipping life!

Have that extra 2 drinks. Dance infront of your mirror naked. Buy that expensive new whip. Laugh out loud. Dip yourself in Luxury. Save for that Mulberry bag. Party the night away. Text that girl or guy you fancy. Chill with friends. Cuddle with your babies. Fall in love. Get ya hair did. Take that trip! Enjoy risks. Love new chapters. Trump out loud. Kiss a few frogs! Lay in if you want to! BE DELICIOUS! Just love whatever it is, that you see as ‘good times.’

We spend too much time stressing about bollocks and dream chasing and all that *panic button* jazz! We obsess over it, don’t we? When really, we forget that’magic’ that glistens from us having those ‘good times’ that gets us where we need to be.

I AM the single most ambitious girl you will ever know. I work hard. Yet, what i’m realizing is that sometimes, you’ve done everything you can in a moment…and once you’ve batted that glitter ball, across your flashy giant ball park, you just have to chill and let someone see it, catch it and realize that you’re wonderful.

So, yes! Make your mark on this world…But oh my GOD, have a blast whilst you do it! It’s that *glow* that makes you sexy!

Right now, I’m no so bothered about an audience, a follow, a ‘like’ a whatever it is? I’m having a great time with my chick friends, all the work that I have a bubbling and my time with my babies…and i’m loving it. I’m not worried about ‘an audience’ as it always always finds me…I feel really confident. I’m set for good things and if i’m not…I’ll live. 🙂 I’m gearing up for fun….and I intend to EMBRACE every single waking minute of it!


 

 

Busy Times & Oriental Wives!

‘You’re quiet Chrissie?’

‘Why are you so quiet today?’

‘She’s just stressed…’

‘No. Lol. I’ve just got a lot of work on, so i’m in the mode and not getting distracted by Tom Foolery. 🙂 ‘

I am currently tinkering in the busiest time that I have EVER experienced It a merry ‘work load’ and all at once. I’m good at being busy. So i’m not phased. I’m happy. I’m positive. But when I am busy, my mind is full, swift and flashing methodically. So I tend to go quiet, focus on the *hush hush* and get through whatever I need to, in my own little Wunna zone. Lol I obviously must be gobbier than I thought? As my quietness was questioned and noticed. 🙂 I didn’t even notice that I was being quiet.

But yes, it’s so busy for me right now, that there isn’t really time for me to enjoy too much of a giggle, throw a ‘pity party’ or bury my head in the sand. Everything needs to get done…So i’m doing it. And even though today was somewhat daunting. Tomorrow, I’ll SMASH IT because that’s what good girls do! *Wiggle…Wink.* Monday is always my ‘figure it out’ day. Tuesday…I’m usually ON IT! So I want you to know that, if you are also experiencing a super ‘fast paced’ dash of life…Be it in work, emotionally or romantically….All you have to do is grow ten feet tall, don’t bother wasting time on the ‘poor little me’ and just knuckle down, organize it all and in the best heels, get to being PRODUCTIVE….FAST! Sort it all out so it works in your favour. You’ll feel so good when you totter over that ‘finish line’ that you might even have a little champion ‘slut drop’ in the name of VICTORY. And we all know that the ‘slut drop’ is the pinnacle point of any worthy dance off.

That’s what ‘slaying it‘ is all about. (Guuuurls!) Shut off, focus on what YOU’RE DOING, forget about whatever everyone else is doing and get it done. It’s as easy as that. Do the things that you constantly put off…and you’ll feel EVEN MORE delicious when you finally get to the tunnel end!

I’M FEEEEEEEEEEEEEELING GOOD!

Away from that, I got in, kissed my Babies with love and swirled in that ‘Happy Mama’ glory. Then whilst pouring a fresh gin and tonic and scrolling through my phone…I accidentally got into the most hilarious banter with two of my LA guy friends.

When I was young and in West Hollywood, I used to date both of them. No. Not at the same time. But, during chapters of my life and not for very long. We were all friends, caught up in the sunkissed LA lifestyle, trying to ‘make it big.’ ANYWAY, and i’ve blogged this before…but BOTH GUYS (who I remember had these stunning hot blond girlfriends, followed by sexy brunette short terms…and…well you get the picture.) Both guys were models/actors and super sweet all at the same time. They’re hot! But everyone is in LA. I mean, it’s a town where you’ll be a dick, poor, a ‘no hoper,’ or challenged, but YOU WILL LOOK GOOD DOING IT. 🙂

They’re much older now, as am I. One is currently happily married and gushing about how much he adores his wife on Instagram and the other (who once SWORE TO ME) that he would never marry until he was 84 and when he did he’d be stonkingly rich and date a 23 year old Playboy bunny. Lol. That was his future.

Both guys….Now that they’re settled….have chosen to do ‘forever’ with smoking hot ORIENTAL CHICKS! YES! Hahaha! We are finally the BEST accessory! Honestly. It’s the newest thing in town! All chicks from the Orient are now your LA wives! I’ve obviously *slapped them * with ‘The Wunna Brush’ that there was no other choice than to pick a chick from Eastern lands, with those little kitten eyes. Lol

I did express that to them!

They pissed themselves text laughing…(they both know each other well) and agreed to state that they certainly picked ‘less annoying’ versions of me. 🙂

‘Less annoying! It was like trying to shake turd off a stick with you guys! 🙂 ‘

‘You took yourself off rotation…’

‘I don’t think I have ever been involved with a girl where so many people decided to be so interested in what was going on! It was madness.’

Then we wished each other well for ‘old times’ sake and I sat back, kicked off my kitten heels and enjoyed the most delicious G & T that a heavy work Monday could’ve ever treated me with.

Life is hectic. But it’s good right now!

I’m focusing on one thing at a time and doing it well. It’s not about the rush. It’s about doing things right…as when you do things appropriately…you’ll make a much better impact long term.

*Wink.*

 

 

 

What a weekend, Secrets & Cougars

I need two extra days added onto my weekend please! It’s just been a ‘runner.’ Once of those ‘smash out of work on a Friday’ shindigs, that has glamourously led me into a weekend of ‘go, go, go.’ Schedules! Meetings! Babies! Madness! I’m shattered. I’ve lost my voice. I’d like Greek ‘Handsomes,’ in Toga’s to massage me back to good health. I’ve dropepd my phone and smashed my screen. (UGH!) AND, I’l tell you that I’ve accidentally got a dandy bit awesome at this whole ‘game of business’ malarky! To be fair, everything’s gone wrong this weekend. So technically, I could’ve just chilled it with Ruby and Junior in my comfies the whole time. Infact ‘wrong’ is the incorrect term. I’ll say it went ‘not as smoothly as it could’ve.’ But that’s because I spend so much time working hard throughout the week, that when it comes to the ‘weekend work,‘ I’m not remotely organised enough for it. I’ve learnt a lot. IN TWO DAYS. Over the next couple of months. I’m going to SMASH IT. *Cue: Beyonce Helicopter Hair Whip* Fuck it! Add *Lambrini shower sprays* to it also!

I’m just gonna skim it all, as I need time to chill, before Monday kicks me in the *hoo haa.*

Saturday was rushy. I did breakfast and shopping with the babies and my mum, as I magically *whirled* through the dash of life, in heels, big hair and whilst snatching last minute ‘needs’ to prep me for the weekend. I had to go pick up the car from Mercedes. I fitted in an important partnership meeting.

Me: ‘So what it is that you want me to help you with?’

Company: ‘*&&)($£”!$$£&**£, so how much?’

Kinda made me feel all powerful for a millisecond!

*Hands were shaken on this.*

Then, I grabbed my Gucci canvas bag and with the wind in my hair *dashed* quickly across town, in my faux fur to Cosmo’s. Where I enjoyed ACTUAL lunch, equipped with a wine drizzle, with my Mum, Dad, Brother, Ruby & Junior. We’re a really close family & it’s great because it makes my world always feel bubbled over with support, trust and that good old unconditional love. I am never emotionally starved or lonely. Wunna land is filled with LIFE. I always remember to *pause* and enjoy those moments with the people I love. Work is work. Even if you love what you do. Yet if your world isn’t balanced, you’ll find, in time that your soul will never be fulfilled. I ‘smell the roses’ and I smell’em good! 😉

Then I had to rush off, grab an outfit, constantly clock watch, as I treated The Wunna Babies to anything their hearts desired, make phone calls,  organise train times and get home as soon as I could. IN MINUTES, I  showered, tanned, did my hair, face and *pout.* I slipped on the tight gold pencil dress, quickly but delicately buckled on my rhinestone Gina Shoes (the ones that Paris Hilton gave me for getting naked. The poor sods have been dashed through life like glistening, burlesquesy….Wunna land…slaves.)

Kissed everyone ‘Goodbye,’ skipped into a waiting car, flung myself to the train station to get on the next ‘choo choo’ to Leeds for 7.30m, for my 8pm Business meeting, at ‘Mumtaz’ Leeds.

It kinda all went wrong from that point on…

I was texting through my journey, fully done up in a casual corner train seat, listening to the guy infront of me, tell the guy infront of him that he was..

‘Off to an Engagement party…’

‘Oh? I’m off to see some bird. Been talking to her for 2 weeks..’

Abeiku Arthur (who owns the High Fashion magazine ‘House of Solo‘ that I AM CURRENTLY IN) had messaged me, as he had two contributor meetings in Leeds also. We’re really good friends..really good friends and we always piss ourselves at life, our own businesses and at the same time wind each other up playfully, with our natural competitiveness. I WIN EVERYTHING!

The Leeds Skyline draws in, it’s now night and the sky is littered with stars, around me there is a bustle if excitement. I took the fun train to Leeds. That train where everyone is dressed up and ready for a night of cocktailing around the city. The boys with their shirted entourages, the girls in their heels and tight dressed winks.

I looked glamourous, BUT I had business to tend to…

Yet! OH WHAT DRAMA.

Right before I met this person, I was to print off a ‘non disclosure’ form, sign it and bring it to my meeting, to make sure that nothing discussed DURING the meeting was repeated. I didn’t have time to do the form. I couldn’t find a printer anywhere. Life was mayhem. We were messaging back and forth as HE couldn’t find a printer either…and then suggested that we push the meeting BACK to 9pm, instead of 8pm, so he could go and BUY A PRINTER, to print off the form and have me sign it before the meeting.

So, I had to chill for an hour with a wine, by station luggage trollies, in my golden dress and my faux fur, as strangers kept popping up to me and telling me that ‘loved the blog.’ All drunks love this blog. That makes me smile. 🙂 I don’t thing i’ve selfied with as many trashed people in my life. I should’ve charged.

Now, I was Snapchatting EVERYTHING! Thank you to those who were watching all this in action. And Abeiku Arthur was also watching my pain and PISSING HIMSELF LAUGHING.

So after he smashed his last meeting at 7pm, he messaged me to tell him to..

‘Meet me out the back..’

And there he was, with his smug little African face, pissing himself that CHRISSIE WUNNA, QUEEN OF GLAMOUR PUSSES, was stood on her own, by luggage trollies, looking like a dickhead, because unlike his finely polished meetings, MY MEETINGS WERE going tits up!

He sauntered out of his car, walked up to me and PISSED HIMSELF LAUGHING, demanded KFC and said,

‘It totally looks like you’ve been stood up! HHAHAHA!’

‘DUDE. I’m waiting for the guy to print off the non disclosure form before he speaks to me…’

”THAT’S FUCK UP. LOL. That’s not how you conduct business. You’re waiting by trollies I want a KFC.’

‘You know ********* is at ****** right now.’

‘Can’t you just fuck off your meeting and we’ll go there to see them…and then you can just get a ride home with me.’

‘No. I’ve got to be there in fifteen minutes..’

‘Surely people meet YOU because they want EVERYONE TO KNOW what they’re doing??? It’s backwards.’

Time flew with company…company that I was SO GRATEFUL for and it seemed that I was all dressed up with somewhere to go finally! Y’see, the thing about Mr. ‘House of Solo’ is that he’ll always pop up and keep me company…even if he’s performing a piss take.

He drove me to my meeting to make sure I was safe…

‘Right, i’ll wait here for five minutes, so text me….then i’m gone…’

I was fine. I mean, GOD. I’m the most independent chick that The Earth has ever birthed. But that was really sweet of him. He sang and danced all the way in the car, to ‘Boss it‘ hip hop jams, as he drove me, through the city streets.

My meeting was still..

‘I’m en route and running late….

So I stood on the bridge at The Leeds Docks, over the canal, watching the stillness of the night, as the lights of Mumtaz reflected onto the water and with mood lit, skyscraper buildings surrounding me. Tipsy 20 somethings.. in suits, who had been at the races all day staggered by in good spirit. There were couples, couples, everywhere couples. All in love. All excited. All in lust…and for the first time in ages…it bothered me. I wondered where my ‘counterpart’ was? Am I just going to be single forever? My life partner is currently roaming around the Earth…trying to find me. If you see him…GIVE HIM A FUCKING MAP, A LIFT, CALL HIM AN UBER, GET HIM HERE. 🙂

Then my meeting came walking across the bridge, by the Royal Armouries. (Which is where I did the Leeds Lifestyle Awards.’ He shook my hand under the evening stars…as he introduced himself…

AND I CAN’T TELL YOU ANYTHING MORE BECAUSE OF A NON DISCLOSURE AGREEMENT LOL. 

I got home at midnight. I had early morning breakfast with the babies. We all went to a shoot at noon, yet we had to push it back to Saturday, so I can sort out better styling etc…These shots are going to be AMAZING and we all agreed that we wanted them out there exactly right! (So I’ll be telling you all about it….next weekend.)

I then did lunch with my Mum at my Favoruite Local spot Ego, in Ackworth. What is better than Sunday Dinner and cocktails. The kids love it. I love it.

AND….

I SPOTTED A REAL LIFE COUGAR IN THERE TODAY. I always talk about cougars and joke about how i’m one in training. (I’m not joking. I AM one in training. I always date younger than me.)

But I hardly ever see a real life ‘Cougary Couple.’ TODAY! I DID! And it made me feel moderately awkward. Lol. She didn’t OWN her Cougarness…She infact looked really insecure. Hahaha! Like whenever he looked away, at just ANYTHING. A glass, a light switch…a hot Burmese Oriental chick. 🙂 She threw ‘daggers’ at him with her eyes. I can’t tell if he’s going to get loads of blow jobs tonight, so she wins him back over, or if he’s going to get none for just looking around him?

When i’m a cougar. I’m going to BOSS IT! 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

Human Nature, Boyfriends & Positive Bits

‘What three things make YOU think that you’re such great boyfriend? Did you get any steak? Did you get any blowjobs? NO! Your girlfriend will definitely leave you…Lol’

….said the Little Burmese Glamour Puss, to ‘The New Arrival’ who’ll I think i’ll just name ‘Sellers,’ for now. He’s strutted into Wunna land and we all find him hilarious…YET, we don’t know him well enough to ‘title’ him with the magic…I enjoyed swinging back upon my chair, armed with wit and with my glasses down my nose, as I began questioning him about life…The great thing was that he actually found it SO easy to ‘chitter chatter’ AND make fun of us all. Lol.

‘Well…I’m loving, kind…and compassionate…’

‘What? So you’re just nice? They’re all in one category.’

‘Haha..No. She’d never leave me because i’m loving, I have a tongue like a lizard and i’m pretty much the bank….’

There was a *pause* and then laughter filled the bubble as we continued to singalong to any radio songs that would have us…;) We *push and pulled like a magnet tooooo….* 

I mean, we’ve got to give him some praise, the poor guy chilled in a girl’s ‘friend zone’ for months, before he managed to wiggle on in and be her Knight. It’s not that easy to shimmie your tunnel from ‘friend zone’ to ‘forever love!‘ So, well done him! The point is..HE DID IT!

‘And now you live happily ever after…with your girlfriend….and bunny… LOL’

Then ‘Double B’ turns to me, with a phone in her hand and shouts….

‘The King of the North wants to know why you aren’t returning his messages…. and are you wearing pants?:)

My version of life, although busy was great today. I’m feeling lucky….I’m grateful…

However, away from the tinkering and the jiggery pokery…I’ve sort of bumped into life today unexpectedly, which tottered me into a bundle of  people, you were tending to their versions of life…

It can be tough, right? We all go through the best of times, the worst of times…and just times in general. I’m lucky, as I’ve served my ‘worst of times’ early in life….and I survived them with a ‘bounce back‘ flag, sensible bells on and a smile. I mean GOD, there were times both here in the UK and in LA (where I did my 20s) and I just*looked around me* like a ‘no hoper.’  I didn’t even KNOW what I was going to do..? But i’m naturally a trooper. I don’t have to find it or force it.

I don’t even really need to TRY to be happy, or TRY to bounce back, or TRY to see the positive….It just happens. I find it really easy…

So basically, when I opened my tightly squeezed eyes and noticed that even though I had my *fingers crossed* the whole entire time through the ‘rough sails..’

I was always going to be alright in the end.

It’s like I say…My blog works because I tap into human existence. I do it my own way, by telling my own story, as I don’t necessarily believe that someone can tell you how to be YOU or live your version of life.

….WE’RE ALL DIFFERENT.

Yet saying that, I also KNOW that it doesn’t matter where you’re from, what you do, how rich or poor you are, how pretty people think you are…whether you’ve made all your dreams come true, or you’re nowhere near even trying….

We all FEEL the same way…We have ALL cried when we’ve felt hurt. We’ve all LAUGHED OUT LOUD when something’s tickled us. We’ve all been scared. We’ve all had a moment of bravery. We’ve all disappointed ourselves time and time again…Yet, we’ve all also done something great repeatedly and everyday! We’ve ALL had our heart broken at some point and we’ve ALL fallen in love before….

It doesn’t matter what walk of life you’re living…at some point you’ll meet these moments…and that is what I write about….So no matter where you are in the world? There is something in my story, that you can relate to. Click back through my archives and find it…

It connects us…

Today, my little sexy eyes had a tinker and what I learnt is that, it’s really important for people to feel appreciated. It’s REALLY IMPORTANT to not just have the heart and the talent to NOTICE the positive things in a situation, person or lifestyle…Yet also BELIEVE in those positive things….When you do…You should make sure your positive energy alive and then transfer it where needs be…

We like that as humans, don’t we? A bit of a love, a pat on the back…a smile of achievement…a cuddle….a rum….

Shit happpens! Lots of shit happens! And it’s the ones that fight through the shitty parts. in order to see the light at the end of the tunnel that win, because ‘The Big Dude’ up above will be terrified of you 🙂 but secretly proud of you. Honestly, I know this from experience, He will cut you some glittery slack and give you the life that you’ve actually worked hard for…Be it in love or business..

Find the good bits to every story, really focus on them. There’s always ‘good bits’ in every story..

…even if your world is smeared in ‘dodgy times.’ (That should be the name of an aftershave.)

THEN with a Malibu Pineapple in your hand…‘Edit‘ out the bad and the better you get at it, the quicker the process will become…

It’s like keeping that pair of shoes that ALWAYS without fail nip at your toes, rub at your feet and make you blister in absolute agony…You keep trying to bed them in‘ but they keep coming back with a *middle finger and saloon girl kicks.*

Just slap on an ‘edit/delete‘ tag, chuck the ‘naughties’ out and buy yourself a NEW pair that work better for you…

You have one life to live…Don’t waste it in ‘bad shoes..’