We got issues…


Today we really wanted to win the lottery. We REALLY wanted to win it! Oh, and when I say ‘we.’ I’m meaning ‘Bev’ and I. I’ve worked with Bev for quite a long time and almost instantly we became great friends. We’re similar, we just get on really well. She’s older but sexy… (and most importantly) we share the SAME SENSE OF HUMOUR. There is nothing that Bev does not GET about me. She completely understands me and never ever judges me. She’s not weird, she’s always cool. But today, after swearing and a randy bit of bacon…we wanted to win the lottery. We were leaving the ‘mundane’ to live the fantasy of ‘being a beach bum’ and a ‘glamour puss.’ She felt old. I was on my long work stint, which kinda makes me exhausted. (I need fun inbetween hard work always…or wine.) And today we were sure that life was worth living and FOR living and that we were really lucky to be where we were in life, as we have our perspective of it down, yet GOD, it’d be better if we won the lottery. Today we decided that we wouldn’t work if we won the lottery. (Well I said, i’d just do the things i love, like my beauty line…and Wunna land…as i’m just a being that needs to make my mark and not leave this world not a legend. Lol. Even if i’m only a tiny legend. And when i say ‘legend,’ I mean to MYSELF. I have my own goals ticking over in my head and i am always hardest on MYSELF. Yet i’m not too hard, as i’m naturally soft and slack.)

It was a good day as we were happy. We shared moments. We shared dreams. We talked love, life and boys. And well she said that the best thing about me, away from the ‘ooh laa’ of being Wunna, was just the simple fact that I was weirdly a really good person. Lol. (I enjoy ‘weirdly.’) But y’see, along with being a good person and only a good person will get this…is the simple fact that, at times or most of the time you end up putting others and the world of others, the wishes of others, the happiness of others…before you place yourself as ‘number 1.’

That’s okay, but it’s not neccessarily a good thing, as the bad folk will jump on that, sniff it out and use the hell out of you. (And i’ve had that loads.) However, it has never ever made me quit being generous..as it’s just against my nature. I like to see people happy. I like to make people happy. Hence, why i’m excited by entertainment, good people and making life worth it, for as many people as i can.

But today we really wanted to win the lottery. (Bev wanted to open her own cafe, as we tinkered through ‘dream land’ this afternoon,. However, she said, it’d be rubbish if we both worked in it, as nothing would get done for simple reasons like ‘it’s sunny.’ So even in her daydream..she shut it…turned the ‘open’ sign to ‘closed’ LOL…and went with just having millions.)

Lots is happening to me right now. This week has been quite a long one and i’m feeling a little over worked. Yet, i only have six more shifts and ten more days before i’m relaxing and open air hot tubbing in the luxury forest cabin with my babies. I’m really looking forward to normal family life and doing the things i never get to do, like lay in, breathe in fresh air, cook three meals a day for the family, and bubble over with champagne in my private hot tub. I’m feeling positive and looking on the bright side. I have one more day of work and then it is MY WEEKEND OFF TO PLAY! (Even though no one wants to do anything with me. ) *Rolls eyes.*

The lash line is going fantastically right now, as it reaches the hands of glamour pusses around the world, normal chicks, friends, lovers, fighters and women across the lands. They are decorating the eyes of the ‘Geordie Shore’ ladies and sponsoring award ceremonies like ‘The Screen Nations.’ It’s going really well and to the point where I can now release a second line to compliment the first, so I am later this year, where this time my lash styles will be named after my favourite British Boys. (I’ll even be running a competition, where you’ll get to win lots of stuff, to have one of the lash styles named after ‘YOU.’ Meaning boys, or girls who have yummy husbands, or boyfriends, can nominate their bit of boy to become one of my lash styles..and along with prizes, they will get to photoshoot for the line with me and become one of the faces of ‘Chrissie Wunna lashes.’)

It’s actually taking off really well and I can’t believe it at all, but i’ve worked hard and i’ve been lucky, which isn’t a bad combo, when it comes to success. My friend Jane used to always say that i referred to my successes as happening ‘by accident’ which apparently to her was the biggest load of bullshit ever, as to her, i was the hardest working girl she had ever known, you always did it with a smile and a giggle.

I’ll feel under pressure at times, and i’ll hide it. But i know that feeling under pressure doesn’t help anything and that everything always ends up right in the end, if you focus. In fact, putting yourself under pressure can seriously fuck you up. You make bad choices at bad times. Instead of great choices, with a sound mind. ( I mean , look what happened to Keiran when he lost his mind. Only now, 2 years later, he sort of regrets it all and realises what he lost, but in a way knowing that gave me peace in my heart and only because i knew that what i had said years ago was RIGHT. Yes, it’s too late and yes he put me through a lot of stress. But i came out the other end smiling and WITHOUT HIM.)

I mean my 2014 was the worst year i had ever gone through in my life, but i sort of surfed it like a champion, got it down the way i needed it to and got my life sorted. I never felt sooo sorry for myself that i gave in. I knew what i needed to do and did it. I worked almost every hour at a day job, two full times jobs at one point, I moved, I created and started my own business, that i plunged money into, I raised two babies as a single mum, all on my own..and worked hard enough to get the first one into private school…all by myself! And this all happened in ONE YEAR and it happened because i had two options, I could’ve either drank myself into a sniffly mess, or i could just make everything work for me. Ruby and Junior steered my decision making…and before you know it *boom.* I did it. That’s why i’ll hardly ever say but i hate it when people ‘hate’ on me and palm me off as some loser, gold digging, boobied, no substance floozy. I have worked my fucking ARSE OFF. I’ve laughed through it, i’ve cried through it, i’ve not listened to the back chat and focussed on what matters. I’ve been honest. I’ve held my head high. I changed everything and surrounded myself around great people. In my mind…I’m a fucking hero. Lol.  So nothing is more annoying to me than the ‘tapper.. with tits,’ if they’re lucky. :)

But y’know, being some kind of ‘hero’ and being able to be Miss.Independent, hasn’t neccesarily worked in my favour with boys…It either makes them feel threatened, or makes them feel like they can’t take care of me, the way they maybe would wish too and they ‘hit’ panic button, with a great ‘Awooga’ and go running off into the distance, because in their head i’ll obviously dash off with some other ‘more worthy’ human being, which actually would never happen? Odd isn’t it? But such behaviour occurs ALL THE TIME. I mean, whats the point in me working hard and building a future to not even have it celebrated as a couple, right? Yet, you hear about men moaning about having to pay for lazy chicks all the time. Yet maybe they secretly like it, as it subconsciously makes them feel like a man. It makes them feel powerful, gives them a sense of control and sort of stamps their ‘man role’ out in big black ink.

With me, it’s really different..as they saunter blindly into Wunna land and Wunna land is bouji. Yet, a bit of bouji Wunna land is all sorted out by Wunna, who is moi. :) Don’t get me wrong, I get treated a lot…A LOT and i’m every bit The Princess, that i think all girls should be…yet i’m not someone who doesn’t hold her own and men SHOULD fine that attractive. But in the long run… they don’t, as it changes the dynamic of a normal relationship. :)

I’m tired, I’m with the babies. I have a late night conference call with America, about my lash line…then i’m having a massive wine. In fact, i’ll have a massive wine whilst doing the conference call. Fuck it, i’m bouji.

I have one more day of work, then i am FINALLY ON MY WEEKEND. I thought i had Friday day off, but i don’t. Yet at five o clock TOMORROW, after a hard days work, i’m FREEEE!

I feel as though i have this awesome future ahead of me and when i feel like this, it makes me feel powerful.

Wunna x















Rub me down…


OMG! Yesterday I had the BEST MASSAGE in the entire world ever!!

Now, when i was younger (and I grew up not having to struggle) my Mum would make me have a massage every week and simply because it was good for my health, helped me stay balanced, stopped me from stressing and well introduced me to luxury and the art of enjoying it.

Since, being an oldie, i haven’t stuck to my massage rule. I’ve had massages…lots of them…yet not frequently enough to keep me ‘zen.’ (I once got thrown out of a  Zen GARDEN cafe, in LA, at night, by a Koi pond, for smoking a cigarette and ashing on things. This guy in a man bun chucked me out, because i was ruining everyone’s total enlightenment. They were just having tea? I mean for fucks sake…if you don’t want me to ash on things please provide ashtrays that look like ash trays and not Buddha.)

But yes, for the last month EVERY TUESDAY, after work i’ve been going to a local masseuse for a physiotherapy massage, to keep my blood running, my body supple, to mainly de stress and to make something healthy a part of my lifestyle.

It has been amazing. It hurts like hell. But it’s amazing. (I do have a dodgy spine and ankle so it IS kinda needed and not just a luxury.) However, the massages have been getting better and better and i’ve been getting along with my masseuse swimmingly as she tells me all about her life as she rubs me down.

Anyhow, over the weekend (and she’s called ‘Chrissie’ too..) she went on a course and learnt ‘new techniques.’ Now, I’m always fucking terrified of new techniques..as to me it means scary as hell.

I wasn’t wrong, as she daintily sauntered over to the music playing machine and whopped on this African drum beats. It sounded intense. like some Mayan war was about to kick start. So,  I smiled, I took a deep breath and got really terrified.

She prepped me for what was about to happen and so there i laid on my tummy, bra less, with my head in the hole thing.

OMFG! Then this beautiful little, dainty blond lady, jammed her elbow into one side of my back, so i could feel the most pain ever…and slooowly dragged it all the way up my spine and over my shoulder blade. OUCH!

It lasted ages and well any time anyone ever says to you, ‘if it hurts just scream stop’ you know you’re in trouble.


However, i realised that i’m actually not as squeamish as i thought, as my pride got the better of me and i held my breath, let the torture happen and said nothing. I suffered in silence…but once she reached the end of my shoulder blade and i heard her elbow bang against the massage bed, as it slung off my body, i have NEVER FELT SO GLORIOUS, like i achieved everything in the world and back. It was amazing.

Then she did the other side.

Then she flipped me over and stretched my arms out of their sockets, as I breathed out and she raised them above my head.

Each time she’d cutely totter around me, with a smile and tiny specs, saying ‘right now the other side.’

I looked at her, laughed and said, ‘You’d make a good dominatrix. A really cute looking one, that’s EVIL.’ :)

We giggled and then she told me off for laughing whilst she stretched my arm out of it’s socket, because it wouldn’t make the therapy effective.

I’m going again. Today i’ve never felt better, Every Tuesday. I’m there. I love it and i’m so proud of myself for paying out for something that is good for me and not ..wine or beauty. :)

I’m calming down and sorting my priorities now.

My masseuse has a ‘Bucket list’ she just got a tattoo and has booked to go to the ‘Beautiful say’s festival. Her ‘Bucket list’ is the same as her husbands…which i absolutely adore, as i’ve always wanted a life partner who actually wanted to DO LIFE, with me..enjoy things, live and have fun with. They got their tattoos together, they’re raising a family..she feels lost without him…it’s lovely. I want that…and because the way she looks as she tells me her stories, tells me that it’s the best feeling in the world ever. :)

Notice the little things…oh and for the all bad vices you put your money towards, make sure that you put your money or time onto or into something positive…something that is good for you. :) x

Wunna x


Opportunity Knocks?


So, in life…there are ups, there are downs, there are open doors, there are closed doors there are good opportunities, bad falls, there are the most wonderful times on the planet, balanced out with the most heart breaking times on earth, yet there is always two options and the option of developing yourself for the better, or doing nothing and staying put.

Now, i’ve always been an ambitious girl. Anyone who’s ever known me, will tell you that since being 13, i’ve always aspired for greatness. I’ve wanted to make my mark on this earth since being born, make money, be a star, work hard, be a success…be everything i could be. Yet at the same time, i’ve wanted to be loved, hold love, enjoy life, grow a family, be a decent human being and be able to have it all. AND I WILL.

Today, i’m here to tell you that, you can totally have it all. If you make giant career moves, that sacrifice your love life…know that the right guy or girl, no matter what will always stand by your side, through thick and thin and that’s what love is about. Plus, they will cheerlead you through your dreams and ambitions, instead of stifling you or your opportunities, which could prevent you from moving forward in life. I hate that. I don’t do that to anyone and I would never let someone do that to me. However, I have in the past left opportunities slide, due to boys i’ve been dating int he past, who didn’t want me to pursue such greatness…:) and well…every day I regret it. So, from that point on i never stifled a boy and his dreams and always focus on achievement, paving my own way to success and doing so like a hero.

Also, if you’re giving up some kind of lifestyle or work, simply for the art of love and life…y’know, for something that you care about…know that as long as you ARE in love and not infatuated, then that also can be a wonderful thing, as you can find any job, anywhere, that can make ends meet, Yet you may never feel, find or be as lucky to meet or be with the person you’re with right now…ever and as the saying goes….love conquers all and all that jazzy stuff.

So at the end of the day it’s all about balance. It’s about being able to finally straighten your life out literally, where you have it all, the job of your dreams, a family, the perfect partner and without any grief or trouble. Money, love, family, happiness, self worth.

All it takes is two of the right kind of people, who see life through the same kind of eyes…and everything turns out what i call ‘Wunnaful.’

I’ve usually dated boys who have either not approved of my occupation, lifestyle or the way Wunna land works, as it’s very different to most usual life styles and almost more surreal than people think. It’s only when you become part of it do you realise how tricky or how wonderful it actually is. But no matter and i used to say it years back, that  i’ve always known that the right boy will fit in perfectly because he’d just see me for me, understand what i do or have to do…and celebrate it with me. I have never ever thought differently and it is THAT, that makes me attractive. I am the most understanding human on the planet and simply because i’ve lived, walked a million paths all over the world and fucked up LOADS.

I’m a supportive girl and i’ve always cheerled people on, whole heartedly as i see far too many people around me who have never ever tried to make a dream come true, never exercised ambition or never even thought to make something of themselves. I’ve watched people shut down the dreams of others and squish them into nothingness.

Everything i’ve said i was going to do in life ‘move to Hollywood, be on the telly, marry a movie star…’ i’ve done. EVERYTHING. Even when i said i was going to play ping pong with Leonardo Di Caprio. I did it. I said that Joe Fiennes would take me on a date…he did. I said i’d write a book, have children, start a beauty line…I did…i did…and you can do it too. I’ve never kept a ‘Bucket list’ because before i’ve written my next point down..i’ve done it.

Don’t be afraid to try new things and know that you will always have the best people around you, no matter what choices you make. Those people will not hinder your process, but help…

Anyway, away from that, I’ve felt in my own head at work today. Odd day, when you’ve sort of ploked a smile on your face, but on the inside something is worrying you. That’s been me.

People noticed, which means i’m usually the kinda chipper that isn’t just external, but radiates from within. (That’s a good thing.) But like the trooper that I am, i got on with it.

Right now in life i just believe that life is so short and the rug can really be pulled form under you at any time, so it’s important to enjoy the world, love hard, do things, be happy. Never throw a pity party. Always just get on with it., whilst knowing that everything is going to be okay. MORE than okay.  :)

The good thing is that i’m doing dreams come true. The lash line is currently doing really well. The blog is hitting heights. I’m happy and i honestly can’t even believe how lucky i am, just to sort of have things the way i kinda wised it to be. I want more and i’ll get more success…yet every step i take i’m sort of super grateful for…because i know a lot of people have life a lot rougher than i do.

I went to quiz night last night. I was dying for a drink after work and the Artisan Tap and Barrel in Pontefract is my new favourite place, because it’s just of good quality. It’s a cosy place, where you can enjoy good liquor and have a fricking cheeseboard.

Quiz night was fun. It was only really my group of friends ‘quizzing it up.’ so we all go separated into ‘twos’..my two being with Tony and our Team name being ‘Balls deep.’ He had his new selfie stick all night so everything was all about ‘selfies’ and well Luke was a ‘tapper’…meaning he tried to scrag things off everyone all night. Lol. Everytime he did, i’d sing parts of ‘Goldigger’ at him. But he loved it. :)

We all tried a bit harder than last week and got our competition faces on. The quiz went well…we rocked it. We didn’t win. Infact NO OF US WON and there were four separate teams of us! LOL.

Who won?

This random guy that walked into the ‘Tap’ in what Dodge (who packs actual kebabs in his luggage for food) called his ‘quiz joggers’ WON the entire thing! He came into OUR BAR and stole our fucking QUIZ…and WHILST HE WAS FUCKING FASHION CRIMING. Maroon quiz joggers and a beer belly.

He won.

We all nearly did. (No we didn’t. We came second t fucking last)

Then we ate sandwiches, chattered and all got tired and went home.

I feel like an oldie right now. But i like it. :)

I’m on chill mode. I’m on grown up mode. I’m on ‘focus on work’ mode and success, but still have love, feel love with a dash of excitement and fun..mode. (Since, i’m saying it a lot.)






Cos, i’m feeeeellliiiiIIiiiiing Goood.


Today i’m content. I’m happy. I’m confident. I’m strong. Everything’s pretty normal. Nothing too special is going on, but i’m brimming over with ‘va voom’ and when that happens i always feel internally awesome.

I’m quite calm right now and feeling as though i can take life in my stride, which is the complete opposite to my ‘this time last year’ where Keiran was being troublesome and turning my world upside down for no real reason, other that douchiness.

I’ve been through a lot in my life, but i’m never one to feel scared to do it all over, bounce back and be a hero. I’m someone that will naturally always see the good in everything before it turns sour and even when it turns sour, i’m kitten strong enough to soothe it over…even after gin.

Things happen and everyone has a past, a moment, a story to tell that has formed them into the being that they are today. If that being is good then that is great as it can only develop into EVEN MORE greatness. And if it’s bad, you’re lucky too, as the only ways really is UP.

I’m thoroughly missing LA right now and mainly because i’m missing my friends and my previous lifestyle. It’s only because i want fun and i’m working so hard right now that i’ve been too busy to just have an awesome blow out,.I work hard and because i just want to do well. Yet, i need fun. I need a cuddle and I need to enjoy life. I thought I had Friday off work this weekend, but i now don’t…so it’s just a free Saturday and Sunday for me…but it’s better than nothing and well who cares, it’s money and almost my time to venture to the forest for open air hot tubbing and champagne.

Champagne and fruit shoots are the ONLY options that i currently have to drink in my house, right now.It’s annoying , as I hate to faff around with the opening of a champers bottle. I just like it to be done for me…always. Y’know, I haven’t spoken to ‘London boy’ in ages. He’s disappeared off the radar just randomly, in a ‘well there goes another friendship’ fashion. I hope he’s okay, as when men randomly venture off, they usually have stuff going on.

I miss my LA friends Theo, Ronnie (who i’ve named my lashes after) and Jake. I’ve remembered a time when i was on my LA friends Jeff’s roof terrace, where he had a bar, a cinema, a Buddha, fairy lights and a clock that always said that it was New Years eve. He let me sleep on his sofa often…and well his appartment used to be a proper dingy brothel. (I have the weirdest memories.)

I’ve had a wonderful evening with my babies. The happiest babies in all the land. They’ve made me feel whole and I can’t believe how lucky I am to have them. I adore family life, as deep down that is really who I am. I’m pretty grounded when it comes to all that…yet it’s balanced well with fun and the odd moment of foolishness. I know how to let my hair down and liquor up for ‘can can’ kicks. :)

I’m concentrating on work for the rest of the week now. I’m working until Friday, so i’m knuckling down. I’m hoping to go to the pub tomorrow night after work, but no one can be arsed to text me back. Lol. (Totally much. Proper Billy no mates. Last time that happened, i ended up in London.)

And i’m looking forward to June 12th, when i am on the Britain’s Got talent, Forbidden Night’s boy’s, exclusive VIP boat party on the River thames. It’s on the river, with drinks and their show! How amazing…especially as the sun sets upon us!!! Their show is the BEST show i have ever been to in my entire life and simply because the atmosphere is just AMAZING. YOU MUST GO!

But yes, for now, i’m off to bed and i’m getting ready for a week of work.

I want Tuesday night pub though. (Tuesday drinking is a must as it breaks down your week and makes you balance out the ‘play hard’ with your ‘work hard.’)




Wine, Work & People in my business..


Hey Dolls!

I’ve worked all day and it’s been awesome. The great thing about ‘awesome’ days at work, is that that you NEVER expect them to be that awesome, meaning that when they are…or if they’re not so bad, then you get all giddy, like you’ve won trophies or something even better. I think I just work with a decent bunch of people, which makes work 100 times more excellent. Plus, other than work colleague Adam having new hair, I found out that I have Friday, Saturday and Sunday off this week coming. What??? Again! I CANNOT WAIT! This weekend i’m DEFINITELY wanting to plan something adventurous, something different…something new. Especially since I have Friday off also. Whether it be a trip down to London, or a check into a five star hotel..I just want an adventure. I fun spontaneous one, with whoever wants to join in. (No one ever wants to ‘join in’ things with me…as being impulsively fun terrifies people, breaks the bank or is just not what the Doctor ordered for them. Lol. Maybe it’s Me? I never thought about that!)

Anyway, last night, I went for a couple of drinks, like I said at ‘The tap and barrel’ in Pontefract. It was a Saturday, but i wasn’t really feeling it. I was sort of just drinking my lemonade and red wine lemonade spritzer and wondering what life would serve upl, in my big hair, dress and with a cheeseboard that Tony had bought us.

If anything, the cheeseboard was the highlight of the evening. It was again AMAZING. So amazing that we passed it around friends, who had just walked in and they sat by it and ate it like the world was the happiest place that any human could wish to be upon. I mean, Tony only bought the cheeseboard because he felt like he had to buy me something because I had bought him our drinks. It made him feel better and like he wasn’t indebted to anyone. Lol. I’m naturally generous and i’ll buy rounds of drinks for anyone, simply because i’m kind, i like people to be having a good time and well…if i have it, i’ll happily enjoy every single moment of treating others.

Dodge showed up and reminded me that ‘I want to be a Hippy’ was an actual song that I completely forgot existed and THEN further reminded me that the Saturday before WE LIVED CHUMBAWUMBA….because I found myself stood at the bar ‘in real life’ saying, ‘he’s had a whisky drink…and he’s had a lager drink…he’s had a…’ That’s when Dodge looked at me, sniggered and said, ‘shit isn’t that Chumbawumba.’ :) He was feeling rough because he did his own version of what i call my ‘tequila dance,’ except his doesn’t end on a merry go around in Hollywood, in neon…before passing out, his is upside down, doing shots, whilst telling REALLY SOBER PEOPLE to ‘Count him down.’ HAHAH.

‘Count me down bitches! Count me DOWN.’ (He apparently got PUT to bed. :)

Lots of people ended up coming out. I mean, Tony met me and decided to ramble on about buying courthouses that he can’t afford so he could turn them into brothels. Dodge and I were bosom buddies for the evening simply because the same people were annoying us. I felt a bit annoyed, maybe a little annoyed and i think it was simply because I was tired, I was ‘off button’ and lots of different people that I only half knew we’re all up in my business. :) It was an okay evening, but I was working in the morning, so i kinda felt bored…and when i’m bored i get the hump. I get bored EASILY and with anything that is either repetitive or dull…or looooong :) …hence why i’m looking to plan excitement, for the weekend to come.

I want to throw skin to the wind and live. I’m a chick that’s really ‘together’ yet a whole lot of fun at the same time. I guess the ‘package’ is good with me…i’m a bit of everything, good bits and bad bits combined. (But mainly good bits. HONEST!! :) I guess, what i have or am is ‘balanced.’ I’m foolish, but wise. Loud but quiet. Traditional and modern.)

I’m also someone who naturally likes doings things, ANY things in general. So, right now in life, i’m feeling pretty social. I’m bored though. I’m really bored. Everything feels so samey. Everything needs a Wunna touch, a bit of excitement. I want an adventure. Just a brief one as I have work and responsibilities. But i’m a happy soul and happy souls need pleasure.

I don’t even have anything else to say to you? I’m kinda all confused because it’s Sunday, yet feels like a Monday to me, because i’ve had to work. In fact, I bumped into Owen last night, who thought that i probably wouldn’t remember him. Lol. (I remember EVERYONE.) Ages ago, when i was young and just off the telly…Wazza and I had gone to ‘Biggies’ and well Owen was there…and a picture of him glaring at my boobies was taken and plastered almost everywhere. :) It apparently got him into a lot of trouble, but he said he didn’t care because he was actually looking. (I still apologized. :) ) Then we got into a talk about Nick, (as in Knight…as in ‘off the telly’ Nick) as he’s besties with the boy and…well I don’t know what or why…but Nick had apparently sauntered in with a ‘get this I saw Wunna today…’ and proceeded to tell a story. Now, when Nick had actually seen me on that day, he was all ‘blushy’ and strange and banging into Cacti. ( ‘I just sort of fumbled it all in front of her and dropped all these cactuses.’) So, in order to save embarrassment… all I’ll say is that Nick now builds greenhouses. (He doesn’t build greenhouses. In fact Owen asked me do a snapchat to his friend, yesterday to PROVE something to another.)

I need a chilled ‘vino’ moment  in my pj’s and a cuddle.

Lots of people are ticker tackering in my ‘business’ right now and it makes me feel odd. It sort of makes me not trust people. Or makes me worry unnecessarily.

It’s bizarre because i’m a girl who writes a very candid blog, a really open blog. Yet, i sort of tell you the bits that I want to tell you. I’m open, yet i’m still quite private (told you i was everything :) ) so the fuzziness and the buzz that comes with Wunna land, (although i’m grateful for it) can become a little much.

But i’m happy. So, let’s pour a wine and get on with it. x


Red Red Wine


So, yesterday was awesome. I had Friday off and always want Friday off from now on, yet although i’m the luckiest kitten in all the land, the Good Lord fails to love me that much and will therefore make me work every single Friday left on this earth until I collapse into a little Burmese…Glittery….heap. (*Cue: Rich’s bang into a wall fall here.* I STILL find that funny.)

Anyway, last night I did ‘The Carleton’ with Ben, who had come off his three day, 12 hour work stint. He actually came quickly 😉 …because… well I had told him too, as I was dying for a gin and well he wanted to because he was dying for 40 bottles of red wine.

When he arrived (and I had already checked us into a hotel) he looked all eager to *plunge* into any recreational vice that he could get his hands on and immediately. (That’s what work does to you. It makes you appreciate ‘good times’ and ‘having Friday’s off.’ It makes you desperate for a ‘blow out.’)

Luckily for him, i am made of the same matter…so we middle fingered a glass, bought a bottle of red, sat outside and indulged in glasses of wine, as day turned to night… until life and tiredness got the better of us.

I came inappropriately dressed…ie/hoochie. I’m the only human to wear Celeb Boutique at The Carleton. He came appropriately dressed (for once) but totally on ‘rant’ mode. :) Boy, did Ben have a rant. He must’ve covered every slither of possible rant ground in the universe…but he was adorable when he did it, so i sat, listened, laughed and swore sometimes. It was good because a really great way to get to know someone is to listen to them…Plus like I said, the time we spend together is always good. The wine was good too. :)

We moved inside because he forgot that it was freezing and ranted more. We talked life, love, friends, everything…We watched the bar supervisor yell at people, but adore us and we sort of just took a moment from life. a moment that was just us…like no one else in the entire pub mattered, they sort of blurred out into the background as we both got feisty and began stamping our views on life, people and relationships on each other…over vino. I actually learnt a lot about him last night….just from watching him and listening to him.

So, right now…i’m Ben’s girlfriend. We date. It’s going well. It’s slower than what i’m usually used to. But it’s good, as every single other relationship i’ve had has not been normal. They’ve kinda been rushed, or felt like a whirlwind…which isn’t ever a bad thing, yet if you’ve picked the wrong person, can end just as quickly as it started.

Now, i’m quite a confident girl. I’m a fun girl. I’m down to earth enough to laugh at myself, my life and my choices, but i sort of take the majority of relationships that i get into seriously…even if may not seem so. I have no idea why i’m that way inclined, yet I always blame my parents because they have been together for decades, so have set a standard for me to try and follow…badly. :) I must the only chick who has been divorced a gzillion times, who doesn’t actually really believe in divorce. Lol. Ben’s a good boyfriend choice, i think? I hope? Who knows, with my track record. Haha. Like I fancy Ben a lot and he’s always shocked that i may actually find him ‘sexy.’ But i do. He’s a lot of other things also…so right now, it’s great.

I assume that Ben is all good with us and that he secretly adores me. Yet, i honestly have no  clue as to how he may feel about me or the whole entire thing, as he’s not that open about with me. In fact, he was more open about it before we were together, like when he was pissed and on the phone talking about ‘sleeping on the left and being alone, ‘ when i had fallen asleep on him :) than he now. He’ll have tiny moments of expression, when it comes to ‘us’ and then he’ll just be hungry and crave food immediately, before changing the subject. HAHA. I’d like him to be more expressive, in that area, I think…as i’m a girl who’s super used to hearing that i’m adored from random strangers, via my inbox daily. Lol. So if they can do it, then why can’t he? Is what my head thinks…followed by, he must not fancy me? :)

But yeah, great night. We were kinda kept away from the other drunks at The Carleton because the supervisor liked us more and didn’t want us to hang out with the riff raff. Lol.

For some reason i’d bought us too much wine that we took with us…as we got in a taxi that took us to the hotel.

This morning Ben told me that cabbie called me a ‘dude’ when i got in the back of his car! Hahaha. I probably am and just haven’t noticed that i have a willy yet.

Anyway, got to the hotel…greeted politely…tottered into the lift, with two wine bottles in tow and with Ben (who doesn’t have ‘jammin’ on the end of his name.) They had actually put us in what i call ‘the naughty room’ which is kinda like the ‘retard table’ at weddings. It’s the room kept away from all the other nice, decent people, who may need some actual sleep. I always get judged and placed on or in the ‘naughty’ everything.

We swiped in, got undressed, got to bed…made out.

(It’s part of our ‘classic’ date style.)

I actually at one point had half my bondage outfit on, but it was a bit wrong, as my boobs didn’t’ fit into it properly, it was too hard to tie and i left the rubber stockings at home, which was the essential part of his request. Lol.

It lasted about five minutes before he ripped it off and flung it.

The usual happened and then we committed to the ‘spooning’ position and slept. The last thing he said to me was ‘do you feel safe’ after I told him that the person who is the ‘big spoon’ is naturally a being who likes to protect others. And that was how our Friday ended, with a simple ‘yes’ and some shut eye.

GOD!!! Then he woke up (we both woke up early, messed around a bit, then pulled ourselves together) and OH MY SWEET LORD, WHEN THAT BOY IS HUNGRY…HE WILL IMAGINE, TALK, SPOON, NAG, MOAN AND FANTASIZE about FOOD, until he is sat down infront of food and eating.

The first thing he did was read the menu and tell me to hurry up getting ready so we could eat,.

‘Hurry up.’

‘I need to do my face.’

‘Well what do you wanna eat? Shitty chicken or a breakfast?’

‘I’m doing my face. Shut up. The more you talk, the longer it will take.’

‘I’m fucking starving…. Can you just not put your eyelashes on!!!?!!’

‘Then don’t take a glamour puss then and date a chick who can roll out of bed and saunter out the door immediately.’

‘Fine. I think we should see other people.’

‘Fine. I’ll just date someone who isn’t hungry ALL the time. I’ll tell everyone i dumped you because you kept being hungry. Lol.’

We just laughed and got on with it…our banters good. My eyelashes got plonked on. We gathered our stuff and went downstairs to get breakfast…an ‘all you can eat’ breakfast…at the hotel and it wasn’t even bad. It was nice. The customer service was good too.

Did food. He felt good because he was having a ‘feeling thin’ day.

Drove him home, dropped him off and then arrived home about 9am…yes that early to spend the day with my Babies, Mum and family.

We basically just went to Doncaster and spoiled the children rotten.

I’m home now and even though i’m tired, i’m feeling a couple at the ‘tap’ this evening…(I do mean drinks.) I’m not going out, or doing going out by any means. I’m literally going to enjoy a couple and go home. I’ve got work in the morning and if it’s busy, i’m be shattered.

So, I best get ready and go.

Love ya x








Bunny tailed thongs, Wheely Bins & the homeless



Okay, so now i’m home after a whizz around Doncaster, being ‘lash’ productive and purchasing myself essential treats. Not that a ‘Noir Bullet’ from Ann Summers with a flat edge and a ribbon tied thong that doubles up as a bunny tail, incase I ever need it to, is an essential girly item, yet the humour value of the moment got the better of me. Especially because the cashier asked if i wanted a ‘strawberry penis lolly’ thrown in so i could claim some kind of discount? I’m terrified of willies, so nothing is worse to me than one on a stick, that tastes like berries, that you can suck on all day long. I got it anyway…like i said, i’m a ‘moment’ girl. But yeah, today has been productive. Lots of business and random purchasing. I don’t think i’ll ever need my thong to double up as a bunny tail? I mean, is that sexy? A chick hopping around your privates like a rabbit. It’s sexy for a moment, but really the guy just wants to ping it off and get on with the ‘lurve making.’

It all ended with a fake tan purchase (couldn’t be bothered with a spray tan) and a Taylor Swift carwash moment. Now, i’m home and I’m happy, ready for late lunch and school runs.

Tonight, when Ben finishes work, i’m doing ‘The Carleton,’ (the pub, not the Fresh Prince of Bel air dance) fun and ‘feeling up.’ Lol. It’s apparently the classic ‘Wunna/Reall’ date night. Yet, the good thing about Ben is that we could do absolutely nothing and it would still be fun. We get along well. However, I don’t want to go to a creepy woods to watch people ‘dogging,’ at midnight…(his favourite…hahaha) so i am finding a brief solution to this problem because that’s what good girls do. He’ll be chipper anyway because he would’ve come off his three day work stint and be ready to get pissed, definitely more pissed than I’ll get… plus it’s sunny and Friday so everything’s a win, win.

I’m currently eating chicken pesto pasta, with pine nuts, which is a bit odd since i’m apparently newly allergic to nuts, which may mean i may pass out and get a rash. But hey ho, worse has happened to me. It won’t be worse than the time a crazy LA druggie, who was pretending to be Jessica Simpson’s hair dresser threw a Hollywood wheelybin at me, when i wouldn’t let him cut my hair for cash…on the street. He kept having a pretend phone conversation with his hand…and i didn’t know if it was polite of me to mention that he was doing so, i pretended it wasn’t happening. Then he turned french and it freaked me out, so i might have mentioned something, with my tactless charm…(but honestly how much charm do you need for a homeless, hair cutting druggie)…then he turned nasty and threw a GIANT bin at me. I laughed and cried by another set of wheely bins by sushi and he stormed off in a ‘diva’ huff because he left his ‘luggage on wheels’ further up the road, which was a Louis Vuitton. PMSL. Only in LA, do the homeless have designer bags. Then he ran off to tell ‘Catwomen’ on me (this was on Hollywood Blvd so it may so really weird to you, but on Hollywood Blvd, that is full of prostitutes, druggies and tourists…it’s dead normal.) I think i met up with ‘Raffi’ that night, who is a music producer now and well, he’s done tracks for R Kelly Lol…and at the time we were cutting a track…a song…a do daa…He’d rock on over to my pad to chill after studio sessions, and then go to see Neyo…yes Neyo…after crashing his car on objects outside my home, which i’d then get done for by my roommate, who was fun…but a lawyer. (I once walked into my room and he had thrown some weird after party and i found a tranny and a boy having sex on my bed. I was tired from my night out and didn’t have anywhere to lay, as the downstairs was full of people, so i did what Wunna would so and just got out a sleeping bag, laid it on the floor of MY OWN BEDROOM, whilst the tranny and the due got it on and went to sleep. He can’t get me down for having friends drive into things, when that happened. :) )The things that i’ve experienced in life are shocking.

Bottom line…i can deal with a few pine nuts.

I’ve got nothing else to say other than it’s Friday, it’s Sunny, my lashes are doing well and so far today has been ace.

I hope your Friday is panning out nicely.

Lots of love,


Me x

No Money, No Honey?


Morning my hot tamales!

Today I am overwhelmed with excitement, buzzing like the happiest bee in all the land, brimming over, almost bubbling with a juicy flourish of ‘joie de vivre’ and simply because it’s Friday and I am COMPLETELY OFF WORK. Hurrah! I’ve managed to do my hair properly this morning, wake both babies up with ease, take the LONGEST morning shower ever, slip into a perfect, chilly Friday ‘Wunna land’ outfit, actually DO the nursery and school runs by MYSELF and take the day off simply to enjoy being ME.

(I’m currently in Starbucks Doncaster. The one in The Frenchgate centre. I have a mocha. I get to actually WRITE MY BLOG, IN THE ACTUAL MORNING WITH COFFEE. Woooo! I’m happy. I’m chilled. I have a fun evening planned with Ben and..well lets just say the chicks at Starbucks didn’t even toast my smoked salmon, cream cheese bagel this morning and I didn’t get pissed off. :) I utterly ‘heart’ Doncaster, as it is the town that I grew up in, the town that birthed me and whenever i’m hear i feel all cosy like i’m home. I get that feeling whenever I land in at LAX also and hit Los Angeles soil. I think it’s because i did the majority of my growing up in BOTH places, on both continents. They were really big times in my life and everywhere else seemed transit. However, now that i’m back in Ponty, living life, nurturing children…i’m finding it home and feeling settled. But I think that when you’ve lived everywhere, you sort of appreciate everything a little bit more.

I wanted to rant today but i couldn’t even begin to tell you what I needed to rant about, other than the fact that I can’t stand chavs, people who can’t clap a beat, rudeness, the fact that i’m going to have to take all my clothes off shortly, when it’s freezing for a spray tan and…SEE…can’t even think of anything.

I had a late night psychic reading last night and it was amazing. Y’see, whenever they read me, i always apparently get this refreshingly amazing cards, or readings that the readers don’t get to see EVER. I’m set for big things. HOWEVER, and they usually talk about business with me and how well it’s going to go. Yet last night, she focussed in on my love life…and i’m not going to tell you what she said, just yet, because it’ll make me look like a plank…as i have just entered a relationship…suddenly…out of nowhere, but with a smile. But anyway, she told me all this stuff…and it sort of shocked me, but sort of made me smile…like made my eyes smiles, so i must be more ready for things than i thought. It’s kind of an achievement for me, with my awesome track record in the love department.

(HAHAHAHAHAHA, SORRY. *Cut away.* Currently pissing myself at the fact that an old man, carrying a little latte has just come up to me and randomly said, ‘I’ve got a small one.’ HAHAHAHAHA. Dying! Oh god! No. Not the old man. 😉 )

But yeah, I won’t tell you what she said, but it’s great, if it pans out that way. So, if anything, it gave me ‘the most gorgeous sleep’ because i felt at peace. The babies also jumped into my bed, because for some reason right now, they can’t sleep unless we’re all together in one bed? Hurrah. (I don’t mind. 😉  I kinda love it.)

I think relationships are all about finding that *peace.* Not nnecessarilythat ‘calm’…but that *peace* where you sigh with relief because you feel as though your giant ‘life partner’ search is over and you can finally trust, breathe and be happy forever. I watch couples struggle and fight and well i’ve been in couples that struggle, fight and torture one another, due to simply not finding the right match, at the right time, or place, or emotional temperament. I’m not someone that believes you can be with anyone, if you’re in the right place at the right time. I honestly believe that there’s someone who you’re MEANT to be with…and no matter what, your life and experiences will meander around to get you to that being. We see them as chance meetings…but i reckon they’re all meant to happen.

But I know nothing, so don’t go on me. I’m a floozy, with too much tan on, wicked heels and giant eyelashes. I enjoy life. I enjoy love and that’s the key to it all. People waste so much time, moaning about what they don’t have, instead of enjoying what they do have.

Infact, boys do that do that with me, often. They spend a lot of time stressing about losing me or impressing me (but I do enjoy to be impressed) instead of just enjoying me, loving me and embracing it all bravely without worry. It actually makes ME worry when they do that, as i’m quite soft when in love…so i get all panicky and stressed. Lol.

I like open, expressive people in general. Especially when it comes to the men I date. You’ve all been there when you’ve been sat opposite a being, on some random blind or first date, that you don’t know and well getting them to just be themselves or express is like getting blood out of a stone. (I wanted to type ‘Billy goat’ then? Lol. I have no clue why? ) I mean, when i went on that girls night dinner with Katty, whilst we were waiting in the taxi rank, some girl had run in, who had escaped from her shitty blind date, by saying she ‘didn’t want a pudding.’ Lol The sheer happiness on her face, to be away from such a weirdo said it all.

Dating isn’t easy….until you find the right one. You know when you’ve found the right one, because you just do.

ANOTHER THING….I date Ben. I’m Ben’s girlfriend, but i’ve been hanging out with our mutual guy friends a lot. We both have. And it’s great. Yet, whilst we’re at what i call ‘the round table,’ girls…i’ve heard the boys moan and it seems that it’s a massive struggle and pressure for boys to always have to pay for a girl.

Right. I get that we as women adore to be romanced, taken care of, loved, and treated like we’re their ultimate Princess. I do. We all do and i believe in roles and manners. Yet, away from that…just so you’re not confused, because guys i don’t know think this of me a lot….i’m not a girl who doesn’t pay her own way EVER and it makes no difference as to whether i’m dating a movie star or a regular ‘joe.’ (I’ve never dated a Joe. Wait!! I HAVE. I  totally dated Joseph Fiennes! His movie was up for an Oscar and he spent part of his free time piggy backing me down a escalator, telling me he was Irish.)

Anyway, there’s letting a guy, be a guy (which they do like, as all men do wish they could please the object of their desire) and letting them pay for you. But then there’s taking the piss…when you don’t work, or don’t do your fair share, in the relationship, be it a bit of a ‘clean down,’ cook a tea, pay half…or whatever. It’s important to invest in your relationship equally, in order for there not to be any resentment, later down the road. PLUS, and i’m far from a feminist, but it’s important for a girl, in my mind, to be independent enough to stand tough financially and be able to pay her way through life with ‘VA VOOM.’ It’s sexier. If i want a pair of Jimmy Choos, i’ll buy myself a pair of Jimmy choos, in fact i’ll buy two pairs, because i’ve worked my own arse off and can get whatever I want, whenever i want and that’s what makes us WOMEN, without having to rely on another being to ‘okay’ a purchase. What could be worse!!

All i’m saying is that you don’t want you’re man, you’re boyfriend, your husband, your other half, to be that guy at the pub ’round table’ having a moan because he’s resentful. Don’t get me wrong, if they had all the money in the world, they’d spend it on you, wholeheartedly, repeatedly and without worry. HOWEVER, (and i know this from being quite masculine when it comes to money making and business) in order to get to that position, they need help and well…relationships are about building a future together.

I mean, I remember this girl in LA, whilst i was sat in a secret cafe garden, on a lawn, during a really warm evening, that had chimes tinkling in the background. It was low lit and lovely. She was with her now husband and she told me that he sat on that very lawn years ago, with a brown bagged sandwich, that they were sharing with hardly anything to his name, but had asked her to marry him. He promised her that he would love her forever, take care of her and be a success…at that point…he had nothing..

Now…he’s an extremely successful gentleman and all she said to me was, I watched him tell me all this, whilst he ate his half of his sandwich years ago, that I had to pay for because he was waiting for a payday, but i agreed to marry him because i believed him. HOW ROMANTIC.

I mean, from my own experience, look at Mike. He was a struggling actor on auditions in Hollywood. I had been paying for everything, not minding one bit as we were married at that time. He couldn’t even afford Burger King for our tea. But years later, after a bit of focus…he was on almost every TV show AND did that Tom Cruise movie a couple years ago. I remember meeting up with him, whilst i was still in LA for a coffee and a catch up, and when i went to pay, out of habit..he stopped me, laughed and said, ‘I can get this now.’ :)

So, what i’m saying is that dreams come true. They really do and they happen every single second of every single day. Boys… don’t stress, don’t moan, lay some ground rules, work hard. Girls… don’t pressure men, be independent, love and contribute. Everybody focus..and we’re all happy in the end!

I still don’t want to take all my clothes off for a spray tan. I need to find a way around it. FREEZING.









Weekends, Quiz Night, Bondage & Boys


‘Why do you have a bondage outfit?’

‘Cos my bedrooms funner than yours?’

‘I thought you didn’t even like bondage?’

‘Oh, I don’t. I’m not into sex and pain, but I can still rock crotchless, leather and studs…without being  clonked on the head by an iron bar, or shuffitied with a nailed ball gag.’

‘Wunna…why do you have rubber stockings?’

‘Oh…that was just a request. Told you, my bedroom’s funner than yours.’

‘It’s Thursday. You haven’t even had sex in a million years. There’s cobwebs ’round your shit.’

‘God, it’s only peep hole, crotchless, rubber, leather things. You should see the rest of my wardrobe…it’s like the cast of a pervy Disney world. Whoever bones you, must be really bored.’

‘You’re a bitch.’

‘Haha…a rubber stocking’d sexy bitch.’

[Both of us belly laugh. Life goes on.]

So, today is Thursday and today is awesome because i have never ever ever had a Friday COMPLETELY OFF WORK. Tomorrow, I have FRIDAY COMPLETELY OFF WORK, meaning that I can ACTUALLY do normal life things, that i’ve had to put off a million times due to hard work. YIPPEEEE! Plus, Tuesday and Friday’s are my ‘going out’ nights, the nights where the babies are with ‘Daddy’..and well i took a long time off being social during my marriage, during preganacy and during them being very very young. However, now i am fully able to celebrate a bit more ‘free time’without feeling guilty and like I said, when you’re a mum of two and you’re doing it on your own and you’re working a full time day job, running a business and keeping up appearances, as well as a blog, a love life, an audience and everything else in between…you deserve to dedicate time to ‘fun.’ You don’t have to, but if you wish to, you derserve to.  I’m social and I don’t care what anyone says. This is how Wunna land rolls.

I always think i’m this girl who can do or achieve anything and I think that way simply because.. in my life so far, I usually have and do. I’m ambitious, so there’s still lots more to come and lost more to achieve. But i just know that my futures bright, as are my children’s…and i whole heartedly believe that that’s the key to success. *So ram that in ya **po po** and wink at it.*

So, yes, like I said, my weekend has begun and I have i’m home with the babies having a dance off..which makes me smile. The babies adore it because they believe it’s a treat, when really the first game is ‘tidy the whole house up with Mummy, if you want a dance off.’ That’s why being a parent rocks. My kids WILL clean for a bit of a ‘good time.’ If i promised them chips, they’d scorn at me because it wasn’t sushi. But If I promise them chart music, dance off…they will both grab a brush, a cloth, some spray and a hoover..and we will get our clean down ON. :)

So tonight is all about family and tomorrow is all about fun. (During the day I have lash line stuff and hanging out.) Then I have FUN. Infact, hopefully, i’ll see Ben tomorrow, as our work schedules our the most clashy schedules of all time. But that’s very ‘us.’  It’s how we roll, although neither of us are good at making decisions it seems. I’m awesome at life decisions and rubbish at ‘doing things with a boy’ decisions. He’s not good at telling me what to do…his politeness gets in the way. Lol. But tomorrow should be fine as I have ‘fun’ scheduled in for Friday night and Saturday day. I only have to get to the end of the month, then i’m away for a week at the forest!! Yipppeee!

I had lots to tell you but i can’t remember it now?

Oh yeah, Tuesday! I did Quiz night with my a bunch of my boys. Dodge, Tony, Ben and I decided to rock up to the Tap and Barrel to be a team and answer questions, for money…at what felt like THE LONGEST AND HARDEST QUIZ IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. Infact, Dodge and Ben came later…pissed. They’d been drinking all day and chasing each other around a park with a stick?

Me:’ Why are you sweating?’

Ben: ‘Dodge was chasing me with a stick.’


Usually when Dodge walks in he *slaps* me across the face. This time he forgot too because he was pissed and instead, tried to FORCE ME to slap his regal, skinny jeaned thigh, that he had proppd up for slapping?

Dodge: ‘Bitch, slap it. Slap it bitch.’

Me: ‘No.’

Dodge: ‘Bitch, slap it now. I won’t stop. You WILL slap it, or i’ll pour all your drink over you.’

(I didn’t slap it. He did tip part of my drink out, before Ben saved it. Lol. Later on in the night he played ‘swizz around the spinning slate plate of eggy sandwiches to see where it stops.’ Wherever it stopped was what item he was going to throw at me. He had a pen in his hand, being the pointer. HAHAHA.)

Anyway, back to the Quiz night… When I first walked in loads of people I knew where there. But then they all left and left me with Tony..

This always happens. And according to Anna, we gt left together because we’re shits and GOD is forcing us to hangout to learn very important lessons in life. HAHA. Tony didn’t at first like taking this selfie, but let me in the end, after I failed to take a hundred of ‘just me’ selfies. I took one with him and it worked and he believes it’s because I thought i needed, what he called ‘a contrast, you bitch.’ HAHA.

Okay, back to the quiz and team spirit.

The problem with our ‘team’ was the fact that we kinda just wanted to drink and bop to music and chatter…like normal…meaning the longest, hardest quiz in the entire world, really kinda got in the way of fun. Yet, i’ll probably do it again next week. Lol. I thought it’d be easy questions about Beyonce or telly…or even really general knowledge. Not stuff about ‘Andrews/Rivers/Mexicans/Countries/The World and Intellects.’ I mean there was one question about telly, but it was kinda about ‘Crossroads’ the soap. Have you ever, even 100 years ago…watched ‘Crossroads’ in your fucking life? HAHAH. WTF!

Anyway…we didn’t win…it was long, with cig breaks inbetween, btu i still LOVED hanging out.

Marking the quiz was better because the paper that we ‘marked’ won. ALL i’m going to say is, any team that wins, when their answers were ‘Jimmy Saville/Harold Shipman & Viva Cas Vegas’ mans the rest of us must have been really bad. Apparently, Jimmy Saville is some Mexican river, Harold Shipman practiced his killing at Ponty hospital (because he had to start somewhere, the SAS are based in ‘Castleford’ and Elvis sang ‘Viva Cas Vegas.’

Now, our team, ‘Wunna & Friends/Dodge & The Downies/The Random Discharges etc…’ did actually try a bit to answer the questions. We were just thick, so got them all wrong. Just bored, because we’d prefer to drink. But on the whole…loved chilling with each other more than the other teams. :) Nothing makes you feel more thick than doing the ace ‘Tap and Barrel’ quiz night. Even the Quiz Master didn’t know the answers and he had them infront of him!

It was a good night though and well i drove and did lemonade because I had work in the morning, In fact we all had work in the morning.

Tony drove Dodge home and Ben and I had our usual ‘heart to heart’ in my car, which involves creepy woods, a bit of a talk, a cuddle and a make out.

I think i need to spend more quality time with Ben. We need more ‘us’ time…which still includes fun and friends…yet th more i hang out with someone…the better i get to know them and the better a connection becomes…right? But this is a slow moving process…yet it’s cool…i like it. It’s steady. I’m just not used to anything being slow, which is something can I NEED to get use to….(how many weddings down.)

Tony asked me if i had ever been to a wedding before? :)

I just looked at him, laughed and said, ‘ARE YOU KIDDING??’

I’ve been to MY OWN three times, let alone any others. In fact, Mike and I got married twice which makes 4 weddings. In fact, Mike jilted me at the altar in Vegas once also…which makes FIVE weddings. Lol. I don’t know if i’ll get married again…if i do, they’d have to prove to be something quite remarkable.

Ugh! Ruby’s just walked in and kicked over a giant glass of red wine on my cream carpet. Yay! Life rocks. Welcome to Wunna land.















Thanking You Kindly




Just a quick note to firstly say THANK YOU for reading this little blog and following my life as I ‘L’ plate along.

And secondly to REMIND you that YOU…yes YOU are reading this blog with thousands of other awesome human beings with excellent taste in glamour pusses.

This blog is currently read in EVERY CONTINENT OF THE WORLD and in 174 different countries!

(Look below. Every shaded country is a country that follows chrissiewunna.com The darker it is shaded…the more readers there are in that country. So obviously Greenland have poor taste.)



It is also translated into 40 different languages daily and all began on Myspace, before my best guy friend ‘Wazza’ gave my blog a home by hosting this website…and coming up with the idea in a Pontefract pub.

The blogging began in Los Angeles, when I had just divorced my first husband and become a tragic Hollywood party girl. EVERY DAY I wrote an entry, telling everyone what I as up to and simply as a form of therapy, because ‘DK’ who made my coffee every morning at the bookstore on 3rd and La Cienega, told me to, as he believed my daily ‘over the counter’ rants to him about boys, and partying were shocking!! He actually wrote my first ever blog on Myspace. :)


Then my balcony buddy Cletus, told me to start a diary in order to keep me moderately sane…

I did…

and i all of sudden became a blogger. In fact, back in my 20’s I was much cruder and honest …so my blog was actually ace…meaning it became popular FAST, as I took no prisoners and didn’t really care what anyone thought. :) Yipppeee!

At first only 8 people read it a month.

Now, it is read by tens of thousands of you monthly…and I couldn’t thank you enough.

I’ve met, loved, laughed and hated on soooo many people ALL over this entire world, throughout my life, each day, month and moment.

So far i’ve learnt that i’m a lot happier, stronger and more awesome than i every thought i was.. :) and most of all that no matter where we come from, what path we’ve found ourselves walking upon in life, not only could anything  happen, yet each one of us is simply as important as the other.

Being 34…simply means that i’ve learnt what matters, what actually matters in life, which is really different to the 24 year old version of me. :)

This is just MY story…and it is no more important than yours…

So I guess, i’ll just thank you and tell you that i love you lots,

Chrissie x


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